Families that go Trick-or-treating but don't hand out candy?

[mickeywho?]

So basically there are two types of people: those who give out candy because they enjoy kids and like giving, and there are those who give out candy because it's quid pro quo and their kids are trick or treating that particular year. Will the people who keep score give out candy once their kids are grown?

They might...but they may ask for ID first just in case they're from out of town...

Good grief! I've read some crazy stuff on the dis over the years but this thread just boggles the mind!

 

[lemondog]

I've noticed for the past few years that my neighbors across the street go out trick-or-treating (all 4 kids and both parents accompany them) but they don't have anyone stay at their house to give out candy. I also know they don't leave out a bowl of candy because I've got a clear view of their door.

I guess you could say that it all evens out since I don't have any kids, but I still give out candy. Personally, I think that if you're going to be taking candy from others then you should be giving out candy also.

What do you think?

Nope. We go out trick or treating with our kids, so no one is home to give out candy. I am not leaving out a bowl, either, since it's mostly older kids who are in our neighborhood and they would clear out the bowl in one fell swoop.

 

[Aristomommy]

Usually one of us hands out candy and the other one goes with the kids. I always think of it as a candy swap in the neighborhood since we bring home a lot and give out a lot. We do get people from streets without sidewalks or rural areas which is fine also.

This year dd does not want to go and dh will be out of town. Trying to figure out what to do. I don't want dd to stay by herself but I don't want not to give out candy either..... Maybe someone will take ds along and I will stay with dd.

 

[ratlenhum]

We always go out. I never leave anyone at home to hand out candy. Why should either DH or I miss out on fun with my son. I don't leave a bowl out because chances are the first kid to my house is going to take the whole bowl. When we get home, we answer the door and hand out candy. We come across plenty of houses with no one home while out trick or treating and just assume that those families are out doing the same thing.

Last year we started trick or treating at the local Tanger Outlet. It's awesome. The participating stores have a picture of a pumpkin on the door. You only go in the stores with the sign. Lots of kids, very public, very safe, and they have a food court, a McDonalds and bathrooms!

 

[ratlenhum]

Why am I the bad guy? We leave a bowl on the porch or one of us stays back to give candy to the neighbor kids. I think it's bad Trick or Treating manners otherwise. Would I be a better person if I turned out my light and had my kids take everyone else's candy without reciprocating?

You do realize by leaving a bowl out you are making one or two kids REALLY happy and leaving a lot of other disappointed kids who run up to the house to find the empty bowl.

 

[Hannathy]

You do realize by leaving a bowl out you are making one or two kids REALLY happy and leaving a lot of other disappointed kids who run up to the house to find the empty bowl.

nope sorry most kids are really honest and don't take the whole bowl. and many on this thread have said the same thing. for 1 thing if they are in their neighborhood it is people they know and the kids they would be shorting are kids they know. And word would get back as far as who did it.

 

[ratlenhum]

Apparently you aren't familiar with parents chit chatting at the bus stop. How many TOTers did you get, how many bags did you end up buying, how's everything going, did you get your lawn mower fixed, have you used your heat yet this year, can you BELIEVE the property taxes this year...

People don't compare notes? What do you do at the bus stop? You don't send your kids UNSUPERVISED do you? lol Some people may just ignore their neighbors or others may chitchat about what goes on in the neighborhood or around life. I brought my practice test to the bus stop and asked one of the othere parents to explain a problem to me. It's whatever, we are friends, so I guess we do compare notes sometimes.

My son's bus picks him up right in front of our house. Thank God I don't have to go stand out there. We just go out when we see it pull up then I don't have to stand around and deal with all the neighborhood gossip. Most parents in my neighborhood work, have other kids to care for and things to do and get to the bus stop with very little time to spare, or the sitter is bringing them. No time to gossip about the neighbors.

 

[disneychrista]

nope sorry most kids are really honest and don't take the whole bow.

Yeah the ones whose parents are with them. The 13yo's ToT by themselves are taking the whole bowl.

 

[ratlenhum]

because the community isn't paying for it the neighbors are. If the people in the other towns want to go to the mall and trick or treat or go to the downtown stores where businesses are giving it out go for it but to come into neighborhoods and take the candy that is for the kids who live there and know each other I feel is wrong. If I could buy just for the neighborhood kids I could buy much bigger bars but since w always get 50 to 100 from outside we have to get smaller sizes. do you at least rotate neighborhoods each year so the same one doesn't get hit each year?

You should just start making parents show their ID when they come to the door to make sure they are from your neighborhood.

I feel bad for the kid who moves in the week before Halloween getting dirty looks all over his new neighborhood because nobody thinks he belongs there.

Buy bigger bars for your neighborhood kids and the cheapest stuff for the invaders. Maybe if you give them crap they'll mark you off on their community chart and not come back to your house next year


I think some of these neighborhoods need to hand out Prozac or Zoloft for the parents. Geez.....

 

[jemmouse]

Both my DH and myself go out with our son along with the neighboring parents. We have one house where the grandma lives there and all us neighbors give her our candy and she passes it out. We leave a note on our door saying candy is down the street. And then of course we give that grandma a special treat for being so kind and helping us out..

 

[ratlenhum]

Yeah the ones whose parents are with them. The 13yo's ToT by themselves are taking the whole bowl.

No, they won't take it. they will be too worried about little Billy down the street who does in fact live in the neighborhood not getting candy from that one house. Billy might tell his mom that Mrs. X had an empty bowl on her stoop and that Big Johnny was last seen walking away from the door. Can you imagine the bus stop fiasco the next morning. OMG......the drama of it all.

 

[disneychrista]

No, they won't take it. they will be too worried about little Billy down the street who does in fact live in the neighborhood not getting candy from that one house. Billy might tell his mom that Mrs. X had an empty bowl on her stoop and that Big Johnny was last seen walking away from the door. Can you imagine the bus stop fiasco the next morning. OMG......the drama of it all.

Oh yes, you are right. Big Johnny would never do that to little Billy.

 

[allison443]

We were talking about back when they were all young of course not now. just pointing out that in some neighborhoods if everyone went out with their kids there would be no houses to go to!

Well, I guess you should have thought about that when you moved to that neighborhood....aren't you the one that told the poster who lived in the country that she should have thought about her choice to live with no close neighbors, and as a result no place to trick or treat?

 

[kimblebee]

No, they won't take it. they will be too worried about little Billy down the street who does in fact live in the neighborhood not getting candy from that one house. Billy might tell his mom that Mrs. X had an empty bowl on her stoop and that Big Johnny was last seen walking away from the door. Can you imagine the bus stop fiasco the next morning. OMG......the drama of it all.

 

[jaminmd]

You should just start making parents show their ID when they come to the door to make sure they are from your neighborhood.

I feel bad for the kid who moves in the week before Halloween getting dirty looks all over his new neighborhood because nobody thinks he belongs there.

Buy bigger bars for your neighborhood kids and the cheapest stuff for the invaders. Maybe if you give them crap they'll mark you off on their community chart and not come back to your house next year


I think some of these neighborhoods need to hand out Prozac or Zoloft for the parents. Geez.....

As a child, I grew up in the country. Houses spread far apart & no safe place to walk to ToT. My mother used to drive us to the nearest neighborhood so we could ToT. We were kids and it was about having fun.

Now I live in a big neighborhood, give out bags of candy each year (and did for years before I even had a child). Before DD was born I used to give out large bags filled with candy, pencils & little toys. I hope I'm absolved of my sin of ToT'ing outside my geographical area as a child.

Seriously, if it bothers you that much, just don't participate. It's about letting kids have fun, not keeping score.

 

[aprilgail2]

Yeah the ones whose parents are with them. The 13yo's ToT by themselves are taking the whole bowl.

You do realize by leaving a bowl out you are making one or two kids REALLY happy and leaving a lot of other disappointed kids who run up to the house to find the empty bowl.

We have NEVER had that happen--if I leave a bowl out I come home and there is still candy in the bowl. When I would be out with my daughter trick or treating there were bowls left on steps all over the place and rarely would there be one that was empty! Don't know what kind or area you live in!!

 

[Ceila]

You do realize by leaving a bowl out you are making one or two kids REALLY happy and leaving a lot of other disappointed kids who run up to the house to find the empty bowl.

Yeah the ones whose parents are with them. The 13yo's ToT by themselves are taking the whole bowl.

While that might be YOUR experience, there are quite a few on this thread that have clearly stated that they have different experiences. Now I'll add myself to that list. We've left bowls out before and have come back to only half-empty bowls. Obviously no kid dumped the whole lot into their bag. And while taking my kids around, I've seen other bowls left out that weren't emptied all over the neighborhood. Why can't you realize that some places are different??

And Christa, that's a pretty nasty blanket statement to make about all 13 year olds. Do you not realize that MOST teens are good, honest kids, or are you one of those who assumes that all teens are rude? If so, let me tell you, they're not the one who is rude.

 

[Michelle and crew]

lol, even "nice" neighborhoods have ornery kids. Our bowl was never emptied here, but when we lived right in town, our pumpkins were always smashed. Believe it or not, it was even a nice neighborhood.

Whoever suggested the prozac hit the ball on the head. I can't imagine fussing so much about who is giving out candy, who is taking the kids out, etc. Give out candy if you like, turn off the light if you don't. I am eternally grateful not to have some people for neighbors. I've always been pretty lucky. Friendly people who watch out for oneanother, rather than watching to see how we might screw up. Everyone does. Even you perfect peoples.

 

[ajk912]

No, I wasn't talking about the neighbors, I was referring to where you said either you or your dh stays home and gives out candy, while the other takes the kids trick or treating. Then you said you get annoyed when someone comes to your home for candy, when they didn't give any candy to your kids.
How does the parent at home know who gave out candy to their kids? they weren't going around with the kids. So does the parent who took the kids around compare notes with the parent who stayed home? You know, we went to Johnny's and they weren't home, did Johnny come here? etc.

You are over thinking it. You don't need to compare notes with your spouse at home, since you are out and about TOTing and you run into a friend of your kids', you would know you can stop by their house for candy as well.

My son's bus picks him up right in front of our house. Thank God I don't have to go stand out there. We just go out when we see it pull up then I don't have to stand around and deal with all the neighborhood gossip. Most parents in my neighborhood work, have other kids to care for and things to do and get to the bus stop with very little time to spare, or the sitter is bringing them. No time to gossip about the neighbors.

Actually, every single one of us at the bus stop works, is looking for a job, or goes to college. We just make sure the kids get on the bus safely OR asks one of the other moms to watch out for our kids.

No, they won't take it. they will be too worried about little Billy down the street who does in fact live in the neighborhood not getting candy from that one house. Billy might tell his mom that Mrs. X had an empty bowl on her stoop and that Big Johnny was last seen walking away from the door. Can you imagine the bus stop fiasco the next morning. OMG......the drama of it all.

You guys joke..but I can't imagine we are the only block on the planet that can act like Wisteria Lane sometimes! It keeps life interesting I think. But like Wisteria Lane, the talk at times is petty BUT the huge upside is I have many friends I can count on, right here, in a pinch.

 

[luvsJack]

My word!! I will be glad when Halloween is over! I never knew that so much thought went in to the "proper way to trick or treat". We just grab a bag and go. We go to the neighborhood in town that ENJOYS having other kids come into their area. They get a big kick out of it and dress up and decorate for it, even "haunt" their walkways, driveways and porches. My dsis used to haunt her 1/5 mile driveway just to GET kids from all over the county to come and trick or treat her house.

I cannot imagin being so stuffy as to give a rat's behind which kid lives where and what I give them. Nor do I care if the Smith's down the street took their little ones out and didn't leave anyone behind to hand out candy (that you can buy yourself at the local WalMart, btw, if it is really that big of a deal to you)

Just think that empty house means that there are parents out with and having fun with their kids. On my planet that is GOOD thing.

Comparing notes at the bus stop?? Really? You are serious? Somebody needs to get a life and QUICK!

Talk about parents turning something fun into something ridiculous!!

If this keeps up Halloween is going to rate right up there with politics and relegion on the Dis!