Gift Giving / Exchanges Are Out of Control!!!!

belle&sebastiansmom

DIS Veteran
Joined
Jan 7, 2008
Messages
1,982
Fa la la la phooey!

I'm becoming disgruntled this Christmas!:rolleyes:;)

When friends that you and your child occasionally see socially (so I'm not talking bff's here) say, "oh, we bought the cutest Christmas present for your kids, the yada yada yada . . ." I want to scream! I feel that the only reason they are telling me that they bought my kids a gift is to ensure that their child gets one in return.

I don't have the money to buy for every child that my kids hay have played with at one time or another, but I don't want to feel guilty or have my kids feel awkward when a buddy gives them something and they have nothing to return. Yes, maybe the other mom's want to instill in their child the grace of giving and not receiving. But if that were the case they would just give the gift, not preface it weeks before with statements like above.

And can we talk about gift exchanges? I've had to buy too many $5 and $10 gifts for school, church, scout, sports exchanges, you name it, and also the adult Christmas party dirty Santa gifts. It adds up quickly. Enough already! I'm trying real hard to get gifts for the people that matter and under a budget!
 
Fa la la la phooey!

I'm becoming disgruntled this Christmas!:rolleyes:;)

When friends that you and your child occasionally see socially (so I'm not talking bff's here) say, "oh, we bought the cutest Christmas present for your kids, the yada yada yada . . ." I want to scream! I feel that the only reason they are telling me that they bought my kids a gift is to ensure that their child gets one in return.

I don't have the money to buy for every child that my kids hay have played with at one time or another, but I don't want to feel guilty or have my kids feel awkward when a buddy gives them something and they have nothing to return. Yes, maybe the other mom's want to instill in their child the grace of giving and not receiving. But if that were the case they would just give the gift, not preface it weeks before with statements like above.

And can we talk about gift exchanges? I've had to buy too many $5 and $10 gifts for school, church, scout, sports exchanges, you name it, and also the adult Christmas party dirty Santa gifts. It adds up quickly. Enough already! I'm trying real hard to get gifts for the people that matter and under a budget!

Why not just don't participate in the organized gift exchanges? They're not mandatory but some of us really enjoy them and don't mind a bit if someone says they aren't going to participate. :confused3
 
And this is exactly why I won't do a gift exchange in our GS troop. I always have one or two mothers ask me every year if we are having one. I feel that there is no need to exchange gifts. We have a holiday related treat, make a craft and eat candy canes - all supplied with troop funds. The girls are quite content and there is one less thing for the parents to do.

And I am purposely not buying gifts for my DD's friends. They make little crafts for each other from supplies we have in the house. Because in our world it's all about the thought and not the price. :thumbsup2

Sorry you're having to go through this. :hug:
 
I totally understand. I mean, if I'm not getting my DH a gift (or getting one from him), why do I have to get one for everyone in my office. I don't even share a bed with them!! LOL Thankfully though, there are only 3 people in the office that I have to buy for, and they are all very nice, so I don't mind, but still.... jokingly I said, "Hey, why don't we all just get each other NOTHING - then we will be even!" They just laughed.... Guess I'm out anout $60 to get everyone here something....



Just want to add, I'm not a humbug at all, I love this time of year, but money is tight right now. Back when I was single, no house, no kids, I would buy everyone something, I loved it. But now, I have to be more conservative with the money. Sad but true.
 

And this is exactly why I won't do a gift exchange in our GS troop. I always have one or two mothers ask me every year if we are having one. I feel that there is no need to exchange gifts. We have a holiday related treat, make a craft and eat candy canes - all supplied with troop funds. The girls are quite content and there is one less thing for the parents to do.

And I am purposely not buying gifts for my DD's friends. They make little crafts for each other from supplies we have in the house. Because in our world it's all about the thought and not the price. :thumbsup2

Sorry you're having to go through this. :hug:

When I took over dd's GS troop we stopped doing the Christmas gift exchange, not one of the girls cared. We stillhad our party with treats and crafts and they had a blast.

I only buy a gift for dd's BFF, they have been friends for years and we are friends with her parents. I do not ever buy any gifts for any of my 2 ds's friends.
 
Why not just don't participate in the organized gift exchanges? They're not mandatory but some of us really enjoy them and don't mind a bit if someone says they aren't going to participate. :confused3

Fine for the adult exchanges, but try explaining it to young kids who wouldn't understand why they were the only ones not giving and receiving a present. I can complain about it, but I would never let my kids be singled out by not being able to participate, which I why I suck it up in real life and complain on the dis!!;)
 
DD15 friends used to all exchanged gifts- there were about 7 of them. When she was about 12 and money was really tight (DH was out of a job) I told her she had to make them something. She ended up knitting each of them something different using yard I already had. This year she is making treats for them- chex mix, cookies, etc depending on the person and what they like.
 
/
I totally understand. I mean, if I'm not getting my DH a gift (or getting one from him), why do I have to get one for everyone in my office. I don't even share a bed with them!! LOL Thankfully though, there are only 3 people in the office that I have to buy for, and they are all very nice, so I don't mind, but still.... jokingly I said, "Hey, why don't we all just get each other NOTHING - then we will be even!" They just laughed.... Guess I'm out anout $60 to get everyone here something....



Just want to add, I'm not a humbug at all, I love this time of year, but money is tight right now. Back when I was single, no house, no kids, I would buy everyone something, I loved it. But now, I have to be more conservative with the money. Sad but true.

Why does it have to be so pricey? I did gifts for three girls in my office. I gave them each a box of homemade oreo Truffles, and a handblown glass necklace. I found the necklaces at the mall for $6 each and I made the entire batch of truffles for $5. Gift exchanges only have to be as expensive as we make them. there are certainly ways to make them more cost effective.
 
Fine for the adult exchanges, but try explaining it to young kids who wouldn't understand why they were the only ones not giving and receiving a present. I can complain about it, but I would never let my kids be singled out by not being able to participate, which I why I suck it up in real life and complain on the dis!!;)

Thats why I specified "organized exchanges" because I wasn't talking about the children's gifts. :flower3:
 
Why does it have to be so pricey? I did gifts for three girls in my office. I gave them each a box of homemade oreo Truffles, and a handblown glass necklace. I found the necklaces at the mall for $6 each and I made the entire batch of truffles for $5. Gift exchanges only have to be as expensive as we make them. there are certainly ways to make them more cost effective.

We all said no more than $20 for each person. So I guess $60 would be the max.
 
At one point I loved exchanges. The older I get the less I like them.

As much as I dislike them, I'd never wish for them to go away. Why spoil it for those who enjoying it? Just opt out.
 
Fa la la la phooey!

I'm becoming disgruntled this Christmas!:rolleyes:;)

When friends that you and your child occasionally see socially (so I'm not talking bff's here) say, "oh, we bought the cutest Christmas present for your kids, the yada yada yada . . ." I want to scream! I feel that the only reason they are telling me that they bought my kids a gift is to ensure that their child gets one in return.

I don't have the money to buy for every child that my kids hay have played with at one time or another, but I don't want to feel guilty or have my kids feel awkward when a buddy gives them something and they have nothing to return. Yes, maybe the other mom's want to instill in their child the grace of giving and not receiving. But if that were the case they would just give the gift, not preface it weeks before with statements like above.

And can we talk about gift exchanges? I've had to buy too many $5 and $10 gifts for school, church, scout, sports exchanges, you name it, and also the adult Christmas party dirty Santa gifts. It adds up quickly. Enough already! I'm trying real hard to get gifts for the people that matter and under a budget!


When a parent says that say, "Thank you for thinking of my child but we would prefer that you give the gift to <insert a charity>."

When they do one of these exchanges keep your kid home or say "Thank you but we prefer not to participate".
 
I guess I'm weird just because someone gives my child a present, I don't feel the need to run out and get them on in return
 
Just a thought for next year ~ Dh's office decided instead of gift exchange they found 2 soldiers w/ ties to the office & made Huge care packages for them. :santa:
 
For my best friends I get presents, and family. But for friends I buy little bags and put candy in them to give out! :thumbsup2
 
For my best friends I get presents, and family. But for friends I buy little bags and put candy in them to give out! :thumbsup2


This is what my DD's do, we look around for Lotions or chapsticks or things like that that you get 5 or 6 things per package for around $5 then we buy a big box of candy canes and they open up the lotions or chapsticks and wrap those up with a candy cane or another kind of candy and they have a nice little gift for a few of their friends.
 














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