"Friends" just excluded me - do I ever let them know I know?

[yoopermom]

This is why I prefer to work with men instead of women
Guys will cuss, maybe throw a fist or two, then make up over a drink. So much easier to understand than talk, talk, talking!!

Your DISfriends are your true blue friends!
Terri

 

[DMRick]

Hopefully for you, this will work out and it was just the one person. If the others are your friends, and it still bothers you, I would talk to one or two of them and let them know your feelings were hurt. I've had the same friends for years and years, and I want to continue to keep them, so I'd rather talk to them and take a chance that I won't like what they say, (and then fix the problem) than to give up on them. Remember, they may have been in an awkward position as well, and didn't see a clear way to fix it. If you plan on working there for a long time with these people, you don't want to cut off your nose to spite your face. You don't want to be the left out person for the rest of your work career.

 

[C.Ann]

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Very smart woman..

Okay, mystery solved. I told my friend in the office that I saw "Madame X" in the office. My friend said, "Yes, Madame X organized a lunch with...[listed whole gang]...you should have come!" I said, "Madame X didn't invite me and I even talked to her in the hall." She said, "Well, Madame X said she was going to organize more of these, I'll have to make sure you're invited to the next one." I said, "Obviously Madame X doesn't want me there ... "

Hmmm...wonder what I ever did to Madame X?

Could be something or could be nothing.. Either way, now you know it's someone you need to avoid..

Well, here's my take now that there's an update of sorts.

Madame X doesn't like you, doesn't want to lunch with you, who cares why?

I'd still be wary of the rest of them, but that's just me...none of them sound like great friends or BFF material. They sound like "OK" work friends.

I agree.. Tread lightly.. If it becomes an ongoing issue, just write them off.. Plenty of other people in the world (and work place) that you can choose to be friends with..

Good luck - and I hope you're feeling better today!

 

[OceanAnnie]

Glad you got to the bottom of it. It was petty (and ugly) of Madame X to speak loudly for you to hear and to even say, Hi to you all while working her plan. She must have known how it would effect you. She is a bad egg. And the rest of them sound like rotten eggs too. If I were part of that group, I would've mentioned it to you beforehand or if I thought you "knew" I would've grabbed you on the way out. It sounds to me like they were somehow "onboard" with the program. I'd back off the friendship department and keep up/develop other friendships outside of work.

Well, here's my take now that there's an update of sorts.

Madame X doesn't like you, doesn't want to lunch with you, who cares why?

I'd still be wary of the rest of them, but that's just me...none of them sound like great friends or BFF material. They sound like "OK" work friends.

Madame X sounds like a meanie. Let that be her problem, not yours. I too would be friendly at work, but not overly so.

And btw, DD, way to go on the bridal shower hosting invite! You nailed the best way to handle it!