Freshman curfew hours

[OhMari]

Our youngest child is a Freshman in H.S.

Our older 3 kids pretty much kept to their curfew, but our oldest 22 just announced "what is that noise?, schlup, schlup, schlup, "it is **** hitting the fan when you are a freshman and you break your curfew"

Anyway, our youngest dd is a freshman and we live in a small village town. After her volleyball games, it is manditory that she stays for the varsity vb games. There is always a football game going on most nights also. We live one block from the h.s.

She is gone most nights of the week and not coming in the door till 9:30-10:00. She tells me she walks people home, her best friend is an 8th grader and lives about 2 blocks away. I call her best friends mom and she tells me how nice it is that Callie walks her daughter home. "What about my daughter".

I hate how dark it gets, by 7:30 p.m. it is completely dark outside. This summer I told her she always had to be home when the street lights came one. (She really liked that one, especially when it started getting earlier and earlier.

I just can't believe my baby is in h.s. and I can't handle her not being in the door at night.

Thanks for listening.
Stressed out Empty Nester!

 

[Kirby]

I would say to play it by ear. Use the same rules as you used for your older children but be aware that it may not work for this one.

My son, who is a junior now, did not have a curfew when he was a freshman. We sort of live out in the country and so we had to drive him anywhere he wanted to go. He has a curfew now since he began to drive this summer. School nights is 10:00 pm and weekends is 11:00 pm. Of course, this is flexible depending upon school activities. He learned about six weeks ago what happens when you push the rules. His school nights was set back to 9:00. He has since earned it back to 10:00.

Do you have a cell phone that she can use on those evenings when she has to come home in the dark? I would either go and get her, even though you live so close or have her call when she leaves the school and let you know she is on her way home and if she is walking her friend home first. You can never be too safe.

 

[noel]

I am sure your daughter is a good kid and is just enjoying the social scene during her first year of high school, but I do hope she's still getting her homework done and keeping up in all of her classes!

Personally, I'd pick her up from whatever activity she's at if it's in the evening. Even if she's walking home with friends, once it's dark, she's still not 100% safe.

I'd also try to limit how many activities she attends each week. I know spending time at home w/her family isn't the most popular thing for a girl her age to do, but it seems excessive for her to be gone that late every night.

Just my opinion....
She is however VERY lucky to have a Mom who's worried about her.

 

[sharbear]

I have a Freshman in HS also. She's is not out late on school nights. She runs cross country and her meets are on Sat. so we don't have to worry about games. If she's not home until almost 10 p.m. when is she doing her homework. My Freshman does 1 or 2 hours of homework a night, at least.

I would be worried about her homework and I would also worry if she is getting enough sleep. I would tell her she has to be home right after the games, no walking everybody home, she has too much to do and you don't want to be up that late.

My kids don't have a curfew, we just play it by ear. Unless they have a school activity, they are home after dinner. Weekends it depends but my Freshman is usually home by 11.

 

[Kitty 34]

My youngest is also a Freshman and I've never worried about a curfew before (he's always been a homebody) until this past weekend when he asked if he could go to a bonfire a friend was having at her house, after their band competition.

I let him go but only 'til 10:00. He went over there at 6:30. I figured that was long enough time!


It's almost harder, I find.....letting go of the YOUNGEST!

 

[luvflorida]

I have three kids. One is out of college and one is a Junior in college. My youngest daughter is a Freshman in high school, and I agree that it is hardest to let go of the youngest.

That being said, however, when they were Freshmen they were never out late on a school night. Actually, it was rare that they were out late on a school night all through high school. If there was an activity at school, I would drive them and pick them up. Once they were Juniors and Seniors they drove themselves. I used to worry the most about my middle daughter because she was always involved in music and plays, and she had to attend a lot of rehearsals that would take place after dark.

We live in a small town, only a mile from the high school, but I still worried. I would never allow either daughter to walk alone anywhere at night.

Maybe I'm being a bit overprotective, but my youngest daughter, (Freshman), does not go anywhere on a school night except for dance classes. I drive her and I pick her up. Weekends she has sleepovers and does things with friends, but even then I always know where she is, who she is with, and what they are doing. Again, she is not out late at night, unless it's at a movie with friends.

I don't know. It works for us, and she hasn't complained. The older she gets, the more freedom she will be allowed. She knows this and understands this. She is very bright, involved in activities, and has a lot of friends. I don't think we're cramping her style.

 

[zurgswife]

We live in a very small town and my dd 8th grade isn't allowed to walk places alone at night...she must be with a group or we will be picking her up. I'm not so concerned about curfews as I am her safety...I lot can happen in just a few blocks on a dark evening...

 

[Nancy]

My freshman plays soccer and games end at 6:30..even though it's light I still pick her up. Any weekend activities I either drive to and another Mom picks up or vice versa...no way are they walking even 1 block in the dark. So she really doesn't have a curfew except for nights when I am the pickup Mom and I have to get up early for work...then it's either 10 or 11 depending on where she is. Now my 16 yr old hardly goes anywhere except her friends houses...I also pick up and drive her. I just don't like them walking the streets at night and we are not in a bad area. Better safe then sorry.

 

[OhMari]

Originally posted by zurgswife
We live in a very small town and my dd 8th grade isn't allowed to walk places alone at night...she must be with a group or we will be picking her up. I'm not so concerned about curfews as I am her safety...I lot can happen in just a few blocks on a dark evening...

I know a lot can happen in just a few short blocks. Would you believe the road block is right next to our drive way. You can't drive into the h.s. during activities. So cars are parked all around our block.

Yesterday my daughter had a vb in a town about 30 miles away. I thought she played at 6:00, but the bus left at 3:30 and she played at 4:30. I ran up to h.s. and had the principal sign me a note that I could bring her home after her game, otherwise it would of been 10:00 again. When I walked into the gym, she ran up to me and asked if I brought food along (I did I brought grapes and crackers) but I showed her the note and she was very grateful I did that. Her friends wanted me to take them home too, but there are very strict policies on bus riding, so I couldn't.

When we got home, her 2 older brothers told her how concerned they were about her, and then said mom and dad are only looking out for your safety.

We are going to shut down our land line phone and use that number for our 4th cell phone in the house so she will be able to have one. Her brother who is a Junior told her to call him anytime and he will walk her home or pick her up, even though it is only a block or if she had to walk friends home. (Same with me or my husband, but brothers are much cooler).

Thanks for all the responses. She is having a great year as a freshman and she loves being with her friends, but I wish a few more parents would make their kids be in the house (when the street lights go on), just kidding. It is so hard to let the baby be a high schooler.