Homeschool Chat Part III

[chris31997]

We held our dd's homeschool graduation over the weekend. We had an open house with a mini-recital/ceremony. We made it! In just two months we'll be driving several states away to take her to college. I am confident that she will be able to thrive there.

Just sharing to encourage everyone. You can do this, moms!

Congrats!!!!!

 

[CharmingElla]

Hi everyone! I'm new here. I have a 20 mo old and I've been looking forward to homeschooling her since she was a newborn.

I have a question, though. I have a supportive husband, but everyone else really downs homeschooling. Like today I had a friend, who works in a corp. office of a well know company, tell me that a girl came in for an interview and it was the worse interview and they think it was because she was homeschooled. She also thinks kids really need that everyday social interaction with other children. I also hear from a lot of other people the same things. It really bums me because I wanted to really do it and now I feel like I might be failing as a mom because I want to do it.

Any advice??

 

[chris31997]

Hi everyone! I'm new here. I have a 20 mo old and I've been looking forward to homeschooling her since she was a newborn.

I have a question, though. I have a supportive husband, but everyone else really downs homeschooling. Like today I had a friend, who works in a corp. office of a well know company, tell me that a girl came in for an interview and it was the worse interview and they think it was because she was homeschooled. She also thinks kids really need that everyday social interaction with other children. I also hear from a lot of other people the same things. It really bums me because I wanted to really do it and now I feel like I might be failing as a mom because I want to do it.

Any advice??

Read above about social interaction. Homeschool kids generally are some of the best at all interactions socially because they have been exposed to lots of differant things/social settings.

I would have a plan for social interaction. Then you tell people, "Hey, we will be doing X,Y,Z and my child will be learning to handle themselves with children from ages 0-16 and with adults. Where do they get that in a school setting when they have to sit there and be quiet for 8 hrs a day?" I would also back off the telling people right now that you are homeschooling. They see a baby/toddler and they are not soo sure

As for your girlfriend: They "think" she was homeschooled. You are interviewing someone for a job, don't you want to know what their schooling is? Whoever is interviewing should know what the schooling is, I would think. Even if they trully did not know, it is possible. There are the "bookworms" who are not social people and they would not be social in a school setting either. Mute point. Interviews can be nerve wrecking, unless you are prepped and prepared for it, you can blow it.


This is something you can totally do.

 

[bumbershoot]

Like today I had a friend, who works in a corp. office of a well know company, tell me that a girl came in for an interview and it was the worse interview and they think it was because she was homeschooled. She also thinks kids really need that everyday social interaction with other children.

I was school-schooled and I once CRIED during an interview. what would they blame that on?

Also, was the interview done by people of the exact same age or grade group? Because that's the social interaction you get in school. Oh, except "school is not for socializing!" as I heard ALL the time when IN school.

School is a good place to meet people who will be your friends, but the social process should be happening outside of school (or your school has questionable policies). We use the Y for friends, personally. And just about every other nice talkative person we meet in a day.

In all likelihood your child will have job interviews with people older than her. So homeschooling will be good for that different-age/level interaction, and for the education of course.

Lastly...my brother had only met kids who were very sheltered, extremely family based, and homeschooled He blamed the social awkwardness on the homeschool part. Then he met other homeschooled kids and realized that there are other factors. What's funny is that I'm really socially awkward, but my brother forgot about that, while we were schooled very much the same way!

 

[Lisa71]

I do not make decisions for other families but no one is an expert on everything and it is not just the socialization but seeing people from other backgrounds, cultures, religions, financial circumstances, that is part of school. You cannot recreate it other ways. Kids need teachers that are not their parents.

 

[DisneyMom5]

I do not make decisions for other families but no one is an expert on everything and it is not just the socialization but seeing people from other backgrounds, cultures, religions, financial circumstances, that is part of school. You cannot recreate it other ways. Kids need teachers that are not their parents.

First of all...why are you posting this on a homeschooling thread full of homeschoolers? Do you think we will say "Oh, my, I never thought of that. This person that does not homeschool has just opened my eyes to my foolishness!"

Secondly...do you find that most public or private schools are that varied in culture and ethnicities?
Where I live, if my kids attended public school, they still would be surrounded by kids that look and live much like they do.

What kids need are teachers that are invested in them, as well as parents who are highly involved in their schooling and other activities. This can be in any school, including (and especially) homeschool.

 

[gerberdaisy1234]

I do not make decisions for other families but no one is an expert on everything and it is not just the socialization but seeing people from other backgrounds, cultures, religions, financial circumstances, that is part of school. You cannot recreate it other ways. Kids need teachers that are not their parents.

Our children, as well as many other homeschooled children, spend time every day with people of different backgrounds, cultures, races, religions, financial circumstances, varying physical and mental abilities, different ages. We don't need to recreate- it has already been created all around us. In our neighborhood, library, YMCA, parks and recreation activities, nursing homes, grocery store, mall, museums, national, state and local parks, ice skating rink, places of worship, restaurants, 5k races, karate, art classes, drama classes, choir, language classes...Everywhere we go my children engage in conversations with people of all ages, race, religions, genders, economic groups, abilities, cultures. Yes, we actually talk to people in all these places. We have met so many amazing people. Most we never see again but I am so glad we didn't miss that chance.

I taught in public schools for ten years not to mention all the years I attended. I watched as students tend to group themselves together in like groups. (Not all of course) I am very thankful that my children's circle of friends is very unique and varied (and includes many non homeschoolers-we are not isolated)

"It takes a village to raise a child." Trust me, even though we are our children's primary teachers, most homeschoolers know the value of every teachable moment and the life lessons that come from the others in our "village." And this is the same feeling of many parents that send their children to public or private schools, they just go about it a different way.


Sent from my iPhone using DISBoards

 

[chris31997]

I do not make decisions for other families but no one is an expert on everything and it is not just the socialization but seeing people from other backgrounds, cultures, religions, financial circumstances, that is part of school. You cannot recreate it other ways. Kids need teachers that are not their parents.

Do claim to be an expert on everything, just my kids

You want me to expose my children to people of differant religons, financial backgrounds, cultures and backgrounds.

Great!!! So do I. I want them to do that they are not the only people out there. I want them to know that there are people in the world that have it worse than them. BUT I want them to explore and pursue things that they want.

For example, DD loves ballet and classical music. She was able to help teach/mentor little kids who were begin in ballet. Actually, she loves dance. She also learned hula. She was privilaged enough to have an awsome hula instructor who had competed in the Merry Monarch Festival. She also got to learn some basic Hawaiian language.

MIL is German with family still there. Talk about getting exposed to a differant way of thinking. Both kids love to talk and see their Oma. Both kids have gone to Germany and love differant things about Germany. Their Mother,me, is into researching her family roots. So, they have found it fun to look into that. Learned that they are from all over the world, but they love knowing that they have Cherokee in them.

Dad is active duty. Semper FI. We have been privilaged to live in several States and now Overseas. My kids have helped with disaster relief. They have seen kids from ALL over the world. One Marine working with my Hubby is from Nigeria working on his Naturalization. His Family homeschools. We are currently in the process of studing and learning all we can about our host nation Japan.

Do all homeschoolers do this, no. Should all homeschoolers do this, no. This works for our family. We can customize our schooling to our kids. It is not one size fits all.

 

[Mommaof3]

I do not make decisions for other families but no one is an expert on everything and it is not just the socialization but seeing people from other backgrounds, cultures, religions, financial circumstances, that is part of school. You cannot recreate it other ways. Kids need teachers that are not their parents.

I have been associated with homeschooling for over 20 years. All 3 of my children were mainly homeschooled. They did have some private and some public schooling. For me, the "what about socialization" question was the most asked. I learned to answer it, but I hate the question. I am a teacher by profession. I have taught in public school. I know what school is about. It is about learning. Children do receive a certain type of socialization at school. It mainly involves learning to get along with children very close to their exact age. It also involves children loosely similar to their basic culture and background as most public schools pull from neighborhoods. (notice loosely and basic, not exact) I found in our homeschooling experience that our socialization was broader than what my children would have gotten in school. I find it odd that no one ever asks me about learning. I don't ever recall learning how to "socialize" children when I was in college. I was taught how to teach and what to teach. Are social aspects of a child important? Yes! But for me, broader was better. And it is not the ONLY thing about schooling. Not for me.
I am not an expert on everything. Never claimed to be. But I hired tutors, put my children in groups and classes, took my children to collectors, a holocaust victim, museums, etc.........you get the picture. There are so many ways to learn besides a room with a classic teacher and a book.

I didn't want to recreate school. I wanted to teach my children to love learning and to live a lifestyle of always learning something new. For us, it was the ultimate way to learn about the diversity in the world. I think sometimes you have to set out of the "box" to see that you were in a "box" in the first place. For us, coming home released us to be free to move about more.

Climbing off my box now! Wait! One more thing.......My son aced his interview with one of the top 4 accounting firms in the country and will be starting that internship soon. So, yes, homeschooled children can interview appropriately. Now I am off my box for sure!

 

[Gitts2008]

I do not make decisions for other families but no one is an expert on everything and it is not just the socialization but seeing people from other backgrounds, cultures, religions, financial circumstances, that is part of school. You cannot recreate it other ways. Kids need teachers that are not their parents.

Lisa everyone who interacts with my child teaches her something. It could be negative or positive. Every child is different and has different needs.

You're last statement is very close minded.

 

[disneybound2010]

Hi, Everyone. I hope it's ok to jump in here. We pulled DS out of public school in March. He was unhappy, extremely bored, and the school itself had some major safety issues. His teacher was and still is 100% behind us on the decision. Although he is technically going into the 2nd grade, he is working on a 3rd grade level in most subjects. Reading is on par with a 4th grader. Unfortunately, the school would not allow him to work to his potential as they insisted all students must stay on the same page.

Since March, there has been a huge change in how he looks at school and is excited to learn(we are doing year round schooling.) He actually begs to do work We have a such a good group of friends and he is involved in multiple activities so he is definitely still getting the interaction and socialization everyone seems so worried about. My only regret is that we did not do this from the very beginning. So far, it has been an amazing experience for all of us

 

[DisneyMom5]

I didn't want to recreate school. I wanted to teach my children to love learning and to live a lifestyle of always learning something new. For us, it was the ultimate way to learn about the diversity in the world. I think sometimes you have to set out of the "box" to see that you were in a "box" in the first place. For us, coming home released us to be free to move about more.

Beautiful!

 

[chris31997]

Climbing off my box now! Wait! One more thing.......My son aced his interview with one of the top 4 accounting firms in the country and will be starting that internship soon. So, yes, homeschooled children can interview appropriately. Now I am off my box for sure!

Congrats to your son and your family!!!!

 

[Nanu57v]

Hi, Everyone. I hope it's ok to jump in here. We pulled DS out of public school in March. He was unhappy, extremely bored, and the school itself had some major safety issues. His teacher was and still is 100% behind us on the decision. Although he is technically going into the 2nd grade, he is working on a 3rd grade level in most subjects. Reading is on par with a 4th grader. Unfortunately, the school would not allow him to work to his potential as they insisted all students must stay on the same page.

Since March, there has been a huge change in how he looks at school and is excited to learn(we are doing year round schooling.) He actually begs to do work We have a such a good group of friends and he is involved in multiple activities so he is definitely still getting the interaction and socialization everyone seems so worried about. My only regret is that we did not do this from the very beginning. So far, it has been an amazing experience for all of us

Sounds wonderful! Keep the ball rolling!

 

[bumbershoot]

I know what school is about. It is about learning. Children do receive a certain type of socialization at school. It mainly involves learning to get along with children very close to their exact age. It also involves children loosely similar to their basic culture and background as most public schools pull from neighborhoods.

****
I find it odd that no one ever asks me about learning. I don't ever recall learning how to "socialize" children when I was in college. I was taught how to teach and what to teach.

We have a neighbor who was in the field of education for his career, and he has nothing but good things to say about my son and his apparent intelligence. It's pretty neat. And he's the only one who ever talks about learning.

And I love how you mention you never were taught hot to socialize kids. Of course, it's because kids do that on their own, and IMO it's best done outside of school! School is an easy conduit for friends, and it's when you're with friends that you learn how to interact with other people of your age (and it's when you're in the world that you learn how to be a social person and decent citizen).

I do not make decisions for other families but no one is an expert on everything and it is not just the socialization but seeing people from other backgrounds, cultures, religions, financial circumstances, that is part of school. You cannot recreate it other ways. Kids need teachers that are not their parents.

I went to school with two groups; rich and poor. For the most part, they didn't mix. I had a few friends who were definitely wealthy, but for the most part those were the "popular" kids and they stuck together. And almost all of the people in my group were of ONE religion. Hardly diverse.

And NONE of that ever came up *during classtime*, because classtime is for learning! 7 minute passing periods and 40 minute lunchtimes were the frenzied talking times.


Kids HAVE teachers that are not their parents; it's called the world. It's also called gymnastics teachers, dance teachers, etc.

But I don't know why you think they *need* them.

 

[jahber]

I do not make decisions for other families but no one is an expert on everything and it is not just the socialization but seeing people from other backgrounds, cultures, religions, financial circumstances, that is part of school. You cannot recreate it other ways. Kids need teachers that are not their parents.

I for one am SO GLAD I can't recreate what happens in schools at home! Lord willing, we will never have a kid bullied, threatened with a gun, duct-taped to a chair (as happened here in Fl), made to feel stupid by standardized test scores, told not to draw on the back of their paper (gasp!), or belittled by a teacher in our home. It may happen in the outside world, but why is it absolutely necessary for the formation of an adult to be exposed to these things? Obviously it's not.

Now, I know this poster most likely dropped this little gem and fled, but I take it as an opportunity to encourage one another and remind each other WHY we homeschool. It's because we love our kids and believe that parents DO know what's best for their own children...not a stranger in another part of the state or country who has never even seen our children.

 

[spectrecat]

Kids need teachers that are not their parents.

Why?

I know my kids better than anyone, and between church activities, horseback riding, sports, martial arts, choir, co-op, etc, I think they receive plenty of instruction from other trusted adults.

Hi! Guess I should introduce myself.

We will be entering our third year of homeschool this (late) summer/fall. We sort of school year 'round, though we've taken most of June off for summer activities.

 

[McDonald5]

I for one am SO GLAD I can't recreate what happens in schools at home! Lord willing, we will never have a kid bullied, threatened with a gun, duct-taped to a chair (as happened here in Fl), made to feel stupid by standardized test scores, told not to draw on the back of their paper (gasp!), or belittled by a teacher in our home. It may happen in the outside world, but why is it absolutely necessary for the formation of an adult to be exposed to these things? Obviously it's not.

Now, I know this poster most likely dropped this little gem and fled, but I take it as an opportunity to encourage one another and remind each other WHY we homeschool. It's because we love our kids and believe that parents DO know what's best for their own children...not a stranger in another part of the state or country who has never even seen our children.

THIS, exactly! Love your comment!

This past year (we will be homeschooling for the first time this coming school year) I went to my Kindergarteners parent teacher conference and was told that the reason she had some things marked off were:
1. She wasn't coloring things "realistic" colors.
2. She didn't include every body part in her drawings of people (they were marked off if they didn't have hands, a neck, ears, a nose, whatever)

I don't know, but I'd like to live in a world where 5 year olds could still color a purple tree with an orange sky and maybe draw their family however they want. Must we crush creativity so early in an effort to make them all fit into their appropriate boxes?

 

[eisforpants]

^^^ This! My father one time got onto my son for not coloring inside the lines. I just rolled my eyes and was like where in the rules of life does it say you have to stay in the lines. He smiled at me and said apple doesn't fall from the tree. I could never get YOU to color inside the lines either.

 

[jahber]

^^^ This! My father one time got onto my son for not coloring inside the lines. I just rolled my eyes and was like where in the rules of life does it say you have to stay in the lines. He smiled at me and said apple doesn't fall from the tree. I could never get YOU to color inside the lines either.

I STILL find myself wanting to "correct" my 9yo daughter when she colors, say, Moses' hair green and his skin yellow. But it makes art personal for her, instead of an exercise in duplicating someone else's work. It's not easy for me to let go of a lifetime of conformity! And my son spells his spelling words while jumping from couch to couch. It's not at all the life I envisioned when we started this journey, but it's certainly never boring!