Christmas gift giving rant!

[TroyE]

Yes, this is truly poor taste. I would not just pay cash, possibly do cash and a present.

I would donate $10 to a charity for less fortunate children and give the girl a lesson in what it means to be in need at Christmas and year round - you may want to give the teacher a heads up that you'll be doing this though.

 

[jamstew]

Personally, I think this year is a good time to start giving less-expensive gifts and giving gifts to far fewer people.

That's what we're doing Our family rule this year is no gifts for adults, and something small for the little ones.

 

[dementia412]

I have only asked please please no more stuffed animals. I've asked this since they my kids were born and we still ended up with tons of them. Stuffed animals have to the most useless toy.
I suggested to a woman I know that she should tell her family she was not going to be giving this year (since she is a poor student with a little kid), and she was shocked. She "has" to give out gifts.
I personally think Christmas is pointless when everything is done just because its expected. I buy stuff for people I love, not just because we have similar DNA, and I haven't bought gifts for adults in many many years. Even my DH and I don't usually get anything from one another.

... but, I am so grateful when my bil sends us cash and gift cards. Too bad he thinks we shop at JC Penny and Sears because it would go much farther if it was for Target or Walmart.

 

[jamstew]

... but, I am so grateful when my bil sends us cash and gift cards. Too bad he thinks we shop at JC Penny and Sears because it would go much farther if it was for Target or Walmart.

Both my DS and my DD think gift cards from Home Depot are the best presents ever!

 

[Vijoge]

Both my DS and my DD think gift cards from Home Depot are the best presents ever!

As does my DH. We're always either redecorating or repairing something!

 

[thomasclan85]

My DH's family is large and until his grandmother passed, we'd all put our names into a box and after eating Thanksgiving dinner, we'd each draw a name. Then a sheet of paper was passed around and you wrote your name and several items that the person who got your name could choose from to get as your gift. There was a limit on how much a person could spend because some family members weren't as financially well off as others. This worked out really good for all of us.

My SIL's and my sister's kids are older now and we just can't afford to buy them the things they want (electronics) so we give them money and they're pleased with that. They can use the money for what they like. I don't really like giving money as a gift but with the cost of what some kids want for Christmas it's an affordable option for us.

 

[Vijoge]

My DDs 5th grade class is doing a secret Santa exchange, with gifts costing no more than $10. The kids were asked to write their names on a slip of paper along with some things that they liked. My daughter told me she wrote down earings, chocolate and LPS. They then drew names. The slip my daughter picked had these 2 suggestions: $10 bill, $10 gift card. My daughter felt dissappointed that she couldn't pick out a gift for this girl. I told her that she absolutely could. Requesting money is tactless and we won't be feeding that idea. I'm now torn between emailing the teacher and having her get some suggestions from this girl, and letting my daughter pick out whatever the heck she wants, since this girl gave us no direction.

I would donate $10 to a charity for less fortunate children and give the girl a lesson in what it means to be in need at Christmas and year round - you may want to give the teacher a heads up that you'll be doing this though.

While I agree that someone probably needs to tell this young lady that many people find asking for money to be offensive I do think donating her "gift" to charity to teach her a lesson is a bit harsh and hardly in keeping with the Spirit of Christmas.

She's just a child and in her family this may be a perfectly normal request. Not everyone has issues with giving money as a gift. Maybe she wanted money so she could put it towards something more costly that she wants. I have no idea really, but to give her nothing but a receipt from a charity seems mean-spirited to me.

 

[averysmom]

Three years ago it had gotten to the point that we were buying just to buy - to even out amounts spent - like I spent 100 on Sally, so I need to get one more thing for Bob, etc.

I was spending all my time up to Christmas shopping, shopping and more shopping - not enjoying the season or spending time with my friends and family - and charity, which had been such an important part of Christmas for me, was put to the wayside.

My side of the family decided to cut what were buying - we now have a strict 50.00 limit per adult and every adult donates 50.00 to a charity that we choose - last year we did half to a battered women's shelter (350) and half (350) to World Vision.

The kids get one Santa gift, and 3 gifts for us. If it was good enough for baby Jesus, it's good enough for them

With the time I spend NOT shopping, we also have more time for friends and family.

 

[jellybeans0607]

This year we are actually cutting people out. Last year I looked at our gift list and decided it had to go. Cousins and aunts and uncles...no more of that. My new list consists of my parents, my kids, my 3 nieces and nephews and one grab gift for husbands family worth $20. Thats it. And next year I hope to convince his family that we should do a grab for nieces and nephews.
I am so sick of having a person on the list just because I know them. Also sorry teachers out there...but no more teachers gifts. I just cant, nor do I want to do it anymore.

What I have done instead is complie a list of people that mean a lot to me and every year I will pick one person on the list and send them a gift. Something totally unexpected and with no expectation of reciprocation. Because THAT to me is the real meaning or xmas...not getting someone a gift just because Inow they are getting me one I don't want to look bad.

 

[*KeepMovingForward*]

P.S. I got an email from a family member say "this Christmas instead of a gift please only give me cash". It offended me.

My response to this would be that it seems silly to trade cash, so let's just not exchange at all. Yes, I would have been offended too.

I didn't read the whole thread, only your post. My impression as a whole is that its rude to tell someone what you want-unless they outright ask you. Even then though, you need to be happy with what you get regardless if it was a requested gift or not.

After 20+ years of giving gifts to everyone under the sun in the family, we all decided to nix it this year. We are just buying for the small kids. Requests were not solicited and thankfully, none were given on the fly. Shopping for everyone, let alone trying to fulfill requests is too much. When I start getting lists from everyone, it takes any joy out of gift giving for me.

 

[Vijoge]

We have trimmed our list down to our three boys, two DIL's, six grandchildren, two women I work with who help me in ways over and above any job description ever written, and our absolutely perfect next door neighbor who watches our dogs, bakes us brownies and cookies, and takes my granddaughters to her house on the occassional weekend for "girly girl time".