Grandparents Rights

[AKL_Megs]

Now, my DH and I have been arguing about this.

HE is a police officer and claims that, outside of the hospital (such as in being in the delivery room, when a sick child is admitted, etc.), grandparents have absolute rights to visit their grandchildren.

I disagree. I don't think that they have any legal "rights" at all as far as visitation rights are concerned.

(Sorry grandparents! )

Anyone in the know, please settle this stupid debate.

 

[raysnkaysmom]

Now, my DH and I have been arguing about this.

HE is a police officer and claims that, outside of the hospital (such as in being in the delivery room, when a sick child is admitted, etc.), grandparents have absolute rights to visit their grandchildren.

I disagree. I don't think that they have any legal "rights" at all as far as visitation rights are concerned.

(Sorry grandparents! )

Anyone in the know, please settle this stupid debate.

I don't know the answers, but I know grandparents have filed for visitation rights, which would lead me to beleive it wasn't a 'given'...

 

[Pamlur]

There used to be something called grandparents' rights, but some president (and I believe it was Reagan) did away with that.

 

[Becky2005]

I'm going to say this probably varies by state but my hunch is it isn't an absolute given.

IF according to you DH it is a given, then couldn't the grandparents just pick up the kid at any given time without telling the parents & it wouldn't be considered kidnapping?

I would think that would be considered kidnapping. Where as if a parent picked up a kid, it wouldn't be (barring divorced legal issue stuff).

I'm sure there are good (and not so good) reasons the parents have for not wanting a grandchild to see a grandparent.

I did find this http://family-law.freeadvice.com/child_custody/grandparents_visitation_rights.htm

It basically says Grandparents to have the right BUT they would have to prove to a court that there would be harm to the child's health & well-being if the visitations weren't allowed which can be difficult to prove.

 

[C.Ann]

Grandparents can petition the courts for visitation rights (which 9 time out of 10 they will receive - unless they pose a serious risk to the grandchildren) and can even petition for custody - with good reason..

A judge would frown upon any parent who refused grandparents access to their grandchildren based on things such as: grandma lets Joey stay up past nine when he sleeps over; grandpa lets Suzy have ice cream even though she hasn't finished her dinner; grandma and grandpa buy the kids too many toys; etc..

While parents normally have the final say regarding their children, they can't simply eliminate grandparents from their children's lives based on a whim.. Extended family is very important in a childs life - particularly the relationship with grandparents.. The courts reconize that - and will respond in a manner that they feel is in the childs best interest..

 

[AKL_Megs]

I'm going to say this probably varies by state but my hunch is it isn't an absolute given.

IF according to you DH it is a given, then couldn't the grandparents just pick up the kid at any given time without telling the parents & it wouldn't be considered kidnapping?

I would think that would be considered kidnapping. Where as if a parent picked up a kid, it wouldn't be (barring divorced legal issue stuff).

I'm sure there are good (and not so good) reasons the parents have for not wanting a grandchild to see a grandparent.

I did find this http://family-law.freeadvice.com/child_custody/grandparents_visitation_rights.htm

It basically says Grandparents to have the right BUT they would have to prove to a court that there would be harm to the child's health & well-being if the visitations weren't allowed which can be difficult to prove.

Good info!

... Seriously, glad I don't have kids!!!

 

[sbell111]

Grandparents have no guaranteed rights related to their grandchildren. In some states, they could be able to sue for visitation, but that would be an uphill battle with a steep slope.

 

[Allison]

Grandparents can petition the courts for visitation rights (which 9 time out of 10 they will receive - unless they pose a serious risk to the grandchildren) and can even petition for custody - with good reason..

A judge would frown upon any parent who refused grandparents access to their grandchildren based on things such as: grandma lets Joey stay up past nine when he sleeps over; grandpa lets Suzy have ice cream even though she hasn't finished her dinner; grandma and grandpa buy the kids too many toys; etc..

While parents normally have the final say regarding their children, they can't simply eliminate grandparents from their children's lives based on a whim.. Extended family is very important in a childs life - particularly the relationship with grandparents.. The courts reconize that - and will respond in a manner that they feel is in the childs best interest..

Do you have data that shows it's 9 out of 10? It would vary by state and it's certainly not a given that grandparents will be given visitation as latitude is given to parents to make decisions.

Here's a link that has information by state http://grandparents.about.com/od/grandparentsrights/a/VisitationRightsByState.htm

I randomly picked Iowa as an example. It certainly doesn't sound like it would be easy to win visitation in this state:

Under the new law, grandparents must "clearly and convincingly" prove that they have a substantial relationship with the grandchild, that the custodial parent is unfit to make a decision about visitation and that visitation is in the best interest of the child.

 

[sbell111]

Grandparents can petition the courts for visitation rights (which 9 time out of 10 they will receive - unless they pose a serious risk to the grandchildren) and can even petition for custody - with good reason..

A judge would frown upon any parent who refused grandparents access to their grandchildren based on things such as: grandma lets Joey stay up past nine when he sleeps over; grandpa lets Suzy have ice cream even though she hasn't finished her dinner; grandma and grandpa buy the kids too many toys; etc..

While parents normally have the final say regarding their children, they can't simply eliminate grandparents from their children's lives based on a whim.. Extended family is very important in a childs life - particularly the relationship with grandparents.. The courts reconize that - and will respond in a manner that they feel is in the childs best interest..

I find this difficult to believe. I bet that few judges will involve themselves in the affairs of parents if no harm is being done to the child. The grandparents would have to show proof that their not being able to see the grandchild is in some way harming the child. This would be very difficult to prove.

If you have case law to back up your position, I'd appreciate it if you would cite it.

 

[Sandy V.]

Grandparents have no guaranteed rights related to their grandchildren. In some states, they could be able to sue for visitation, but that would be an uphill battle with a steep slope.

Yep, this is true. In most states, the parents are presumed to be "fit" parents for their children and can make any and all decisions regarding who their children have/don't have contact with (among other typical parenting decisions they make). There's a high standard of proof needed to rebut that presumption.

 

[belle&sebastiansmom]

Grandparenting is not a right, it's a privilege.

 

[java]

No legal rights. imho

 

[DisneyBamaFan]

I have heard of a number of cases in the northeast whereby a grandparent sued for visitation and won. In these cases, the grandparent was a large part of the child's life before the suit and something cause a family rift, which led to the parents refusal for visitation.

I would be willing to bet that this is based on state law, not federal law, so state precedent would be the big question mark. More conservative states are much less likely to interfere with parental decisions...

 

[NHdisneylover]

Where I think grandparents manage to successfully sue for visitation is normally when a parent dies. If the surviving parent then tries to sever all ties with the "in law" family and keeps the grandparents away it can lead to a court case. In that type of situation it can be argued that the children are harmed by effectivly losing grandparents as well as the lost parent and grandparents can win visitation rights.

 

[Wishing on a star]

NO given grandparents rights... Period....

Back off Granny!!!!

PS: As a police officer, the OP's husband should take it upon himself to KNOW the laws in his State/jurisdiction.

This has been discussed here before, and at that time, I think there was only one State where a poster said that a grandparent was afforded any consideration or 'rights' at all....

A grandparent has NO right a grandchild.
A parent has no right to control/force their own child, once the son or daughter is 18 years of age... period...

If I even thought that my warped MIL would begin to 'sue' for rights... I would take my son and move to where she would not easily even be able to find me to try to have papers served.

 

[Wishing on a star]

NOTE: Child custody under extenuating circumstances is a completely different issue than 'grandparents rights'.

 

[C.Ann]

Under the new law, grandparents must "clearly and convincingly" prove that they have a substantial relationship with the grandchild, that the custodial parent is unfit to make a decision about visitation and that visitation is in the best interest of the child.

If you have case law to back up your position, I'd appreciate it if you would cite it.

No - I don't have any case law to back it up with - just the experiences of 4 sets of grandparents who are "4 for 4".. Three obtained visitation rights (without a custodial parent being deemed unfit to make decisions regarding visitation) and one received full custody..
I would think that "4 for 4" is a good indicator of how grandparents rights are currently perceived by the law - and by judges - but I could be wrong.. As I said, I am basing my statements on what I know to have happened - not a hypothetical situation..

I would assume that state laws apply - which may vary from state to state.. All 4 cases that I know of were in NY - although I currently know 2 other grandmother's who are petitioning for visitation outside of NY right now.. (Sad stories..)

Obviously the grandparents that were granted full custody here (NY) were able to obtain that status due to the unfitness of a parent..

 

[AKL_Megs]

PS: As a police officer, the OP's husband should take it upon himself to KNOW the laws in his State/jurisdiction.

Thank you for this, but I don't appreciate it at all. My DH is plenty capable as a police officer. You don't know anything about him or what he does on a daily basis.

A grandparents right is a civil issue, something that would be handled in court. As a police officer, he would handle the CRIMINAL aspects of this CIVIL issue.

Your comment has absolutely nothing to do with the question I asked.

 

[C.Ann]

I have heard of a number of cases in the northeast whereby a grandparent sued for visitation and won. In these cases, the grandparent was a large part of the child's life before the suit and something cause a family rift, which led to the parents refusal for visitation.

I would be willing to bet that this is based on state law, not federal law, so state precedent would be the big question mark. More conservative states are much less likely to interfere with parental decisions...

This is what I am thinking as well.. I do in fact live in the northeast and as you can see from my previous post, I do in fact know grandparents who have won visitation rights..

I never thought of the "conservative" angle.. That could very well be a possibility for the variations of how this plays out from state to state..

 

[C.Ann]

NO given grandparents rights... Period....

Back off Granny!!!!

PS: As a police officer, the OP's husband should take it upon himself to KNOW the laws in his State/jurisdiction.

This has been discussed here before, and at that time, I think there was only one State where a poster said that a grandparent was afforded any consideration or 'rights' at all....

A grandparent has NO right a grandchild.
A parent has no right to control/force their own child, once the son or daughter is 18 years of age... period...

If I even thought that my warped MIL would begin to 'sue' for rights... I would take my son and move to where she would not easily even be able to find me to try to have papers served.

Why such a hateful post? And why the nastiness towards the OP's DH? This is really sad..

And just an FYI, but in NY you have no control over your own child once they are 16 - not 18.. (Or at least that's how it's always been in the past..)