Cruise's (Chris) Accountability/Sap Journal :) (comments welcome)

[LAinSEA]

Chris:

Thank you for your kind words in my journal and congrats on 15 down and such a sunny attitude.

Within my program we have done a great deal of studying about ADD/ADHD and how to motivate students with these challenges. (My cousin, my former brother-in-law, and my 7 year old niece all have varying degrees of ADHD also and I've been exposed to different meds and solutions for them all my life).

Moms and daughters have issues with power struggles regardless of the ADHD challenges. Its such a part of growing up. Even at age 41, I still struggle with wanting to be the "little girl" and not take on adult responsibility. The teenage girl just wants to be treated as an adult but isn't quite sure she wants that responsibility either. So my advice is to take DD out shopping or to lunch and have a real low-key talk about your hopes for her are and your expectations, and then ask her what she hopes for and what her expectations are for herself. You can set some short term goals that you will help to remind her about and give her some that she can help remind you about. Take a good 5 minutes to check in at an agreed to time in the evening and chat. The most important thing with ADD/ADHD is not to be overwhelmed with too many things to accomplish and to make them bite size so there is success each day. (Sounds like good advice for the rest of us too, right?) Success builds confidence and more success. Negativity or lack of success makes it harder to succeed. And one more thing, individuals with ADD/ADHD are usually very intelligent...imagine the coping skills you would have to develop in order to just get by. Play to the strength that your DD can probably learn something in half the time it would take her friends without such challenges. Meds or no meds, this is not something she will not grow out of, she will have to learn to use it to her advantage to live with the rest of her life. And I know that it can be done.

To more success!

-Laurie

 

[Mykelogan]

Awww Chris!!! Huge Congratulations and I am soo glad to hear you say you are in this for the long haul!! So proud of you for that!!

Wear your new clippie with Pride!
Have a great night!
Mike

 

[karynnix]

Go Chris!! Go Chris!! Keep it up!!

 

[Cruise04]

8/10/05 #2

Here I sit at 9pm central time and just getting to journals and I'm pooped. Earlier in the week when I said this was hell week for me in my office I was not kidding. I have been going non-stop from the time I get to work to the time I get home and then going at home. Once this week is over, it's okay for a few weeks and then starts right back up with volunteer stuff. I hate August - always have. Oh well.

So when I left work tonight, very fast because I was already late getting out of there by 30 minutes I failed to email myself my food log so I could add my stuff tonight and then do my totals. So I have no totals - I post those tomorrow sometime but I can write my food down. It was a tough day - or I thought it would be but I think I did okay - wish I could do my totals. We went to lunch with all of our new trainees (the secretarial staff) and I had not even thought about what I would eat until this morning. The salad bar is icky so I knew it wasn't going to be that. The main cooked food wasn't that great either. So the choices were a bad sandwich, chicken fingers or taco salad. So I went for the taco salad - put on about 4 ounces of meat, about 2 ounces of beans (if that) and really laid on the lettuce and tomato thick with a small amount of cheese and a couple of olive slices. I really think I did very well. They don't have nutritional information so I just tried to find something similar on calorieking that would be close - oh and I didn't eat the bowl which is the best part - all those carbs deep fried in oil (YUM). I didn't even get the bowl because I knew if I did, I would have eaten it. But I did get some apple slices with a 2 ounce cup of cream cheese/brown sugar dip. But I only ate about 1 ounce, possibly a little less. Just enough to taste on the apple slice. It was good.

So here's what I had:
breakfast - Very Berry Fruit and Oatmeal bar

lunch - taco salad; half an apple sliced; 1 ounce cream cheese dip

snack - 9 carrots, 2 celery sticks, 2 TBSP dip

dinner - ham steak, saffron rice (bad but it was so good and then I went and worked out)

snack - bite sized almond joy when I was taking dd to meet her aunt after we worked out

I think I probably hit close to 1500 cals, probably close to 50 fat grams, and probably close to 250 carbs. We'll see tomorrow how close I think I came. I am going to get on the scale tomorrow because I'm really curious. I was not going to do it but I probably will.

Can't wait for this week to slow down so I can catch up on journals. I hate being behind with you guys and I feel bad. OH OH OH - dd and I are going to measure each other this weekend. Tonight - for the first time since I got my Trailblazer two years ago - I was able to move my steering wheel down a notch and it just barely rubbed my stomach. Ever since I got it I had to have the steering wheel all the way up because it was too tight on my tummy - I knew it hadn't touched it with it being up for a couple of weeks but I was too chicken to lower it any and so tonight I did out of curiosity. I WAS SO EXCITED!!!!!! I know - nothing big to get excited over but for me it is. It means it's really working!!!!! Being 4'10" the lower I can have the steering wheel - the better!!!!!

Thanks for your words and I really hope I can catch up sometime this weekend with you all - I've seen a lot of moving numbers on the 5 for August thread - you all are ROCKIN'!!!!!!

Keep on
Chris

 

[Mykelogan]

Hi Chris!!

Great job with the taco salad!! Avoiding that crispy "bowl" was such a good choice!! Go you!! And huge congrats on being able to adjust the steering wheel like that, you must feel soooooo good!!! I am soo proud of you!!!

Have a great night!
Mike

 

[KimRaye]

Measuring, GREAT! Steering wheel, Very Great!! 15 lbs?!?!?!?!?!?! Fabulously Great!!! Chris, I'm so proud of you!!!! BIG {{HUGS}} roomie!!!

 

[Cruise04]

8/11/05 #1

Thanks guys - well I got on the scale this morning because I knew I wanted to and in my mind had to after not having numbers in front of me last night. I was down another 1.5 pound from yesterday AND to top it off I had miscalculated somewhere wrong - went back and refigured because the weight that I am right now and what I was when I started was 17.5 but I only showed on my August challenge that today would have been 6.5 and that didn't make sense to me when I looked at it after fixing my ticker. I'm really enjoying this much weight loss but I'm starting to get worried that I'm losing too fast. But I don't know. I'm afraid to ask my boss, who is an eating disorder specialist so she would definitely know the numbers and how I'm doing but I think I might have to break down and ask her. Or maybe just ignore it for now and then see after September. I'm sorry if I'm not gloating as much as I know people think I should but I'm actually a very modest person and this has been hard for me to gloat about how I'm doing. But you guys have helped me and I know this is the reason why I'm sticking to this.

I put that steering wheel down again this morning and indeed - it didn't even touch today!!!! (And it shouldn't have - between 9:30 and 12:30 last night I went to the bathroom 4 times!!!!!!! and we aren't just talking dribbles!!!!) It was so good last night to make it through all of the Jazzercise moves that had any bounce in them and not feel like I was going to fall on my butt. When I finish a song now it's like I want to keep going - my energy level has just increased enormously - now if I could just sleep through the night I'd feel even more energy I'm sure!!

Anyway - I told you I would figure my totals this morning from yesterday and I'm incredibly surprised - this is probably why I lost 1.5 pounds. Here they are:
1226 calories, 45.2 fat grams, 195.1 carbs. Pretty good all around for what I had. And that saffron rice has a lot of carbs and calories in it - it's so yummy (it's Mahatma brand - very good).

So today is another day - full of stress because I'm off tomorrow. We have an operating staff thank you lunch today (my classification) so I'm going to eat well - I already know how I'm going to eat because we preorder and they have the same stuff every year - grilled chicken without bun; baked potato with minimal margarine (it's Promise packets); salad with very little ranch dressing; and I'm gonna skip the cookie this year. An old secretary is coming to join us and I'm so looking forward to seeing her. We miss her a lot.

Everyone have a great day - we are cheering because we are suppose to get some pretty steady rain today - possibly up to 2-5 inches in the next few days. We need it SOOOOOOOOO bad. We are around 12 inches under now and in extreme drought conditions - farmers have already lost a lot so this won't help but it will help build those reserves back up.

Keep on
Chris

 

[Lesli54]

Hi, Chris!

I haven't caught up on all of your posts, but I thought I would pop in to see how you are doing. You have been so great about stopping by and encouraging me. I know what you mean about feeling bad about not getting to other journals lately. It happens and you will get caught up, it's just a matter of time.

Isn't the rain great?

Losing 17.5 lbs is great! AND the steering wheel adjustment is exactly one of those little things that keep us going. Way to GO! My step mom is about as tall as you and having the steering wheel lower is very understandable. I wouldn't worry about losing so much so quickly right now. I just looked at the amount that you need to lose and taking into consideration your height, you will probably lose more quickly at first. It would be alot different if you were needing to lose 50 lbs given your height and you were losing so quickly. My guess is that the loss will slow down soon. If it continues longer than you are comfortable with, go ask your dr.

Keep up the great work and have a wonderful day!

 

[lovinaz]

Congrats on the steering wheel! It's those little things that mean so much to us and keep us motivated!

I think you are losing weight rapidly right now because your body is still trying to figure out what the heck you are doing to it! It will eventually taper off and then you will probably be losing 1-2 lbs a week. The biggest thing to remember is that you have to continue this lifestyle change so you don't gain it back! And I think you know that, so you'll do great!

 

[eeyore25]

Hi Chris,

Congrats on the steering wheel!!!!! What a great feeling huh???

Hope you are having a great day!

Keep up the good work, you are doing a great job! How is your DD doing with her weight loss?

 

[karynnix]

I will never forget the day that I was able to cross my legs in church!! Hooray for small victories!!! You are doing great!!

 

[Cruise04]

Today was going good until a phone call for my boss came. She had a mammogram a couple of days ago, he had do a more invasive one yesterday and they called and said they want her to have an ultrasound done because he wants to see more. My mom died almost 3 years ago (on the 19th) and her mom passed way 24 years ago both of them of breast cancer and this is just hitting me pretty hard. Sometimes I just want to strangle her and sometimes I just feel for the crap she has to go through. She's a great person - she has been through a lot with me and done a lot for me. So if you have any extra prayers - please add her to them. I would and I know she would appreciate them.

DD is doing okay - she's gone for a few days but she got on the scale yesterday and she is still losing too - she was at 18 pounds off as of yesterday. She had been ahead of me but I caught up!!!!!

Thanks for asking
Chris

 

[Mykelogan]

Hi Chris!

I am so sorry to hear about your boss. I am definitely sending my prayers to you both. I know it must be easy with the feelings it is raising up in you around your losses too. I wish the smileys were working so I could give you a big hug! Just know that one has been offered!

Mike

 

[Jane E.]

Chris congrats to you and your daughter for the weightloss! Great job. So sorry to hear about your boss. Sending prayers your way!

 

[Cruise04]

8/12/05

Just popping in real quick. My bosses test ended up showing a cyst and now she just has to wait and talk to her doc. So right now things are okay - I was so down last night. This just hit so close to the death of my mom from breast cancer. So I was glad to hear good news.

Today has been okay - haven't eaten much, just didn't have the appetite and had some dental work that now is working on me with some pain. Hopefully it's just she irritated the nerve some. We'll see in a couple of days.

Today I had 2 pieces of toast with 2 teaspoon of low sugar strawberry preserves (the ones from Smuckers and they are good), fat free lemon yogurt (my favorite), and a turkey bagel sandwich with lettuce and tomato and a slice of cheddar cheese on it from our local bagel shop (it was yummy). Going to have pizza tonight and probably no snack as we have to go get groceries.

DD came home from going to her aunt's the last couple of days and help at their towns corn festival. Her aunt did the cake for my father in laws birthday celebration tomorrow and rotten her - sent 4 cupcakes piled with loads of frosting home with her. UGH - so far so good but I want one soooooooo bad. And they ARE delicious. UGH. I may break down and have one tomorrow night when we get home but only if I'm going to workout somehow on Sunday. I'm hoping I can resist them all weekend and not have one but I don't know. I did good today and didn't eat much but I also didn't have much in the way of veggies so maybe that will tempt me to eat carrots instead of cupcakes. I'll let you know tomorrow night if I made it or not!!!

Hope everyone had a good day and has a great weekend. Scale held steady at 17.5 down so I was very happy. Didn't hit my totals by last night, I just was too depressed to eat much so I didn't force it because it would have been bad. Instead I went and worked at our Habitat office for a few hours which kept me away from food. I did eat the leftover pizza loaf. Gosh that is good. I'm gonna have post that recipe this weekend for you guys to have. YUM YUM.

Keep on
Chris

 

[Cruise04]

Final update for tonight. Just wanted to post my totals for today. My food was what I posted up top. I did end up having a half of a cupcake and to me it didn't even taste very good. I will probably have a small, very small, slice of cake tomorrow night as I found out it's white cake. So I will probably have an inside, outside piece (the piece that has frosting on it on the outside but isn't a corner piece, you know) so I can only eat one half of that - either the top or the bottom of the cake as it's a double cake because it's filled. We'll see, depends on what's for dinner. We are packing our own lunch to take with us tomorrow so we can eat what we know we are eating and not being forced to eat something his mom brings that I won't care for and then be starving because I didn't eat.

So with the cupcake my totals - 1258.5 calories, 41.1 fat grams, 179.35 carbs. Not bad for having that half a cupcake if I do say so myself. Could have had probably a little more to eat to have more calories but I think I did okay - I'm a little hungry right now but I'm too tired to eat. So I'm off to bed - night all!!!!

Keep on
Chris

 

[Mykelogan]

Hi Chris,

Glad to hear that your boss got some relatively good news. I am sure that this has not been easy for you so I am very impressed that you have been able to stay on point with your food goals.

Hope that you have fun with the family today!
Mike

 

[Cruise04]

8/13/05

Well, what an interesting day today. I got on the scale this morning and I was down another 1.5 pounds today. So I'm now at 19 pounds off!!!!! I'm just dumbfounded, I truly am. BUT - after eating today, we'll see what it says tomorrow or Monday, depends on how I feel when I get up tomorrow - if I feel icky, I'm not getting on because I'll just set myself up for bad disappointment and if I feel good, then I'll get on and just take what I get.

Today was weird because I felt like I just couldn't get full. It might have had to do with me not really eating much the last couple of days. Or because I ate pretty early this morning. I don't know. But I really tried hard not to eat only what I had planned and I did pretty good - just tried to drink water each time my stomach was telling me it wanted food.

Because we were gone all day and because of what dinner was I didn't write or count anything today - this is my first free day I have allowed myself since starting this. We'll too see how that goes. Here's what I had:

Breakfast - 2 pcs Wonder Light Wheat toast; 2 tsp Low Sugar Strawberry Preserves; fat free lemon yogurt

Snack - 100 Cal Nabisco Snacks - Chips Ahoy

Lunch (we packed our own lunches and ate at the museum - we went to the Discovery Center Science Museum in Rockford and the Burpee Museum in Rockford) - 1 ham sandwich on Wonder Light bread with 1 TBSP fat free mayo, 6 slices of 97% fat free ham, and 2 pickle slices; 10 Baked Ruffles; 1 cheese stick; 18 grapes (1/2 cup); 8 carrots with 1 TBSP dip - this is a typical type lunch for me so I should have been very full - passed up the cupcakes that mother-in-law brought AND the fat free pudding

Dinner - 1/8 cup of mostaccioli (it was pretty gross) so I could try it; 4 ounces of italian beef - no bun; 6 ounces of fried chicken breast meat without skin; 1 cup salad with fat free italian dressing; 1" wide, 4" tall, 2" long piece of cake with frosting but no frosted filling

Snack - half cupcake (other half from last night)

I really think I did pretty well for the temptations that were in front of me today. I resisted eating too much junk that everyone else was eating. I don't know why I ate the other half of that cupcake when we got home because it really didn't agree with me when I got up this morning after digesting it last night.

Tomorrow night I think we are going to have some grilled chicken, try grilling corn, sliced tomato, and new potatoes. We stopped at my favorite vegetable stand on the way from Rockford to Elgin (to in laws house) and got a bag of new potatoes, fresh tomatoes, and fresh sweet corn. YUM YUM!!! I also think I may have been more hungry as a lot of stress lifted from the past couple of days - I always get hungry when the happens. OH OH OH....I put on a tshirt and shorts today that I have not been able to wear for AT LEAST 4 years, perhaps 5!!!!!! I was so excited but I noticed myself being more self-conscious. And MIL didn't notice I had lost weight but had noticed dd who I now have surpassed in the weight loss. But dd has lost it differently than I have too - I still look pregnant!!!!! LOL

Tomorrow is going to be catch up day - sometime so I WILL talk to you all tomorrow!!! Hope everyone had a good day - the day was okay for us. I get tired of mil complaining about the nephews who are really too out of hand and aren't disciplined enough but it's nice when we get to get together and get to see them - which is only about 2-3 times a year.

Keep on
Chris

 

[lovinaz]

You are doing so great Chris, I hope you are giving yourself a big pat on the back. What restraint by only eating 1/2 the cupcake and saving the other half for the next day! And also passing up all the junk that everyone else was eating. I know social situations are the hardest part of eating right.

Keep it up, you really motivate me to stay on track and pick myself up when I stumble (like this weekend!!). Thanks for being such a positive role model for all of us!

 

[Storygirl]

Happy Sunday, Chris! It really sounds like you are doing fantastic!!

I am so impressed with you being able to eat and then save half a cupcake! Cake is my kryptonite, so to speak, so I bow to your restraint...in my house all four would either be in my tummy, or the garbage.

Have a wonderful day!