Dinner Guest Question - WWYD?

[disneyfav4ever]

There's someone coming over to our house for dinner, a friend of the family, so we are all eating together. This lady is a vegetarian, but the only thing she does not eat is red meat, she will eat poultry and fish.

Anyway, my mom's cooking, but is making it with a mixture of ground beef and turkey. This is not something our friend would eat if she knew there was red meat in it, but my parent's don't plan on telling her, and have told me not to.

So my question is should I listen to my dad, and not say anything, since according to him, she "won't notice." Or should I tell her, since I know eating meat is something she's against?

 

[HelenePA]

She'll notice trust me. Let your mom do the explaning. I dont eat red meat either.

 

[HappyHeart]

Why would it be so hard for your mother to cook something without red meat? If she has invited someone into her home, she should be willing to accomodate them.

It's not as if this guest just showed up out of the blue and expected your mom to cook her dinner.

You should tell your mother to alter her menu.

 

[disneyfav4ever]

My mom's logic is that the ground beef was much cheaper then the ground turkey, so she bought a pound of beef, and a pound of turkey, instead of just two pounds of turkey, which would have cost a whole dollar more.

 

[HappyHeart]

And for one dollar she is willing to make her invited guest completely uncomfortable?

Please tell your mother that there are people out there that have allergic reactions to red meat. Their throats close up, just like other food allergies.

 

[Liberty Belle]

Tell your mom that you talked to vegetarians who said the lady will definitely be able to tell. Stress to your mom how embarrassing this will be for her. If she still refuses, I think you have two options, decline dinner for yourself so you don't have to be there and experience the uncomfortableness or go buy some ground turkey yourself to contribute to the dinner.

I guess you could tell the woman, but I think this would cause a bigger rift between you and your parents.

 

[disneyfav4ever]

And for one dollar she is willing to make her invited guest completely uncomfortable?

Apparently.

Please tell your mother that there are people out there that have allergic reactions to red meat. Their throats close up, just like other food allergies.

I'm sure she's aware of that, though she knows that our friend is a vegetarian by choice, so I guess she feels that she can serve red meat without any consequences.

We went out with this friend once, and had soup. It wasn't until after we had eaten the soup, that we found out that it was made with beef broth, (we had assumed it was made with chicken or vegetable broth, since it was a cream soup,) and she felt horrible about eating it.

 

[LanaJayne]

This makes me really sad. I would tell the friend so that she decide for herself if she is willing to eat it. I would feel so betrayed if I found out later that my friends had lied to me about something that they knew was important to me.

If your mom insists on preparing the whole dinner with a mixture of meats she has a moral obligation to tell her guests what is in the food she prepared. Why can't she make a portion of only turkey for her guest? I don't understand the disregard of common decency that this family is showing.
Wow! With friends like these......

 

[bicker]

I would recommend that you tell your friend in advance. This is not the kind of thing to leave up to providence, unless you really don't care about that friendship. Don't be surprised if your mother's reticence to adjust to the friend's dietary preferences results in a degradation of the friendship anyway.

 

[HappyHeart]

I just don't understand how someone could invite a person into their home, knowing they don't eat red meat, yet serve it to them anyway.

Who does that?

 

[HelenePA]

Everyone who knows me knows I dont eat red meat. I would be livid if they "tricked" me into eating it..

 

[ckay87]

Introducing a fatty ingredient into a diet that is not accustomed to it can have some really embarassing consequences for your friend. Take it from me. That's all I'm saying.

 

[wardfamily1]

I'd be ticked if I was the guest. My brother did this once with venison. He knows I don't like venison and thought I wouldn't notice. I thought it was hamburger and it went bad. When he told me it was venison, I was so ticked off, I left. I always turned down dinner invitations after that.

Who invited the guest, was it your mom or someone else in the family?
It sounds like your mom doesn't want this guest to EVER come over for dinner again.

 

[disneyfav4ever]

Who invited the guest, was it your mom or someone else in the family?

It was one of my parents, I'm assuming my mom, since my dad doesn't really invite people over.

 

[SpaceGirl]

Please just ask your Mother to split the Entree while cooking, then half can be with turkey half can be with beef. No added expence but your guest will not be betrayed.

 

[bicker]

Well, of course she'd need to just keep the ground turkey separate from the ground beef to start. Splitting the entree while cooking might be a bit too late.

 

[disneyfav4ever]

Please just ask your Mother to split the Entree while cooking, then half can be with turkey half can be with beef. No added expence but your guest will not be betrayed.

I would but she already mixed the two before I knew what she was doing.

 

[java]

Wow I am really surprised that she would do that to an invited guest. next weekend I am having my vegetarian friend over to a bbq with my carnivore clan- I make sure to keep the meat stuff seperate from her veggies.
Why would your mom do that? Around here the turkey ground meat is cheaper than beef. And do you really think that she wouldn't figure it out? I think your mom is out of line here.

 

[HappyHeart]

Is this a friend of your mothers, or do you consider this person your friend as well?

If this person is also a friend of yours, call them, tell them what your mother is doing, and tell them to make up an excuse to cancel dinner this evening.

 

[Carly_Roach]

I think you have two options, decline dinner for yourself so you don't have to be there and experience the uncomfortableness or go buy some ground turkey yourself to contribute to the dinner.

I guess you could tell the woman, but I think this would cause a bigger rift between you and your parents.

I agree. In fact, I would go buy the extra pound of turkey and eat the cost of it yourself if this is bothering you so much. Actions always speak louder than words. If someone did that to me, I wouldn't accept dinner invitations from them in the future, either. In fact, they probably wouldn't be people I'd want to be visiting or speaking with again.

Someone recently ruined my sister's favorite meal by offering to make the gravy for her. They were thinking they could substitute a "healthy" kind of gravy for her regular kind and she'd never know the difference. Wrong. All of us noticed the difference. It was so bland and tasteless that we could tell right away something was wrong with it.

The meal was a disaster and my sister will never accept ANY kind of meal help in the future from this person again. Not to mention the feelings of betrayal that this person thought they could "trick" us into eating the way she thought we should eat.

Buy the extra pound of turkey and tell your mom to make hamburgers or meatloaf for the family out of what she bought.