Help from Parents! John-Cole will be 11 and he asked me...

[Beauty]

What did it mean to be fixed? Why do you get fixed...so I tried in simple terms to tell him about an egg and sperm to which he asked well how does the sperm from my rinkydink get to an egg. I stalled a minute and he says Oh you go to the doctor....I ended the conversation with No you don't have to go to the doctor....So do we need to have "the talk" now or is he still too young. I know hes really going to think its gross. HELP!

 

[browneyes]

Yes, it's time for the talk. Be honest and answer all questions the best you can. Knowledge is power, you want him to be responsible. Good luck.

 

[Towncrier]

Just answer his questions honestly, but don't feel that you have to fill in ALL the details. Good luck.

 

[Buckalew]

It's time, Beth.

(Better you than me. ) (and "rinkydink"?) LOL

 

[AZKathy]

Yep! It's time! Good luck! I gave that "duty" to DH to have that good "father-son" talk! Worked for me!

 

[kejoda]

Its time. You'll have to talk to John about who or will do it. This is just the beginning of a lot of talks. good luck

 

[JasonLyons]

lol Beth, I just told Katie we got to get her puppy fixed, and she cried 'I didnt know he was broke' '

 

[browneyes]

Jason, you'd better fix Poo Poo or you'll have lots of Poo Poo's to spank.

Beth, want me to talk to him for you?

 

[Beauty]

LOL...No thanks Shannon I think I'll let his nice innocent father have the talk with him now and then when he gets older I can fill in.

Jason .... NO NO MORE BARKING DOGS!!!!!! LOL! Although they are cute!

 

[browneyes]

Well, if you change your mind, I have a video of my speech I did talking about why we should teach kids about sex education at an early age. I'd be happy to send it to you. If I can find it.

 

[MineeBaby]

Im not a parent but i have two adorable little sisters that i have had an integral part of raising. I was just home visiting last week, and hana (4 years old) was so excited to talk about babies..she then came out and said with ALL sincerity that she knew how babies are made..then she talked about how mommy and daddy love to hug each other, and when they do, a seed from mommy and daddy get together and make a baby and then it gggrrrroOOOOWWWSSS in mommys belly and then it comes out and the baby is so cute! i couldnt belive she was telling me all of this!! So, i think that talking to him about it would be really good to do if you apporach it in a way that they can understand, shrug their shoulders, and treat it as though it is just another thing and get back to playing...just try to act like it is not a big deal and your child will treat it the same...im guessing...hahaha...i guess i will find out more when my turn comes around.

 

[Beauty]

Shannon I agree about the early age and also the openness that should always be there. I also believe in providing protection for them if thats what it comes down too....I won't say more because I don't want this to turn into a debate and saying that about protection is highly debateable but I think John-Cole is fixing to find out something "gross".

Thats so cute about your 4 year old...my next door neighbor has a 4 year old. Well the next door neighbor is pregnant and the little girl tells me one day...My mommy is pregnant....I said I know....she said you know who gave the baby to her? Well I'm expecting her to say God...nope she says "Ronnie" Who is neighbors husband and her step dad....I had to laugh at that.

 

[BibbidiBobbidiBOO]

My DS asked last year when he was 10, and DH told him. Of course he said "gross" ! Yesterday he asked what minipads were(a commercial triggered that) and I told him ALL about girls and periods. I am glad he is comfortable enough to ask us. Don't want him getting the wrong info from friends.

 

[JESW]

Sometimes as parents we answer more than what our children are asking.

Funny you should ask this...this morning DD (3 & 1/2) and I were snuggling and she started talking about when she was a baby. We talked about how she grew in my tummy unitl we went to the hospital and the dr. took her out. She asked if they took her out of my tummy and I said no. Then of course she asked WHERE they took her out. I just told her that some babies come out the same place where pee comes out. She asked - "Did you pee me out?" I answered no and that she just came out alone. "Oh" And that was it. No question about how she got there...yet.

DS is 7 and we had almost the same conversation last week. This gets gross....he has problems with his bowel movements. Can't understand how some thing so big can come out of something so small. Then we talked about muscles and stretching, etc. Thought it was a good time to bring up the "where do babies come from" speech. I then told him that just like his "poop hole", women have places where they pee (ok, ok, I can't say the REAL words yet..) and they can also get larger and stretch - and that's where babies come out. His answer? - "Cool!"

DS was 4 when his sister was born and we showed him various books with somewhat graphic pictures of birth. he took it all in but didn't ask too much. Since he has a little sister he knows what girls look like and he knows that the sexes are different. Must be a little harder on kids who don't have siblings of the opposite sex.

Anyhow...I tend to ramble..good luck to you and your son! I don't look forward to the - "but how did I get there?" talk. Or the period talk with DD. My neighbor and friend has two DD's 10 & 11 and she is going through that now with the oldest. I'll take some advice from her.

When we were that age (waaaaay back when) I remember my Mom slipping a pamphlet to me - "What every girl should know" Ugh. As embarassing as it is, I do want to be able to talk to my kids in an open and honest way.

Jill

 

[dianeschlicht]

In reality, these days, 11 might even be a bit late for "the talk"!

 

[Mermaid02]

I'm surprised he asked.... kids learn soooo much information (and MISinformation) at school these days....... good luck!

 

[Dream]

You are SO lucky that he feels comfortable enough to ask you!! These "talks" work best in our house informally and matter of factly when the question is asked....sometimes while the kids are helping me fix dinner! Guess that's a captive audience!! 11 is about the right age IMHO. Our school system here has a class called "Family Life" where a lot of topics are covered that used to be covered by families...but I won't jump on that bandwagon here ...and 11 is the age where the "technical details" are explained. The girls usually already know...the boys are usually grossed out!! LOL! This is a good thing!!! I tell my dd that I want her to be grossed out for a looooong time!!! Take a deep breath and answer those difficult questions. Your honesty now will set the foundation for the even touger discussions in the years ahead...and your son will love you for it! Good luck!!!

 

[MineeBaby]

Sorta on the same subject but with what happened to ME..hahaha...when i was in 5th grade, my dad was raising us alone (a whole nother story...) and I came home asking what a BLANK is..a slang word for a body part in a very happy state..and he took me over to the book shelf and pulled out the encyclopedia..HAHAHA! There were translucent pages that showed the skeletal system, the muscular system, etc. including all anatomy parts..and then he talked straght forward with the names of the parts and explained what happened..though i had already heard what happened from kids at school and just information out in the world..I was more embarrassed than dad was....and as far as the period talk goes, our school offered a session for moms and daughters to come in, and we talked about how to use the sanitary items, how to use common forms of protection for when you are older, what to do if you find you have started at school (they had a whole system set up where they had stuff available for you at school, including a fresh pair of panties that you would replace later if you used them) and i just remember it being so cool because my DAD was with me...so all these moms and their daughters and my dad and I ....hahaha...and it just wasnt that bad. I also remember later in 6th grade, we watched a cartoon video about how it all works...so, I dont think it is AS big of a deal as some people think it to be..you just have to remember what it was like to be that old and be curious and want to know whats going on..if you are uncomfortable, they will see it and will also be uncomfortable talking about that subject.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Originally posted by dianeschlicht
In reality, these days, 11 might even be a bit late for "the talk"!

I have to agree there!! My dd is 11. I am a girl scout leader. Half of the girls got their periods last year (5th) so this year they are going into C cups. Yep...better get that talk in before his eyes fall out at the girls in his class.

 

[amid chaos]

As long as he still thinks it's "gross" then you are ok.