Do you pay for your children to attend Birthday Parties?

[m&m's mom]

I would certainly not embarrass anyone, especially family, over $10.00. You never know the circumstances. If my chid wanted to go, I would pay.
I totally agree that is against everything Emily Post (my hero ) would ever suggest but sometimes you have to look at the people feelings and choose your battles.

 

[B714210]

I can match your story. This past May we got an invite to a graduation party for a graduate I had never heard of, much less met. I ask my husband of 26 years, "Do you know this person?" He thinks it over and decides it's the daughter of a cousin of his who lives in a town nearby. We haven't seen the cousin for AT LEAST 15 years, never even knew he had a daughter. The invite was for a graduation party at a local park, and stated "Please bring a dish to pass, a white elephant gift for BINGO, your own lawn chairs and ____(graduate) is registered at Target. Needless to say, we did not RSVP, much less attend. Tacky, tacky, tacky.

 

[C.Ann]

I would certainly not embarrass anyone, especially family, over $10.00. You never know the circumstances. If my chid wanted to go, I would pay.
I totally agree that is against everything Emily Post (my hero ) would ever suggest but sometimes you have to look at the people feelings and choose your battles.

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I would be far more embarrassed if I were the one requesting that each guest "pay" $10!

Sorry, but if they can't afford the type of party they are hosting - family or not - they should have something smaller at home.. It's very, very rude..

 

[eatatmidnight]

Thanks for your input. She will go and have a good time. There are some circumstances. It normally isn't a problem because we live a few hours away.

 

[ceecee]

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I would be far more embarrassed if I were the one requesting that each guest "pay" $10!

Sorry, but if they can't afford the type of party they are hosting - family or not - they should have something smaller at home.. It's very, very rude..

I agree! While it sounds fun and my DD would love to go, it's so tacky. If they can't afford it, they need to do a home party.

 

[DISNEYRIFFIC]

This is all insane........ We are having a party this Sept at a local park that has fishing, volleyball, hiking, our site has a grill and pavilion. It's 2.50 to park, and we didn't even want our family guest to have to pay that. So we coordinated with the park to pre-pay for our guests.

I think you are correct to say NO to the party - and am equally as outraged about the mini-golfing lady !!

People........ come on........

 

[pigletto]

I could maybe see if it was an event they were going to and everyone had to bring their own money for a souveneir if they wanted one, or something along those lines. But to pay for attending the party???? My dd has been totally happy with snacks and movies and a sleepover for her birthday. There are simply many other things you can do for a party if it's too expensive to take everyone out.

 

[disneybridetobe]

Oh you HAVE to be kidding. I feel it's more than tacky, it's wrong, it's like excluding poor kids! (LOL, I'm on the Budget Board for a reason )

We had a small b-day party for DD last month, and we did what we could within our budget. We had a cake and food, and it was a nice time for everyone... no fancy extras, either!

I can't believe the mini-golf mom, either! What gives?
I guess if this is what birthday parties are becoming... well I'd rather give my daughter *more* gifts rather than spending the money for a party.

Hmmph!

 

[Lisa06468]

My DD went to a mini-golf birthday party and I put $5 in her pocket for "treats" after they finished golfing (they have video games, candy, etc) when she came home she told me she didn't get to do any of that because the mom used her $5 to pay for her mini golf game! She said a couple of girls didn't bring money and they didn't get to play - just walked with them to each hole!!

Are you kidding me!??! That is craziness.

And no, wouldnt send my kid to a party if I had to pay for it.

 

[bettyann29]

no we've never had to pay to go to a birthday party.. I thought that was part of the reasoning for a birthday gift as thats like going to a wedding.. you bring a gift and generally dont pay..

 

[stitchlovestink]

My DD went to a mini-golf birthday party and I put $5 in her pocket for "treats" after they finished golfing (they have video games, candy, etc) when she came home she told me she didn't get to do any of that because the mom used her $5 to pay for her mini golf game! She said a couple of girls didn't bring money and they didn't get to play - just walked with them to each hole!!

that is just down right mean to those poor kids.

 

[GOOFY4DONALD]

If you can't financially afford one of these themed parties, have cake [homemade] and icecream at your house with a big pitcher of homemade koolaid or lemonade. Play games....heck in the summer have them run in a sprinkler. No one has to do these golf, bounce, bowling, build a bear, whatever parties....and skip goodie bags...

I'm so tired of people doing these crazy elaborate parties. And the goodie bags anymore. My goodness.

That mom that didn't even inform people they had to pay for the mini-golf [putt putt] should be smacked. How rude to those girls.

Ugh.

OK....obviously struck a nerve. LOL.

ITA!!! Whatever happened to these parties? I do not understand why a child's party has to cost hundreds of dollars. My kids would love these kinds of parties but I give them an option...do they want a big party or a big gift. They know they are not getting both.

 

[GOOFY4DONALD]

My DD went to a mini-golf birthday party and I put $5 in her pocket for "treats" after they finished golfing (they have video games, candy, etc) when she came home she told me she didn't get to do any of that because the mom used her $5 to pay for her mini golf game! She said a couple of girls didn't bring money and they didn't get to play - just walked with them to each hole!!

Boy I hope you said something to that mom. I couldn't imagine a mom doing that...those poor kids.

 

[moredisneyplease]

Each and every one of these stories is crazy!

1) $10 to ATTEND a party?? What?? Are they expecting a gift in addition to that? I agree w/ others.......have a cheap party if you can't afford a fancy one!

2) the mini golf story is so sad At least with the above story you go in to it knowing you're paying. I'm sure those gals who showed up and didnt get to play are scarred by the whole thing. Shame on that mother

and

3) the graduation party story is just amazingly tacky!!! A long lost relative and a list of requests. Wow!!

If anyone cares, my 7 month old is a size 3 diaper so feel free to ship a box to me just because you're reading my post! Oh, and also ship an appetizer so I can pass the plate around!

 

[chrisann]

The nerve of some people!!! The mother with the mini golf needs to be "politely reminded of etiquette when hosting a birthday party." She she have guest bring their own dinner to her wedding reception? I agree that if you can't afford these big parties without expecting others to pay, DON"T HAVE THEM!!! What are they teaching their kids? As for your family member, I would not go. Good Luck! I thought my family was weird!

 

[mommycrawford]

This is the product of keeping up with the Joneses in the ugliest way!

Children should never be excluded or excluded because of economics!

Childhood is that great part of life where reinforcing " being youself is enough"
should be our goal, and learning to choose friends based on how they treat you, NOT what they have or how they look, etc..

I know it is customary at weddings and sweet 16s to give money as a gift, but many opt to give other things anyway....And this is an adultish situation.

Like a back handed compliment, this "invite" is laced with obligations that really should belong to the host IMHO!

Most of us do the research and find creative ways to entertain guests on a budget, hence the wonderful Budget Board!!!!!

 

[DVC Sadie]

My DD went to a mini-golf birthday party and I put $5 in her pocket for "treats" after they finished golfing (they have video games, candy, etc) when she came home she told me she didn't get to do any of that because the mom used her $5 to pay for her mini golf game! She said a couple of girls didn't bring money and they didn't get to play - just walked with them to each hole!!

Good grief, I feel bad for your dd and the other kids at that party!

Nothing says "Happy Birthday" like having to pay to attend.

 

[DVC Sadie]

I asked my mom about it since she sees them more and that's the way it is. It is at a Laser tag place.

Well, thats just crazy!

What ever happened to hosting a birthday party instead of asking guests to basically throw the birthday party?

 

[carmie3377]

I agree with everyone, that is insane. Heck, birthday parties in general have become insane. Everyone has to rent those blow up bouncie thingies that cost how much money. Or they are having parties at Build a Bear, Ice Skating, ect. Then, the give out these elaborate goodie bags. Parents are spending hundreds of dollars and I just don't understand.

I have never rented anything for our parties, only hand out small goodie bags with some candy in them and have been making their cakes the last couple of years. I refuse to spend a lot of money. The kids still have a good time and that is what counts. I'm even considering stopping parties all together and just take them somewhere, but I would feel guilty to my 2 YO DS since DD has had 9 parties.

 

[chloelovesdisney]

Well, although I've never heard of anyone paying to attend a child's birthday party, I would pay the $10 if my child wanted to go. If it was $100 no, but it's not worth it for me to get upset over $10.