Does it bother you when foreigners don't speak English in front of you? (SORRY, DOUBL

[shmoogrrrl]

I have visited a few Nail places where the workers sit around and chat in their language of choice while they are doing their jobs. Not only does it slow them down and therefor slow ME down, but it is pretty obvious when they are talking about people IN the shop.

That is just rude to me.

 

[Kallison]

If the point is to exclude you from the conversation then yes I find it rude. I was in the dollar store once and the clerk and a customer where conversing in Italian. When she waited on me she aplogized for not speaking in English, she said it was just nice to talk in her native language. When I worked at a University everyone would speak English and then switch to German when they would walk in and then French, etc. I always felt stupid, most were bilingual in several languages. Only us Americans are the dummies that can only speak English.

 

[FINFAN]

If they KNOW I don't understand the language...yes...but to be fair, how would anyone know if Polish, German, French, etc. were my native language? I am not offended if it is on a street corner etc., but I agree with English being the primary language that is used first, and then asking thru English if another language is ok to be used.

 

[njcarita]

This isn't the case with all of them. What about the others?

i agree that the best thing would be to learn english- but i have never tried to learn a language as an adult - it is not the easiest thing in the world to do!!!

i know people who have been here since the 1930"s who do not speak english- they are happy living in there ny neighborhood- surrounded my what they know-

i also know people who have only been here a few years - and have totally subermerged themselves in us culture-

getting back to original question- NO - it doesn't bother me if someone is speaking italian, spanish, german etc in front of me---
if i don't know them- i could care less whether they are talking about me or not.

i'm pretty easy going
--- i don't ask people to take their shoes off at my door--- i don't care if my kids friends use my first name --- etc

 

[scrump]

After we got into the cab, the driver, the other woman, nd I had about 5 minutes of chit-chat, then the woman and taxi driver spent almost half an hour speaking to each other in another language. The only time English was spoken again was when I was being dropped off (I got off before the other woman) and the driver asked me if I had a bag in the trunk because he couldn't remember.

Then, today, I went to get my nails done and stopped at a new place. The nail tech proceeded to talk, laugh, have a good ole time with another lady working there the entire time, and never spoke English to me unless she had a question for me. I know she understands and speaks English because she spoke enough for me to realize that when I first came in to ask about prices, and if she had time for fit me in, etc...

There are times where I enjoy listening to other people communicate,, but I think it is disrespectful for two people to hold a conversation in another language in front of someone who doesn't understand what they are saying. Talk about feeling left out, too.

In the cab instance, I think it might bother me because you all entered the same situation together. You, a woman sharing your ride, and the driver. Your presence should be recognized if you so choose. (Depends on the person, I personally would want to be left alone). I've been in the lady's position, and I would feel very awkward carrying on a conversation with only one of the two people I just met. I think given a choice, the better thing to do would've been to include you in the conversation, as best as possible. At least, that's what I would've done.

In the nail salon situation, I don't think it would bother me as much since you entered a situation where the two workers were in a conversation already in progress. I'd just enjoy the manicure in that situation.

My parents don't speak a lot of english, so I am familiar with these issues. In mixed company (English and non-English speakers, the gesture of a balance between the two is usually appreciated). But every situation is different, and I'm sure people will bring up examples that I wouldn't be bothered by.

 

[Boston Tea Party]

I feel that it is rude in a group situation to exclude anyone. That can be accomplished by talking in a language that is not know by a group member.

We had a meeting the other day and the bilingual teachers starting speaking Spanish. They know that we don't speak it and they do speak enough English to be paid for teaching it half of the day. I feel that was rude in the same way that it would be rude if I started speaking to my partner in a language that was all our own. Doesn't matter if it's Pig Latin. Rude is rude.

 

[jonestavern]

my mother, a multi-lingual American, always believed to speak another language in front of English speakers, as in the taxi cab situation or the beauty parlour instance, was rude. When friends persisted in speaking Spanish in front of, an obviously, English-only speaker, she would run a translation for the benefit of the English-only speaker. I do think if someone is in line or in another public area, to speak in whatever tongue one is comfortable with, is certainly okay w/me.
I have experienced being chatted about & have savored replying in kind!
I am polite, point made, I hope.
As for overseas, it always goes a long way to make attempts at speaking the language. You will run into the rude ones--(guess which country )--
Most folks respect yr efforts.

Jean, of Tavern fame

 

[Kim&Chris]

Yes and no.

Some people in my family are Italian immigrants. Some of them have made an effort to learn English and try their best to speak it when in the presence of non-Italians. Sometimes they just can't figure out a word, and substitute an Italian word in its place. No big deal.

However, sometimes it's just rude. One time I was in a nail salon run by Russians. Two of them were talking & glancing at me occasionally. I heard one of them call me a "shiksa" (or however it is spelled) and both of them started to laugh. That was it. I stood up and left. They clearly used their language to insult me in a way that they believed I wouldn't understand.

 

[trappednabox]

My parents and grandparents speak Spanish when they don't want my sister, cousins, or I to know what they're saying. :

They did this to us too! I don't hate it when it happens, But I hate when someone automatically speaks to me in spanish, just b/c I'm hispanic. I can understand someone who doesn't speak english, but not by just some random person who doesn't think I speak english.

 

[grlpwrd]

Yes, it's rude to me, too.

I equate it with how my dh will speak engineer-ese with his colleagues in front of me and I am left out of the conversation.

 

[Boston Tea Party]

HEY! My grandparents used to speak Spanish in front of me, too! It's funny how you block out the things that make you mad.

 

[browneyes]

Deja vu thread?

 

[Boston Tea Party]

You can say that again.

 

[LoraJ]

Where I live, it seems as though English is the second language. I get peopel calling me that call the wrong number and can't understand when i tell them so. And they get upset with me that I am not speaking spanish.

I don't expect people to come here and learn English right away, but it does kind of bug me that so many adults don't make any effort to learn. My ex-boyfriend was from Costa Rica, they were here for over 10 years at the time. His dad had pretty much assimilated since he worked outside of the home. His mother knew about 10 words. She would only watch the spanish stations and hang around with people who spoke spanish.
I just always felt like she was missing out on so much. All her kids spoke perfect English. She couldn't communicate at all with me or her daughter in-law. and she had no desire to learn. There are so many people in this area like that. If that makes them happy, then fine.

if I ever moved somewhere where English isn't spoken, I would make every effort possible to learn the language.

But in re: to the OP, I think it is rude for them to carry on a conversation like that in front of you. You are in a cab with them, you can't walk away and strike up a conversation with someone else.

It doesn't bother me that much when people are speaking a different language around me, but when it is done to exclude, it is rude.

 

[browneyes]

You can say that again.

Deja vu thread?

 

[Boston Tea Party]

Deja vu thread?

 

[olena]

It doesn't bother me at all.

 

[MUFFYCAT]

The only time it bothers me is when they won't speak English at all. I still don't understand how someone can live in the country for more than five years and yet still know very little English.
Maybe it's because my father came here in the 50's from Poland he learned English, yet still spoke Polish.

 

[Planogirl]

It bothers me in a group situation but otherwise I don't mind it. I think it's rude to exclude someone from a conversation though.

 

[totalia]

Nope. They are from a different country. It's like saying you can't speak english when you go somewhere else. Sorry, doesn't work that way.