Funeral Activities?

[mselly13]

Inspired by HelenePA...stating that she was having a dinner party and a bounce house because those were her dad's wishes.

Do you or anyone you know want something different at their funeral?

My dad wants us to sing and dance and have a good time when he goes.

My mom wants us to have a BBQ cookout at her lakehouse. And if weather permitting, she wants us to go swimming and boating and just have a party.

What wierd things have you heard of?

 

[james'mommy]

My dad wants to pick the music and he said it's not going to be just a few songs. I told mom to make sure that he burns a cd for us.

 

[Cindyluwho]

I want a fun service and I want them to play the video from Monty Python: "Always Look on the Bright Side of Life" Completely tacky and in poor taste, but that's what I want! Leave 'em laughing!
Both my DH and my DD14 know that's what I want so hopefully it will happen, but not for a long time of course.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LxQgXgS5G3c&feature=related

 

[lemondog]

My cousin's husband passed away recently, and per his request they had a big cocktail party at a swanky club. Heavy hor's doeurves, open bar...the works. They also had a small prayer service (he was not religious but wife insisted there be some kind of prayer for the family's sake) and a couple of his closest friends spoke. He was cremated and this summer they plan on spreading his ashes in the Chesapeake Bay.

It was definitely very different than any funeral I have ever been to, but it's what he wanted and it was actually a very positive, uplifting experience for the family.

 

[belle&sebastiansmom]

At FIL's funeral earlier this year, right before a minister spoke on his behalf, they played "Sweet Caroline" by Neil Diamond. It was strange, mostly because I find it such an upbeat song and everyone was sitting there, stiff as a board (no pun intended). I think some of the folks were shocked. I wish someone would have had the guts to start singing along. I think he would have like that.

 

[dzorn]

DH did mention he would like the Hockey organ song (what ever that is called) played at on the organ at church. He thinks it would be a riot. Told all relatives if we die together I want a separate funeral.

 

[doxdogy]

A friend of ours passed away about 5 years ago and that was his request. No memorial service, no funeral. He wanted everyone to have a cocktail party in his honor.

My cousin's husband passed away recently, and per his request they had a big cocktail party at a swanky club. Heavy hor's doeurves, open bar...the works. They also had a small prayer service (he was not religious but wife insisted there be some kind of prayer for the family's sake) and a couple of his closest friends spoke. He was cremated and this summer they plan on spreading his ashes in the Chesapeake Bay.

It was definitely very different than any funeral I have ever been to, but it's what he wanted and it was actually a very positive, uplifting experience for the family.

 

[HelenePA]

Yes my dad is not the cry for me because I'm kind of guy... I tried to get a DJ I know but he wasn't sure I was serious when I said I wanted to hire him for my dad's funeral.. he said he's never had that type of request before... He wanted a party and to be donated to science.. He loved seeing the kids have fun so we'll make sure they do. Better to laugh than cry, which I've only seen him do a handful of times and even then it wasn't for long... He made my childhood so much fun, fishing, camping, mtn climbing,doing werid stuff, scaring the hell out of my mom all the time(one of my favorite things!), fireworks, going to the beach, we were spoiled with toys because he loved to play with them too! Flour fights in the kitchen while making homemade pizza, mud fights, splashing in puddles after the rain, running in the rain with our bathing suits on... stuff parents usually dont allow kids to do.. I hope he's up there having a party now.. I dont know if he realized how much I (and my kids) needed him here, but apparenlty his work here was done and he went home to be with my mom... I just wish we had time for a little more fun before he left... I miss him dearly please dont think because we are having a "party" for him it means he is not missed. Its just what he wanted and really I dont want to cry anymore..

 

[Handbag Lady]

In 1977, my uncle wanted everyone to play poker and drink whisky the night before his burial.

My family is so cool, they even had the kids playing (grandpa taught us) and we were allowed one sip of booze.

 

[Handbag Lady]

My husband has a playlist on his iPod called Funeral.

For my burial, I want everyone to dress up, have cocktails, and no one wearing sneakers will be allowed in. Hats are a must, too. And furs (if you have them from your grand-mama). And you're playing Frank Sinatra and afterwards, everyone must go to Vegas or at least play a game of craps.

My grandfather (the one who taught us Poker) watched Days of our Lives his entire retirement for 27 years or so. The theme song was his opening to the funeral. Everyone laughed so it got off to a good start.

 

[dkdaisy]

DH wants to be viewed in a glass box because he feels he'd be claustrophobic in a typical coffin. Plus, we want to be cremated, so why buy a coffin any way (cause I just have a glass box laying around that's big enough for my 6'3" 400 lb husband, uh huh ). He's weird. He wants Johnny Cash songs played and wouldn't be adverse to being set up in a recliner watching TV instead of lying a glass box.

I'm so much more conservative than him. Give me a church funeral with a regular coffin any day.

But to me, the funeral is for the living, not for the dead, so his funeral will end up being whatever it is that I (and the family) need to get through his death.

 

[HelenePA]

watch out I always said too bad I'm gonna do with ya what I want your dead.. he then told me he'd come back to haunt me... soooo my dad got his wish... And did you know you could "rent" coffins if you'd like to have a funeral before he's cremated...

 

[barkley]

My dad wants to pick the music and he said it's not going to be just a few songs. I told mom to make sure that he burns a cd for us.

ya might want to check out the songs ahead of time. i know of a funeral where the family provided a c.d. dad had pre-recorded, all his favorites. it was for the most part great, but when one of his favorites came on everyone had to agree that it probably was'nt appropriate to the situation-'you picked a fine time to leave me lucille'

 

[akhenaten]

Yes my dad is not the cry for me because I'm kind of guy... I tried to get a DJ I know but he wasn't sure I was serious when I said I wanted to hire him for my dad's funeral.. he said he's never had that type of request before... He wanted a party and to be donated to science.. He loved seeing the kids have fun so we'll make sure they do. Better to laugh than cry, which I've only seen him do a handful of times and even then it wasn't for long... He made my childhood so much fun, fishing, camping, mtn climbing,doing werid stuff, scaring the hell out of my mom all the time(one of my favorite things!), fireworks, going to the beach, we were spoiled with toys because he loved to play with them too! Flour fights in the kitchen while making homemade pizza, mud fights, splashing in puddles after the rain, running in the rain with our bathing suits on... stuff parents usually dont allow kids to do.. I hope he's up there having a party now.. I dont know if he realized how much I (and my kids) needed him here, but apparenlty his work here was done and he went home to be with my mom... I just wish we had time for a little more fun before he left... I miss him dearly please dont think because we are having a "party" for him it means he is not missed. Its just what he wanted and really I dont want to cry anymore..

your remembrances made me smile..........what a gift you had to have such wonderful tmes together........

sending good thoughts for comfort and peace to you and yours....

 

[BriarfoxinWA]

This is kind of a timely thread here. My DH's Grandma is currently in the hospital dying. Its been tough but she is 88 and ready to go. She went into ICU on Saturday and they currently are just seeing to her basic needs. I don't think she's been awake since yesterday. DH family is pretty traditional and they are planning a viewing then a cremation - probably no real religous service. It's just been a sad week - DS17 was talking to her Saturday and she told him she needed a drink - he offered to smuggle her a shot of whiskey. She just laughed - she's not a big drinker.

 

[barkley]

Inspired by HelenePA...stating that she was having a dinner party and a bounce house because those were her dad's wishes.

Do you or anyone you know want something different at their funeral?

My dad wants us to sing and dance and have a good time when he goes.

My mom wants us to have a BBQ cookout at her lakehouse. And if weather permitting, she wants us to go swimming and boating and just have a party.

What wierd things have you heard of?

wierd would be the funerals a certain population in the town near where i grew up did.

their custom was to have a HUGE party but it had to include the deceased prior to inturnment (so basicly held at the funeral home with the deceased in an open casket)-and bbq's were a big tradition such that one of the local funeral homes that was the first choice of this group had large bbq pit's in the back it was realy odd to see their ads which prominantly mentioned 'bbq on site'

 

[minkydog]

When my dad was dying, he did not want to talk about his funeral. So my sister & I came up with the plan to have him cremated and buried at the feet of his mother whom he loved dearly. He liked that idea very much, mainly because it was inexpensive.

We had a grave-side service. Then we all went back to the house and ate fried chicken, potato salad, and cake. DBro filled a big galvanized washtub full of beer and took the kids for rides on his horse until it got too dark to see. The rest of us sat around playing charades and singing camp songs. We laughed and played and had a great time. Dad would have thought that was a hoot! I'm sure the neighbors were scandalized by the Pink Floyd, though.

 

[IMALOVNDISNEY]

watch out I always said too bad I'm gonna do with ya what I want your dead.. he then told me he'd come back to haunt me... soooo my dad got his wish... And did you know you could "rent" coffins if you'd like to have a funeral before he's cremated...

This made me laugh. This is a conversation my DSis have often. She has all of her plans written out. She is a controll freak(but, so am I). She wants to be cremated and have her ashes scattered in various places that are special to her. I'm not liking that idea it to well. I keep telling her that she better hope I go before she does. Because other wise, I'll get the last say. She keeps telling me she'll haunt my A** forever. And I know she will. She knows I will follow her wishes to the letter.

When DBr. passed away. We had a traditional service, church, burial. But requested that everyone bring a fishing pole to the gathering after the burial. We gathered at a local fishing spot that my DBr loved and fished, ate, and shared memories for the rest of the day. We also each released a white balloon with personal messages to my DBr. Now, 6 yrs. later on the anniv. of his death many of us still gather to fish at this same spot. It's nice because life always gets in the way of getting togeterh. But, on this day everyone makes sure their there. And this is never a planned our or spoken thing. We just do it.

 

[HelenePA]

WELL if I had my way this is what we would do... I like said I get him back cremated by US mail in about 45days (there is also a fee I have to pay and I pay it by paypal... anyone else see humor in this??) ... I wanted to wait 45 days and have a "welcome home party". Yeah we are a weird bunch of people.

 

[crz4mm2]

DH wants a big "chow line" and he wants to be at the end of it I told him we would get a big cardboard cut out of him and have it sitting at the end so he could watch us eat
I don't want any one to be sad either. I want them to take my ashes to Hawaii and have a big party Throw me in the ocean!