Family Member Flop :-(

Nparrotte

His destructive programming is taking effect. He w
Joined
Dec 16, 2008
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DW and I planned a week at the THV. As a wedding gift to my brother and his wife we invited them to come and purchased their 7 day park hopper passes. Brother hasn't been to Disney in 15 years, his wife has never been. In the months leading up to the trip they were very excited about the parks and spending time at WDW. Returned home last night, and confirmed we will never invite them again. SIL only went into the parks a couple times and would only stay a couple hours...the parks were keeping her away from the pool. I am disappointed things turned out the way they did. DW and I love the parks and the experience on a whole. I feel slighted because she didn't give the parks a chance and just kept saying she didn't want to leave the pool. We love the pool too and usually spend a couple hours each day swimming and relaxing. She could have just told us 6 months ago she would prefer to sit by the pool and not do the parks, we would have understood. In addition to the lack of enthusiasm no gratitude was shown either.
 
Everyone has their own idea of what a "vacation" is--my only complaint would be that you bought the seven day hopper when it appears she only needed a two or three day non-hopper. Did your brother go to the parks with you or stay with his wife?

Not being grateful is not ok, however; did they pay for anything? Or did you provide all of their meals and drinks too? Who paid for transportation?

In any event, chalk it up to a learning experience and you certainly have the right to not invite them again if you didn't enjoy vacationing with them.
 
I'm sorry your vacation did not turn out as planned. We've been there before, as I am sure many DVC members have. Sadly, most people just don't understand what is being GIVEN to them ...... it is a gift. Perhaps your brother understood the situation, but just went along with his DW plans to keep the peace. I hope it doesn't change relations within your family .... only future vacation plans.
 
It is definitely different when someone else pays for your park admissions, if her and her husband had paid for the tickets they might have felt different.

I do usually try to talk very in depth about expectations before going to WDW with anyone, so there is no confusion. But, there are certain people I do not plan on going to WDW with...I just know it would end up being a miserable experience. Now, with that being said, I do see my wife wanting to do it eventually and quite honestly I will just sit back and do my own thing. :rotfl:
 

Ya'know ... sometimes you just can't predict when your body might tell you, "Crash now!" Various stresses (work, wedding, family vacations, etc.) accumulate -- and at some point the body just gives. Perhaps your SIL received her body's signal to crash when she encountered a lounge chair with the perfect mix of sun/shade near the pool. If she came away from the trip more relaxed and rested than when she arrived -- then you gave her exactly the gift she really needed.
 
:goodvibes I'm sorry you were disappointed. Disney parks just simply aren't for everyone. I know only a few people, other than here, who can handle the parks like I can.
 
Now, with that being said, I do see my wife wanting to do it eventually and quite honestly I will just sit back and do my own thing. :rotfl:

:rotfl:
 
I am sorry you were disappointed, but honestly I think it is unrealistic to expect others to feel the same we do about anything. To some being excited about the parks means a few hours there.

If your gift came with strings attached as to how and when they should enjoy the vacation, not sure it was a gift.

They defnitely should have thanked you and it is defnitely your right never to invite them again.
 
Live and learn I suppose, while we can't expect everyone to be as Disney enthusiastic as us, it did sound like they were up for it leading up to the trip. Maybe since it was a wedding gift she didn't feel it would be right to say that it wasn't her kind of thing.
 
I could have said the same thing about DH the first time I went with him. Still - I keep bringing him along! :lmao:
 
Obviously the park hopper was an unnecessary expense, but maybe doing the few hours in the parks, with a nice pool, staying in a super-cool treehouse is just the vacation she was looking for. Just because she enjoyed different aspects of the trip than you normally do doesn't mean she didn't enjoy the trip.

Totally with you on the lack of gratitude, though. That's messed up.
 
I always try to go to WDW with little to no exceptions when traveling with others. I always set the ground rules, EVERYONE does what they want to do on VACATION. I find when we go to WDW in Feb we are in the parks a lot, when I went in May it was just to darn hot, and the pool called my everyday by 1:00! Other then cruising I find WDW as one of the easiest vacations to take with other people due to all the transportation options, things to do or not to do and easy dining. I think you will find that if you go with little to no expectations of others you will have a better time.

As far as the park hoppers go, that is a bummer! We try to talk to our guests in detail to find out how much time they really plan on going to the parks, and we have found that the people who have not ever been to WDW or in a very long time are much better off getting MYW passes and doing 1 park a day, either they want to see everything in the park that day or they are overwhelmed.

Sorry you were disappointed!
 
I have to fight my inner turmoil when my brother and BIL spend more time by the pool than in the parks, and they buy their own park tickets. But, it goes against every planning instinct in my body to pay that much for a ticket and not use it all to the max.

It's taken me a few years to get over the fact that it's their vacation too, and while I love the parks, they prefer to rest and relax on vacation(go figure). The other thing that I had to get over was the hurt feelings that I was getting that they weren't enjoying something I loved so much.

Now, I just focus on what I want to do and see, and if they want to join or not join, it's all good. I understand how frustrating it is that you spent your money on the tickets that they really didn't use to the full potential. But look at it this way, they did have a good time on this trip, right? People who don't do the planning and spending just don't get just how expensive it actually is.
 
She could have just told us 6 months ago she would prefer to sit by the pool and not do the parks, we would have understood

Totally agree with you here. Sounds like you detailed discussions ahead of time and she should have spoken up and said that she would rather just just hang around the pool.
 
We took my sister and her husband. And when we did, we knew going in that he would be difficult. Hence, his attitude only bothered us a little bit, and we let him do his thing. The lack of gratitude thing was tough, but its "just him" and I got time with my sister out of the trip, which was important to me.

We give our guests two options, they can try and keep up with us, or they can do their own thing. We offer a hybrid approach - keep up with us for two or three days, with hoppers, you won't stop, but at the end you'll have a complete highlight trip and understand how things are laid out and how to get around. The rest of the vacation is yours and if you want to continue to stick with us, we'll slow things down, go back and do some things twice, and see some of the attractions that didn't make the first "mad dash" cut. But we understand after three or four days if you collapse by the pool or just shop in Epcot every day.
 
I know how you feel. On this exact day, May 16th last year we used our points to provide my best friend and her kids a 1 bedroom villa at Kidani. It was their first visit and I had every minute planned so they would see as much as humanly possible in 6 days. Well by day 3 all she wanted to do was sit at the pool. To each their own I guess. She's not the go, go, go type like me. Now I know in the future if we ever go to Disney together again, I won't expect her to hit the parks like we do.
 
The first time we took our adult sons/daughters in law with us, I was shocked at how little time they wanted to be in the parks. It was the pool and PI.

However, once I embraced their vacation style, I found I preferred it to mine. Now I do the same thing. My husband golfs . If we are on an adult only vacation, we average less than 2 hours a day inside a park. I'd much rather hang at the pool or go to the spa.
 
Last week was a very different Disney trip for us. The weather was too hot -- in the 90's when we were used to upper 60's. I also got a huge blister on my foot (never ever before in my crocs). We couldn't keep up our usual pace in the parks. Had to spend more time at the resort (AKL savanna view value studio), did more resort activities. And you know what? It was a good, maybe not great, but still good trip.

Different trips mean different things. Not all people love commando.
 
You gave your family members a GIFT, it is not your say to what they do with the GIFT. They may feel they got value out of the GIFT, although you didn't.
 
I think one of the great things about DVC is the resorts, we love hanging out at the resorts :banana: Our typical 10 day trip (during the summer) usually amounts to 4 hours of Park Time in morning, back for lunch and pool, then back out for dinner and parks at night. We will usually take a couple days just hanging out at the pools during the day (especially when we are at the Beach Cub).

We have taken friends and family with us and it has worked out very well (although we have chosen carefully who we have taken). We also let those who are going know up front that they can go along with us or choose to do their own thing, whatever they want. That way expectations are established early on.
 












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