For anyone who has moved away from all family

[DisneyLover83]

So all my extended family lives in the same small town (about 1300 miles away or within 90 minutes of this town). My immediate family lives 800 miles away. After my Dh and I were married 3 months he got a job transfer to Charlotte.... this was about 4 years ago. Over the weekend all my family except for me got together for easter and a wedding shower, all of my cousins have been posting photos from the events on Facebook and commenting to each other how much fun it all was. I am just a crying, sad mess tonight. Please tell me that as the years pass this gets easier.

 

[rina900]

Honestly, in our case, no. We moved to Miami for 2 yrs and being away from family was very hard for us. We moved back to NJ and now live across the street from my parents.

 

[java]

Well we moved away- and then surprise my Dad moved 5 minutes away from our house(we're in NJ He was in CA!! went through a divorce and decided hey I'll go live near them)
So while you think you're all alone. trust me it won't last!

(((disneylover83)) remember people lie on facebook - you're only hearing the good stuff. You need to call your siblings to find out what really happened. Call the one that complains! You'll feel better!

 

[Melissa<3Disney]

So all my family lives in Florida. My boyfriend got a great job offer a year ago here in San Diego. So we picked up and left. I had never been more than a six hour drive from my parents and never lived outside Florida. When we first moved here, I hated it!! I wanted to be near my family and friends so bad it hurt. But as time went on, we just embraced the change! We know we eventually want to move back to the east coast, but who knows where the job will take us! We have really used this opportunity to explore new things, make new friends, and really learn how to step outside our comfort zones. I really do feel like it gets easier! Just hang in there!! I still talk to my family atleast a couple times a week! We are flying home in a couple of months for a week and half of vacation time, and we are doing Disney with them in October. Plus once I go home and be around my family for a week, i'm ready to go back across the country to my solitude! haha

 

[FireDancer]

I moved away from my friends and family for two years when I went from OH to FL for a job. I was ready to go home after about a year and just as the time was coming to make a decision on my apt lease after the second year a company in Cleveland headhunted me.

I was glad I make the move down but I never did adjust. That doesn't mean if a job opportunity came up again I wouldn't take it but I would rather stay here.

Some people adjust and some don't. If you aren't one of them there isn't anything wrong with that. Better to try it and decide you don't like it then sit around the same town wondering what if.

 

[Sleepy]

It has been almost 6 years since we moved away. It was extremely difficult, but we have internet and Vonage, which gives us free phone calls, so we don't feel quite so separated.

We try to visit as often as we can. The expense of plane tickets prevents us from traveling as much as we want. Goes both ways actually. We just make the best of it when we can. It is still difficult....mostly during times of emergencies and holidays, etc.

Time does pass quickly.

ETA: I also grew up in a military family. Maybe that makes a difference in acceptance. When I was a kid we moved to the West coast and had no family close to us. My parents and I are able to accept that this is just a part of military life. I know one day our son will be moving out. Most likely he will be nowhere near us. Perhaps in Europe while we are in America. We accept that. Will be sad, but you go where the job takes you.

 

[monorailsilver]

I am not as far away as you are from your family & I hate it.

I have always lived in CT and still do.

My parents & one of my sisters (& neices) live about an hour from me. It wouldn't be so bad but the traffic is a nightmare. Last night it took us nearly 2 hours to get home.

In the summer I go there once a week & if my dh goes away for work I stay over.

In the winter my parents come here-2 of my kids are in school & I work on Sunday & Saturdays are either sports or my dh working on the Money Pit we live in.

I have lost touch with friends but am thankful for Facebook.

My IL's all live the next town over, basically they are 5 min away. Too close. They are not helpful in any way so I think that is part of the reason why I hate where I live most days.

I miss alot of parties, etc...because of it. I can't just go to a Friday night party on a school day because by the time my kids get home & we leave, traffic will already be backed up in New Haven, CT.

I have made some new friends in the 10 years I have been here but it is still hard not to be home.

 

[Nik's Mom]

I know how you feel. We moved from Los Angeles 2 years ago. DH's family always has huge celebrations. We make it a point to call during the party so we can talk to everyone. It's nice at that moment because we can tell how happy everyone is. But after the call, it sets in how alone we are.

The good news is that feeling quickly passes and we are reminded how much our lives have improved since we moved!

 

[wdwmom0f3]

We moved from Alabama to North Carolina & then to Lexington, KY and back to Alabama. While moving is fun, being away from family is not. We had to plan all vacations around school & coming home. I think the hardest thing was with the children though & not having any help at all, plus I felt like I was left out too. We are about an hour & 1/2 from them now and it is much better. Just close enough.

When we were away, we just made the best of it. That's all you can do. Call and chat online to stay connected and get home as often as you can. Also invite others to come visit you as often as you can. You can make some really fun memories. We still laugh about some of the things that happened on the road trips to & from, and funny little things while we visited or they were with us. They seem to stand out above some of our normal day to day memories.

I wish you the very best!!

 

[GeorgeG]

We moved from New York to Florida when I retired and just about all our family is still in the Northeast. Our move was good for both of us in many, many ways. There are time when my wife misses her family and times when she's glad she's 1,100 miles away. My family is a little more scattered so we didn't get to see each other that often.

I suppose a lot depends on individual needs, but in this age of free long distance phone calls and the Internet, people can keep in touch almost constantly. Visits can be more special when you don't see each other that often. You never know what life will throw at you so it's important to be able to adapt. I do know we would never consider moving back to New York and some of our family will eventually move to Florida.

 

[DisneyLover83]

Thanks for everyones kind words! I took java's advice and called my Dsis this morning and hearing about all the behind the scenes he said/she said large family BS I feel a lot better

 

[bigbabyblues]

Thanks for everyones kind words! I took java's advice and called my Dsis this morning and hearing about all the behind the scenes he said/she said large family BS I feel a lot better

Glad you're feeling better about things! There are times, especially after spending too many hours with the IL's that live 5 minutes away (like yesterday, lol), that I think I'd love to move away!

Seriously though, I know I'd hate moving too far. When I got married, I moved about 1/2 hour or so away from my own family and I had trouble adjusting to that.

 

[Cherbear013]

I moved from MN to CO about 6 years ago. I met my fiance here and we plan to live here for a little bit. His family is in CA. I feel like I'm missing everything back home with my family and friends. I would even move near his parents to be near family. Just haven't found friends like I have at home.

 

[SOnotLayuh]

I checked out this thread because we plan to immigrate to Canada in about 7 years, and I'm worried that I will miss my family. We're all close.

However - welcome to Charlotte! I love it here! Moved away for 5 years and then came back a couple of months ago!