Did I over-react?

[FergieTCat]

As I mentioned, between WW and doing on my own, I've lost 45 pounds since last summer. Obviously, I look thinner and am several dress sizes smaller. I have a long way to go, but I am happy and feel better with what I've accomplished.

People at work have been complimentary, which is fine. Today, one woman said to me "So, how much is it now?" Her tone of voice rubbed me the wrong way, and I said "I don't discuss my weight in terms of numbers." (meaning "It's none of your business") and walked away.

Did I overreact? I tried to be polite, but I am still annoyed. This woman is a nosy body and I don't think my weight loss is her business.

Advice is always appreciated!

 

[karebear1]

Sounds to me like someone is a tad bit envious of someone who is progressing in her life. I think that as long as your reaction was one that was done in a respectful way , you may say what you feel necessary to protect yourself. You will probably get that reaction again, so if you feel like you don't like the way you reacted, you might want to pre think what your reaction could be the next time. Personally, I think you were ok- she's gonna read it the way she wants to anyway.

 

[TigH]

Yeah, what Karen said.



I go back and forth over things like this all the time. Ultimately, I always feel bad if I think I was flip with someone (no matter how much they irked me or deserved it!) Long story short, some stranger at a gas station swore at my dad in front of me several weeks ago. I was FURIOUS! He used the F word and it really upset me! Nobody talks to my dad that way. So then this guy made eye contact with me and gave me a smirk. I said, "Thanks for talking to my father like that. I really appreciate it." And he couldn't apologize fast enough!!! I felt good for "taking the high road". I could have just ripped him a new one, but then we'd have ended up in a shouting match. I hope I made him think that hey, he just swore at some girl's father and maybe next time he will think twice about what he says to a stranger. Or maybe not!

Anyway, there are plenty of people in the world who live to make other people miserable or to make snippy comments. So someone caught you off guard today, but don't worry about whether you sounded polite or not. I think Karen was right, think of a good comeback for next time. I've heard that if someone says something smart like that to you, then you should respond by saying loudly, "I'm sorry, could you repeat that?" or something along that line. It makes them uncomfortable and they usually will just mumble themselves away.

Hugs for you!!!

 

[nativetxn]

What was it Ann Landers used to advise? To reply with, "Why do you ask?"

She was rude. Unless she is your identical twin sister or best friend those numbers are none of her business.

 

[blanq]

I don't think you overreacted either. You can tell a lot by tone of voice, and it sounds to me you knew what the underlying message was, and it wasn't related to the words in her question. You have come too far to let anyone, including this coworker, drag you down.

Linda

 

[bicker]

It is hard to say. Seeing someone lose weight puts many people in a position they're unfamiliar with (since most people around them are simply gaining weight :-\). Many people don't know how to express interest correctly. I had family members, who I know actually care about me, who sounded like that.

I've tried to ignore all perceived slights since I can never be sure whether they're genuinely slights or not, and even if they are, to acknowledge them as such grants them more validity than they deserve.