DH wants to work a 48 hour shift 24&25

[p-nut]

DH calls and said they asked him to work a double shift 24& 25th . He wonders if it would bother me. His normal 24hour shift is the 24th. He said if he works the 25th they would comp him another day off. He does not understand why I am not saying
"sure honey go right ahead" ....It is just the three of us here. We are hundreds of miles from family. My DD is twelve. Am I just being selfish???.....I told him we would talk about it when he gets home...part of me want to be an adult and say go ahead and work it is just another day...and another part is angry that another asst chief would even ask him to do that. They all have family here and he has always worked the holidays for them.
Sorry I just needed to vent a little

 

[luvdzny]

I guess it wouldn't bother me, I would just pick another day to have your family celebration. But that is just me - I guess I would be more upset if there were young children involved. you know with Santa coming but with a 12 year old I think Christmas could be celebrated any day. That being said, if it really upsets you I would talk DH and find out why he wants to do it. Maybe he is trying to help out some other guys with young children at home. Whatever you guys decide I hope you have a very MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

 

[crazyforgoofy]

I'm guessing he's a firefighter or paramedic who works a 24 hour shift.......

I'm also guessing that a part of the reason you're upset with him is that he didn't seem to understand how you and your daughter would feel being alone both Christmas eve and Christmas day. And another part is that you feel he's being taken advantage of and isn't standing up for himself. Both those concerns seem valid to me. Wonder what his response will be when you speak with him face to face.

It he absolutely HAS to work the 25th it would seem he'd get more than comp for another day. How about two or three days? It's Christmas for crying out loud. Perhaps you and your daughter should go to visit relatives over the 24th and 25th if he won't be home.

If he's always worked the holidays for them it may be time for him to simply say, "Sorry, I'm going to spend Christmas day with my family this year."

 

[Tiggeroo]

My father was a fireman. When we were little he always switched and got Christmas eve and morning off. When we got older and Santa wasn't the big thing, he did the same for younger dads. But his shifts weren't 24hours. They were 12, 6am to pm, or vice versa. This way you at least got to have either the morning or the evening.
I know what you mean about being taken advantage of though. Dh lets his work do this all the time and it causes huge fights.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

I'd be selfish too. I would want my dh home on at least one of the days.

Anyway he asked if it would bother you, right? Tell him YES!!!!!

 

[Bon Bon]

Well, I grew up the daughter of a firefighter and know all too well how this works. I can remember waking up some Christmas mornings looking at all of the gifts under the tree and having to wait until Daddy got off work at 5:00 PM to open them. But, I'm sure you're very proud of him and his work. How about you take the celebration to him? I remember doing these family things at the firehouse a lot. Yes, it's Christmas day, when you really think about it, is where you celebrate the most important thing? Remember, your husband is doing a very admirable job, and you should be very proud of yourself for supporting that.

 

[p-nut]

Thank you for the replies

Bon Bon.. that is a great idea but I am afraid I am unable to drive at the moment due to health reasons otherwise I would. I used to bring food to the guys all the time.

luvdzny...the asst chief that wants off does not have any small children. I guess He just wants another day with his family. I think he is getting ready to retire and is trying to use all of his leave days before then.

 

[Kimberle]

Ugghh!! I know exactly how you feel! My Mother is a nurse & always had to work holiday. I can't tell you how many holidays we sat home eating beans & hot dogs (Dad can't cook at all) while everybody else was having a nice dinner.

This is why I haven't been home for a major holiday in 10 years. What's the point in spending all that money flying home, renting a car, etc to "sit"!

I don't "buy" the we'll have holidays "later" and the $$$'s nice. I have a friend who's dad was a fireman. He worked every holiday for triple pay. Well, you know what? He just passed away from cancer in his mid 60's. He never had a chance to retire, they never had "nice" holidays.

I understand certain professions have got to do their "share", but noone should have to pull the "load".

 

[Bon Bon]

Shoot, if I were closer I'd drive you, really I would!

 

[4greatboys]

Awww Tina I would probably not be happy either. He just covered for someone. You guys need to set down some guidelines like if he covers for someone Thanksgiving then he needs to not cover anyone Christmas or vise versa. But covering for someone every holiday is not good.

 

[sap1227]

I would be very mad! In the last month my DH has worked 24s on DS Birthday, my Birthday, Thanksgiving, his work Christmas Party, our Church Christmas Pary and Halloween. He also works on Christmas Eve. If he tried to work on Christmas Day too, I would lose it!! Good luck, I feel for you!!

Christy

 

[CarolA]

My SIL's dad worked Christmas ever since I knew her. However, she said he really did not start that until they were in high school. Then he figured it was his turn. He worked for the City Water and sewer and thier rule seemed to be that the men with older kids worked Christmas so the men/women with young kids could be home. When his teenagers complained he reminded them that someone did it for him when they were young. I liked that, but I can see where it would get old in a hurry!!!

Good luck