help! Down syndrome & autistic son

[slcmom]

My 14 year old lives for trips to disney. I try to pull off one a year, either to WDW or Disneyland. Since the incremental cost isn't much, we take a grandchild or two as well. It's also nice companionship for him. The grandkids are 3 & 5. Usually they play really well together, since his functional age is about 4 years old.
Here's my problem. Tom loves the scarier rides, which aren't appropriate for the grandkids. He's also perfectly happy on the Fantasyland-type rides. But I feel bad that he can't also experience the other ones. I'm the only adult on these trips.
I've wondered if I could choose a reliable-looking person in line behind us and ask if he could ride with their group. They would be able to accompany him with his gac. My concern is that it would be tricky to meet up with them after the ride. Exits aren't always clearly marked. The person might be casual about it, and my son would wander off without us. It could be disastrous.
I've wondered about going to the child-swap area of a ride and the kids and I waiting there for my son. Maybe there would be a family there that we could team up with, and they'd be returning to the child swap area anyway, so there couldn't be any confusion.
Does anyone have any ideas? Have you had a similar problem, and how did you resolve it? Thanks for your help.

 

[Disneyland_emily]

<- Former WDW Attration Ops CM

2 big things

First off are the grandkids tall enough to ride most of the rides you are talking about?(doesnt matter if they want to ride) but 99.9% of rides will not allow shorter kids even in the ride buildings

2nd is your son able to be by himself and maintain himself appropriatly (ie would he try to exit the rides at the wrong point etc?) and in case of an emergancy stop/exit would he be able to follow the CMs instructions on how to exit?

If both of those are okay then you'll have no probs and just use the GAC as if the whole party was riding (all rides have exits before boarding) and then put him on the ride and then walk to the exit and wait for him to finish

If the other kids are not tall enough yet he can handle it himself then it becomes complicated- and I would talk to the entrance CM at the specific attractions on how to handle it- They may still allow all of you to go through the attraction and the rest continue to the exit or may allow alternative entrance boarding or whatever they feel is best for their attraction. I personally would be very very hesitant to allow him to ride with another group for the reasons you mentioned and just in general if something should happen on the ride

-em

 

[Ambassador]

Most likely you will find friendly families willing to help in line. But there is the chance of missing him at the exit, especially because the other kids will become impatient waiting for him, keeping your attention away.

You may try posting your question on the 'Families' forum. Single parents may have an answer for you.

 

[SueM in MN]

If his functional age is about 4 years old, I would not personally let him ride either alone or with someone I didn't personally know and trust. Disney's rule about riding alone is that the child must be at least 7 years old, so even if he meets that physically, he doesn't meet if functionally.

If you think about a 4 year old, they might do OK in "normal" circumstances, but if there is a ride malfunction most 4 years would not be able to stay calm and follow directions from a CM. And, since he would be with strangers, if he loses sight of them on the way out, is he likely to be able to find them again to get to the exit?

One alternative would be just to wait to go on those rides until the younger kids are old/big enough. Since your son is OK with the rides they can go on, it may not matter as much to him whether or not he can go on the more wild rides.
Another alternative would be to either bring another adult with you or possibly hire a caregiver for one day of park activities so he can go on those rides with you or the caregiver while the other kids are being cared for by someone else. I have read good things in the past about a service called "Fairy Godmothers". You can probably find some info about them on the Family Board. I know some people had posted a few years ago that the Fairy Godmothers had people who could deal with kids with special needs.
Here's a link to the DIS page about child care services.
There is also information on that page about Disney's child care centers and in-room child care from KinderCare. That way, the smaller kids could do something geared to them while you go to the park with your DS and go on the wilder rides.
One alternative would be the Pirate Cruise which allows kids from ages 3 to 10.