Having the guts to let my hair go grey. Update and photos on page 5.

[Vijoge]

Do it! There is nothing wrong with grey, long or short! I'm trying to talk my wife I to letting hers go.

I keep wishing mine would turn gray. I haven't colored my hair in over 20 years (I'm 66) and outside of a little gray at the temples it's still the same color blonde it's been forever. My grandma and my aunt had snow white hair by the time they were my age and it was so beautiful. My mom, unfortunately died before her hair changed color. My MIL has gorgeous white hair. I want white hair!

 

[tzolkin]

I'm only 35, so I won't say "never" but as of now I have no intention of dying my hair as it greys. Mainly just because I'm not willing to maintain the upkeep. I hate spending money on things like that and personally, I think grey roots look much worse than if people had never dyed at all. My DH has no issue with grey hair and I just don't think it would be necessary for my self esteem.

That said, I will not want to "age gracefully" with my eyebrows all turning white. I have been getting greys there and I'm wondering when the transition point is going to come where I need to use colored eyebrow gel or something when they're too many to pluck out. I have thick, black eyebrows that are very nicely shaped and have been a focal feature of my face since I was a young child.

My middle daughter said a few months ago, "I can't wait until I get old and have grey hair." (There is an older woman we know with gorgeous grey hair.)

Along the same lines, I do think it's funny how most are saying that long grey hair never looks good, but that is a huge trend among girls in their 20s now, so some people must think it looks good. My 22 year old cousin just had her hair dyed grey and it looks beautiful.

Maybe I should start lying about my age, but in reverse. Tell everyone I am 65 years old, and they will say, wow, you look awesome for your age.

This has been my tactic for years of taking undeserved compliments. I have a 17 year old who is in college. People assume she's older, and then proceed to assume that I'm much older than I am so I constantly receive shocked comments about how young I look and I usually just say "thanks". I believe they are assuming I must be in my mid-late 40s to have a college aged child, so of course I look at least 10 years younger than that (I'm 35).

 

[Snowysmom]

Like you I have been thinking about going gray or white. I have white mixed in. My hairdresser encourages me to color my hair. She recommends that I do it at home with a mild hair color as I have thin hair. I make such a mess when I color it. So far I have stained the top of the toilet seat, 2 towels, and one set of bathroom rugs. Every time I color my hair I have to take out the rugs and put in the ones I already stained. DH has to help me rinse my hair and we end up making a mess with water all over the floor. I think I am getting too lazy to do it anymore. That is a good reason to stop.

 

[Christine]

And anyway, why would I be ashamed to look older? We used to revere older people. Now we all want to look 25 or 30. If that makes someone happy, then by all means--enjoy it! But can we please stop telling people gray hair makes them look "old" or tired or whatever, as if it's a bad thing? Fwiw, I AM tired. I have four kids at home with me all day.

Well, to some people it matters. I am one of them. I am 52 years old and I work in an office. It's important to me that I am not perceived as looking tired and run down (and I do if I don't fix my hair which is lost most of it's lustrous color but is not really gray). I am not trying to look 25 or even 30. I just want to look my age, but look rested and pulled together. Whether people consciously are aware of it or even want to feel that way, there is a perception that older people in the workplace are not as "with it" as younger people. Right now, I'm pretty with it but I don't want people having preconceived notions about me because I might all of sudden have white/gray hair. I wish it wasn't a thing, but it is. I see it happen to men and, more so, with women.

And yes, you have a reason to be tired. I'm *not* tired but I don't want to look like I am!

 

[MataHari22]

Along the same lines, I do think it's funny how most are saying that long grey hair never looks good, but that is a huge trend among girls in their 20s now, so some people must think it looks good. My 22 year old cousin just had her hair dyed grey and it looks beautiful.

I know what you're saying, but it does sort of look different on a younger person, than it can on an older person. They have a young, fresh, firm face, and they are rocking grey/silver hair, vs maybe me, with a little more wear and tear on me. Kind of like if bell bottoms and 70's clothing styles came back in style, the younger people can wear it and rock it in an ironic, hip and trendy way. Meanwhile, at 48, it would look like I was wearing my mom's or my clothes from back in the day, since I grew up in the 70's and 80's. This is a generalization, of course. There are people who can wear anything and look fab at any age, and they should! That's awesome.

Like you I have been thinking about going gray or white. I have white mixed in. My hairdresser encourages me to color my hair. She recommends that I do it at home with a mild hair color as I have thin hair. I make such a mess when I color it. So far I have stained the top of the toilet seat, 2 towels, and one set of bathroom rugs. Every time I color my hair I have to take out the rugs and put in the ones I already stained. DH has to help me rinse my hair and we end up making a mess with water all over the floor. I think I am getting too lazy to do it anymore. That is a good reason to stop.

Honestly, if I had someone to help me do my color at home, I'd keep going a while longer. But I don't and it's impossible for me with my neck, hands and arm issues for me to do it myself. I struggle even trying to just wash, brush and dry my hair. Also, I have very thick hair, and it is very hard to color, the dye needs to stay on for like an hour. It is messy to do at home! I've ruined things and gotten dye on stuff... and it does not come out. Lol

 

[TLSnell1981]

I have no intentions of EVER going gray...NEVER!

 

[Disney Doll]

Well, to some people it matters. I am one of them. I am 52 years old and I work in an office. It's important to me that I am not perceived as looking tired and run down (and I do if I don't fix my hair which is lost most of it's lustrous color but is not really gray). I am not trying to look 25 or even 30. I just want to look my age, but look rested and pulled together. Whether people consciously are aware of it or even want to feel that way, there is a perception that older people in the workplace are not as "with it" as younger people. Right now, I'm pretty with it but I don't want people having preconceived notions about me because I might all of sudden have white/gray hair. I wish it wasn't a thing, but it is. I see it happen to men and, more so, with women.

And yes, you have a reason to be tired. I'm *not* tired but I don't want to look like I am!

I am an intelligent, articulate, experienced woman. At work, if someone preconceives me as not being "with it" or capable because of my salt & pepper hair, they realize very quickly how wrong they are once they interact with me.

 

[lesliekatya]

I think grey hair can look fabulous! Check out Pinterest for great inspiration. I only have grey around my hairline, and I think it would look a little weird to grow it out now, but I will probably do it when I get enough grey.

There are two questions I think you should ask yourself. Do you like to wear the color grey, and does it make you feel good? And will you commit to either wearing a little color on your face (i.e. Lipstick, blush, etc) or end up possibly looking washed out?

I love to wear grey, but I'm a little too lazy to commit to makeup everyday. Not to mention, it seems to evaporate by the end of the day.

 

[MataHari22]

I think grey hair can look fabulous! Check out Pinterest for great inspiration. I only have grey around my hairline, and I think it would look a little weird to grow it out now, but I will probably do it when I get enough grey.

There are two questions I think you should ask yourself. Do you like to wear the color grey, and does it make you feel good? And will you commit to either wearing a little color on your face (i.e. Lipstick, blush, etc) or end up possibly looking washed out?

I love to wear grey, but I'm a little too lazy to commit to makeup everyday. Not to mention, it seems to evaporate by the end of the day.

Very good points. I do like the color grey, and I've always looked nice in it. When I was working, I had a couple of suits in grey. I often still wear it now. I also look very nice in jewel tones. As far as clothes go, I wear a lot of color. I also like brights, like fuchsia. I also tend to dress in smart casual clothing and favor dresses and skirts over things like t shirts and jeans. I won't wear any make up. I've never really worn much of it my whole life. But I have naturally rosy cheeks, so I usually do not look too washed out, I don't think. In a few post before this, I uploaded a bunch of photos. I'm not wearing any make up in any of those photos. I actually did look through Pinterest, and that's where I found the second group of photos that are how I was thinking of getting my hair cut. There were a lot of great ideas there! Thanks so much.

 

[powellrj]

A couple of grey hair stories. I am what they called a mature mother with my DD. When she was in kindergarten a little boy asked me why I was a mom with grandma hair. I went back to coloring it for awhile! Last week we had the grandkids and one of them wanted to go to wal mart to look at toys because his birthday is coming up. I said I didn't go to wal mart because they were rude to me when I was a vendor. My granddaughter asked me how long ago it was because if it was when I had grey hair that was why. Wal mart doesn't like old people! These were the same kids that wanted me to take them fishing because senior citizens fish for free!

 

[MataHari22]

A couple of grey hair stories. I am what they called a mature mother with my DD. When she was in kindergarten a little boy asked me why I was a mom with grandma hair. I went back to coloring it for awhile! Last week we had the grandkids and one of them wanted to go to wal mart to look at toys because his birthday is coming up. I said I didn't go to wal mart because they were rude to me when I was a vendor. My granddaughter asked me how long ago it was because if it was when I had grey hair that was why. Wal mart doesn't like old people! These were the same kids that wanted me to take them fishing because senior citizens fish for free!

Kids say the darnedest things! lol. Well, so do adults sometimes.

 

[powellrj]

Kids say the darnedest things! lol. Well, so do adults sometimes.

My ddil was embarrassed, but I thought it was cute, but then I think anything they say is cute!

 

[DisneyFan32WI]

Mata- I love your brown with highlights in the pics.

 

[ten6mom]

I am 43 and have very dark brown hair, so any grays are very noticeable. I pull out the ones I can see (which are only the ones in the front) and just hope the ones that I CAN'T see just kind of disappear. Or, worst case, out of (my) sight, out of (my) mind!

 

[MataHari22]

Mata- I love your brown with highlights in the pics.

Thank you!

I am 43 and have very dark brown hair, so any grays are very noticeable. I pull out the ones I can see (which are only the ones in the front) and just hope the ones that I CAN'T see just kind of disappear. Or, worst case, out of (my) sight, out of (my) mind!

Lol! Maybe I could have pulled out the grey I had at like 18 - 20 years old, but definitely by age 26, if I was pulling out greys, I would have had a lot of bald spots!

I have not seen my mom in person in an extremely long time, but by a recent photo she sent me, it looks like I have waaaaay more grey than she does, and she's 20 years older than I am. It's so strange how some people can be so very grey at a young age.

 

[Anesthesia Fine]

I let my hair go gray for a while, reasoning that Helen Mirren does it and she always looks fab. Then she dyed her hair pink. CURSE YOU, HELEN MIRREN!

I didn't go pink, though, just red. Anyway, my point is, I always ask myself these days, "what would Helen Mirren do?" and the answer usually is, whatever the hell she wants to do! It works. Like those cuts you're thinking about! Super-fab. I love them.

 

[MataHari22]

I let my hair go gray for a while, reasoning that Helen Mirren does it and she always looks fab. Then she dyed her hair pink. CURSE YOU, HELEN MIRREN!

I didn't go pink, though, just red. Anyway, my point is, I always ask myself these days, "what would Helen Mirren do?" and the answer usually is, whatever the hell she wants to do! It works. Like those cuts you're thinking about! Super-fab. I love them.

I really like Helen Mirren. She has always been a strong and classy lady.

Was trying to hold off on getting it cut until I can cut out all of the color, but man, looking at my hair today, and it's looking rough. It is cool enough for me to put on a hat. Thank goodness. Lol.

 

[Paula Sedley-Burke]

I am 45 and letting myself go grey. I am hoping for the look like Carol from the Walking Dead... Now she looks cool! Why not try it and if you don't like it go back to dying it. Worth a go!

 

[Farro]

Funny to read this. I am 42 and started getting grey in my late 30’s. I have very dark, above shoulder length curly hair. I wanted to see how long I can go without dying it. So far I’m still good! I’m lucky – my grey comes in streaks and is more silver/white than grey. When I wear my hair down, I have single strands all over my head that either glisten or blend in, and then in the front I have a bigger stripe of grey hairs that I think looks good when it frames my face (dark hair all around it)! I actually like the look, kind of like a crazy witch with curly dark hair with wild white streaks. From far away and in pictures it just looks like dark hair.


My boyfriend is in charge of telling me when enough is enough, time to dye it.
Actually, we talked about that. I told him to get start to get used to it, as I don’t see myself dying my hair. He's bald so he can't say much!

Eventually maybe we’ll get to the point where women wouldn’t even feel the need to dye their hair. Maybe I’ll be a pioneer…..

 

[Deb in IA]

OK - here's my story. Both parents went prematurely gray. Mom dyed her hair from her 30's until she was almost 80. (It didn't help that she is also older than dad, so she felt self-conscious about her age.)
Since, like most kids, I didn't want to do anything my parents did, I refused to dye my hair, even after it started turning gray in my early 30's. Since my natural hair color was black, it truly was salt and pepper hair. It is now about 50-50.
And yes, it is long.

Here's the thing - and not to brag - but I actually get compliments on my gray hair. Women, usually routinely ask me if my hair is "natural" and say that they really like it. So I guess I will keep it.