Foreclosure? UPDATE#12

[jmac323]

We are 3 years into a foreclosure. Our credit score went from 765 to 640 and is now at 730. It went back up within a year because we kept on top of everything else. We have no late payments, etc. No recourse was taken on a 30 yr fixed mortgage. It was the best money decision we have made for our situation. We do not want to buy another house and are happy renting. However, a friend of mine is in a new house 2.5 years after foreclosure. do what's right for you, but do your due diligence and research first

 

[holden]

Double check the child services rules. If you could squeeze 3kids into one bedroom and one in your room, you might be ok. Here near Philly, kids can't sleep in a hallway or non bedroom (i.e. Closet). Maybe you could temporarily put 3 kids in one bedroom until you find a new home (keep the one with you). Child services always prefer children stay with family over foster parents.

 

[Shelly F - Ohio]

OP HERE...I am not behind on my payments. I have been in my house for 13 years. I am just in a lose lose situation right now. My husbands son was just abandoned by his mom. He was left with one of her family members. Well something happened in the sate that they lived in and DFACS got involved. He is currently in foster care and the only way we will be able to get him is if we have a large enough home for him. Right now we only have 2 bedrooms. When I first bought my house it was just me and my daughter. Well since then I am now married with 3 kids. My 2 daughters share a room and my son sleeps in my room. We have been trying to sell the house we are in but have been unsuccessful because of the market plus the neighborhood has really gone down hill since my purchase. We have tried renting it out but their are so many rentals in my neighborhood that has not worked out either so far. Anyways the social worker is giving us 90 days to find adequate housing or he will have to stay in foster care. I love my house and my credit but I love my family also. I am just weighing my options at this point. Even after we get him for the first year they will be coming to the house doing visits, so we have to provide something stable for him. We need an additional 3 bedrooms. UGH...Yes I can afford it I am only still in my current residence because I cannot sale it. I owe about $80,000 for it but it is only worth $45000. I just don't know what to do.

I use to work in a children services dept. and they will continue to come to your home for inspections even after the first year. Its the law until you legally adopt him, his casework has to make monthly visits to the home until the legal adoption occurs.. At that point they will close the case and not make anymore visits. In her situation she can not squeeze children into a room. Each gender must be in a separate room and not a co-share room with a parent. All girls in a room and all boys in another room. OP only has a two bedroom house and the girls are in one bedroom while a son shares her room so she has no room to house the other male child because all male children would have to be a separate room that only has males occupying the room

 

[Hannathy]

If you have a room for each gender child which you do , don't you have another area that you and your husband can use? can't you sleep on a pull out in the living room? or make a dining area into a bedroom? do you have a garage you can do into a room for you and your DH? it doesn't have to be great. Wouldn't that work for children's services?

I have a good friend who slept on a sofa bed for over a year till they could make a bedroom in their basement for her and her husband.

I would sleep on the floor to keep my child out of foster care.

 

[RitaE]

How old is your husband's child?

Is it possible for your husband and your son to rent a small 2 bedroom apartment somewhere together until the situation with selling your house is worked out, and then you could all move to a larger dwelling together?

Not optimal I know to legally to be living apart from your husband, but sometimes you have to do what you have to do.

 

[kymom99]

"I use to work in a children services dept. and they will continue to come to your home for inspections even after the first year. Its the law until you legally adopt him, his casework has to make monthly visits to the home until the legal adoption occurs.. At that point they will close the case and not make anymore visits. In her situation she can not squeeze children into a room. Each gender must be in a separate room and not a co-share room with a parent. All girls in a room and all boys in another room. OP only has a two bedroom house and the girls are in one bedroom while a son shares her room so she has no room to house the other male child because all male children would have to be a separate room that only has males occupying the room"

I'm not questioning you, because I am sure you know your job, and I don't know the details of this family. But I don't understand why someone would have to adopt their own child.

I do like the advise of the poster who suggested converting another room into a bedroom. My sister lived in a 4 room house when she first married and had 2kids in 2 years. They made a bedroom out of the dining room for the little ones.

I know how it feels to be stuck in a house you no longer want. I still own my first house. Many years ago, before I owned it, an interstate highway was built behind the neighborhood. Years later the damage to the foundations was becoming obvious. Eventually the basement wall in my house began to bow. I spent $20000 to have it repaired using a home equity line. The only reason we were able to move to a better neighborhood was because my parents died and we used my part of the inheritance to by my childhood home from the estate. I still own the other house. I rent it to my niece to pay the mortgage and equity line. I eat the taxes and insurance for now. It never would have sold during the housing slump, so at least I had the payments covered. She and her husband want to buy it but he needs to find more permanent employment first. I will be very glad to be rid of it.

It is a very tough situation to be in and I am sorry for you. I hope you can work it out.

 

[mistysue]

OP, I can really relate to that. I bought my house as a single parent... in October 2004. The housing market here started to dive in Nov-Dec 2004. I bought my house, which appraised at $170,000- and a year later when I started dating my best friend it was valued at about $50,000. We are now married with 3 kids and no realistic way to get out of the house. Add to that being sandwiched between two homes abandoned for foreclosure... and adding to the house is sounding really good. I would talk to neighbors and friends, see if people know people who can do work. Add simple rooms, such as a downstairs bedroom and small living room. No plumbing, just walls, roof, foundation and electricity. It is the plumbing that makes additions so costly.
If you go around asking to add just a 1 story 15x20 room with one interior wall to the back of the house you might be able to find a better deal than you are expecting. It might cost you less in the long run than the moving costs and hit to your credit. Then for resale that downstairs bedroom can be a bedroom or office.

 

[plummer925]

Also - CPS is going to look badly upon a foreclosure - that may end up hurting your chances of having the child in your home. I am a prior foster parent, so know the 'rules' in my state at least!

 

[Hannathy]

I really think closing in a porch or a carport, fixing the garage or even throwing on a very simple, small addition, just to get the room is going to cost you a helluva a lot less than going thru a foreclosure and what that will do to your credit. That is if you can't make it work in the house.

 

[bumbershoot]

OP HERE...I am not behind on my payments. I have been in my house for 13 years. I am just in a lose lose situation right now. My husbands son was just abandoned by his mom. He was left with one of her family members. Well something happened in the sate that they lived in and DFACS got involved.

It is just so unfortunate that the mom didn't just bring him to his dad's.

I use to work in a children services dept. and they will continue to come to your home for inspections even after the first year. Its the law until you legally adopt him, his casework has to make monthly visits to the home until the legal adoption occurs..

The OP's husband is the child's father. Why would there need to be an adoption?

How old is your husband's child?

Is it possible for your husband and your son to rent a small 2 bedroom apartment somewhere together until the situation with selling your house is worked out, and then you could all move to a larger dwelling together?

Not optimal I know to legally to be living apart from your husband, but sometimes you have to do what you have to do.

I like it. I would start there and move forward as you can.

 

[bumbershoot]

I really think closing in a porch or a carport, fixing the garage or even throwing on a very simple, small addition, just to get the room is going to cost you a helluva a lot less than going thru a foreclosure and what that will do to your credit. That is if you can't make it work in the house.

That's good, too, though maybe not as fast as a quick small apartment rental.



OP, it seems like the real situation is the child situation! That's the one to ask about. So many people will have loads of ideas for that. The foreclosure situation isn't even happening, and wouldn't for a period of months of not paying. But the child situation is right now and immediate. I know it's far more emotional and hard to talk about, but talk about it to get ideas!

 

[Hannathy]

That's good, too, though maybe not as fast as a quick small apartment rental.



OP, it seems like the real situation is the child situation! That's the one to ask about. So many people will have loads of ideas for that. The foreclosure situation isn't even happening, and wouldn't for a period of months of not paying. But the child situation is right now and immediate. I know it's far more emotional and hard to talk about, but talk about it to get ideas!

Oh I so agree! I don't know the rules but if the kids have separate enclosed actual bedrooms, is there a rule you as the parents can't sleep on a sofa bed? Cause that would be my first inquiry. then I'd go for a dining area, hell I"ld throw up temporary walls if that was what was required! or like I said a garage, throw down an area rug put in your furniture and viola a parents bedroom.

I just can't see going thru foreclosure when there are lots of options that will cost far less than the hit on credit that would do,

 

[Colleen27]

Oh I so agree! I don't know the rules but if the kids have separate enclosed actual bedrooms, is there a rule you as the parents can't sleep on a sofa bed? Cause that would be my first inquiry. then I'd go for a dining area, hell I"ld throw up temporary walls if that was what was required! or like I said a garage, throw down an area rug put in your furniture and viola a parents bedroom.

My guess is that nothing short of adding on would do in the eyes of CPS. Around here at least they can be very nit-picky. My DD's room is a finished, walk-in attic/bonus space. It only has a 3/4 high door (about 5' tall) off the upstairs hallway (where all the bedrooms are) because of the roof line where the two-story part of the house connects to the single-story part that the attic is above, and when we were trying to get DS's half-brother placed here they told us that wasn't an allowable bedroom because of the "limited access". Our girls already share a room (not that room - we finished it for DD5 but she and DD12 still want to share a bedroom) and DS's room is too small for a second bed, but we thought that extra room was perfect. CPS didn't agree. Which was, in hindsight, probably for the best for other reasons I hadn't thought of at the time, but it has been very hard on DS16 to lose all contact with his 7yo brother and I'd hoped we could spare him that.

 

[Hannathy]

My guess is that nothing short of adding on would do in the eyes of CPS. Around here at least they can be very nit-picky. My DD's room is a finished, walk-in attic/bonus space. It only has a 3/4 high door (about 5' tall) off the upstairs hallway (where all the bedrooms are) because of the roof line where the two-story part of the house connects to the single-story part that the attic is above, and when we were trying to get DS's half-brother placed here they told us that wasn't an allowable bedroom because of the "limited access". Our girls already share a room (not that room - we finished it for DD5 but she and DD12 still want to share a bedroom) and DS's room is too small for a second bed, but we thought that extra room was perfect. CPS didn't agree. Which was, in hindsight, probably for the best for other reasons I hadn't thought of at the time, but it has been very hard on DS16 to lose all contact with his 7yo brother and I'd hoped we could spare him that.

Yeah but I'm not saying put the children in there I"m saying put the adults in. I know for Children's services they need a room with a regular door, shared only with the same sex. can't be a folding screen door either. And she has 2 official bedrooms.

 

[sweetpeakaris]

No advice, but wanted to wish you luck. You are doing the right thing!!

 

[chloelovesdisney]

Does your husband have a lawyer? You aren't looking to be a foster parent, your husband is getting his child. Why would they be doing a home inspection at this point?

 

[Zydebearsmom]

It's me OP...my house is extremely small so the only available room we have would be the living room. I don't think that would work because that is the first room you walk into when you come into the house. My house is 1198 sq. feet. I could convert the garage but that would take time and money neither of which I have enough of at this short notice. The reason that the state is involved is because before she left him some form of abuse went on. I'm not really clear as to what but DFACS from another state called here looking for him. So once her relative turned him over in Georgia at that point he became custody of the state. We are not adopting him but to get him out if state care we have to prove we can provide a suitable home for him. We thought about getting them a 2 bedroom just for show but even a cheap nasty one is going to cost $700 plus utilities. My DSS is 12. My son is 6 and he has to sleep in the room with us because of the unavailable space...on the weekend we put him out on the couch. I hate I am stuck in this situation without a simple way out. I thought homeownership was the way to go...I bought my house when I was 22. I thought I was doing the right thing. I was a single parent with a 4 year old, working full time and going to school no welfare. 2 years later I had another child. House was perfect size for a mother and 2 girls still working full time no welfare. 2 years later I married their father house started to get small but I wanted to get my masters degree so wanted to watch our money so I remained in the house. Quit my job went back to school full time. 2 years later had another baby (boy). Once I finished school the housing market started falling out. I got a new job been their 3 years making decent money however I can't sale my house so I have just been making due living like this. But then we found out about DSS. He is ADHD (no meds) so I am worried about him not being treated fairly because of his behavior. So I'm trying to work as fast as possible.

 

[Shelly F - Ohio]

If DSS has been diagnosed as ADHD and he is in state custody he is automatically enrolled in the state medical care program. Therefore he would have access to the meds he needs. Have you talked this over with his caseworker?

As long as you do not legally adopt him, he will be covered by the state medical program. Once you adopt him you are responsible for providing medical insurance for him as well as obtaining his meds.

Is there another family member who could take him in until such time you can provide different housing?

What about using the $2100 you put down on the Disney cruise back in Dec to make the needed additions to the garage to make it into a bedroom. Or canceling your trip next month to Daytona and using that money for the addition.

 

[knewton64]

My house may be going into foreclosure soon. I know that it stays on your credit for 7 years but how long did it take for your credit to start to get better? Were you ever able to eventually by another house? I read online that it would take bout 2 years for my credit to repair itself. I was just wondering if that was true.

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Hmmmmmm......after much debate, I will let the below poster speak for me as I agree with their last sentence as well....
(the one that I highlighted)
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If DSS has been diagnosed as ADHD and he is in state custody he is automatically enrolled in the state medical care program. Therefore he would have access to the meds he needs. Have you talked this over with his caseworker?

As long as you do not legally adopt him, he will be covered by the state medical program. Once you adopt him you are responsible for providing medical insurance for him as well as obtaining his meds.

Is there another family member who could take him in until such time you can provide different housing?

What about using the $2100 you put down on the Disney cruise back in Dec to make the needed additions to the garage to make it into a bedroom. Or canceling your trip next month to Daytona and using that money for the addition.

T.T.F.N.
&
Cheers Y'all

 

[MSLRAC]

OP, if you don't have the money to convert your garage into a room, how are you planning on getting another place to live? Most rentals and apartments require first and/or last months rent plus a security deposit. So it's going to cost you to get in somewhere else.

I honestly have to agree with the PPs that say cancel your trips and use that money. There is no way if be facing foreclosure and have money tied up in vacations.