Help me win a battle against the family to stay on site!

[Cheburashka]

When you're talking about other people's money, it isn't right to try to get them to spend a lot more than they're comfortable with. Let them stay offsite without arguing with them. It's fine to mention the perks of staying onsite, but beyond sharing that information, don't try to persuade them to change their minds.

Stay onsite with your family, and meet up with them at the parks. Disney is so overpriced right now (record high costs combined with record low perks & services), that only die-hard fans can't see the benefit of staying at a high-quality offsite location instead. Nothing wrong with being a diehard fan at all (we'll stay onsite in December), but you can't expect multiple families to also be the same way.

If you were to somehow talk them into it, they might end up resenting you afterwards for wasting a substantial amount of their money. Lingering bad feelings between family members isn't worth getting everyone to stay at the same resort on vacation. A bit of space between you each day might make for less friction during the trip, anyway.

The other viable option is for you to cover the extra $2,000 per family, but I gather that is not something you wish to do.

 

[DeEtte Brower]

Traveling down to Disney with 4 families a total of 18 of us. My wife and I have been before but everyone else has never been to Florida. I have been managing everything and have everyone booked at Wilderness Lodge (mid-October) with four park days. However, everyone is starting to push back and ask why we don't just rent a house as this will save about $2000.00 a family. The last time I went was in 2012 and remember how magical it was staying at the wilderness lodge getting the boat to the park, Fast passes ( I know they are gone right now), and extra hours. I want all the kids to experience the same thing, but the only thing I can sell on right now is the potential for magic extra hours. They are saying with the money we save we can go to the beach, universal, have a private pool and a lot more room. Any suggestions on what I can counter with or am I just being stubborn at the magic will still be there if we rent a house?

I think the transportation on-site makes it worth it. We are going with a large group next summer and I could not imagine trying to get them all into cars and get to the parks together. Also, we will have kids of different ages and parties with different interests. Staying onsite makes it easier to be together for some shared experiences but also gives us the option to go our own ways some. I feel like this will not force anyone to stay at a park longer than they want or leave anyone stranded if others want to leave.

 

[MomOTwins]

I mean they're not wrong. Why do you all need to stay in the same accommodations? Let them rent a house offsite and meet up for meals and park time. Unless you're willing to foot the bill for everyone to stay onsite.

This exactly. They should be allowed to rent a house if they want to. You should be allowed to stay onsite and enjoy your extra magic hours and convenient parks transportation (a BIG benefit in what will probably be the busiest October in the history of WDW) and then meet up and go about your days together at the parks. If they want to go to the beach for a day, let them go to the beach and Universal and you can join them if you want to--or just hang back and have a quiet resort day (or add a day to your park tickets) at WDW! You can go or stay as you please--staying onsite doesn't make you some sort of prisoner and prevent you from doing any of those things.

Now if they're insisting you pay one fourth of the house and have to stay with them, that's totally unreasonable (just like to be fair, it's a little unreasonable to expect them all to foot the bill for WL if they don't want to.

The only thing that is not entirely clear to me from this post is how your own family feels about it. Would they rather be with the other three families or stay at WL? If your wife and kids are leaning toward the private house, then you've simply been outvoted.

 

[mmmhf]

I have stayed both on-site and off site multiple times. I have to side with your family on this one. I can’t justify the cost of on-site right now. We always drive a car anyway so even transportation isn’t appealing to us. With the money we are saving, we are adding on universal and maybe Discovery Cove. Unless FP is released and tied to an on-site stay, it just isn’t worth it to me. We’ve stayed at Wyndham bonnet creek and we are closer to most of the parks than when staying value. Plus we can get 9 nights for $1500 in a 2 bedroom condo.

 

[SG131]

The only thing that is not entirely clear to me from this post is how your own family feels about it. Would they rather be with the other three families or stay at WL? If your wife and kids are leaning toward the private house, then you've simply been outvoted.

This. I think if the rest of the family rents a house and OP kids are at the resort alone, they potentially will miss out on a lot of bonding time. For some families, missing out on a little bonding time is a good thing. For some its missing out on the little things that may be talked about at family functions for the next 10 years.

 

[brockash]

Traveling down to Disney with 4 families a total of 18 of us. My wife and I have been before but everyone else has never been to Florida. I have been managing everything and have everyone booked at Wilderness Lodge (mid-October) with four park days. However, everyone is starting to push back and ask why we don't just rent a house as this will save about $2000.00 a family. The last time I went was in 2012 and remember how magical it was staying at the wilderness lodge getting the boat to the park, Fast passes ( I know they are gone right now), and extra hours. I want all the kids to experience the same thing, but the only thing I can sell on right now is the potential for magic extra hours. They are saying with the money we save we can go to the beach, universal, have a private pool and a lot more room. Any suggestions on what I can counter with or am I just being stubborn at the magic will still be there if we rent a house?

Honestly, there just isn't much of a reason or perks to spend the kind of money on Disney resorts right now. There's really no benefit. Maybe if you're flying and going this yr, you could try to counter with magical express...not needing to rent vehicles etc?...I feel like it's not really a strong argument, especially since luggage service is no longer part of the deal, but that'd the only thing I could think of. $2000/family is a REALLY large chunk of change, plus you'll have more space etc. Good luck.

Fastpass shouldn't even be a discussion at this point. Disney has given no indication that it'll be back anytime soon, so no reason to discuss that.

 

[Cj2017]

Wow, I didn't expect so many replies and will try to answer back to everyone. A couple of points I would make is

1. The reason for the trip is that we have about 6 Juniors, and 2 Sophomores (nieces, nephews, and my daughter) going and this is our last vacation with them before they graduate next year and are off to college. The point of this trip is to be together as much as possible and all the adults asked me to take on planning this trip since I have done it for our other vacations to Mexico, California, and Hawaii (which I don't mind at all). They aren't really mad or pushing back saying they can't afford it the spark that started the debate was my sister in law was listing to yesterdays dis unplugged episode with me in the car and she lightly asked in the group chat last night "Are you sure it worth it to stay at Disney?" If I really push back and say yes I'm sure it will be the end of it. I guess what's really bothering me is I know how much fun I had back on my first trip but it's really messing with my head about the current state of Disney resort perks and if I'm making the right decision.

2. The 2k savings is already taking into consideration each family having their own rental car for the trip. I had already told each family that there will be a specific time we need to meet in the lobby each park day and if they aren't there in time we are leaving them and they catch up with us in the park. which they all agreed to so I'm thinking it would play the same way at the rental house since each family will have their own car.

3. I'm pretty close to every one of my family's financial situation and I know they have the money and they wouldn't commit to this if they didn't, but I know with college coming up and everything a couple of them could use the 2k.

It just sucks because I can't get it out of my head that this won't be amazing unless we stay on-site and the decision is all on me

 

[dez1978]

Wow, I didn't expect so many replies and will try to answer back to everyone. A couple of points I would make is

1. The reason for the trip is that we have about 6 Juniors, and 2 Sophomores (nieces, nephews, and my daughter) going and this is our last vacation with them before they graduate next year and are off to college. The point of this trip is to be together as much as possible and all the adults asked me to take on planning this trip since I have done it for our other vacations to Mexico, California, and Hawaii (which I don't mind at all). They aren't really mad or pushing back saying they can't afford it the spark that started the debate was my sister in law was listing to yesterdays dis unplugged episode with me in the car and she lightly asked in the group chat last night "Are you sure it worth it to stay at Disney?" If I really push back and say yes I'm sure it will be the end of it. I guess what's really bothering me is I know how much fun I had back on my first trip but it's really messing with my head about the current state of Disney resort perks and if I'm making the right decision.

2. The 2k savings is already taking into consideration each family having their own rental car for the trip. I had already told each family that there will be a specific time we need to meet in the lobby each park day and if they aren't there in time we are leaving them and they catch up with us in the park. which they all agreed to so I'm thinking it would play the same way at the rental house since each family will have their own car.

3. I'm pretty close to every one of my family's financial situation and I know they have the money and they wouldn't commit to this if they didn't, but I know with college coming up and everything a couple of them could use the 2k.

It just sucks because I can't get it out of my head that this won't be amazing unless we stay on-site and the decision is all on me

I'd take a vote and make every single one of the 18 cast a vote. OR at the very least all the paying adults. Majority wins. Then it's not all on you.

 

[MICKIMINI]

I agree with OP's. Stay at WL with your family and let the rest of the family make their own reservations on site or off.

Right now, rental cars are crazy high (they'll need several vans), not to mention "commuting" to WDW everyday, forget the afternoon breaks and going in for a few hours in the evening. Most people can't wrap their heads around the fact that WDW is 40 square miles of property and it could take an hour or more to actually get into a park. Trying to convince someone that hasn't been of the value and "magic" of staying onsite probably isn't worth the aggravation.

We've entertained many times in 3 BR Grand Villas at OKW and have a party of six in a 2 BR Lock Off and extra Studio for Halloween and F & W. Everyone has privacy and the lock off is locked! We do use the kitchen for at least one sit down breakfast and always have grab and go (fruit, granola bars and bottled drinks) available. We may do carry out to set out on the buffet for one easy meal (a rainy night for example). Otherwise, we schedule a couple park days (doesn't mean the entire day) which may be early morning, then lunch and go our separate ways or we do our own thing during the day and meet at EPCOT for dinner. In the past we tried to do everything together and it just wasn't any fun, honestly.

Best case scenario IMO is for the other families to stay at a Moderate on property for the transportation and proximity and privacy. We don't get the 3 BR's at OKW as it is just too much "togetherness" for us! Good luck with your planning!!

 

[meliscan]

Have you looked into renting DVC points? That can lower your price point by quiet a bit per night. As other posters have said when you have a house who will cook and clean the house? Do you want to do that on vacation? Have you looked at rentals cars? Those prices are crazy High as a lot of companies sold off their fleet during covid. You have to pay to park at the parks and hotels now.

I am partial to on-site as you spend so much time and money getting to the parks from off-site. Also on-site you can have more freedom to come and go. It would be hard to coordinate for 18 people. Best of luck and I hope you all have a great vacation.

 

[kylenne]

Wow, I didn't expect so many replies and will try to answer back to everyone. A couple of points I would make is

1. The reason for the trip is that we have about 6 Juniors, and 2 Sophomores (nieces, nephews, and my daughter) going and this is our last vacation with them before they graduate next year and are off to college. The point of this trip is to be together as much as possible and all the adults asked me to take on planning this trip since I have done it for our other vacations to Mexico, California, and Hawaii (which I don't mind at all). They aren't really mad or pushing back saying they can't afford it the spark that started the debate was my sister in law was listing to yesterdays dis unplugged episode with me in the car and she lightly asked in the group chat last night "Are you sure it worth it to stay at Disney?" If I really push back and say yes I'm sure it will be the end of it. I guess what's really bothering me is I know how much fun I had back on my first trip but it's really messing with my head about the current state of Disney resort perks and if I'm making the right decision.

2. The 2k savings is already taking into consideration each family having their own rental car for the trip. I had already told each family that there will be a specific time we need to meet in the lobby each park day and if they aren't there in time we are leaving them and they catch up with us in the park. which they all agreed to so I'm thinking it would play the same way at the rental house since each family will have their own car.

Thanks for the additional info.

You really, really need to dial down the expectations imo. Your first trip, pre-covid, is absolutely not going to be the same experience a first timer has right now. That's before considering the differences between going in a small family group vs. a huge one. It's not to say you can't have a wonderful time right now--I had the time of my life on my 2 recent trips this summer--but it requires a lot of patience. Read the "Here Now and Back Again" thread in TPAS to get a clear view of what the parks are like right now. And as much as I'm an onsite diehard who would never stay any more offsite than like, Swan or Dolphin, I can't in good conscience answer that "is it worth it to stay at Disney" question with "yes" to anyone who doesn't already hardcore value the bubble like I do. Early entry is definitely going to be a game changer and will potentially really hinder offsite guests, but there are offsite hotels that will offer the benefit at substantially lower cost and more bang for the buck. "Magic" is in the eye of the beholder and can't be explained to people or quantified to them. There is magic everywhere and you don't always have to pay through the nose for it.

And to put it bluntly, I still think it's crazy trying to be together "as much as possible". There is such a thing as too much togetherness even on vacation and after a while it gets very old very quickly. Especially with teenagers. I know it's not what you want to hear but it's the honest truth. Even families full of extroverts who get along very well need time and space to decompress away from each other. Particularly somewhere like Disney with constant stimuli and potential stressors. And no group that big will have the same priorities and interests in a place like WDW with so many varied things to do. Trying to please that many people at once is going to end up with nobody pleased. Bake in some designated time for shared activities with the whole group, like meal times, or resort activities--dinner is good for this because you can talk about what you did. But expecting 18 people to be joined at the hip is not the move and setting everyone up for frustration and disappointment.

 

[Cj2017]

Have you looked into renting DVC points? That can lower your price point by quiet a bit per night. As other posters have said when you have a house who will cook and clean the house? Do you want to do that on vacation? Have you looked at rentals cars? Those prices are crazy High as a lot of companies sold off their fleet during covid. You have to pay to park at the parks and hotels now.

I am partial to on-site as you spend so much time and money getting to the parks from off-site. Also on-site you can have more freedom to come and go. It would be hard to coordinate for 18 people. Best of luck and I hope you all have a great vacation.

Since we are going in early October DVC is out of the question. We plan on still eating out and not cooking and as for cleaning I was under the impression that there would be no housekeeping either at Disney.

 

[Cj2017]

Thanks for the additional info.

You really, really need to dial down the expectations imo. Your first trip, pre-covid, is absolutely not going to be the same experience a first timer has right now. That's before considering the differences between going in a small family group vs. a huge one. It's not to say you can't have a wonderful time right now--I had the time of my life on my 2 recent trips this summer--but it requires a lot of patience. Read the "Here Now and Back Again" thread in TPAS to get a clear view of what the parks are like right now. And as much as I'm an onsite diehard who would never stay any more offsite than like, Swan or Dolphin, I can't in good conscience answer that "is it worth it to stay at Disney" question with "yes" to anyone who doesn't already hardcore value the bubble like I do. Early entry is definitely going to be a game changer and will potentially really hinder offsite guests, but there are offsite hotels that will offer the benefit at substantially lower cost and more bang for the buck. "Magic" is in the eye of the beholder and can't be explained to people or quantified to them. There is magic everywhere and you don't always have to pay through the nose for it.

And to put it bluntly, I still think it's crazy trying to be together "as much as possible". There is such a thing as too much togetherness even on vacation and after a while it gets very old very quickly. Especially with teenagers. I know it's not what you want to hear but it's the honest truth. Even families full of extroverts who get along very well need time and space to decompress away from each other. Particularly somewhere like Disney with constant stimuli and potential stressors. And no group that big will have the same priorities and interests in a place like WDW with so many varied things to do. Trying to please that many people at once is going to end up with nobody pleased. Bake in some designated time for shared activities with the whole group, like meal times, or resort activities--dinner is good for this because you can talk about what you did. But expecting 18 people to be joined at the hip is not the move and setting everyone up for frustration and disappointment.

I'm going in thinking we will be together the whole time since we have done it at Disneyland/DCA before, but if we don't so be it. The way I have it set up now is I have my touring plan for each park and they are more than welcome to join (which they all want to) but they can go off on their own if they like which is the only thing that has me iffy about the house because everyone is under one roof versus separate rooms for each family.

 

[Eastern]

Since cost is an issue I would price out a moderate resort instead of WL. Definitely do not plan too much together. Don't even meet in the lobby, meet in the parks.

Your teens are going to want to hang out with each other, and Disney is the best place to let them go off and be 'on their own'. In this case the on-site transportation is a big plus vs having to drive in from offsite. The teens could meet up wherever and you don't have to worry about it.

I would only schedule one TS meal together max. The rest should be 'on your own'. Otherwise it just gets too hard rounding everyone up.

Maybe last time you went when your kids were small? or at least younger. Their nearly adults now and are going to want to vacation differently, maybe without the togetherness the parents are hoping for.

Or maybe your teens want to be with everyone 24/7 so in that case disregard all this.

 

[BrotherCraig]

I have to side with the rest of the family here. We love staying off site and getting a house or a bunch of condos is way cheaper and nice all around. We stay onsite every now and then but with a group that size --- go the route of the condo or house rental. Save money, have a great time. I can think of a lot of things to do with that extra money that would be saved.

 

[Akck]

Don’t discount the extra hours at night. While we don’t know how Disney will work it, extra hours at night for deluxe resort guests may be well worth it with lower number of guests at the park. It could be similar to the after dark ticketed events. We attended one at AK and the rides were basically walk on. The wait was mostly how long it took to walk through the queue.

 

[Cj2017]

Since cost is an issue I would price out a moderate resort instead of WL. Definitely do not plan too much together. Don't even meet in the lobby, meet in the parks.

Your teens are going to want to hang out with each other, and Disney is the best place to let them go off and be 'on their own'. In this case the on-site transportation is a big plus vs having to drive in from offsite. The teens could meet up wherever and you don't have to worry about it.

I would only schedule one TS meal together max. The rest should be 'on your own'. Otherwise it just gets too hard rounding everyone up.

Maybe last time you went when your kids were small? or at least younger. Their nearly adults now and are going to want to vacation differently, maybe without the togetherness the parents are hoping for.

Or maybe your teens want to be with everyone 24/7 so in that case disregard all this.

This is a very good point that I did not consider. I mean they all have licenses but with it being a rental car and everything this would be one last worry.

 

[Cj2017]

Don’t discount the extra hours at night. While we don’t know how Disney will work it, extra hours at night for deluxe resort guests may be well worth it with lower number of guests at the park. It could be similar to the after dark ticketed events. We attended one at AK and the rides were basically walk on. The wait was mostly how long it took to walk through the queue.

This is what is holding me back from straight on saying no to on-site resorts because even if this is two hours that will be huge in my opinion especially for the teens that want to stay out late and us old people can go back to hotel and chill

 

[DebLovesPooh]

It sounds like your extended family trusts you to plan a great trip and will pay the extra if you recommend it. I think you should tell them that offsite is a much cheaper options, but there are minuses to that option too, and that you and your family are staying at WL because its worth it to you. Honestly, I think having free transportation for all to come and go as they please will be huge.

 

[bluezy]

Seeing the ages of the kids and that this trip is sort of about them, I'd want to stay on site simply for the convenience of the transportation for them. They'd be able to come and go as they please. I don't think any rental car agency is going to allow any of the teens to drive the rental cars so that would be a big off-site deal breaker in our family since I'm not comfortable with our teens using Uber/Lyft by themselves and I don't necessarily want to be in the parks as late as they are and they often don't want to be at rope drop with me. However, if some of the group wants to stay offsite, let them do it. Or maybe those that want to save some money can just stay at a moderate or value resort.

When I plan our extended family trips to Disney (5 family "units" for a total of 13 people) we all take care of our own accommodations, that way everyone is staying somewhere that's in their budget for that trip. None of us ever stays off site, but we're free to do that if we choose. Sometimes we all end up at the same resort and sometimes we're at 3-4 different resorts. It all works out fine -- we just meet up at the parks at some point every day. We don't plan to spend every minute of every day together -- that would be too much "togetherness" for us -- but I know some families prefer to do that. We usually plan to either start or end the day together and go from there. We try to have a few meals together throughout the trip. It's tough for 13 of us to do everything together (we don't all like the same rides or restaurants) so it's hard for me to imagine 18 people (especially when that includes 6 teenagers) trying to do everything together every day for 4 or 5 days straight. That sounds like a stressful vacation to me. But if it works for your group, that's great!