He walked on out us.

[Maddykins06]

Not sure where else to post this, but I just need to vent.

Says he is depressed & has been unhappy for quite a while - news to me.
Yes, we've been in counseling for a few years (he lives life with champagne tastes on a beer budget & I've been the one bailing him out). He told me he has contacted a lawyer, but "isn't sure what to do."

He called me today to "see how our DD was" & asked how I was doing. I just said "fine."

BUT I AM NOT FINE! My heart is crushed. I am angry. I am sad. I broke down at work today in front of my boss (not exactly my most professional moment).

Any words of advice? Thank you!

 

[Mellie2162]

No advice but very sorry this has happened to you. I hope it all works out.

 

[DawnCt1]

I'm sorry. Its got to be awful.

 

[sunnyday123]

so sorry. feel free to vent away, we'll listen.

 

[mrsstats]

No advice. Just wanted to say I am sorry you are hurting.

 

[OceanAnnie]

I'm sorry for what you are going through. Be kind to yourself and hugs to your DD. Find some small ways to treat your DD and yourself.

 

[DisneyBlonde]

In situations like this I think a good counselor is invaluable. Family and friends are always willing to listen, but usually aren't really equipped to help. You need to take care of you, so you can take care of DD.

 

[tiffsix]

WOW- was there one specific incident that finally made this come about? You said you have been in counseling for awhile, did you think it was helping? Not trying to pry, just trying to hel you figure out how to fix it...

You do want to fix it, right?

 

[LuvOrlando]

This is terrible news, I feel so sorry for you and your family

 

[taylor1293]

No advice, just

 

[ginna74]

hugs for you and your daughter

 

[4nana]

My heart breaks for you and DD . Sending hugs and prayers your way. I hope you get lots of good advise here.

 

[kerrynic78]

I know exactly how you feel, I went through the exact same thing about 6 months ago. My ex DH left my 2 year old DD and myself, said he was depressed and didn't love me the way a husband should anymore......news to me!!! He didn't want to see a counselor or anything, it was just over after 4 years of marriage.

The only advice I can give is to get a lawyer, I am so thankful I found a great one and she really helped me out.

I'm so sorry you are going through this, it is so, so hard.

 

[Orangeandwild]

That is so sad, I am so sorry this happened for both you and your DD sake...We are here if you need to talk

 

[Janet Hill]

Not sure where else to post this, but I just need to vent.

Says he is depressed & has been unhappy for quite a while - news to me.
Yes, we've been in counseling for a few years (he lives life with champagne tastes on a beer budget & I've been the one bailing him out). He told me he has contacted a lawyer, but "isn't sure what to do."

He called me today to "see how our DD was" & asked how I was doing. I just said "fine."

Sounds like my ex. Yes we went to counseling for about a year and he said he done.

It's my belief and of course I could be wrong, but I think most men go through the motions of counseling just to assuage their guilt and not with the mindset to accomplish anything.

 

[novajeanjellybean]

No advice just

 

[bumbershoot]

Oh I'm so sorry.

 

[lillygator]

I am so sorry.

 

[brytorlyn]

I don't mean to be a downer but I went through this 12 years ago (kids were 10 and 7 and I was 34). Ex said he wasn't happy, had not been in a long time...not sure what he wanted...the classic..."it's not you , it's me" scenario. It quickly turned into everything was my fault though. You may not want to hear this yet but if I were you I would get a lawyer. Looking back on it I think the best thing I did for myself and my kids was accepted it and moved on and made a new life for us. I was not going to subject my kids to fighting or a home filled with unhappiness. I am not one to give up...but I needed to be in control of my life because I had a responsibility to my kids to be whole person in control of my life.

I will have been married to a wonderful man and a great father to my children from the first marriage and our DD8 for almost 9 years now. The ex never really did grow up and the kids have a relationship with him but they are closer to their stepfather than to him.

I am sorry for what you are going through. Keep in mind you need to put your daughter and yourself first because it is clear he isn't.

 

[SCHBR'smom]

I'm sorry.