Duggars Expecting

[SLK1]

They freely admit that they do -
from their FAQ -


"Child Training Tip-With 6 little boys age 5 and under we’ve enjoyed much more peace, harmony, & order in our home since a friend shared with us about ‘blanket time’. We began this training four years ago, when our second set of twins were 17 months old. They started learning self-control & obedience by sitting quietly on a blanket playing with a few toys. The key words are ‘sit’ & ‘quiet’! At first, we practiced 5 minutes, 2-3 times a day, & worked up to 10-20 minutes at a time. This one tip has changed the atmosphere of our home tremendously. We don’t have little ones tearing up the house as often & getting into things while we are busy. Occasionally, we still have those moments, but over all the little ones are content. This frees us to be able to accomplish more in our day! We have since, transferred this training to other areas, such as sitting during worship services, shopping trips & when visiting with company…etc. It’s teaching them responsibility (knowing & doing what both God & others are expecting of them) at an early age. "

This is a far cry from whipping the baby with a switch!!!! Where does it say that, and if not written here, who would admit that? Sounds very dramatic in my opinion, and probably not true.

 

[TnTWalter]

I refuse to watch it now. So sad to mis-use God's teachings that way. Just makes me so sad for the children not impressed with the parenting skills.

Trish

 

[Tiffany_PartyOf7]

If you read their book, it explains blanket training.... they do use it but there are many many MANY ways to use blanket training - most of which do not involve abuse. (Yes, I consider yelling and hitting a BABY abuse!)

Anyways, what they do is start with short amounts of time and work up to large amounts of time. If the baby moves, they put them back. No hitting involved. They just keep putting them back until they are used to it. From everything I've read and seen, I believe Michelle Duggar to be a great mother. The way she talks to her children when they have done wrong is incredible. There isn't any screaming or yelling. She pulls them aside and gets on their level and calmly explains what they did wrong and what they should do better.

 

[distherapy]

This is a far cry from whipping the baby with a switch!!!! Where does it say that, and if not written here, who would admit that? Sounds very dramatic in my opinion, and probably not true.

Most of the blanket training stuff I have read refers to a "switch", the Duggar book apparently calls it a "quick correction"

On blanket training: (pg 127-128)

Quote
"As the blanket training continued over several days, I would walk around the corner, out of their sight but still able to peek around the and see them. If one of them made a loud noise or got off the blanket, I would come flying in with a stern word and a quick correction. I didn't raise my voice and I didn't sound angry. But ist was obvious that crawling off the blanket or making noise wasn't allowed. Meanwhile, the other twin, the one that hadn't made the noice or crawled off the blanket, was watching what was happening to his brother and thinking, Ohhh, I don't want that to happen to me, so I'm gonna sit here on my blanket and play with my toy and be quiet."

Correction and discipline usually mean spanking, especially with a family that believes in spanking and believes that the Bible tells you that you should do it and how to do it. It's a whitewashed quote, in my opinion, because one could believe that the "correction" is merely words, but then you have to remember that she already said she used "stern words" so the correction is something else.

From the thread I posted previously - "The fact that they espouse Gothard and his programs publicly mean that they do in fact spank and raise their children in a very specifically punitive way. You have to apply and be approved to be in their program and in order to do so, you have to discipline their way, if the Duggar's did not, they would not be able to stay within the program.

I think those who've done it before talk about how certain words that sounds innocuous to us (like "correct") mean very specific things within the community. So when Michelle Duggar says "correct" she means "spank" "

Anyway, that is what I read and I think blanket training is cruel and sad. I am sure some Duggar fans won't believe they do it, and that's fine. I think I'd even prefer it that way - I'd hate to believe people will copy that behavior using the Duggars as role models.

 

[DMRick]

Anyways, what they do is start with short amounts of time and work up to large amounts of time. If the baby moves, they put them back. No hitting involved. They just keep putting them back until they are used to it. From everything I've read and seen, I believe Michelle Duggar to be a great mother. The way she talks to her children when they have done wrong is incredible. There isn't any screaming or yelling. She pulls them aside and gets on their level and calmly explains what they did wrong and what they should do better.

Thanks..that's what I thought I read on their site a long time ago, so I was surprised to read that she used a switch. Some people are more zealous than others, which does not mean MD uses the switch method. I think if MD was using a switch or hitting her children, TLC would quickly find that they had a much bigger story to put on their station. I never see fear in the children's eyes, and there is obviously much love.

 

[longstangetrip]

I thought this thread was about Anna and Josh having a baby? Everything I've read about blanket training doesn't mention hitting or screaming. I wish I'd done it, I had a couple of kids I couldn't put down until they were nearly 3! I love the Duggars; they are not conventional, but it's obvious they have happy, smart, well balanced kids. Bunches of 'em!

 

[MICKEY4EVER!]

I don't see anything wrong with spanking a child as a form of discipline, so long as the parent doing the spanking is in control and not overly angry. I was raised on spankings and I did deserve a lot of them. I use it now only as a last resort with my son. I realize that this could open up a can of worms here and I do not wish to open a debate on whether spankings are right or wrong. We all have an opinion on that.

However, I do not believe that an innocent child sitting on a blanket should be spanked for moving. If they do spank the baby and if a quick correction means "spanking", then I disagree with this. There are other ways to teach your babies the correct way to behave without doing this. Babies usually respond well to a stern "no-no".

 

[princessmom29]

If you read their book, it explains blanket training.... they do use it but there are many many MANY ways to use blanket training - most of which do not involve abuse. (Yes, I consider yelling and hitting a BABY abuse!)

Anyways, what they do is start with short amounts of time and work up to large amounts of time. If the baby moves, they put them back. No hitting involved. They just keep putting them back until they are used to it. From everything I've read and seen, I believe Michelle Duggar to be a great mother. The way she talks to her children when they have done wrong is incredible. There isn't any screaming or yelling. She pulls them aside and gets on their level and calmly explains what they did wrong and what they should do better.

??? What we see is what they want us to see.

Most of the blanket training stuff I have read refers to a "switch", the Duggar book apparently calls it a "quick correction"

On blanket training: (pg 127-128)

Quote
"As the blanket training continued over several days, I would walk around the corner, out of their sight but still able to peek around the and see them. If one of them made a loud noise or got off the blanket, I would come flying in with a stern word and a quick correction. I didn't raise my voice and I didn't sound angry. But ist was obvious that crawling off the blanket or making noise wasn't allowed. Meanwhile, the other twin, the one that hadn't made the noice or crawled off the blanket, was watching what was happening to his brother and thinking, Ohhh, I don't want that to happen to me, so I'm gonna sit here on my blanket and play with my toy and be quiet."

Correction and discipline usually mean spanking, especially with a family that believes in spanking and believes that the Bible tells you that you should do it and how to do it. It's a whitewashed quote, in my opinion, because one could believe that the "correction" is merely words, but then you have to remember that she already said she used "stern words" so the correction is something else.

From the thread I posted previously - "The fact that they espouse Gothard and his programs publicly mean that they do in fact spank and raise their children in a very specifically punitive way. You have to apply and be approved to be in their program and in order to do so, you have to discipline their way, if the Duggar's did not, they would not be able to stay within the program.

I think those who've done it before talk about how certain words that sounds innocuous to us (like "correct") mean very specific things within the community. So when Michelle Duggar says "correct" she means "spank" "

Anyway, that is what I read and I think blanket training is cruel and sad. I am sure some Duggar fans won't believe they do it, and that's fine. I think I'd even prefer it that way - I'd hate to believe people will copy that behavior using the Duggars as role models.

Exactly! They would be completely stupid to admit to the general public that they switch those children. That would be the end of the moneymaker that is their show, their book ect., but i do not doubt for a minute that they do it. In order to be such a public part of this homeschool program the would have to. It is just like any other cult. There are code words and signals used to get the message across. It is sad that they use this method so that they have little robots to do exactly as they are told at all times because they are afrais of what will happen if they don't. In the first couple of specials about them it was obvious that all responses by the children to questions were completley scripted. They are told what to do, what to say, and what to think and there can be no questioning or dissent.

 

[princessmom29]

Thanks..that's what I thought I read on their site a long time ago, so I was surprised to read that she used a switch. Some people are more zealous than others, which does not mean MD uses the switch method. I think if MD was using a switch or hitting her children, TLC would quickly find that they had a much bigger story to put on their station. I never see fear in the children's eyes, and there is obviously much love.

TLC is only interested in making money here. breaking a story like that would mean the end of the gravy train. They have no interest in dong that.

 

[kgle]

Its truly sad how some are so quick to judge and form opinions that are based on nothing.

 

[distherapy]

Its truly sad how some are so quick to judge and form opinions that are based on nothing.

I'm basing my opinion on the fact that they blanket train (and admit it) and the fact that they spank (and admit it "The Duggars consider the Bible something of an owner's manual, a how-to for life. They sometimes employ "time outs" to discipline their children, but they also think the Bible teaches parents to spank and even instructs on how to do it. " excerpted from article linked below).

In my mind, 2+2 = 4 (or in their case, 1+1 = 18), and that's all I need to know to not use them as a model for parenting. I don't understand why they are on my TV and happily use my freedom of choice to not watch them. It just makes my sad that other parents may feel they are doing something wrong because their kids aren't "behaving as well" as the ones on TV. Just a reminder that there is often more than what we see.


http://www.quiverfull.com/articles.php/id20/

 

[princessmom29]

Its truly sad how some are so quick to judge and form opinions that are based on nothing.

My opinions are based on what comes out of their mouth both on TV and in theri books ect. I DON'T agree with the things that they ADMIT that they do to discipline their kids. peroid. It think it is doing children a disservice to have 18 of them in one family. I feel that there is no way to adequately parent and care for 18 in one family. That's where the blanket training and everything else they do to maintain control of those kids come in. When you have 18 in one house the easiest way to maintain discipline is with an iron hand. My opinion is not based on nothing. It is based on what they say and do. What else can i base my opinon on? What I find sad is the fact that those kids have been treated that way and that people don't think that there is anything wrong with it. I am speaking up to say that it is WRONG to raise children to be obedient though fear of physical retribution. I spank my daughter when something she is doing is a threat to her safety, but blanket training an infant is a completly different matter. Threating a helpless baby that way is justcruel!

 

[rjthkids]

I'm someone who posted on a previous thread that mentioned the Duggars and explained that *yes* they absolutely switch their babies/children as a form of obedience. They are Gothardites and use Bill Gothard's ATI program to homeschool their children. If you watch some of their specials they have at least one that shows them going to the ATI conference to be around "likeminded" people.

If you have any familiarity with Bill Gothard and ATI, you would absolutely recognize all the code words for switching/spanking. A "swift correction" is a Gothard code-word for "switching". Read all of Gothard's theological works, which you are required to believe and follow in order to homeschool with ATI, and you will understand that they are highly punitive and they are also highly secretive about it. Gothardites are extremely sensitive to the fact that our government has "overstepped" its authority and can consider spanking child abuse. Therefore they stress privacy of "correction" and not making their exact discipline methods known to non-ATIers/Gothardites.

If you have grown up in any kind of very right-line Christian circles, understanding Gothard and his key words, as well Michael Pearl you'd understand all the nuances. I am certainly not judging them off "nothing"--- they make it known they follow Gothard and after years of hearing Gothard teaching, I know what it means to grow up in a Gothard home. (An interesting side note--- Gothard is ADAMANTLY against adoption. They believe it is bringing generational curses from others' sins into your family. Which is why you are instructed to have your own biological children and to be quiverful, but never via adoption. As a mother of both biological and adopted children, the fact I chose to adopt at all means I've basically sinned against God by taking on the generational curses of "bad" families and I would not be welcomed into ATI.)

Does that mean the Duggars don't love their children or are horrible, evil people. But they have such well behaved children in large part because they are willing to use methods of discipline that I would never, ever, EVER in a million years find acceptable. And while I am a fellow bible-believing Christian, they follow the theological interpretation of a man I vehemently disagree with. (Gothard would also say my biological children's special needs are caused by my own family generational sins that I have not yet adequately repented of). To me, such a wonderfully behaved family is a completely moot point when you have to use the techniques they use in order to achieve it.

 

[DISNEYFOS]

I'm someone who posted on a previous thread that mentioned the Duggars and explained that *yes* they absolutely switch their babies/children as a form of obedience. They are Gothardites and use Bill Gothard's ATI program to homeschool their children. If you watch some of their specials they have at least one that shows them going to the ATI conference to be around "likeminded" people.

If you have any familiarity with Bill Gothard and ATI, you would absolutely recognize all the code words for switching/spanking. A "swift correction" is a Gothard code-word for "switching". Read all of Gothard's theological works, which you are required to believe and follow in order to homeschool with ATI, and you will understand that they are highly punitive and they are also highly secretive about it. Gothardites are extremely sensitive to the fact that our government has "overstepped" its authority and can consider spanking child abuse. Therefore they stress privacy of "correction" and not making their exact discipline methods known to non-ATIers/Gothardites.

If you have grown up in any kind of very right-line Christian circles, understanding Gothard and his key words, as well Michael Pearl you'd understand all the nuances. I am certainly not judging them off "nothing"--- they make it known they follow Gothard and after years of hearing Gothard teaching, I know what it means to grow up in a Gothard home. (An interesting side note--- Gothard is ADAMANTLY against adoption. They believe it is bringing generational curses from others' sins into your family. Which is why you are instructed to have your own biological children and to be quiverful, but never via adoption. As a mother of both biological and adopted children, the fact I chose to adopt at all means I've basically sinned against God by taking on the generational curses of "bad" families and I would not be welcomed into ATI.)

Does that mean the Duggars don't love their children or are horrible, evil people. But they have such well behaved children in large part because they are willing to use methods of discipline that I would never, ever, EVER in a million years find acceptable. And while I am a fellow bible-believing Christian, they follow the theological interpretation of a man I vehemently disagree with. (Gothard would also say my biological children's special needs are caused by my own family generational sins that I have not yet adequately repented of). To me, such a wonderfully behaved family is a completely moot point when you have to use the techniques they use in order to achieve it.

Wow I've never had any interest in the show to actually watch but this is awful. And to celebrate such a thing with a reality tv show is pathetic.

Unfortunately it will probably take a death of a child from someone taking the Gothard way of discpline too far in order for people to realize. I was spanked as a child but for doing something wrong...not for crawling off a blanket as a baby..sorry but that is child abuse.

 

[DianeV]

Back to the subject at hand..those are children having children to me..they havent even experienced real life so they to me are like children still..I imagine they will have just as many babies as his mom..very sad

 

[sweetpeakaris]

I can't believe why Anna would want to rush into having Babies. I guess I couldn't imagine having a baby a year after marriage and they just started having sex, way too soon. I think they will have more than the in laws. I'm curious to know, if after laboring her first, she would continue to practice no birth control. I know they want to leave thier fertility up to God, but thats easier said than done. I don't think she knows or realizes what she is in for.

 

[Tiffany_PartyOf7]

Most of the blanket training stuff I have read refers to a "switch", the Duggar book apparently calls it a "quick correction"

On blanket training: (pg 127-128)

Quote
"As the blanket training continued over several days, I would walk around the corner, out of their sight but still able to peek around the and see them. If one of them made a loud noise or got off the blanket, I would come flying in with a stern word and a quick correction. I didn't raise my voice and I didn't sound angry. But ist was obvious that crawling off the blanket or making noise wasn't allowed. Meanwhile, the other twin, the one that hadn't made the noice or crawled off the blanket, was watching what was happening to his brother and thinking, Ohhh, I don't want that to happen to me, so I'm gonna sit here on my blanket and play with my toy and be quiet."

Correction and discipline usually mean spanking, especially with a family that believes in spanking and believes that the Bible tells you that you should do it and how to do it. It's a whitewashed quote, in my opinion, because one could believe that the "correction" is merely words, but then you have to remember that she already said she used "stern words" so the correction is something else.

From the thread I posted previously - "The fact that they espouse Gothard and his programs publicly mean that they do in fact spank and raise their children in a very specifically punitive way. You have to apply and be approved to be in their program and in order to do so, you have to discipline their way, if the Duggar's did not, they would not be able to stay within the program.

I think those who've done it before talk about how certain words that sounds innocuous to us (like "correct") mean very specific things within the community. So when Michelle Duggar says "correct" she means "spank" "

Anyway, that is what I read and I think blanket training is cruel and sad. I am sure some Duggar fans won't believe they do it, and that's fine. I think I'd even prefer it that way - I'd hate to believe people will copy that behavior using the Duggars as role models.

I'm sure she is talking about it as a toddler on the blanket. What kind of BABY would be able to not do something because someone else got in trouble? I'm pretty sure she realizes that babies won't not do something because someone else was disciplined. LOL. I don't think she spanks babies. I'm thinking it starts more around 18 months and up. She uses blanket training until they are doing schoolwork so it isn't so crazy to think that she was talking about spanking being for her toddlers on the blanket and not her infants.

 

[DISNEYFOS]

I'm sure she is talking about it as a toddler on the blanket. What kind of BABY would be able to not do something because someone else got in trouble? I'm pretty sure she realizes that babies won't not do something because someone else was disciplined. LOL. I don't think she spanks babies. I'm thinking it starts more around 18 months and up. She uses blanket training until they are doing schoolwork so it isn't so crazy to think that she was talking about spanking being for her toddlers on the blanket and not her infants.

Most Toddlers at 18 months are walking not crawling...She's quoted above supposedly from her book of babies "crawling" off a blanket and being disciplined for it. That is just bizarre. And people watch this as entertainment??

 

[Tiffany_PartyOf7]

Most Toddlers at 18 months are walking not crawling...She's quoted above supposedly from her book of babies "crawling" off a blanket and being disciplined for it. That is just bizarre. And people watch this as entertainment??

Um, my toddlers crawl away from me when they think they are getting away with something. Heck, my 6 yr old will crawl away if he thinks he can get away with something LOL.

And the quote above had a few typos, so I'll check my book after the kids go to bed for accuracy. But yes, I have toddler and school-aged children who will crawl when they are being sneaky.

 

[Tiffany_PartyOf7]

Okay, my kids are cleaning so I had time to look it up. The book specifically states "toddlers" and it says she started with the twin boys at 17 months. She trained Joy-Anna at 31 months! So hardly babies. LOL