Dating someone younger

[sms]

Thanks for your support. I didn't know how you were gonna react. I am going to continue this relationship as long as things are going great and as long as it makes me happy. I have had a lot of different experiences with relationships in my life and so far this has been the funnest and most intriguing yet! I have been lonely and down in the dumps for a long time and he has made me feel very good about myself. I'll let you know how it goes!!

 

[LuvCuteBoys]

You're both over 18... nothing else should matter.

 

[disykat]

I'm five years older than my husband and I know several people who are 10 years older than their husbands and we have no big issues. For fun, sure! However, I seriously don't think I'd go any further than 10 years apart for a long term relationship.

My grandmother was 12 years younger than my grandfather and he started having issues with senility at about 70 and died at 92. That meant she was still in her 50's and 60's and her life centered around him aging. Now I look at my parents and their siblings and tease my husband that's what he has to look forward to - taking care of me. It's sort of a joke with us, but I do worry if I start to age prematurely that it will be more difficult on him because he is younger.

Another issue is our looks. We looked about the same age when we married -we both looked younger than we were. Now that I am in my late 40's and actually look my age while dh still looks like he hasn't aged, I'm having to come to terms with the fact that he looks quite a bit younger than I do. It's a bit of an ego blow to feel like people are confused about your relationship or thinking he might be your child.

 

[BelleWDW]

The only case (celebrity) I can think of that worked like this is Mary Tyler Moore marrying her Mother's doctor. By then she was not able to give him children-which is the big issue

 

[LuvCuteBoys]

I'm five years older than my husband and I know several people who are 10 years older than their husbands and we have no big issues. For fun, sure! However, I seriously don't think I'd go any further than 10 years apart for a long term relationship.

My grandmother was 12 years younger than my grandfather and he started having issues with senility at about 70 and died at 92. That meant she was still in her 50's and 60's and her life centered around him aging. Now I look at my parents and their siblings and tease my husband that's what he has to look forward to - taking care of me. It's sort of a joke with us, but I do worry if I start to age prematurely that it will be more difficult on him because he is younger.

Another issue is our looks. We looked about the same age when we married -we both looked younger than we were. Now that I am in my late 40's and actually look my age while dh still looks like he hasn't aged, I'm having to come to terms with the fact that he looks quite a bit younger than I do. It's a bit of an ego blow to feel like people are confused about your relationship or thinking he might be your child.

But would your grandmother give up everything she had with your grandfather?

Life is short. Anything can happy. There are no guarantees.

As for children... some women can't have children regardless of how old they are. Some men can't father them regardless of how old they are.

 

[hereyago]

For the record, I usually have dated older guys, I think the biggest age difference was 8 years.
My now exdh is 3 years younger, but in actuality he has the maturity level of someone who is still a teenager but we get along well now.

 

[Disney Doll]

My grandmother was 12 years younger than my grandfather and he started having issues with senility at about 70 and died at 92. That meant she was still in her 50's and 60's and her life centered around him aging. Now I look at my parents and their siblings and tease my husband that's what he has to look forward to - taking care of me. It's sort of a joke with us, but I do worry if I start to age prematurely that it will be more difficult on him because he is younger.

This would be my biggest fear about being with someone considerably younger than me.

 

[crz4mm2]

This would be my biggest fear about being with someone considerably younger than me.

Mine Too DD>... that's the only thing I would be concerned about.

 

[BCDisneyFanatic]

The only case (celebrity) I can think of that worked like this is Mary Tyler Moore marrying her Mother's doctor. By then she was not able to give him children-which is the big issue

Susan Sarandon is 12 years older than Tim Robbins, and they've married for 21 years...

 

[disykat]

But would your grandmother give up everything she had with your grandfather?

.

That's not really the point IMO. I KNOW how hard it was for her. I worry that it will be hard for my spouse. The older one does think about those kinds of things. Since I'm the older one in my couple, I'm addressing feelings the OP might have to deal with.

 

[MushyMushy]

Naveen Andrews (from Lost ) is dating or married to Barbara Hershey, who's 20 years older than him. Then we have the Demi/Ashton relationship.

Yes, there is the issue of you looking older than him. I'm 5 years older than my husband and we look farther apart than that. His father didn't start graying until he was in his 50s plus he looked really young for his age. DH is the same way. But if people are tactless enough to say anything, then they deserve to get a glare or humbling remark in return.

 

[JoiseyMom]

Go for it! You are both consenting adults, and as long as you are happy .

I am 7 1/2 years older then my DH, he ain't complaining .

 

[Poohbear123]

My EX and I were 14 years apart...my present Hub is 18 years OLDER! I am 51 and he will be 70 next month...as far as a Younger guy? Yea, I would go for it in a Heartbeat! There is just something about a younger guy and an older woman.....Don't have to share the details but..... I am thrilled for Demi and Ashton...may they be together a long time...

 

[MinnieMe87]

You're both over 18... nothing else should matter.

I agree. If you are happy, then that's all that matters!

 

[Jeafl]

Well, my cousin fell in love with his high school English teacher and once he graduated from high school he begged her to go out with him. She was 12 years older than him, and it took her a couple of years to actually agree to go out with him. The whole teacher/student thing was a real problem for her.

They have now been married about 27 years and they have one of the best marriages I know. It all depends on the people.

 

[daisax]

Naveen Andrews (from Lost ) is dating or married to Barbara Hershey, who's 20 years older than him.

Yes, she's helping to raise the child he had with one of the many women he's cheated on her with.

A friend of mine married a guy 16 years older when she was 26 -- it's really starting to matter now that he's getting ready to retire and she's hitting her prime.

You can have everything in common, but eventually, for most people, interests and energy levels change at different stages of life, and the stages of life are much more distinct the older you get, and they start changing pretty quickly at a certain point.

If you're just looking for a fling... go for it!

 

[MaumeeMom]

You are both consenting adults, I say go for it as long as it makes you both happy.

Juliet Mills is 18 years older than her DH, Maxwell Caulfield. Here is a quote from her Wiki page:

Mills said of the age difference, "Everybody is always interested in the fact that I am married to someone who is a lot younger than I am ... There are no rules, and that's what I believe, because age doesn't really matter. If you meet someone that you're really close to, someone that you love, stick with that."

 

[alexandria674]

I say go for it! As long as you two can work things out, then knock yourself out.

 

[SamRoc]

Life's too short to worry about what other people think. If you are happy together, then I think that's great, no matter what your ages! Go for it!

I agree with you 100%!!!

 

[Principessa1284]

As long as YOU'RE happy and comfortable with the situation, who cares what anyone else thinks? that's what's important. DBF dated a 40 yr old woman when he was 24. That was only a fling that ended up fizzling out, but still.. it made them happy at the time and they enjoyed each other's company.