? for parents re: preschool

[Melora]

My older 3 (now teens 15,17,18) did not go to preschool. At the time there was nowhere near where we lived that I could afford for them..but they had each other so it want so bad.

My DS9 went to a year of all day preschool (9-3) before he started Kindergarden and loved it. He was so shy it helped him come out of his shell.

My little guy-3 is now on the waiting list for the same preschool his older brother went to. He loves/needs to be around other kids. When I go to the gym and he goes into their child care while Im dancing, he never wants to leave.

He has a November birthday and I think we are going to hold him back a year (our cut off for K is Dec 6th). I dont want him to be 4 when he starts K.

My oldest started early (Almost the same birthday as the youngest) and he was always the smallest kid in class.

 

[frustrated]

JFTR, it IS possible for children to learn basic phonics at home as well as at pre-school.

eta: I have yet to see an independent study that shows that children are more advanced by 6th grade now that they are intensely educated in the very early years.

 

[dizagain]

We must have posted at the same time!! I do agree with you, HOWEVER, if a child is going to attend public/private school (not home-school), I feel it's better to prepare them. Quality pre-School programs are wonderful, and they do not stress children out. My children have never had the fortune of living on a street overflowing with children. They needed the social benefits of Pre-school, and I feel they were blessed with wonderful experiences. They learned letters/numbers, etc. in a low-key way in a Christian (just our personal choice) way.

I DO feel we are pushing our kids in every way these days. It does concern me that the age-range for learning to read is 4-8, but we expect children entering First Grade to be reading already (at least at my public school). It is a BIG world out there, and I just think it's better to prepare our kids a little - the right Pre-School program can really do that.

Now, don't get ME started on why my kid is not good enough at EIGHT to play softball because half of her team quit to go "select" or why it's too late in life for my TEN-YEAR-OLD to start a sport because everyone else has been playing since age 3!!!LOL!!!!Society DOES push our kids...

 

[frustrated]

we once again cross posts! I don't mean to step on your toes, being the last poster! I just don't see any evidence that says the current path is the best one!

 

[Jenn Lynn]

DD will be 3 in August and will start a 2 day/week, 2.5 hours Pre-school in September.

 

[bananiem]

Well, some of you know that I HAVE to put my 2 cents in here.
As a former preschool teacher and director with an elem. and early childhood degree I think preshool is a GREAT idea!!
Our public school district just finished it's first year of all day kindergarten. The reason the kindergarten teachers wanted it so badly was because of the gap between kids each fall. They said it's getting wider and wider. With all day kindergarten they can focus a little more on the kids who missed out on preschool for whatever reason. And I'm not talking about abc's and 123's. I mean the gap in life experiences.
Example- Them of the week is Fall Harvest/Apples. On the one side of the spectrum you have kids that went on a field trip to an apple orchard in preschool. Then you have the kids that you have to explain what an apple is because they've never seen one and don't know it can be made into apple sauce. True story.

 

[frustrated]

But that is also not the norm, I suspect. I took a 10 yr old for his first ice cream cone once. Also not the norm. Although, it may be where you live. I believe, however, that anyone as intelligent as the OP has probably explained the difference. I still say that kids are blessed to be at home with an active involved parent. Not that this is a requirement for life, but it is a nice blessing.

 

[bananiem]

OK, I'm an overly-active SAHM with the afore-mentioned career and such. I took my 4-5 year old preschoolers to field trips to the grocery store bakery, the fire station, etc. Did I ever all the bakery and say "Hey, I have 2 kids. Can I bring 'em over and show 'em around?" No. Never even occurred to me. I've never tie-dyed with me kids either- something I used to do once a year with my classes.
My kids benefited from having somebody else show them some things.

 

[nkjzmom]

I apologize for not reading everyone's posts so far. I've done a little of both with my 3 oldest. I've gotten together with friends who have children the same age and we've held preschool in our home 2 days a week for a month, then it would change to the next house. Plus they've gone to a preschool at our local college 2 days a week/half days. It's worked out extremely well. I do believe it helps them tremendously.


As bananiem mentioned even as home preschoolers we took our kids to the fire station, grocery store, etc.

 

[bigbabyblues]

My ds is 3 now, he'll be 4 in November. He will miss the cut off for kindergarten the year he'll turn 5, and he will be going two years of preschool.

Steph

 

[frustrated]

Originally posted by bananiem
OK, I'm an overly-active SAHM with the afore-mentioned career and such. I took my 4-5 year old preschoolers to field trips to the grocery store bakery, the fire station, etc. Did I ever all the bakery and say "Hey, I have 2 kids. Can I bring 'em over and show 'em around?" No. Never even occurred to me. I've never tie-dyed with me kids either- something I used to do once a year with my classes.
My kids benefited from having somebody else show them some things.

I assume this is directed at me. My only point is that I think that there are trade-offs. Early education can have some benefits as well as being at home with a parent. They don't have to be the same! Geesh!

 

[SRUAlmn]

Your daughters are absolutely GORGEOUS!! Where in Maryland are you located? I teach dance in Bel Air and I was just wondering where they dance.




I also think preschool is a MUST, especially for 4 year olds. Kindergarten can be a very scary thing if your kids aren't used to being around so many other kids, and going to preschool gives them exposure to that without having to walk in to a huge school. I have taught preschool and have also been a director and I have seen such wonderful growth in the kids that come in and it makes me feel so great to know that I just helped give them a head start in life. Good Luck!

 

[cinmell]

Thanks for your responses everyone! My 3 year old is an only child and she's currently in a playgroup on Tues/Thurs 2-5:30 that started during the middle of March and ends next week. She's very, very active. We go to the park, ice skating in the winter, bike riding, she comes shopping with me and she loves going to the firehouse (luckily my brother is a fireman so we get to visit quite often). She is very interested in gymnastics so she will try that out in July when the new session begins.

I want her to be around children more and thought that preschool was a good way to introduce her to the school environment. She can spell and write her name. She knows her abc's is is counting quite well. She has become very interested in spelling the past couple of months so now we have to spell everything for her. I think preschool would be good for her due to being around children and learning more discipline but I didn't know if I should be taking advantage of her missing the kindergarten age requirement and keep her home doing what we've been doing for one more year. Ahhhh, decisions decisions! Thanks again!

 

[Az Pirates]

Hey Cinmell,

I was in much the same situation with my DD last year.
I have 4 kids and DD is the youngest. We have done a variety of pre-school programs with the others, from parent co-ops to church based pre-schools to a pre-school program run by the school district.

I guess I will be one of the lone dissenting voices here. I really wanted to spend lots of time with dd last year and not be running her off to pre-school all the time. Maybe a little selfish on my part - but we had a great time together! She is just as prepared to start K in the fall as any of my other 3 were.

I have to admit I was a little nervous, mostly because I got so much of the same type of responses as on this thread when people found out she was not in pre-school.

So I did sign her up for a month long summer session at our elementary school. It's taught by one of the K teachers.
I talked to the teacher yesterday and she said DD is more than ready for kindergarten and has already taken a leadership role in the class. She (the teacher) has kids in the program who are in no way ready for K and they DID go to pre-school.

Just do what feels right for you and your DD!

 

[Barb D]

Frankly, if I didn't have to work I would keep my DD home. I homeschooled my big kids, and would love to do it with her, too. But I know she's going to go to public school for K, so I decided to send her to preschool, too. In some ways it's been good for her, but in her case she's not ready for academics and it's been more pressure than she needed. If I could keep her home, I could really do things at her own nice, slow pace.

 

[Disney Enthusiast]

I'm a dissenter too. I've got one at that age now and I am in the same boat. My DH and I decided to keep him home w/ me. I didn't go to preschool as a child, and did wonderfully in school anyway, although I did take into consideration that I grew up in a totally different world back then. I do have an Elementary Teaching degree, although I am a SAHM now. My friends who have older children think I'm crazy as they see BIG benefits in preschool and big drawbacks from lack there of and I am really feeling the pressure from all the supporters of preschool. I just don't think my DS needs preschool. If your DD is shy and needs to interact w/ other children to "pull" her out of her shell, then I think it might be wise to enroll her. My DS will play w/ anyone and I do take him to areas where he is able to interact w/ other kids. Also, we keep a light schedule here at home which I think prepares him for the discipline and schedules he'll have in K. I could be wrong, but that's what we are going to try. I may feel differently about my daughter when she's at the age. But I think you decide w/ each child. Also, my pediatrician said that all his 3 daughters didn't go to preschool and they are all gifted students doing very well in their classes. He said the best thing for toddlers is to go on field trips and look at all the different bugs, or to wrestle w/ their parent in the grass, or to experiment w/ baking in the kitchen... you get my idea. I guess I just don't agree w/ society saying I "have" to put my child in preschool in order for him survive the world. This is their time to be kids.

Your DD sounds like she enjoyed her short time in a preschool-like atmosphere so maybe it's perfect for her. But I agree w/ the previous poster that you do what will be best for her. Some kids need preschool to prepare them for K and they enjoy the atmosphere, others do just fine right at home. Good luck w/ your decision.

 

[Parkhopper]

I was a SAHM with my son. He is an only child (and the only Grandchild/great-grandchild on BOTH sides). He is very bright and I did not feel that he would need pre-school as he was so articulate and able to read proficiently at an early age. I put him in pre-school at age 4 (many pre-schools in our area start at 2 or 3) and wish that I had started him earlier. Even though he had "playdate" experience, he did not socialize very well with the other children, mostly because he was always around adults.

I agonized over whether to hold him back a year before entering school (my choice was made more difficult by how advanced he was in reading). Eventually, we decided to have him transfer to a different school which offered a Full day Kindergarten program. So he had one year of pre-school, one year of half day Kindergarten and one year of full day Kindergarten before going into first grade. I have never regretted holding him back and doing the full day of Kindergarten (his birthday is Sept 30), but I don't know if I would have needed to do that if I had put him in pre-school at 3 instead of 4. He just needed one more year for the socialization.

Now he is a happily adjusted 3rd grader (going into 4th next year) who reads at a 10th grade level.

PS He is in a wonderful school that gives him extra "Challenges" because they recognize that he is an exceptional reader. He also tutors a few of the children in his class which has done wonders for his self esteem (and patience!)

 

[SRUAlmn]

Look at my counter! See you there!!

 

[Dopey Sharon]

I put both my kids in preschool a year before they started kindergarten. They went two afternoons a week for 2 1/2 hours a day. At first, they had a hard time going, especially my son, but after a while they loved it. It was really good for them.

 

[CEDmom]

If you think your DD would benefit from a more structured program than it's worth giving it a try. If after a month or so she hasn't adjusted than you can pull her out. Every child is different. Preschool/pre-k has done wonders for our DD in terms of her social skills. She goes 3 days a week which also allows for a lot of mommy time.

Personally, in the area we live in I think a child would be at a serious disadvantage going into kindergarten w/o attending any formal program. It just isn't heard of anymore around here even in homes with a SAHM or D. Just being able to sit in a group, follow directions and wait your turn are huge developmental milestones necessary for a successful kindergarten year.