Estimates-why does my husband have to be there?

[siouxi31]

I'm calling window replacement companies for estimates and most of them are asking for my husband and I to be present at the time of the estimate.
Why do they do this? It's rare that we're both home at the same time and when we are that time is usually unpredictable. My husband is a loan officer which requires him to work nights and I work during the day. It's not even a sure thing to have us together on the weekends.
So what's up with this? Should I tell them to kiss my behind or I do I need to obey their command?

 

[Chuck S]

Tell them that you are sorry that their silly demand has cost them your business.

 

[laura001]

I have run into this a few times, one time in particular with calling for quotes on garage doors, the guy insisted on speaking with my DH who in turn told the guy that I handle all of that stuff....guess what I told the guy after that? I would never use someone that was not happy with me taking care of it, it is none of their business as long as you have the money. I would search the whole world over to find someone to do it before I would cave in....that is MHO

 

[Marseeya]

My first thought is that it's to protect the salesman from accusations of impropriety.

 

[Blondy876]

We've been getting a lot of estimates lately and have found this to be common. I hate it!!! For us, in the end it will be my dh and his father (a carpenter) who make the decisions. They have more knowledge about these things than I do. However, most companies will not come and give an estimate if we aren't both here. I was told that this is so they can get you to go with them immediately instead of having to discuss it with your spouse. It just makes me mad and we usually end up not going with them.

 

[siouxi31]

I have run into this a few times, one time in particular with calling for quotes on garage doors, the guy insisted on speaking with my DH who in turn told the guy that I handle all of that stuff....guess what I told the guy after that? I would never use someone that was not happy with me taking care of it, it is none of their business as long as you have the money. I would search the whole world over to find someone to do it before I would cave in....that is MHO

That's exactly how I feel. Is it because I'm the woman calling? Would they have expected me to be available if my husband called? This is MY thing. They're ticking me off. I know they feel like it's a surer sale if both of us are there but I can't help but think that it's because I'm a woman. The biggest thing that makes me mad is that I'M THE BREADWINNER. It's MY money (OK, well mostly my money).

 

[daisyduck123]

They want you both there so that you can't put them off by saying, "Oh, I need to check with my spouse...we'll get back to you". They want your answer & they want to book the work right then & there.

 

[hiwaygal]

My guess is the reason they do this is because after one of you has seen their offer, you will usually say "I need to talk this over with my spouse to make a decision"...they don't want you to have that extra time to mull over their offer...they want you to sign on the dotted line when they come. It's a sales tactic.

You could tell them that you are only seeking estimates and will make your decision with your husband within a certain amount of time...if they don't like that arrangement then you can always take your business elsewhere.

 

[msklcassidy]

I guess they expect you to be at home vaccuumming your home in your pearls and a dress too! I'd let them know that 1) YOU dictate the terms of the business relationship and that 2) YOU know that you don't want to deal with them since they are obviously too intimidated by a woman!

In reality, they do this because they hope to 1) answer all your questions right away and 2) get a signed contract before the leave. NEVER, never, never, never (have I said never) sign a contract without thinking about it for a day or so and shopping around.

In all honesty, my dad is a contractor. I told him about this and he said "well, she's probably dealing with a chain like Thomas or Dalco or Sears. Instead, go to your local hardware store (NOT BIG BOX) and ask them who they know who does window replacements. Ask your neighbors and look in local papers then call the BBB. I told him what my response was and he laughed and agreed that they would be too intimidated to deal with responses 1 and 2!

 

[siouxi31]

They want you both there so that you can't put them off by saying, "Oh, I need to check with my spouse...we'll get back to you". They want your answer & they want to book the work right then & there.

It's just not going to matter anyway because I'm getting estimates from more than one company. Sheesh, you'd think they would know that.
Well, I have one company coming tonight and I told them that we'd both be here but we're not going to be. My husband said he won't go out of his way to come to the house for an estimate. I can't wait to find out what will happen.

 

[minniecarousel]

They want you both there so that you can't put them off by saying, "Oh, I need to check with my spouse...we'll get back to you". They want your answer & they want to book the work right then & there.

Do they really think that people don't get multiple estimates? I rarely go with just one estimate on pricey stuff!

 

[Dan Murphy]

.......Should I tell them to kiss my behind.....

Yes..

 

[MrsToad]

I got the feeling it was less to do with possible "impropriety" and more to do with them wanting both halves of the couple there so the salesperson wouldn't be "wasting their time if both halves of the couple didn't believe the work was necessary." This was hinted at by a female salesperson giving me a quote on gutters. She said she wasn't supposed to come out unless both of us were home. Even with this explanation, it still feels like there is a "we must deal with the husband" attitude on the part of too many salespersons.

FWIW, I also tell the salespeople that DH works long hours and they will deal with me in the planning stages or I will find someone else (DH very much prefers it this way, too).

Added: oops, I see a lot of people have posted similar thoughts while I was typing - sorry!

 

[pearlieq]

Frankly, anyone who told me that would be welcome to kiss my behind!!!

They're there to provide me a service--they don't get to dictate who is home and I how I make my purchasing decisions!

I agree with the previous poster who said to check for recommendations from neighbors and the BB and look into a mom and pop shop.

 

[Disney Ella]

Every single time someone has said that to me, the "estimate" involved a long sales talk and the thing always cost a lot more than we wanted to spend.

Now if they say they want my husband there, I know it's out of my price range and don't even bother. The reasonably priced companies will come out and give an estimate regardless of who is there.

 

[siouxi31]

Ask your neighbors and look in local papers then call the BBB.

This is large window company in our area. I thought I would get a better deal by going with a company who does this all of the time. I'll check with our local mom/pop hardware store to see what they know.

Now I can't wait to see what happens when this person shows up. They're supposed to be here in 10 minutes. We'll see how it goes.

Thanks everyone for your support. I thought I was crazy.

 

[Obi-Wan Pinobi]

I did inhome sales for a short time in my past (never again). The deal with wanting both spouses there has nothing to do with impropiety and they would request the same thing if the husband was going to be there and not the wife - they would want the wife to be there as well.

Most estimate calls are "One Call Closes". The % of the "we'll think about it and call back" (aka be-backs) compared to people that actually DO that, is extremely extremely small. Statistically 1 out of 500 customers that "want to talk to their spouse" or "think about it" - ever call back. It seemed astronomical to me when I first started doing inhome sales but I soon found it to be true.

You need to remember that these sales people do not make a salary. They are either commission based or 1099 jobs. They do not get travel expenses like gas reimbursements and the few leads they get are "golden" and they have to make sure that they have what they need to close the sale on that visit, and that includes all the members involved in the purchase.

Let's say a wife takes a sales call alone for a kitchen remodel. They go through the pitch which could run the salesperson over 2 hours, she picks a plan that she likes and says "I want to show this to my husband". Her husband may have questions about the service that she cannot answer or that maybe she answers wrong because she misunderstood something. (for instance, maybe the estimate was for granite"like" countertops and she tells her husband it's for granite - he's going to be ticked when the job is done and he doesn't get what he thinks he was getting). The sales person may have to come back out and run through the sales pitch one more time.. another 2 or more hours at their own expense when the odds that the sale will close is rare. (and before you think I'm sexist using the wife scenario, it happens just as often with husbands taking calls without wives who then want to see it for themselves or don't get what they thought they were getting).

Plus, when they do their initial call, a lot of times they will "cut you a special deal" if you sign that night. Say the estimate is 10K - the salesman might say if you sign tonight you can have it for $7,500. Once he leaves he is no longer obligated to give you that price and usually won't extend that "special deal" so you want to be able to sign when a good deal is presented to you, because you might not see it again.

You need to know that a lot of in home sales people can easily go weeks without making one cent because of leads where the people have no intention of purchasing, or they aren't home, or they aren't ready for the presentation and don't have both spouses there. They have to qualify the sales calls as much as they possibly can.

 

[FreshTressa]

I agree....just let them know if they want to do business with you, they will be meeting with you and you alone, and if they have a problem with that, you will go elsewhere. That is an unreasonable request.

 

[luvthatduke]

Trust me, it's not a gender thing (I'm female).
Appleby Windows did this to us, & we fell for it.
The windows are great, I can't say enough good things,
but the salesman, his tactics and the idiots who installed them
will always be remembered by us - in a mighty bad way!

 

[clh2]

I was being given an estimate by a contractor (about 17 years ago) for a complete gutting of a bathroom. One contractor was pretty adament that "when my husband saw the bid, and the quality of work he and his firm did, my husband would really want to go with his company."

I had a problem with that. I bought the house when I was single, and at the time, had just started dating my DH. No - that contractor did not get my business. And, my DH didn't have any input to my decision either.

To the OP - I would be furious about that tactic.