Do I worry about neighbor kids?

la79al

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May 24, 2005
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Next spring we are planning on telling DD about our Disney trip for her birthday. The problem is that we are going to be having her birthday party at our house and the neighbor kids will more than likely be invited. I guess the real problem is that I'm pretty sure the parents of some of the kids would never in a million years be able to afford a Disney trip for their kids. So do we feel bad about letting DD open the tickets, etc with the other kids there or do we just let DD enjoy her birthday? Also, when the neighbor kids do find out about the trip, and start asking our kids to bring them something back, how do we handle that? I really don't want to limit the kids friends by income levels but at the same time I don't want our kids to spend their vacation feeling guilty because they haven't bought anything for the neighbors.
 
Personally, I would tell her about it maybe that evening after the party with kids during a special birthday dinner. Say, "We saved the big birthday present for last..." You're right - this could put the neighbor kids' parents in a tough spot, and you might risk the kids either being hostile to her because they are jealous, or they may be happy for her.

I'd definitely save it for a private presentation. That's what we did when we told the kids last Christmas. We told them about it at home before we headed out to the grandparents' house.

Other than that, she's going to be thrilled!!! :banana:
 
I agree with BionicEar, I would present the Disney trip gift during family time. She may be too excited at the party to appreciate the gift--or too excited about the gift and lose interest in her party. You have valid concerns. Doing the trip gift as a family presentation will eliminate most of them. Enjoy!
 
I definately would save it for a private family celebration. Seems to much in your face to have it happen during the kid party.

If the other kids ask for things to be brought back for them. Just have your child explain that they are only allowed to purchase a sovenior or two and don't have enough to bring back any extras. May be you could gather some of the free stickers they give out as souveniours or do a few pressed pennies....
 

I agree also that it should be done during a private family party. It may be tough for the other kids to understand why they can't go if their parents cannot afford to take them.

As for suveniors, if the kids really did want to bring their friends something back, have them bring back a small disney trinket. There are always things on clearance for a few dollars or even to buy a bunch of Mickey Mouse suckers would be a cool idea. :)
 
We never did family presents at a "friends" party. Usually my DD's had a party with their friends and then had a seperate "party" with family. I would also not give her the "real ticket" but a scanned copy (printed on card stock), just in case.
 
I agree with the others about doing the Disney gift as a private, family gift.

I don't know how old your DD is, but my DD (now 11) has always thought of her friends while on vacation. She saves her money to purchase something for her close friends (about 4 other girls). One of her friends does it, too. The others don't, but it's not a big deal. Usually we find things for a few dollars -- the candy mint tins were a hit. A postcard might also be a nice way to remember friends. We've never had a friend ASK that we bring anything back (other than good weather).
 
disneychrista said:
We never did family presents at a "friends" party. Usually my DD's had a party with their friends and then had a seperate "party" with family. I would also not give her the "real ticket" but a scanned copy (printed on card stock), just in case.

We do the same. I think it is hard for kids to watch too many gifts being opened and their gifts get overshadowed by family gifts (esp. a trip to Disney :) )
Give her the gift seperately as others have suggested and it will be a second birthday celebration! All the more fun.
 
I agree with all of the others. Tell her about the trip privately, after the party.

For souveniers, we brought back Disney lollipops for our kids' friends. You might get lucky and find a package of candy that has individually wrapped pieces that you can distruibute to a bunch of kids.
 
I WOULD NOT let my child open the tickets/info for a Disney trip in front of other children. That is just rude, IMO.

Have another little cake after the BIG party.

Also I would tell the neighbor kids when they ask for gifts, no promises and maybe plan on bringing them stickers or pretzels to share with all when you get home.
 
I understand that it is hard to buy for everyone but if you do want to do a little something it is easy. We bought a package of about 6-8 pens that were large and really cute for probably about $6.00 and split them up. It wasn't a lot but they are useful and CUTE!
 
We have moved often and many times had friends/neighbors whose kids had never been to WDW and probably never will get to go. We usually try to bring back something little for our closest friends. Sometimes just the freebie shampoos and soaps and some stickers, sometimes candy. We sometimes send friends postcards. Once I even let our kids buy water bottles (they were a pretty low price) to 4 kids who lived next door. I knew they would like/use them. Agree with everyone else, open the family gift after everyone leaves!
 
:wave2: I think you should wait until after the party. I would find the biggest box possible and put the things in that box and let her open it that night. I know how you feel but you cant take on the responsibility to buy something for everyone and you want you dd to have a good time without worring about if she got everyone something. HAVE FUN!!!!
 
I also think it is a good idea to wait until all the kids go home before giving her the gift. Depending on her excitement it might over shadow the other kids gifts. As for the neighbor kids asking her to bring stuff back for them, I would be surprised if they did. My daughter has never had kids ask her to bring stuff back for them, even though she always does bring a gift for the 'best' friend.
 
You might even give her the Birnbaum for Kids book when she opens to tickets to help her see where she is going. As for bringing things back, we brought back little cookies shaped like Minnie and Mickey for the kids in our neighborhood. These other "little things" ideas sound good too!
 
"I guess the real problem is that I'm pretty sure the parents of some of the kids would never in a million years be able to afford a Disney trip for their kids."

May I ask how you know they will never be able too? That just sounds very snobbish and not very neighborly. As for buying little gifts for the neighbors that should come from your heart because you want too. DH and I already know that our DD will want to buy things for her little friends. We will set aside money for her to do that. Thats just how DD is. God bless her heart :lovestruc
 
I recently attended a birthday party at a skating rink for one of my kindergarten daughter's friends. There were maybe 8 little girls there and the parents/grandparents brought ALL the millions of gifts they got the birthday girl as well. I thought it was completely disgusting to make the kids sit through the opening of all those presents! Birthday Girl probably had 20+ wrapped presents from family PLUS all the stuff from the other girls. Everyone INCLUDING Bday Girl was bored.

Open family gifts before or after the party with friends!!!!!
 
hollyb said:
May I ask how you know they will never be able too [go to WDW]? That just sounds very snobbish and not very neighborly. As for buying little gifts for the neighbors that should come from your heart because you want too. DH and I already know that our DD will want to buy things for her little friends. We will set aside money for her to do that. Thats just how DD is. God bless her heart :lovestruc

la79al, I don't think you're being snobbish or not very neighborly at all. When you are close enough to people you very may well have a sense of what their situation is, and I think it is good of you to consider their feelings. As the other posters have said, hold off until after the friends have left to give the "big" present, and if your circumstances allow you can probably find something small to bring back for the other children.
 


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