Found out 2 8th graders at DD's middle school are pregnant

[MELSMICE]

I didn't read anything that would suggest that the boy was over the age of consent or that the girls were anything less than willing to participate.

The boy is in 8th grade also.

 

[shortbun]

I think someone needs to have a "talk" with that boy!!!!

My thoughts exactly!

 

[Virgo10]

When I was in nursing school we had a 12 year old in delivery. She was 11 when she got pregnant. That was a very long time ago and I've never forgotten it.

 

[MUFFYCAT]

My DD is in 8th grade and will be 14 in August. The thought of her being preqnant is scary and sad. I hope those girls have some emmotional support during this time.

 

[Bichon Barb]

Though having an abortion is much safer than childbirth, especially for young girls, I'm sure its not exactly a walk in the park either. I have a daughter who has reached puberty, I think dealing with either an abortion or childbirth if she got pregnant would be suffering the consequences. We can talk all we want about the boy being made to suffer consequences, but he can neither be forced to pay for an abortion or a delivery.

One way or another the girl gets punished more for having sex and that is where I think tings are *** backwards. If having sex is a punishable offense, then the punishment should be equal. The boy should be forced to have his testicles tied in a knot while his girlfriend gives birth.

The main reason I'm so vehemently pro-choice is because I believe that pro-lifers are more concerned about punishing girls for having sex , then being concerned for the welfare of children.

ITA!!

If my 13 year old daughter became pregnant, it would not be the time to dish out punishments! "What you did is wrong. Your punishment will be to become a MOTHER. Whether you like it or not! And we'll see if you ever do THAT again, missie!" Can you imagine?

I'm with Caradana. Quiet abortion as soon as possible. With plenty of reassurances that she is loved that everything will be okay.

Then it's time to sit down and talk about what steps need to be taken so that this will never happen again.

JMHO.

 

[wdwgirl03]

There is a sixth grader at my DD's middle school that is pregnant. A girl in her seventh grade class has already had a baby.

O M G. That is unreal. I am twenty and I can't even imagine having a baby right now!!!!!!!!!!!! I think my parents would disown me!

 

[Tess]

In our school system we have one 8th grader, two seniors, and two juniors all becoming mommies. One has already delivered and all are keeping the babies. We all know who will be raising the 8th grader's child now don't we! So sad really. . .they don't know what they don't know! To think, I waited until nearly 30 before having my first! What was I thinking?

 

[Bill_Sykes]

Last week a judge in Florida ordered the state to permit a 13 year old who was in state custory to have an abortion. One of the reasons for the Judge ording the abortion is interesting. Palm Beach County Judge Rules 13-Year-Old Girl May Obtain Abortion; State Officials Appeal

Alvarez also cited testimony stating that 13-year-old girls are three times as likely to die from carrying a pregnancy to term than from having a legal abortion. "Delaying the child exercising her constitutional right ... would increase the risk to the child of her losing her life," he said

Jeb eventually decided not to appeal the case and the 13 year old has had the abortion.

 

[SillyMe]

Last week a judge in Florida ordered the state to permit a 13 year old who was in state custory to have an abortion. One of the reasons for the Judge ording the abortion is interesting. Palm Beach County Judge Rules 13-Year-Old Girl May Obtain Abortion; State Officials Appeal Jeb eventually decided not to appeal the case and the 13 year old has had the abortion.

Well, that would be one of my concerns and it's the choice I would make for my daughter.

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

This thread got me thinking. When I was in middle school (grades 7,8,9) I know of two girls who had babies. Don't know what they did with them, but they had them. There was another girl who had an abortion. In high school I only know of one girl who was pregnant (they sent her to an alternative school to finish the pregnancy & she never came back). Another girl had a baby already and was raising it. Another girl had an abortion right around graduation. I am 34, so this is not a NEW thing.

I have also been thinking about the INCREDIBLE pressure the boys put on the girls to have sex at age 15 on up. A boy in high school once asked me if I wouldn't have sex with him because I was ashamed of my body! I had a CUTE body back then! Where do they learn these lines? I am happy to report I never did give in to that boy. Arrogant jerk.

I think as parents we need to talk to the girls and tell them that boys will use ALL SORTS of measures to talk them into things. We need to tell the boys that they have to be responsible for their actions and they have to be respectful of themselves. I saw a Cinemax documentary where the GIRLS (middle school) were relentlessly pursuing the boys with offers of, well, never mind.

Young teens really have no clue about the emotional aspects of sex, and they ignore the possibilities of STD's and pregnancy. I don't know if having a boy or a girl is worse. I will want to kill DS if he gets some little tart pregnant and she insists on keeping the baby. Or if he talks some hag of a girl with no self-esteem into having sex with him and she gets pregnant. AACK!! The possibilities are endless!

 

[Cindy B]

When I was in nursing school we had a 12 year old in delivery. She was 11 when she got pregnant. That was a very long time ago and I've never forgotten it.

My SIL is a newborn nursery nurse in a large urban hospital. She said her youngest patient was 11.

I have a 10 year old, and that is scary to me.

 

[SillyMe]

Or if he talks some hag of a girl with no self-esteem into having sex with him and she gets pregnant.

Wow, I don't even know what to say.

 

[chadfromdallas]

I have also been thinking about the INCREDIBLE pressure the boys put on the girls to have sex at age 15 on up.

Don't act like its a one way street. Guys get pressured as well.

 

[TheOtherVillainess]

To think, I waited until nearly 30 before having my first! What was I thinking?

Yeah me too. I didn't get pregnant till I was 25,almost 26. What kind of moron am I, not having my child while still in HS?

I didn't know any girls in my school who got pregnant at such a young age, although there was a Hispanic girl down the street who got pregnant when she was like 15 or 16. I don't know if she ended up keeping the baby or not.

I have to talk to DH about his stance on all this. We're going to preach abstinence but IF he decides to go and have sex anyway, IF he gets a girl pregnant, HE'S accepting the consequences and is going to be involved in the baby's life whether he wants to be or not.

TOV

 

[Bill_Sykes]

Abstinence only programs encourage oral and other forms of non-******l sex. How Bush's faith-based say-no-to-sex sex education is failing our kids

But these studies also highlight that abstinence-only and other sex ed programs have a critical flaw in common: The focus is on "sex" defined either explicitly or implicitly as ******l intercourse. The abstinence kids pledge not to have sex (******l intercourse) but do have oral sex, manual sex, and anal sex. The teens in the Pediatrics report who've had oral sex think it's not sex. That study also found that "adolescents did believe that they were more likely to experience pleasure from ******l sex than from oral sex," a message promoted not only by sex ed, but by kids' peers and the media. Other forms of pleasure, especially female sexual pleasure, including clitoral stimulation, are not part of the discussion. ******l intercourse is the big deal, the one with physical and emotional repercussions—everything else is safe and breezy

These stats comparing students who took the abstinence pledge to non-pledge takers are scary. Study says virginity pledges are ineffective

Among those surveyed who had not engaged in ******l intercourse, pledgers were over six times more likely than non-pledgers to have engaged in oral sex, Bruckner and Bearman reported. Male pledgers who had not had ******l intercourse were four times more likely to have had anal sex than their non-pledging counterparts, according to the report.

Do not blame the kids just because they are getting bad education due to the emphasis on abstinence only education.

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

SillyMe-
That was a joke. I certainly hope that I can teach my DS to treat girls/women with respect and NOT to view them as prey to be conquered. But I absolutely think low sef-esteem and/or poor self-image contribute to teen pregnancy. Some lowlife guy comes along and tells these girls just exactly what they want to hear so they will give in. Sad. And there are guys out there who will purposely look for girls who they think they CAN convince. I would be mortified if my son turns into one of them, but I ran across PLENTY in my younger days so they have to come from somewhere. I never wondered about those boys' parents until NOW. What information (if any) did those boys get at home, and how did they come up with their seduction tactics?

ChadfromDallas-
I absolutely agree that the tide has turned and the girls are pursuing the guys more often. The pressure from guys I was referring to was in my own experience. The guys were far more predatory. I don't think I knew ANY girls who were randomly offering sexual favors to whatever guys were interested. It appears from the documentary I watched that oral sex has become the same as kissing as far as these kids are concerned.

I posted on the "suggestive cheerleading" thread yesterday that the cause of increased pregnancy, STD's and drop-outs are in direct correlation to abstinence-only sex ed curriculums. Our jobs as parents are incredibly challenging. We can talk until we are blue in the face but there is no guarantee our kids will heed our advice. I can bet some of them will purposely do the exact opposite, just because they CAN. Best to arm them with as much info as possible and hope they make wise choices when the time comes.

 

[SillyMe]

SillyMe-
We can talk until we are blue in the face but there is no guarantee our kids will heed our advice. I can bet some of them will purposely do the exact opposite, just because they CAN. Best to arm them with as much info as possible and hope they make wise choices when the time comes.

I'm glad to see that someone agrees with me there. Too many people like to blame it on poor parenting and think that just because they teach their children good moral values that they won't end up in that situation. Some of them are going to be in for the shock of their life one day.

We all want the same thing for our kids. We just have to teach them the best we can and hope and pray they don't end up in that situation.