Did you and your DF agreen on your dress?

[MainStMandy]

I am starting to become very torn about my dress.

#1- I picked it out thinking the wedding was going to be at SBP. I am not sure it "fits" the WP

#2- Df keeps picking out more ball gown, strapless dresses. I don't want to change my dress because of what HE wants, but I have a fear I will walk down the aisle and he will be less than thrilled.

Anyone else feel that way?

 

[dhay]

IMO I think you need to wear what you like and what YOU will feel beautiful in. I think your dress will be stunning at the WP, and once your DF sees the whole getup I am sure he will think you look lovely as well.

Don't start second guessing yourself! You looked amazing in it. And don't worry about what "works" with your location or the season etc. Do what you want. If I rememeber your first wedding was not what you wanted- don't make that mistake here

 

[MainStMandy]

Thank you!! I know...I need to just stick with what I loved. And I do love my dress and love that's it not a traditional ballgown. I just wish df would stop picking out dresses!!

 

[CDNTech]

We're doing a VR on 1-5-10 and dh had input into my dress... only because I knew I picked a style he doesn't like.

Had we just been getting married for the first time, he wouldn't have had any input and I would have chosen what I wanted... actually that's not quite the way it happened. Someone basically chose for me when the seamstress didn't sew what I wanted and I ended up hating the somewhat of a 'wedding' dress I had... it was white, had a train... that's about as close to wedding dress as it came. The hazards of getting married as a young barely 20 yr old... at least I got the dh part right, 10 years later (with two kids) and going strong.

This time around I found exactly what I wanted, it screams wedding dress, and I just needed to know that dh would be okay with it since I know how much he hates pick-ups in a dress.

I love pick-ups in a dress. I found THE dress in about 5 minutes flat in the first store I looked in... I took pictures of me in it and then debated whether I could go through with it. In the end, I ended up showing the pictures to dh to get his opinion.

He thinks I look gorgeous... so I could have just gone with my first instincts and not shown him the dress until the VR, but I just needed to know.

It ended up being a good thing for us because I like sharing everything about this VR with him. We're planning it together and we ended up trying/buying 4 different shirts before we found 'the one' that looked fantastic *and* matched the ivory of my dress. Who knew ivory could be so hard to match.

Anyway, all that to say that if you've got the dress and you love it, then tell DF the dress search is over and his input is no longer required. Bottom line is he will think you look gorgeous in whatever you wear that day because you are walking down that aisle to become his wife. Whatever makes you *feel* beautiful, will make you *look* beautiful.

 

[MainStMandy]

We're doing a VR on 1-5-10 and dh had input into my dress... only because I knew I picked a style he doesn't like.

Had we just been getting married for the first time, he wouldn't have had any input and I would have chosen what I wanted... actually that's not quite the way it happened. Someone basically chose for me when the seamstress didn't sew what I wanted and I ended up hating the somewhat of a 'wedding' dress I had... it was white, had a train... that's about as close to wedding dress as it came. The hazards of getting married as a young barely 20 yr old... at least I got the dh part right, 10 years later (with two kids) and going strong.

This time around I found exactly what I wanted, it screams wedding dress, and I just needed to know that dh would be okay with it since I know how much he hates pick-ups in a dress.

I love pick-ups in a dress. I found THE dress in about 5 minutes flat in the first store I looked in... I took pictures of me in it and then debated whether I could go through with it. In the end, I ended up showing the pictures to dh to get his opinion.

He thinks I look gorgeous... so I could have just gone with my first instincts and not shown him the dress until the VR, but I just needed to know.

It ended up being a good thing for us because I like sharing everything about this VR with him. We're planning it together and we ended up trying/buying 4 different shirts before we found 'the one' that looked fantastic *and* matched the ivory of my dress. Who knew ivory could be so hard to match.

Anyway, all that to say that if you've got the dress and you love it, then tell DF the dress search is over and his input is no longer required. Bottom line is he will think you look gorgeous in whatever you wear that day because you are walking down that aisle to become his wife. Whatever makes you *feel* beautiful, will make you *look* beautiful.

Thank you for sharing that with me. I do love my dress and you said exactly what my mom said. I think it's perfect!!

 

[DisneyBrideToni]

My DH always said he wanted me in something "not poofy". He wanted it to be very simple and tailored. I ended up buying a poofy dress anyway because that is what I wanted. He told me that I looked gorgeous and even said wow to me at the altar so I say keep your dress (which is gorgeous) and he will love it anyway. After all, you are his bride. All men think their brides are beautiful.

 

[Lindsay22]

My DH told me that he didn't care what my dress looked like, but he repeatedly said that he likes pickups and that wedding dresses don't look like wedding dresses unless they have pickups. So I picked out a dress with that in mind. I'm not a huge fan of pickups so I found a dress that only had a few and didn't make me look like a cupcake.

If I had tried on a zillion pickup dresses and looked awful I would not have gotten a pickup dress, I would have picked something out and warned DH in advance that the dress didn't have pickups because I looked awful.

He will love you in anything you wear no matter what.

Here's a good example for you. My two friends were married last year. He said that the dress must be white, it must not be poofy, it must be strapless etc... She got an ivory dress that worked with her skin tone, more on the poofy side and that had straps (little ones). He cried like a baby when she walked down the aisle.

 

[MainStMandy]

My DH always said he wanted me in something "not poofy". He wanted it to be very simple and tailored. I ended up buying a poofy dress anyway because that is what I wanted. He told me that I looked gorgeous and even said wow to me at the altar so I say keep your dress (which is gorgeous) and he will love it anyway. After all, you are his bride. All men think their brides are beautiful.

My DH told me that he didn't care what my dress looked like, but he repeatedly said that he likes pickups and that wedding dresses don't look like wedding dresses unless they have pickups. So I picked out a dress with that in mind. I'm not a huge fan of pickups so I found a dress that only had a few and didn't make me look like a cupcake.

If I had tried on a zillion pickup dresses and looked awful I would not have gotten a pickup dress, I would have picked something out and warned DH in advance that the dress didn't have pickups because I looked awful.

He will love you in anything you wear no matter what.

Here's a good example for you. My two friends were married last year. He said that the dress must be white, it must not be poofy, it must be strapless etc... She got an ivory dress that worked with her skin tone, more on the poofy side and that had straps (little ones). He cried like a baby when she walked down the aisle.

Thank you both for your story's. I do love my dress and you are probably right...once he sees it he will love it too. It's not like I am expecting him to shout out, Whadya buy that for??

 

[CDNTech]

Thank you both for your story's. I do love my dress and you are probably right...once he sees it he will love it too. It's not like I am expecting him to shout out, Whadya buy that for??

I so wanna see the video of the groom that does that... titled "How I knew he was not "the one".

 

[Petals & Pixie Dust]

DF wanted to see the dress-at least a picture before I walked down the aisle in it. I said no. He wanted to have warning just in case he didn't like the dress. I said that it would be obvious whether he liked the dress or didn't and if he didn't I would be crushed.

Needless to say when I told him I got the dress and the reactions of the people in the bridal shop-he never asked to see it. He said that if strangers had that kind of reaction he was good with it.

The dress is ME. Not him or what he wanted -which I'm really not sure I even asked...

Your dress is stunning! When you have the whole ensemble together against the WP backdrop it will be elegant and classic.

Do what YOU feel is best for YOU. You have to be comfortable and love it just as much as he does.


Have you seen Bride Wars? There is a part where one of them is trying on her dress and doesn't fit into it. Her DF is coming to the door and she's upset. He tries to say something like "What is the big deal-it's just a dress." She comes back with something to the tune of "It's not just a dress! It's a Vera Wang! You work to fit into the dress. The dress isn't made to fit you! What do they teach you in school!"

The moral of the story is that boys don't get it when it comes to girl stuff.

 

[copper4]

imho- DF should not see (or have any right of veto) on your dress before the wedding day- that is truly one of the best moments of that very special day and him seeing it before then takes away from that "wow" moment...

 

[Pirate's Princess]

I just checked DF about the big details, like color. Otherwise I went with what I liked. I've checked with him about other details like hairstyle, jewelry, and the veil.

I'm sure you'll look stunning in whatever you have Mandy. And as long as you're confident, you'll feel and LOOK beautiful

 

[MainStMandy]

Thank you everyone! I think I am just scatterbrained these days...with all the changes that have been made...and Df picking out ballgowns, it just made me crazy.

I do love my dress. Thanks for all the support!!

 

[DisneyDmbNut]

First...he doesn't have to WALK in a ballgown!

I only showed my DH a picture of the dress when I tried it on..but not a full shot..and I was about 50lbs heavier in that shot. One day he was looking over my shoulder and caught a new shot that I had posted on the dis and said "wait..who is that??" but I wouldn't scroll it back...He honestly didn't care what kind of dress I wore.

At one point, after I ordered my dress, for kicks I tried on this big pouffy dress that sent my mother in a panic thinking I was changing the theme..when I told DH about her panic attack he told me "you should buy it just for that reason"...haha..that is because he didn't know it was $2200 more than I paid for my dress.

I kept the dress a secret from him and only showed him the beading when I brought it home..it had the effect I wanted...he was stunned when I stepped out. I can show him pictures all day of clothes but he doesn't understand about what they look like on..It was the whole package of dress, veil, hair, floral...I would stick with the dress you have..I think the WP can be perfect for any dress...

 

[Elsha]

For our VR DH only knows that the dress is medieval/renaissance themed...cause I'm looking for stuff for him and the bridal party to match. He's not allowed to see it period, and as much as he whines half heartedly that we're already married, it's ok cause he knows how important it is to me.

Plus he knows I ain't giving in

Stick with your dress. If you it, you'll be radiant, and he'll love you in it. If you hate your dress, it'll show, and it'll pale in comparison. And it's true, as stated above...he ain't the one walking down the aisle in the dress anyways.

 

[PrincessShea]

Like everything else in a wedding...it depends.

My DH would not have cared if I walked out in a potato sack.

He also didn't care about any of the details and I planned everything myself. I remember asking months ago if he wanted to help and if he cared about the details...he said, "Yes, I care and want to help. What do you want to discuss?" I said, as I showed him the fabric samples, "do you think the chair ribbons should be fuchsia or hot pink?". He then said, "yea I don't care. Do whatever you want."

It all depends on his personality. If your DF is a fashionista then maybe he should have input. Although I seriously doubt on the day of the wedding he is going to care about the dress and will probably think you look gorgeous no matter what.

 

[MainStMandy]

Thank you everyone!!!!

We went to Davids Bridal yesterday to look for MoB dresses (which we found) and while we were there I couldn't help but try on 2 new dresses. My dress was IT thought...I loved it and the other 2 didn't compare. I posted 2 (pretty bad) pics on my PJ.

Thank you again. When I mentioned to df yesterday about picking up my dress and that I was in love with it, but not sure if it was what he had in mind, he said he is sure I look beautiful and will love me in whatever I picked out.