Episcopalians - may I have some advice?

[RadioFanatic]

My dh and I are non-practicing catholics. We're non-practicing b/c dh was molested as a child by a priest. Currently, we are considering converting to Episcopalian - we like their position on woman, pastors being married and homosexuals. We also like that it is close to roman catholicism but not actually roman catholicism.

The reason we are thinking about it now is that we're six months pregnant and really want our child to be baptised and grow up in a religious environment.

I would love to hear from those who can give insight into your religion and what I should expect. We have already talked to the diocese's staff about classes, but I would like to hear the perspective of those who are a part of the community but not an employee, if that makes sense.

Thanks!

 

[What the Heck]

I'm not a practicing Episcapalian now, but that isn't the Church's fault. I was raised that way though. I joke that I was raised "Catholic Light".

Give it a try, if you miss the Catholic Church, or, as a true Episcapalion would say, the Roman Catholic Church, since they consider themselves (Episcapalion's) to be The Catholic Church.

 

[Deb in IA]

I can help!


I was raised in no particular faith tradition. My DH is a lifelong Episcopalian. We were married in an Episcopal service, and I began attending church with him. I joined the church when I was pregnant with DS. Both our chilrdren are baptised Episcopalians and our DD was confirmed last year. I have been a Sunday School teacher, a choir parent, and now, am an active member of the Vestry.

Our children actually attend Catholic school, as it is the only private school option where we live - there are no Episcopal schools. So I am a bit familar with the Catholic tradition as well.

My understanding of the history and emphases of the Episcopal Church is that it is the American branch of the Anglican Communion, which is a world-wide group of churches affiliated with the Church of England. The Church of England, as you may know, was founded by Henry VIII, who had longstanding issues with the soverignity of the Pope, and the wealth of the Roman Catholic church - as well as wanting his divorces. In any event, his daughter, Elizabeth I, decided that the uniformity of the Eucharist was more important than dictating to people what they should personally believe. Thus began the tradition of letting Episcopalians decide for themselves, based on study of the Scriptures, prayer, and reflective thinking, what they should do about issues like abortion, divorce, etc. instead of having a central figure, like the Pope, deciding these issues. The head of the Church of England, the Archbishop of Canterbury, does not play as big of a role in setting policy for the church - witness the recent gathering of the House of Bishops in New Orleans, and the almost non-role the Archbishop played in dealing with the issue of the ordination of gay priests and bishops.

I do like many aspects of the Episcopal church, including the fact we emphasize that all baptised Christians are welcome to receive Communion at our altar. We believe in the Real Presence of Christ in the Host and the wine, but I believe this is just short of Transubstantiation, which is why the Catholics don't allow us to recieve in their church.

This is certainly an interesting time for the Episcopal Church. In our Presiding Bishop Katherine Jefferts Schori we have a stong leader, and I hope this issue of ordination of gay clergy will be resolved so that the entire Anglican Communion, including those in the African churches, who strongly disagree, can understand what it is like to be truly accepted as a child of God.

 

[KirstenB]

I'm a lifelong Episcopalian. I think you'll find the liturgy very familiar. The hymns are traditional, although we've started occasionally singing African spirituals too, which is pretty cool. We have several former Catholics at our church, so I'd imagine you might too.

Dh's parents are lapsed Catholics. One thing that strikes mil is how we have potlucks, picnics, Advent Breakfast, etc. The Episcopal churches are often quite small, so will have one or maybe 2 services a week. Therefore it's easy for us to all get together. I never considered how hard it would be for an entire Catholic Church's membership to get together. She said when she attended church, it might be weeks before she saw someone, because of the different masses, etc. Another difference is we don't have the relationship with Mary that Catholics do. We love and honor her, but we don't pray to her the way my Catholic friends do.

When we were children, no one could take Communion until they had completed Confirmation (similar to First Communion). Now our church says all baptized Christians may take Communion. I was shocked when we had our first child and our priest gave her Communion as a baby. Now I'm used to it, but seeing children take Communion may be different for you too. Best wishes in your spiritual journey!

 

[Camicar]

I was an Episcopalian for 20 years. I managed an Episcopal church for many years and My dh and I were very active in our church's Sunday School, vestry, and many other activites. We left recently only bec we didn't like the local church and its leaders -- nothing to do with the denomination whatsoever. If a nearby Episcopal church met our needs, we would still be in that denomination.

First of all, visit the churches. See if there is one that feels comfortable to you bec all of the 'correct' positions on issues means nothing if you don't have a church 'home'.

Quickly --
1. Different Episcopal churches will have different styles, different congregational make ups, different priest styles, and so on. So if you attend one and it isn't to your liking, do not hesitate to try another. Also do not hesitate to ask questions and feel them out in terms of their views on issues important to you. Whether it's gay clergy ordination or the necessity of being baptized before taking communion, whatever issue is a dealbreaker for you -- ASK about it before you make a commitment of your time, talent, and treasure. I honestly do not know of a single church which would take umbrage at a newcomer asking honest, sincere questions as they try to find the right fit.

2. The Episcopal Church USA is a 'big tent' church, which means that while the official positions on issues may be to your liking, you may very well find that a particular congregation's attitude toward these issues is not. Again, do not hesitate to try another church.

3. During the service, most churches use a bulletin, the 1979 Book of Common Prayer and the Hymnal, the latter two of which are found in the pews. You can purchase a BCP for yourself, which I highly recommend and it contains not only every service, but tons of other information. You will note that the BCP contains two different eucharistic rites -- I and II. Rite II is considered more modern and in general, a church using mostly or entirely Rite II will be more liberal in its leanings (that is a generalization, so take it for what it's worth.) Also in general, a church still using the 1928 BCP is going to be more conservative all around.

HTH. If you have any specific questions, don't hesitate to ask.

 

[Deb in IA]

More info:

The Episcopal Church uses the Book of Common Prayer, or BCP. It contains most of the worship services or liturgies of the church.

The Church has many of the same sacraments as the Roman Catholic church, including baptism, eucharist, confirmation, ordination, marriage, and reconciliation.

The Wiki entry on the Episcopal church is actually pretty good . . . http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Episcopal_Church_in_the_United_States_of_America

 

[Jpgirl]

OMG you're our twins. I was raised Episcopalian-dh Catholic who fell away from the church because he was sexually abused by a priest. So when the kiddos were born we chose the Episcopalian Church. We've been members for 22 years and really liked it. I will have to say that we're not attending as regularly because of the rift going on over the gay bishop thing. Dh and I are way more liberal than our diocese down here in Texas and got tired of some of the gay bashing going on by members (not anyone in our clergy per se) of our church. Kind of left a bad taste in our mouths. So you may want to decide where you stand on that issue and where the church you're interested in stands on it. Good luck

 

[MinnieFan]

I converted from the Roman church over 20 years ago. I had many disagreements with the Roman church (mostly over man-made rules - not theology), and my feeling is if you don't agree with a church you should go find one that suits your needs. For me the Episcopal church has done this. DH and I were married in the Episcopal church, both of our children were baptized in the Episcopal church, and DS has been confirmed. DH never formally converted (we call it being "received," it is similar to confirmation), but he attends with us.

Things I like about the Episcopal church - it is very welcoming (as someone else said, a "big tent"), it does not have negative attitudes toward women (so I feel comfortable raising my daughter in this church), clergy are permitted to marry (which in my opinion helps them have greater understanding of the issues facing families in their parishes), and the laity have a say in what goes on in the church. Although the Anglican communion is worldwide, the American church is - well - very American. Parishes elect their vestries, which in turn elect representatives to diocesan conventions, which then elect representatives to the national convention. It is a church in which the voices of the people in the pews are listened to, and I like that a lot.

 

[RadioFanatic]

Thank you to all for such well thought out and written replies. they are really helpful and I would love to hear more. I am excited to start in a religious community again, I grew up in a wonderful one; and it's good to know that we are thinking of one that feels comfortable to so many.

I had just recently heard about the communion even for very young children and I must admit it surprised me. I also heard that the only sacraments which are done are baptism and confirmation - i.e. no first communion, reconciliation, etc. Does anyone know how one converts if they have been baptised but are not Episcopalian? Are there classes or ceremonies?

Also, JPGirl, pls know I am so sorry for what happened to your dh. Dh and I were actually married catholic in 1998, it wasn't until about 2000-2001 when he started remembering what happened to him.

 

[Deb in IA]

Does anyone know how one converts if they have been baptised but are not Episcopalian? Are there classes or ceremonies?

I had previously been baptised in the Southern Baptist church. I think I had to get a copy of my Baptismal record. Then I took a Newcomers Class that was led by our priest. I was "received" by our Bishop during a Eucharist, I did not have to be baptised again.

 

[MinnieFan]

Does anyone know how one converts if they have been baptised but are not Episcopalian? Are there classes or ceremonies?

As DebinIA said, you do not have to be baptised again. The Episcopal Church recognizes the sacrament of holy baptism as performed by other denominations. You would take some classes (most churches usually have group classes if several people want to be received at the same time), and then the bishop would "receive" you during a confirmation ceremony.

The Episcopal Church has the same sacraments as the Roman Church, not just Holy Eucharist and Holy Baptism. Reconciliation is part of the weekly church service, but private confession is available upon request - it is just not a mandatory thing. As our priest always says with regard to private confession: "All may receive it, none must receive it, some should receive it."

 

[delilah]

I have another, related question. I am Roman Catholic, happy and satisfied with my faith. In the town in which I practice medicine, there is a church that calls itself Anglican Catholic, not Episcopalian. How does that fit into the picture, that is, how is that different in faith and practice from the churches labeled Episcopalian. We have also Episcopalian churches in the community. Thanks.

 

[delilah]

I had previously been baptised in the Southern Baptist church. I think I had to get a copy of my Baptismal record. Then I took a Newcomers Class that was led by our priest. I was "received" by our Bishop during a Eucharist, I did not have to be baptised again.

Likewise, at our RCIA ceremony at the Easter vigil Mass, people previously baptised are not baptised again. For those who might be unfamiliar, that is the ceremony in the Catholic church in which adults are received into the church. Those already baptized are confirmed and receive their first Eucharist. We don't have the bishop come to our church, as our priest is authorized to confirm. Not all are. Every year, there are many people who take part in this ceremony, usually 10-20 in our parish. In particular, I know Lutherans would not be rebaptized, nor would Episcopalians. I would imagine that a person baptised as an infant in the Catholic church would not be rebaptized in the Episcopalian church or Lutheran church. I am not so sure about Baptists, however, because they would rebaptize an adult Catholic joining their church. Usually, things like recognition of baptism is reciprocal--if your church doesn't recognize mine, mine probably doesn't recognize yours.

 

[goofygirl]

The Episcopal Church welcomes you!

I am a convert who came to the Episcopal Church in early 2006. I was baptized in April 06 and confirmed this past May. I love my parish and rector very much and I am very active: I'm on the altar guild, vestry, community care committee and I'm also a lay reader and chalice bearer.

I love that they don't expect you to "leave your brain at the door" when it comes to scripture, etc and I love the liturgy. I'm also very impressed with the Presiding Bishop (see signature) Unfortuantely, the bishop of my diocese of PA is in a lot of trouble right now but that is a whole other topic!

I like that it is for the most part a liberal/progressive church that ordains women. This is very important to me.

Anyway, I think a lot of good info was posted. God bless!


Anglo-Catholic churches are Episcopal Churches but they are different from most Episcopal churces because they retain Catholic traditions/traits but do not follow the Pope or Rome, hence why they are not ROMAN Catholic.

You usually don't find Mary statues or crucifixes in Episcopal churches but in the Anglo-Catholic ones you will.

 

[goofygirl]

wanted to share 2 good sites

www.episcopalchurch.org is the official national church site

http://www.beliefnet.com/ Beliefnet has info on Anglicanism/Episcopalianism and even has a forum where you can post questions.

 

[christineann]

W*mb to tomb Episcopalian here. I have visited other denominations but have found that the Episcopalian church is the best fit for me. I agree with the earlier post that they don't expect you to leave your brain at the door. I go to a traditional Episcopalian church, and we are urged to really think about the scripture, to ask questions, and to think for ourselves and challenge ourselves. We have some very interesting debates in our adult education gatherings. The clergy and church were very, very supportive of my children and me when I went through a divorce.

All are welcome in our church, and our ministers are from varied backgrounds. Our congregation (including visitors) represent many socio economic backgrounds and ages - lots of young families, singles, middles (like me) and older folks.

Good luck to you. Keep looking until you find the best fit for you and your family.

 

[goofygirl]

W*mb to tomb Episcopalian here. I have visited other denominations but have found that the Episcopalian church is the best fit for me. I agree with the earlier post that they don't expect you to leave your brain at the door. I go to a traditional Episcopalian church, and we are urged to really think about the scripture, to ask questions, and to think for ourselves and challenge ourselves. We have some very interesting debates in our adult education gatherings. The clergy and church were very, very supportive of my children and me when I went through a divorce.

All are welcome in our church, and our ministers are from varied backgrounds. Our congregation (including visitors) represent many socio economic backgrounds and ages - lots of young families, singles, middles (like me) and older folks.

Good luck to you. Keep looking until you find the best fit for you and your family.

Why did you "bleep" womb? Womb isn't a "dirty" word.

I also love the "varied backgrounds". Also, so many Episcopalians are converts. Even my priest converted from another faith.

 

[MerryPoppins]

Another cradle Episcopalian checking in. My DH grew up Baptist and then fell away from the church. In college he visited with me and decided the Episcopal Church appealed to him. Our kids grew up in the church, DS 20 is confirmed and DD 16 has completed classes and will soon be confirmed as well. DS is majoring in Psychology and Religious Studies and is considering seminary after college, but he's still not sure.

I've been very active in the church. I've been Sunday School Superintendant, a Sunday School teacher, on the education committee, on the vestry, a youth group leader, member of ECW (womens group), and was diocesan rector for Happening for a number of years. My DH and my kids have also been very involved. I won't go into all the things that they've done.

I love the liturgy of the church and the variety of services. I like the traditional music and the more contemporary songs that we sometimes use. I love my Sunday School class. It makes me think and encourages me to share what I am thinking. I also enjoy our weekly Bible studies. I like that the church allows me to think for myself and not just swallow what I'm told to believe. We discuss scripture and talk about what it means to us and really think about what we believe God would have us do. I like that women are involved and encouraged to be involved. I like the sense of history. Many of our founding fathers and US Presidents were Episcopalians and our government is set up in a similar way to the governing bodies of our church. I like that our priests and bishops can have families and can be women. I like that in my congregation, everyone is welcome...we have such a variety of people that attend. I like that we don't always agree about everything, but we try to love each other anyway and hear each other out. And I like that people there are very welcoming and friendly. We also know how to have fun. Episcopalians can throw a wonderful party!

What don't I like? Our youth groups in Oklahoma tend to be small groups compared to the larger Baptist churches. (Of course that depends on the part of the country where you live.) Sometimes I hear "we've never done it that way", but I guess that's common in all churches probably. Humans can be resistant to change.

The Episcopal Church is going through some interesting times right now. The church in the USA is changing and growing in the way the laity/clergy at national conventions feel called to take us. Some of the church doesn't like all the decisions being made and much of the Anglican Church in the world doesn't like some of the decisions we've made here at home. Some congregations are more forward-thinking, some are deeply entrenched in the old ways and many are middle-of-the-road. As I said before, we're all trying to love each other and listen to each other's views, but sometimes it's hard. You may have to look around to find a congregation that is a good fit. I guess what I'm trying to say is, don't be turned off if the first congregation isn't what you were looking for.

Feel free to ask me questions. I'd love to try to answer and I hope you find a church home that you love.

 

[goofygirl]

Just wanting to add a friendly "warning" about Episcopalians: once you join and attend regularly, you'll be drafted to be on every committee! be prepared to get asked, "Do you think you'll be interested in joining_______?" a lot!

 

[goofygirl]

The comedian Robin Williams, who is an Episcopalian, gave these top ten reasons for being an Episcopalian on a HBO special:






10. No snake handling.


9. You can believe in dinosaurs.


8. Male and female, God created them; male and female, we ordain them.


7. You don't have to check your brains at the door.


6. Pew aerobics.


5. Church year is color coded!


4. Free wine on Sunday.


3. All of the pageantry, none of the guilt.


2. You don't have to know how to swim to get baptized.



And the number one reason for being an Episcopalian:




1. No matter what you believe, there's bound to be at least one other Episcopalian who agrees with you.