Homeschooled kids: Do they go away for college?

[aristocatz]

I know alot of you on here homeschool your kids & I wondered for the ones that homeschooled through high school: did your kids go away for college? Take on the full college experience with living in dorms and such?

If so, how did they adjust, since they didn't have the same social experience in high school as other kids?

 

[Swimnoid]

I didnt homeschool myself but DD had lots of friends who were homeschooled and lots of them went away to college and dealt with it fine. One of them went from our small southern "village" to NYC to go to NYU and now acts off Broadway! Can't find a much more different environment than that!

Although these kids didnt have the same school environment growing up they were involved in lots of different activities with kids thier age. And when they got to be highschool age they actually started to take classes at the local community college as well.

 

[laurie31]

I'm not sure how attending a public high school would help someone adjust to dorm life but I can say that my nephew was homeschooled from 4K through 12th grade and is doing beautifully in an out-of-state college.

Remember that homeschooled students usually develop more independent study habits and are more used to the way college classes are handled. Many attend a community college for some of their high school credits. Also, they have the opportunity for more varied activites, such as working in political campaigns, travel (my nephew took trips to Thailand and NYC while in high school), community service, etc. due to their more flexible schedules. I know public-schooled children can do these things too, but a homeschooler can work their classes around them, more like the way one does in college.

 

[Sleepy]

As others have said, not every child who is homeschooled lives an isolated life. Many of these kids are homeschooled because the schedule of traditional school and their activities clash. It does not mean they don't have friends or know how to act in a social setting. Many homeschooled kids are in a group setting where they meet to do activities and such together.

My son was in traditional school until he reached 9th grade. Due to his dance schedule, he was going to miss a couple hours of classes each day and the school could not work with that. Our only option was to do homeschooling. Since the majority of his day is in dance classes, he has just as much free social time there as he would during a day of public school. This summer he took dance classes in NYC and stayed in the dorms. He had a blast. I would say it was no different for him than it would have been for any other kid away from home for the first time.

My friend has 2 homeschooled children. One recently graduated Yale and the other is in her second year of Harvard. They both got the experience of dorm life and again, it was no different for them than any other kid.

 

[laurie31]

The group we homeschool with has 250 families. The graduating class has 40 kids this year. They will have a graduation ceremony just like public schooled seniors. We have Key Club, band, drama club, prom, yearbooks, most all that stuff that public schools have.

Thinkng back to what I had in public school versus what my DD has being homeschooled, the kids do miss out on the lunchroom drama, but I didn't experience anything like that in college so dealing with it in high school didn't exactly prepare me for anything.

ETA - I expect my 8th grade homeschooled DD to thrive in whatever college she chooses when that time comes. I hope she won't go out of state, but that's for financial reasons. If that's what she really wants, though, we will support her choice.

Also, you may wonder why we homeschool if she still goes to "school dances," we have a "school play," a "school yearbook," etc. Why not just do public school? It's the academics and the flexibility. In public school, DD could only have the four required subjects (English, math, science, and history/social studies) plus one elective, and PE. At home, she has 10 subjects (the four required by the state, plus PE, plus 5 electives). She also has time to take ballet, pre-pointe, tap, jazz, horseback riding, ballroom dance, flute, is in the band, sings in the choir, and she volunteers at our church. She would have to give up most of those things if she ever chooses to return to public school.

 

[kacaju]

I am a 4-H leader and over the years I have seen quite a few homeschooled kids and they are just as social as the schooled kids.

If you came to one of my meetings you would never be able to pick out who is home schooled, public schooled, private schooled and Catholic schooled. Right now I have about 25 kids in my club and the kids come from each of these schools.

 

[-Hope-]

My friend who is a professor at a nearby university and I have had many discussions about college and homeschoolers since we made the transition from public school a couple of years ago. He has shared with me on more than one occasion that the homeschooled freshman often adjust more easily to college life because it is more similar to what they are already accustomed to, both socially and academically.

 

[ladycollector]

LOL. Of course they do. I was homeschooled for 5 years starting in Grade 8 and am now a Senior in college. I adjusted easily to college and dorm life. If anything I was more prepared for college; I found it easier.

 

[Indiana Rose Lee]

I've got two in college. They had no problems adjusting, and were able to live on their own without any problems. One is getting a discount on his rent for doing upkeep on the house because he has spent so much time helping his dad on our homes.

Public schools don't teach you anything that is usesful for moving away. I went to school and was homesick. Dh went away and was a partier. Neither of those are blamed on the schools either.

 

[Eeyore'sthebest]

My friend who is a professor at a nearby university and I have had many discussions about college and homeschoolers since we made the transition from public school a couple of years ago. He has shared with me on more than one occasion that the homeschooled freshman often adjust more easily to college life because it is more similar to what they are already accustomed to, both socially and academically.

This makes a lot of sense when you think about it.
I wish I didn't work so many hours. I would love to homeschool DD.

 

[luvmy3]

I always find it odd that people wonder if homeschool kids will adjust socially when older, they aren't shut-ins
I have 2 nephews who are homeschooled, they go to class with other homeschooled students, they go on field trips with other students. They are also involved in extra curricular activities like sports and scouts. They have no problems adjusting to social situations any more than any other kids their age. I'm sure when they go off to college they won't either.


ETA, I do have a neighboor who homeschool's her children. Two of them are highschool aged, and the other is about 8. The younges one does lack some social skills but I believe that has more to do with neglect of homeschooling by the parent. The two other boys don't seem to have any problem socializing at all.

 

[3prettyprincesses]

I always find it odd that people wonder if homeschool kids will adjust socially when older, they aren't shut-ins
I have 2 nephews who are homeschooled, they go to class with other homeschooled students, they go on field trips with other students. They are also involved in extra curricular activities like sports and scouts. They have no problems adjusting to social situations any more than any other kids their age. I'm sure when they go off to college they won't either.

Yup, totally agree. I homeschool my 3 girls and they don't have any social problems! We are part of a field trip coop, art classes, piano not to mention that all 3 are in ballet several days a week. It's not total seclusion.

I think some people (not based on this thread) assume that if you homeschool, your kids must have trouble socializing. That couldn't be farther from the truth. Case in point...I was in public school my whole life and was terribly shy. Seriously, in grade school if someone looked at me wrong I would cry! It had more to do with my personality (shy, timid) than whether or not I was socializing properly. My girls are the complete opposite of me and talk to anyone and everyone that will listen to them! They have lots of neighborhood friends as well as homeschool and ballet friends. Come to think of it, my youngest DD's ballet teacher hinted that my daughter is a wee bit too social in class!

I think this is a fabulous thread though because it was such a great question that received wonderful responses. A homeschooled child probably does do more independant study which is very similiar to college work. I too am hoping my kids go to college in-state, like another poster said, it's cheaper and they're closer to home!

 

[barkley]

i think some people make assumptions about homeschooled kids because unless they know some personaly they only hear on the news about the EXTREME isolationist types.

i think like anything else, it depends on the kid. some adjust well to college, some don't.

we have family members who homeschooled their kids for years. one of the kids did well in college and seemed to adapt allright, the other 2 siblings did'nt. i think with the 2 that did'nt it was a mix of lack of socialization skills, and the manner in which their learning style developed. neither ever felt comfortable in groups of people (other than those they were long term familiar with like their homeschool friends and church members) so they did'nt like the 'feel' of campus life or of being in a classroom with large groups. they also had a hard time adjusting to the lecture style of most college classes-they were taught in a very conversational manner with give and take on the part of student/parent-teacher and were used to being able to what can best be described as learn a subject through discussion. they also tried on-line classes but again, b/c it was'nt a discussion back and forth type of learning model they found it was'nt for them.

NOW-this sounds odd, but my kids attend school WITH some homeschoolers. one of the ways you can legaly homeschool in our state is to affiliate with an existing private school so there are some homeschool families that affiliate with ours. the homeschooler's use the same curriculum, and when the curriculum calls for certain things that are better suited to a brick and morter school (like science fairs) the homeschooler's join in. the homeschooled kids are also always notified when field trips are happening (and the kids have lots) so that they can participate as well. this seems to work out well for everyone, and it's interesting to watch-everyyear we get someone who never dreamed of homeschooling being exposed to it's benefits and opting to try it, while one of the homeschool families inevitably decides to opt into the school full time.

 

[Rora]

My DFi's sister is a senior in High School this year. She's been home schooled for 2 years and has developed a really intense bond with her mother- they are NEVER apart. BUT, she was just accepted to a school on the East Coast (they live in the West) and she is going.

It will be interesting to see how she adjusts. I can only imagine that it's a very tough transition.

 

[laurie31]

Well, today I got an email from DD's art history teacher and I thought of this thread.

(she's taking this class, along with 3 others, from our group co-op)

The teacher emailed us the syllabus for the quarter and the list of essay topics. My first thought was this is so much more like what would happen in a college setting, although I know high school teachers can do this as well, so I thought I'd come here with a concrete example.

Here's an example, just to satisy the curiosity of those wondering what homeschooling can be like.

Essay topics

51. Why was art a necessity for prehistoric people? What human need did prehistoric art fulfill?

52. Describe at least three of the possible purposes that prehistoric art may have had. Give the rationale as to why each has been considered and defend the logic of at least one.

53. How might the name an object has been given, such as the Woman from Willendorf, alter the way we understand it?

54. What was the purpose of Paleolithic cave painting? Give the rationale for your answer.

55. Describe the images in the prehistoric painting, Bird-Headed Man with Bison, and discuss its meaning and significance.

56. How were prehistoric paintings made?

57. What is the relationship that exists between the subject matter in Upper Paleolithic cave paintings and the diet of the people who made them? How has this affected theories about the paintings’ purpose and meaning?

58. Describe Stonehenge and discuss its purpose and meaning.

I don't structure how she prepares for the classes she takes from co-op for her, meaning she has to look at this and budget her own time to read the chapter, answer the questions, and write the essays. I will proof-read them for her if she asks, but I don't if she doesn't. She is learning time-management skills as well as how to study independently.

 

[Momvic5]

I read the question to my 8th grade son who is homeschooled...his reply.....

"No need to worry, Mom...I am sure that after 4 more years of living at home, I will be more than ready to go away for college. " Ha!

Yes, homeschooled kids go away for college. Going away for college is an adjustment for any student. Many times it is a student's first experience with living away from home whether they are homeschooled or not. My brothers and I went to public schools throughout our school years, and all three of us went away for college. Two of us adjusted fine, and one of us did not. I never once considered our successes or failures to be a result of our public school socialization experiences.

 

[kristilew]

fwiw: I think choosing a college that's a good fit for the student is the most important thing. How they were schooled up until then hardly matters, as there is such a wide range of experiences in most college freshman populations.

I do think a good summer camp experience in the younger years can make any kid ready for living away from home.

 

[ZephyrHawk]

I know only one homeschooled kid (well, he's 32 now) who I met in college. Classes, he had no problem with (he's already been taking college level courses at the local community college). Living on his own he had no problem with. Girls were...well, an issue. But when are they not?

However, he's against homechooling his own kids. He feels that it did not emotionally prepare him for the world. Oh sure, he made friends right off the bat, then he went through his pre-teen phase and gave up all his old friends for new "cooler" friends, then he went through his high school phase where he realized that being cool was not the be all end all and went back to his old friends. He states that by missing out on these traditional times of social interaction in his life he is now at the same social/emotional level as his wife...who is about 12 years his junior.

Perhaps he was an "extreme" isolationist type, I don't know. I wasn't around at that point of his life, only the aftermath. His parents were very religious and he was brought up with some odd views. However, they always seemed like nice friendly people to me.

 

[ladycollector]

I know only one homeschooled kid (well, he's 32 now) who I met in college. Classes, he had no problem with (he's already been taking college level courses at the local community college). Living on his own he had no problem with. Girls were...well, an issue. But when are they not?

However, he's against homechooling his own kids. He feels that it did not emotionally prepare him for the world. Oh sure, he made friends right off the bat, then he went through his pre-teen phase and gave up all his old friends for new "cooler" friends, then he went through his high school phase where he realized that being cool was not the be all end all and went back to his old friends. He states that by missing out on these traditional times of social interaction in his life he is now at the same social/emotional level as his wife...who is about 12 years his junior.

Perhaps he was an "extreme" isolationist type, I don't know. I wasn't around at that point of his life, only the aftermath. His parents were very religious and he was brought up with some odd views. However, they always seemed like nice friendly people to me.

See, I've had a completely opposite experience. I always feel much older than I am, I socialize much better with older people, and I'm 20. This doesn't mean I don't socialize with people my age - I do. I am still a 20yo college kid, but I really don't see myself marrying a guy my age, we're just on total different wavelengths.

ETA: Which goes to show people are going to have all different sorts of experiences- I don't think it necessarily matters whether you were home schooled or attended public school.

 

[Pigeon]

I'm faculty at a university. I encounter lots of students who've been homeschooled. Some have problems adjusting and some take to it like a duck to water, just like their traditionally-schooled peers.