Do you ever feel like....

[CheshireVal]

This was the OP's response on post #75. I don't understand. If the OP isn't upset, why are others getting upset for her?

Because it's generally annoying, no matter what thread the private jokes migrate to. Sorry to sound harsh, but there it is.

Besides, the OP isn't on here joking and laughing along with everyone. I think if she really wanted to be a part of this jolly group, she'd be posting.

 

[imsorry]

Maybe she isn't up yet? Naybe she has other things to do this morning?

 

[Tigger&Belle]

I know you do T&B. In fact, I think you are one of the nicest people on the DIS, and when I say nice I think you are a genuinely caring person. I think people are offended by the personal conversation that goes on in threads, not you personally. If they are offended by you, I think they need to look a little closer. I've never seen you be anything but supportive of your fellow DISers. Maybe people are just confused by the joking relationship you have with several other members of the board? I know I used to be, I guess I didn't understand if it was like an inside joke that might have some underlying meaning, but I've since realized that its y'all way of keeping in touch. I think probably the best way to avoid that confusion is to keep the private conversation contained to one thread, or in PMs or if you are joking with one another, let everyone else in on the joke. I saw one the other day (not sure who exactly the players were), but people kept talking about something the rest of us were not privvy to. They were using a certain acronym and just having fun with each other, but the rest of the people on the thread were lost. I think that is where the breakdown occurs. Its not mean intentions on anyone's part, I really believe that, but it does lead to hard feelings. KWIM?

T&B, I sure hope the results of your tests come back o.k.

I know exactly what you're saying and I understand that. As a matter of fact, when I first came to the CB a couple years ago I felt EXACTLY like this. I was not in on all the inside jokes and comments. Sometimes I would ask about them and other times I would just let it go.

I would go onto threads, say something (a direct answer to the OPs question, thought, or issue), nobody would respond, and several posts later someone who was obviously more "known" would say almost the same exact thing and they would be quoted and kudos giving. I did feel a little hurt by that at first until I started posting more and I realized a couple things. One is that some threads move fast and/or people who are known are noticed more sometimes and I wasn't going to take great offense. The other is that the more I posted, the more I felt I belonged, and the less it happened. And yes, it still happens and I joke that I've quoted myself before when I've been ignored. The most important thing that I remember from those days, however, is that I will do my best not to have someone else feel the way I felt on a thread that I've asked for advice on. I know that I miss people who have posted to me, but I try to be conscious of the feelings of others.

As to the inside jokes on general threads, everyone doesn't hang out in one spot and in one thread yesterday (I forgot if it was this one and maybe it was more than one), I saw a lot of playful bantering between various people and it seemed to me that the group doing this didn't even know each other from other threads. It was just some silliness that was going on and to an outsider it might have seemed like a clique takeover when it was anything but that.

In general, the true hijackings have gotten MUCH better. And it is rather ironic that some of the clique-haters (and I hate the word clique to begin with to describe these threads since it has such an exclusive meaning when the ones I belong to are anything but exclusive) have their own merry band of exclusive clique members who spend their time knocking down and criticizing others. Those are the people I wonder about--the ones who do have mean intent.

Oh, OT, the dr called (which wasn't supposed to happen until Wed). Without getting into details here something is going on and we don't know what (I'm now referred to a GI for a possible stone blockage), but the good news is that it doesn't appear to be what I was fearing. So good news, albeit inconclusive.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Hey everyone! I haven't been on this thread in a bit as we have been battling sickness in our house including multiple trips to the ER. I tried to read through as much as I could. I know that nobody is intentionally hurtful but I will admit that it is in my opinion, rude to start posting the inside jokes on a thread. Even on this thread there was that nonsense on page 1. It is exactly what I was talking about. I have nothing against being close friends with someone etc., but doing that during a completely other conversation is like being at a dinner party and everyone but you and your date are in on the joke. Kind of makes you want to leave immediately. JMHO. Anyway- thank you for all your support. It's nice to know I am not the oly one. I hope everyone is doing well today!

 

[JunieJay]

I
Oh, OT, the dr called (which wasn't supposed to happen until Wed). Without getting into details here something is going on and we don't know what (I'm now referred to a GI for a possible stone blockage), but the good news is that it doesn't appear to be what I was fearing. So good news, albeit inconclusive.

Thank God its not what you feared.

In the end, all of this DIS stuff should just be entertainment. Sometimes it takes something like your health being compromised to put it in perspective. Best of luck with the GI honey, I'm going through a waiting game of sorts myself with inconclusive tests and not feeling 100 perecent so you have my sympathy. I hope we both get our issues resolved and are as good as new soon.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Tigger&Belle and JunieJay I hope everything works out with your testing. It is so stressful waiting for results.

 

[MUFFYCAT]

Hi mama

Sorry to hear you had a rough few days.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Thanks!

 

[Tigger&Belle]

Hey everyone! I haven't been on this thread in a bit as we have been battling sickness in our house including multiple trips to the ER. I tried to read through as much as I could. I know that nobody is intentionally hurtful but I will admit that it is in my opinion, rude to start posting the inside jokes on a thread. Even on this thread there was that nonsense on page 1. It is exactly what I was talking about. I have nothing against being close friends with someone etc., but doing that during a completely other conversation is like being at a dinner party and everyone but you and your date are in on the joke. Kind of makes you want to leave immediately. JMHO. Anyway- thank you for all your support. It's nice to know I am not the oly one. I hope everyone is doing well today!

Sorry about all the sickness in your house and yikes on the ER visits!

The funny/ironic thing about me being the brunt of someones attack last night (and NOT by you, MHM) is that I'm the one who has more or less stayed on topic, at least according to the posts that were dug up last night by Merle. Which brings me to yet another thing that happens on some threads--personal vendettas, including ones that are out of the blue. Perhaps they should be kept to PM or some people should take a deep breath and think twice before being nasty. Constructive dialog and conversations are one thing, but that's not what occured with one poster. BTW, I took that to PM (and not a nasty one, either) and haven't yet gotten a response.

 

[JunieJay]

Tigger&Belle and JunieJay I hope everything works out with your testing. It is so stressful waiting for results.

Thanks MHM! You guys try to stay out of the ER, ya hear?

 

[imsorry]

Good morning MHM!!! Hope things go better today!

 

[PixiePop]

I think many of us have felt like the OP at times..I know I have and still do on occasion.

I don't think people are intentionally trying to hurt anyone...it's just something that happens when you get to know someone really well..you have a history. This happens in real life too.

I also think that given a chance these same people would invite you in..if you give them and yourselves half a chance.

 

[KathyTX]

Because it's generally annoying, no matter what thread the private jokes migrate to. Sorry to sound harsh, but there it is.

And there, in a nutshell, is the feeling of many posters on the forum.

Hijacking threads is rude, and we get many complaints about little groups who derail various threads with inside jokes and cliquish personal comments.

And I agree that it's ironic that this thread went that direction.

We have allowed many of the monster "clique" threads to stay, and that's where the inside jokes and little personal comments that the rest of the members here don't care about should stay. You have a place for your party, but please don't try to derail others' threads.

We've had to shutdown some of those threads when they began to spillover into many other threads, hijacking them and disrupting the boards. If you don't want to see that happen to *your* clique thread, it's best to contain the jokes there and try to not annoy the other posters with inside jokes that don't make sense to anyone else.