Disneyed out?

[kdzgon]

You are just witnessing what our society has become, only in megadoses. Sorry to say that parenting skills have become a thing of the past. Its easier to make excuses than to put the effort in to discipline. And if I get flames about this, so be it. I am a mother of 3 boys, all with different personalities, and NEVER have they acted like the children of today. But don't blame the kids, its the lazy parents who are to blame. Go at other times of the year if you can, when school is in session. It is definitely a different Disney world! Anymore, I speak up when a rude child or adult makes a scene. They don't care about you, its about time we remind them that we're not puttin up with it!

I agree with your comment about society, but I have to say it is more difficult even for well-intentioned parents to raise well-behaved children nowadays. I raised 4 kids (11 years as a single parent) close in age (they range from 30 to 26). I could take those kids to ANY restaurant and I would often get compliments on how well-behaved they were. We are now raising a DGS, and I am ashamed to say I hate going out to eat because I never know if I will be embarrassed - if we take two or more of the grands, I am pretty sure we WILL be embarrassed before the end of the meal. My parenting is still considered "conservative" by many yet I have moderated it from when raising my kids, but at least years ago as parents we were allowed to make mistakes with our kids - and then (hopefully) learn from them. These days, everyone is watching and has a "better idea" of how to raise a child, and most have no problem pointing out your mistakes, no matter how small (or how wrong they are!). The result seems to be an over-indulgence of youth rather than expectations of accountability and/or responsibility of actions.

Plus, I don't know if it is the influence of "kid's meals" that include a toy, or a more indulgent society, slower meal service or something else, but I have noticed that many parents bring "entertainment" along to get through a meal anywhere other than a fast food establishment. I am recently guilty of it myself, although I can only imagine my reaction had any of my children needed such a "distraction" back then!

Ahh, maybe I'm just getting "soft" in my old age, but it sure seems to be a different world raising kids today.

 

[BWV Dreamin]

I agree with your comment about society, but I have to say it is more difficult even for well-intentioned parents to raise well-behaved children nowadays. I raised 4 kids (11 years as a single parent) close in age (they range from 30 to 26). I could take those kids to ANY restaurant and I would often get compliments on how well-behaved they were. We are now raising a DGS, and I am ashamed to say I hate going out to eat because I never know if I will be embarrassed - if we take two or more of the grands, I am pretty sure we WILL be embarrassed before the end of the meal. My parenting is still considered "conservative" by many yet I have moderated it from when raising my kids, but at least years ago as parents we were allowed to make mistakes with our kids - and then (hopefully) learn from them. These days, everyone is watching and has a "better idea" of how to raise a child, and most have no problem pointing out your mistakes, no matter how small (or how wrong they are!). The result seems to be an over-indulgence of youth rather than expectations of accountability and/or responsibility of actions.

Plus, I don't know if it is the influence of "kid's meals" that include a toy, or a more indulgent society, slower meal service or something else, but I have noticed that many parents bring "entertainment" along to get through a meal anywhere other than a fast food establishment. I am recently guilty of it myself, although I can only imagine my reaction had any of my children needed such a "distraction" back then!

Ahh, maybe I'm just getting "soft" in my old age, but it sure seems to be a different world raising kids today.

Well, you are the grandmother, not the parent, so it is a little different. Still, your grand acts up, take them out of the restaraunt, correct them, then take them back in. They still act up, take them back out again. Forget the compromising, forget the prizes later talk, tell them your not puttin up with it and you will LEAVE if they don't cut it out. Then follow thru with your demands, they will call your bluff if you don't. Yeah, you might be out some money this time, but I bet future events will be different. Its not rocket science, YOU are the BOSS, not them!

 

[2Princes2Princesses]

Well, you are the grandmother, not the parent, so it is a little different. Still, your grand acts up, take them out of the restaraunt, correct them, then take them back in. They still act up, take them back out again. Forget the compromising, forget the prizes later talk, tell them your not puttin up with it and you will LEAVE if they don't cut it out. Then follow thru with your demands, they will call your bluff if you don't. Yeah, you might be out some money this time, but I bet future events will be different. Its not rocket science, YOU are the BOSS, not them!

For my son, leaving WOULD be the prize. He usually starts acting up because he wants to leave.

 

[alldiz]

For my son, leaving WOULD be the prize. He usually starts acting up because he wants to leave.

Mine too

I would have to make her stay in the hotel room though....not take her
in the pool....cause thats what she wants
Kerri

 

[eva]

For my son, leaving WOULD be the prize. He usually starts acting up because he wants to leave.

If leaving meant going straight to the hotel room an sitting on a chair for time out, it might not be considered much of a reward anymore.

This does not pertain to this poster. But I think that some parents just do not want to pay the price that it takes to raise decent kids anymore. They don't want their child's behavior to interfere with their dinner or fun. Sometimes you just have to suck it up and ruin your fun to correct the child's bad conduct.

 

[Sammie]

If leaving meant going straight to the hotel room an sitting on a chair for time out, it might not be considered much of a reward anymore.

This does not pertain to this poster. But I think that some parents just do not want to pay the price that it takes to raise decent kids anymore. They don't want their child's behavior to interfere with their dinner or fun. Sometimes you just have to suck it up and ruin your fun to correct the child's bad conduct.

This is probably more true at Disney World than anywhere. Parent's who, due to the cost and such, feel that even if the kid is misbehaving, they are not going to let that interfere with thier enjoyment of the park or dinner. Of course the kids know that and use it to their ability. Many times being a good parent means making yourself miserable.

 

[kdzgon]

If leaving meant going straight to the hotel room an sitting on a chair for time out, it might not be considered much of a reward anymore.

This does not pertain to this poster. But I think that some parents just do not want to pay the price that it takes to raise decent kids anymore. They don't want their child's behavior to interfere with their dinner or fun. Sometimes you just have to suck it up and ruin your fun to correct the child's bad conduct.

ITA, and will even admit it probably does pertain to us, as well. It's a tough line to walk between grand & parent when you are doing the full-time parenting yet have other grands as well, and we don't always get it right for sure.

Of course, maybe the reason I had more success with my 4 is as a single mom, it was MY rules, period. Now, I have "Grandpa" to contend with as well. Believe me, I have indeed recently returned to my rules (we leave - and it's NOT to anyplace he wants to go) - embarrasses the heck out of DH, but nowadays I usually just let him (DH) "deal". End result, we had no scenes this trip to WDW, although we only had one grand with us.

We as a society indulge our kids too much, though, and I still stand by the judging comments. I feel for parents today in that regard.

 

[OlderMan]

I have 2 DD's 9 and (almost) 11. DW and I are in our mid 50's.

I can't begin to tell you how many times I've literally stopped the car, taken the girls out and either lectured them or told them to get what ever is bothering out of their systems.

Several years ago, we had planned a day/overnight trip to St Augustine--about 2-2.5 hrs north of us.

Less than a half hour from home, my DD's began acting up. DW and I both, told them to behave. Needless to say, they did not. At the next exit I got off the interstate and turned around heading for home.

I told DD's it they apologized before we got to the next exit, we would continue our trip. They didn't apologize, so I headed back home. They didn't apologize until we got off at the exit near our house. TOO LATE!!

Remember, if you make threats to your children, you have to follow through!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[nunzia]

This is probably more true at Disney World than anywhere. Parent's who, due to the cost and such, feel that even if the kid is misbehaving, they are not going to let that interfere with thier enjoyment of the park or dinner. Of course the kids know that and use it to their ability. Many times being a good parent means making yourself miserable.

Very well put! Very true too, but worth it in the long run.