Family Trip issues

[Natterjack9]

I hope I put this in the correct area. If not, please feel free to move it.

I have a family trip planned for April. 10 people in all; my wife and I, my mother and father-in-law, brother-in-law and his wife for starters. My kids, 14 and 9 who are Disney veterans, and my nephews, 4 and 2 for their first trip.

We are staying at the THV all together. We are used to close quarters at my in-laws cottage so I am not worried at all about space issues. My wife and I are the DVC members, and we are using our points to cover the room costs.

Here is the problem. My brother and sister-in-law have run into a bit of a financial issue over the last couple of weeks, and it is very possible they may not go. I feel bad for them, but I am planning on going anyway. My kids have been looking forward to going home to SSR and the THV since I booked the trip at our 11 month window. Am I wrong? The reason I ask is I have been getting some comments and believe that they are hinting that we should cancel the whole trip. Keep in mind, we are using our points for the trip, and my kids and I are bouncing off the walls ready to go Do we still go, or do I cancel the whole thing since they are more than likely not able to go with us now due to their financial troubles? What does everyone think?

My thought is there will be more trips we can take. As far as I am concerned, the trip is on regardless of who is going. Am I wrong?

 

[alanapapa]

I would still go. That way if the finances work themselves out your in DBIL and family would have a place. Would DFIL and DM(DMIL?) still go without DBIL and family? Remind them there is a lot to do even with going to the parks.

 

[Natterjack9]

I would still go. That way if the finances work themselves out your in DBIL and family would have a place. Would DFIL and DM(DMIL?) still go without DBIL and family? Remind them there is a lot to do even with going to the parks.

DMIL and DFIL would both still go as well. In fact, our last couple of trips to SSR they have been a part of the vacation. They have as much fun as we do. I wish that things were different, but the trip is going to be on. If they are able to make it, they can meet us down there, if not, we can catch them on the next visit. I know that it's o.k., guess I just need to hear it from someone else. Just irks me a bit that they are hinting that maybe we shouldn't go since they can't.

 

[alanapapa]

Lets hope it all works out.


If not, can I start off the list of volunteers to use the extra room?

 

[Chuck S]

Ah, the joys of vacation planning with extended family. I'm sorry that your your BIL and SIL are having financial problems, but why should that have an impact on your vacation? If they can't go, it just means a little more elbow room for everyone else in the Treehouse.

Usually, when I take friends and family, we book studios for each group. That way if someone HAS to cancel, I can bank the points. I always plan group trips so they fall within my banking window and give the other parties a cancellation deadline...with the understanding that if they cancel for anything short of an emergency, they are not invited back. And some friends were shocked to find out that DS wanting to go to a classmates birthday party is not an emergency.

 

[christa112]

Why should you guys have cancel your vacation because of their situation? You are using your points for the vacation and your kids are super excited to be going.

 

[tjkraz]

When inviting family, the approach I usually take is to say that "we have room for extra people and you are welcome to come along if you wish."

In other words, it's not YOUR or OUR trip...it's MY trip and you can either choose to come or not to come.

No way I would change my plans.

I don't know how much they already have invested in the trip and/or how much more it would cost them to make the trip. But you may want to point out them that they don't have to spend thousands of dollars on theme park tickets and Disney restaurants in order to come. I assume you are offering them free accommodations for the week. The room has a full kitchen so the can cook meals for the same amount it would cost at home. With Disney's new Give a Day, Get a Day promotion, the parents could do a day of volunteer work between now and the trip and get free admission to one of the parks. The 2 year old is free so the only issue would be the 4 year old (needs a ticket but too young for the volunteer program.)

Visiting Downtown Disney is free. Visiting other resorts is free. Riding the monorail and Disney boats is free. The Community Hall is free. The pools at SSR (there are 5) are free to guests. They can play tennis and basketball for free.

Unless there are expensive plane tickets which have not been purchased, it seems like they could still come along if they wish. It may not be the trip they envisioned, but at least it will be a Florida vacation away from home with sun, swimming and many other activities. The main question is whether their pride will allow them to go that route.

Regardless, I wouldn't let their situation impact your plans.

 

[eliza61]

Ah, the joys of vacation planning with extended family. I'm sorry that your your BIL and SIL are having financial problems, but why should that have an impact on your vacation. If they can't go, it just means a little more elbow room for everyone else in the Treehouse.
.

Chuck, we should all get together and write a book!!

Op, I would still go. You can reiterate with your SIl & BIL that the great thing about owning dvc is that you can plan many more vacations. tell them how much better they will feel when they go and are on more solid financial footing.

Also, it's a little ratty that they are making you feel bad about going on a vacation simply because they can't afford to go.

 

[rocketriter]

Not sure why the other family's problems mean you should cancel you end of the trip. We used to have a similar problem in our family ("If I go out of town, the rest of you can't go to a movie without me because it might be something I want to see, too") until I put a stop to it. You're responsible for your end of things. They're responsible for their end of things. They don't get to throw a wet blanket over your end. Don't let them guilt-trip you.

 

[DebbieB]

I don't understand why they would expect you to cancel, you are using your points. If you were using their points it would be different. Do you think they are hinting at helping them out financially so that they could afford to go?

 

[Muushka]

Am I wrong?

In a word, no.

 

[crisi]

Your trip has to be on, in some form, regardless of who is going. You have points, you use them or lose them. This isn't a situation where you can cancel out of sympathy and not end up shorted (you might be able to bank your points, etc., but at some point, you have to spend those points).

 

[TiszBear]

I would continue to go. You can not help that your brother/sister inlaw have run into financial troubles. They are not your responsibilty. What does yoru wife think?

I would also talk to you all the adults going and tell them since this vacation has been planned for the last 11 months or so that the trip is still on. Tell them you are sorry for the problems that have come up but since you are using your DVC points they have to be used or you will lose them. Offer them a trip in the future when their situation changes but tell them you don't think it is fiar of them to put you in this position.

It is never easy traveling with extended family but I have found if you lay out the rules and confront the problems up front and head on you have a better chance of not alienting those that are causign problems.

Good Luck.

 

[RLRDA]

I agree with what has been said so far. You were nice enough to invite your family along but it is, after all, your DVC membership that would be providing the accomodations. Your family is looking forward to the trip and your family should enjoy it! As you said - there will be future opportunities for them to travel to WDW with you. It's sad that they would make comments essentially giving you a hard time about it (not the best way to be invited back with you ) I hope you have a great trip!

 

[disneynutz]

The more people involved, friends, or family, the more potential for problems. We have learned not to invite others if we want to have a good time. It may seem like a good idea and it looks good on TV, but in reality, life is more complex.

Some of our favorite people watching has been large family groups and how they talk about each other when split up.

Have a wonderful vacation and don't think twice about it.

Bill

 

[Deb & Bill]

Enjoy your trip and tell the BIL and family that you would be glad for them to join you on a trip in the future.

 

[emlutz23]

Enjoy your trip and tell the BIL and family that you would be glad for them to join you on a trip in the future.

This is exactly what I was going to write as well!

You should still go but tell them that they will be the first ones you ask to accompany you on your next trip!

 

[dianeschlicht]

I'm confused. Are THEY telling you to cancel the whole trip???? I can't imagine someone doing that, and I can't imagine my self, as owner of the points, even considering it. It's your timeshare, your points, YOUR TRIP! If they choose not to go, then that's too bad, but they should NOT suggest that you suffer along with them.

 

[Julylady]

I had a similar situation happen two years ago. We had plans to go with my brother and his family in November and he lost his job in late August. After much consideration, we modified the trip so that they could still attend. They had already purchased airline tickets so they would have lost out big time by cancelling all together. I decided to rent a car so that we could go to the grocery store. My brother was not aware that I would not have rented a car had this situation not occured. We cooked almost all of our meals in the unit. I gave his kids park tickets as Christmas/Birthday gifts. My Mom allowed him to paint her basement in exchange for his and my sister-in-law's tickets. It was a "no frills" trip, but we still had a great time.

I am grateful that we were in a position financially to help him out to the extent we did.

 

[edk35]

Keep your trip. You are the DVC member and like someone else said....it is your trip too. It is not like it is a family emergency that maybe you guys should stay back too, but don't. Something like that could stir the family pot....but heck...it is your trip and your children deserve to go. I feel bad for them and their kids but they can go next time.