Did you pay for your wedding &/or get help from others? What year was it?

[Christine]

Just reading the replies, with the exception of the standard "New York" weddings, the 1980s weddings were very affordable. I know it's all relative, but not really. When I look at some of these 1980s prices (mine included) the prices seem very low; however, you might think that back at that time we were all gasping at the cost; but really, we were not. A decent wedding with a meal and a good amount of guests didn't create massive debt for average, middle class people. Doesn't seem the case today unless you go out of your way and work very hard to do it on a budget. It wasn't that hard to accomplish then.

 

[Mrs. Ciz]

Just reading the replies, with the exception of the standard "New York" weddings, the 1980s weddings were very affordable. I know it's all relative, but not really. When I look at some of these 1980s prices (mine included) the prices seem very low; however, you might think that back at that time we were all gasping at the cost; but really, we were not. A decent wedding with a meal and a good amount of guests didn't create massive debt for average, middle class people. Doesn't seem the case today unless you go out of your way and work very hard to do it on a budget. It wasn't that hard to accomplish then.

We can probably blame Martha Stewart for the huge jump in cost. Her first wedding book came out in 1987. By the time I was planning my 1990 wedding, the book was standard reading for all brides to be. Frozen vodka bars, seafood stations, antique get away cars...all the little custom touches...it adds up to a very expensive wedding. I couldn't afford the full Martha Stewart style experience....and I still spent $10,000 for the whole wedding for 140 guests.

 

[mjkacmom]

We can probably blame Martha Stewart for the huge jump in cost. Her first wedding book came out in 1987. By the time I was planning my 1990 wedding, the book was standard reading for all brides to be. Frozen vodka bars, seafood stations, antique get away cars...all the little custom touches...it adds up to a very expensive wedding. I couldn't afford the full Martha Stewart experience....and I still spent $10,000 for the whole wedding for 140 guests.

She's from the NYC metro area.

 

[5kidsmommy]

1994, we couldn't afford to have a large wedding and either could our parents so we got married at the courthouse and had a fun reception at my MIL's house that we paid for.

 

[DawnM]

Married in 1995 and my parents paid for it.

 

[Mrs. Ciz]

She's from the NYC metro area.

Exactly! Her books and magazines brought "New York Style" (along with additional costs for all the extras) to brides all over the country. She changed brides' perceptions about what a wedding should look like.

 

[dznymemories]

My oldest brother paid for our wedding. My Mother told me that he had given me $300. It was actually twice that amount, but she knew that I would go over budget. I went to the the downtown Hudson store and asked to see bridesmaid dresses. I found a beautiful dress with a lace top and a full tulle skirt in a ballerina length for $25.00. I asked to have it ordered in white. I was able to find my maid of honors dress for the same amount. I bought a seed pearl tiara and bought the material to make my veil. We purchased the bouquets, boutonnieres and corsages.
We had a small reception at home in the early afternoon with hot and cold canapes and other appetizers, coffee, tea and punch as well as a bar. We had a beautiful three tiered cake.
A friend who had a photography studio did our pictures as a gift.
This was in 1960. We have four children, eight grandchildren and a great-granddaughter. We will celebrate 55 years of being best friends in October.

 

[NewRVLady]

Martha Stewart may have given brides 25 years ago idea but TODaY it is

PINTEREST

That drives the Wedding Idea Machine

We collected pins on several boards for DIL's wedding....dresses...flowers...centerpieces

And it seems from articles I have read it is like that for many Brides all over the USA

 

[bsblady01]

we got married in april of 2005 on my grandparents farm in upstate ny I was 8 months prego with my first child

 

[DeaverTex]

I know....it's almost a brag thread.
???
Almost like if you paid for it yourself you were better than people whose parents paid for theirs??

The only reason we paid for everything ourselves was that if we waited for our parents to pay for it, we'd still be living in sin.

 

[wishesuponastar]

Further details of our wedding in 1996....DH and I paid $50 per person for the banquet hall (total for 100 guests $5,000). $50 for clergyman, $75 for violinist at church. My dress was $300 from Davids Bridal. My bridesmaids paid for their dresses which were found off the rack at Davids Bridal.

Favors were ceramic churches (we met at church) that I found at a craft store approx. $4 each x 50. The only flowers we bought were bridal bouquet, grooms boutineer, bridesmaids bouquets and flower girls hair wreath. No flowers for reception tables. We were on a budget.

Just today my Dh was telling his best man that he should have listened to me and got married in Hawaii, just the two of us. I don't think it would have been cheaper but there would have been less stress.


Now, my daughter is getting married in 2016 and they are paying for it as far as I know. Total for venue is $25,000 yikes!! She aways had expensive taste.

 

[sukhakuli]

We got married in 2000. My parents paid the majority, but it was a pretty cheap wedding. Still, very lovely, and exactly what I wanted. I didn't want a big to-do. We were married outside, had a nice sit down dinner with only our closest relatives and friends, and that was it. Dh and I paid for our honeymoon, which was also budget friendly, but at my very favorite place.

We got married straight out of college, which we both paid for on our own. And my only sibling eloped so my parents wanted to have one wedding in the family.

We are planning on just offering the kids a flat amount of money to get them started in life. They can use it for a wedding, house, or whatever. If they make a mistake and spend it on stupid junk, well, hopefully that will be a good lesson for them.

 

[Julia M]

Married in 1991 and my parents paid for it all.

Same for me! In addition, my parents hosted an "after wedding" party for out of town family and friends. Our wedding (Catholic mass) was at 10 am and our reception from 12-5. So we had about 200 at the wedding and then 100 people at my parents house from about 5 until 2am. Then everyone came back over around noon the next day for brunch and opening presents (that's our family tradition)

 

[SandiR]

We got married in 2000. We paid for it ourselves, but both DH's parents and my mother gave us a substantial amount of money as wedding gifts. It helped a lot.

 

[leebee]

DD21 and her boyfriend have looked at rings, so I am seeing a wedding in the not-too-distant future! DH and I would love to "give" DD her wedding, but we'd need to sit down together, talk about ideas, look at the costs, etc., before we'd agree to pay it all vs. give them a chunk of money (OK, a small chunk, LOL!). DD is very cost-conscious and frugal, so I am hoping it'll all work out. We'll see. I know people think we are crazy for wanting to pay for her wedding, as by the time it rolls around they'll both be gainfully employed, but we do. Maybe it has something to do with the way my mom was so hands-off about our wedding, to the point of suggesting we "just elope and forget all this foolishness." She literally wanted nothing to do with our wedding, and wasn't even interested in talking about details. I was secretly afraid that she might not even show up for the wedding (she did, though). I will never forget how hurt I was that my mom didn't want to participate in the biggest day of my life (to that point). I don't want DD to ever, EVER feel that way.

 

[emmybee]

After 10 years and one child together, we tied the knot last year. We paid for everything ourselves, of course, because we were both pushing 40! We found an inexpensive senior center that was in a lovely old Spanish-style building. We had a taco guy that everyone raved about. We had a dj. That charged us a party rate b/c I didn't want the usual wedding embellishments of speeches, intros, 1st dance. Planning even a 'simple' party was hard and overwhelming for an introvert/anti-social person such as myself. In the end, I wish I could have invited more of my coworker friends, but money ruled that decision.

 

[Dizlvr]

Married in 1996 and my parents paid for the wedding and honeymoon.

 

[E&Cmom]

We were married in 2001. We were already 31 and 35 so we had been both working and living out of our parents house for years. I had lost my mom when I was 26. We paid for our wedding ourself but DHs parents did give us a very generous gift at our wedding . We had a nice but small wedding with around 55 people.

 

[North of Mouse]

Dh & I paid for our wedding, honeymoon, etc. in 1967. The wedding was for family only - the reception at my parents was for family and close friends. - we were frugal and have no regrets - was very lovely.

 

[bjscheel]

1996 and my parents paid. I was a sophomore in college so I really had no resources of my own. I think DH's parents paid for photographer and rehearsal dinner. It was not an expensive affair. Ceremony in our local church, and reception at the 4-H hall. Rent for the hall was probably $100 or so. My mom made my dress, one bridesmaid dress, and the flower girl dresses, his mom made the other bridesmaid dress. I think the moms made some of the food too. My brother DJ'd. It was your basic, inexpensive small town Iowa wedding

Since I was at college, my mom did a lot of the planning and I just okayed it- I'm a bit fuzzy on the details!