Child's sick day frustration

[erincon23]

My DS15 has had an ongoing stomach issue that kept him out of school way too many days last semester, and came back up again (excuse me, poor choice of words) at the beginning of this semester, two weeks ago. He missed four days last week. We've been working with a gastroenterologist, and I was finally able to get him an appointment on Thursday. I sent in his doctor's note when he returned to school today (finally), and got an email from the school saying that this would only make that one day an excused day, instead of noting that we were taking him in for the incident rather than just the day. How does your school handle this? If your kid had a bad cold and missed three days, and you took them to the doctor, would you get an excused for the one day and unexcused for the other two? That's basically what they're telling me. We don't have health insurance at the moment, and there's no way a doctor would see him every day anyway, just to get the note! I'm very frustrated with the school policies right now (not to mention how frustrated I am with my kid over all this, but that's another story...).

 

[mommasita]

Sorry to hear about all the issues. I hope he is feeling much better soon.

I don't understand the "excused" or not
If my child is sick, he is SICK. I write the note. If it is during exams, THEN we need an actual Dr's note.

 

[Magpie]

My DS15 has had an ongoing stomach issue that kept him out of school way too many days last semester, and came back up again (excuse me, poor choice of words) at the beginning of this semester, two weeks ago. He missed four days last week. We've been working with a gastroenterologist, and I was finally able to get him an appointment on Thursday. I sent in his doctor's note when he returned to school today (finally), and got an email from the school saying that this would only make that one day an excused day, instead of noting that we were taking him in for the incident rather than just the day. How does your school handle this? If your kid had a bad cold and missed three days, and you took them to the doctor, would you get an excused for the one day and unexcused for the other two? That's basically what they're telling me. We don't have health insurance at the moment, and there's no way a doctor would see him every day anyway, just to get the note! I'm very frustrated with the school policies right now (not to mention how frustrated I am with my kid over all this, but that's another story...).

I'm sorry you're going through this. You shouldn't have to deal with this headache on top of having a sick kid.

My school district doesn't distinguish between excused or non-excused absences. There's no upper limit, although after a certain point I expect you'll be asked to formally withdraw your child from school and arrange for home education. My son once missed two weeks for illness and all I had to do was call on each Monday and tell them not to expect him for the week. We took a week off school in December to visit Orlando, and it was no big deal.

 

[erincon23]

The district's policy is that if a student provides a doctor's note, it is an "excused" day. For any day they're out that the parent just calls in, that's considered "unexcused." You're only allowed so many unexcused days a semester before the student is considered truant, and doesn't get credit for the semester. We were almost there last semester, but after several meetings and phone calls, they realized we were doing what we could to figure out what was wrong, and listed the days as "other." Yes, I know there are kids that abuse the system, but they know we're not just letting him play hooky. It's all very stressful.

 

[SaraJayne]

The district's policy is that if a student provides a doctor's note, it is an "excused" day. For any day they're out that the parent just calls in, that's considered "unexcused." You're only allowed so many unexcused days a semester before the student is considered truant, and doesn't get credit for the semester. We were almost there last semester, but after several meetings and phone calls, they realized we were doing what we could to figure out what was wrong, and listed the days as "other." Yes, I know there are kids that abuse the system, but they know we're not just letting him play hooky. It's all very stressful.

I'm sorry you're having to deal with red tape BS while your son is sick.

Here, when I call in my child sick or out for the day, it's excused, no doctor's note needed.

 

[HeatherC]

Could you call the doctor and explain the situation? They may be able to fax the school a note with all the dates on it that he is missing.

 

[paysensmom]

hmmm...What is going on with his tummy? My son is having issues as well. He has for the past 8 years complained of tummy aches, VERY often.

 

[lovetoscrap]

The district's policy is that if a student provides a doctor's note, it is an "excused" day. For any day they're out that the parent just calls in, that's considered "unexcused." You're only allowed so many unexcused days a semester before the student is considered truant, and doesn't get credit for the semester. We were almost there last semester, but after several meetings and phone calls, they realized we were doing what we could to figure out what was wrong, and listed the days as "other." Yes, I know there are kids that abuse the system, but they know we're not just letting him play hooky. It's all very stressful.

DD10 has had terrible stomach issues last year and this and the office told me to get a note from her dr to put in her file. The Dr basically just wrote that she is under her care for ongoing issues and to please excuse her from school.

 

[Eeyores Butterfly]

I believe that for my district, we operate the same way. The only days excused are the days of actual appointments. This counts towards truancy, which could result in an officer visit. The reason they do this is that there area decent number of parents who will keep children out excessively long then claim they had a doctor's note. It's a blanket policy to keep families from abusing it.

However, I would arrange a meeting with your child's homeroom teacher and principal. If this is an ongoing issue with medical documentation there is a chance that your child would qualify for a 504 plan.

A 504 plan is similar to an IEP, but for kids with medical issues. The idea is that it will level the playing field and not allow a medical issue to interfere with learning. I have not had to do one myself, so I am not entirely sure how exactly it works, but it is definitely worth looking into. You could discuss things like homebound instruction, make up work policies, etc. If his medical issue is at all affecting his ability to perofrm in school (and it sounds like it is), I would request a meeting and a plan ASAP! I hope this helps!

 

[The Mystery Machine]

My DS15 has had an ongoing stomach issue that kept him out of school way too many days last semester, and came back up again (excuse me, poor choice of words) at the beginning of this semester, two weeks ago. He missed four days last week. We've been working with a gastroenterologist, and I was finally able to get him an appointment on Thursday. I sent in his doctor's note when he returned to school today (finally), and got an email from the school saying that this would only make that one day an excused day, instead of noting that we were taking him in for the incident rather than just the day. How does your school handle this? If your kid had a bad cold and missed three days, and you took them to the doctor, would you get an excused for the one day and unexcused for the other two? That's basically what they're telling me. We don't have health insurance at the moment, and there's no way a doctor would see him every day anyway, just to get the note! I'm very frustrated with the school policies right now (not to mention how frustrated I am with my kid over all this, but that's another story...).

The problem here is that he was not sick with something that keeps him out of school, like a fever.

Can you get the gastro to write the note to include those days he missed school?

 

[DeluxePrincess]

If I call in or write a note for my child, it is considered an Excused absence.

 

[swkmom]

I am a school social worker/truancy officer. I would just ask the doctor to write an excuse for the other two days. Our state laws are very strict on school attendance and only allow 5 unexcused days per year. In our county parents are only allowed to write/call in for their child's absence 5 times per year. In a case where a child may have a chronic illness the parent provides a letter from the child's physician, we then meet as a team and discuss it. After that if the child misses school because of the illness all the parent has to do is call. It is not reasonable to force them to take their child to the doctor every time their is a problem if it is a chronic condition.

 

[katesorad]

My middle brother, who is now 18, has a LOT of stomach problems. Really, the problems made the final decision on him stopping regular high school and starting home schooling when he was 15. His problem turned out to be IBS, and they only were able to figure that out after a number of tests.

Schools really aren't very understanding. They lose a certain amount of $ per child, per day that they're absent. I think that if they handled everything better and made it easier for a child to attend school when they're not feeling well, then they'd have a LOT more kids going to school when they'd otherwise be at home.

I hope everything gets figured out soon, and your son gets a solid solution to the problems he's been having.. and at that point, then he can get back to school. For the time being, I hope that he's able to get the appropriate rest time and is able to make up his school work.

 

[tiggersbombed2]

Have the doctor write in the date to and from, like this:

Excused absence for

1/29/2011 until 2/4/1011.

Or:

From 1/29/2011 patient is expected to return to school 2/4/2011.

That should cover all the days without needing separate note for each day. That's how my dr. does it.

Also, have you tried probiotics? My dd9 was having stomach issues and finally a gastro doctor suggested the probiotics, REALLY made a big difference for her.

Good luck and a hug!

 

[princessmom29]

I think the problem is likely the wording of the note, as a pp mentioned. It needs to give the excused date range to count as doctor's note for moer than one day in our school system. The doc's office should be able to fax something to the school to fix it.

 

[tasha99]

I find it interesting that the schools require a doctor's rather than a parent's note. I think it's up to the parents to disclose as little or as much as they want about their child's health, so I don't know why "please excuse Johnny from x/xx to x/xx" is acceptable if written by a doctor, but not by a parent. Requiring "Please excuse Johnny because xxxx" seems like a HIPAA violation.

At my own school, the student health center has a big sign saying they will not write notes at all. I've seen it as a requirement on syllabuses but have never had to "test the rule." (knock on wood)

 

[LuvOrlando]

Last year we had an issue and all I had to do was call the school, get a list of the dates they have on record then call back the Dr's office and ask the girl to co-ordinate my visits with the sick dates. It worked for me because I never have the kids home without a DR visit. if you have been to the Dr's for all these incidents a little sweetness might save you with the school, good luck & I hope your boy feels better.

They justify the limits with the No Child Left Behind rules but, truth is, I think it's because a kid in school = money. A kid with straight A's won't fail for a few days out and a failing kid won't turn into a straight A student with a few days in either.

 

[golfgal]

We have 10 days of unexcused absences/trimester-vacations, skipping, etc. but for kids that are sick you have to call in to the attendance line in the morning and give the child's name, grade, reason for the absence and a number where they reach you to verify if needed. They don't accept notes from home (high school-easily forged ). If you have an extended illness, they work with you to figure out the way to best handle homework, etc. DD15's best friend has missed most of December and about half of January with mono and complications of mono. With the online access we have, all of her homework is posted online so she just gets her homework assignments from there. If she had problems, especially in Spanish, DD went over and helped.

I have a feeling that if you are frequently "sick" they might request a dr's note but I don't know of anyone that has had issues with that so I am not sure what they do.

 

[erincon23]

Thanks for the comments and concern. He's been back at school yesterday and today (and of course, tomorrow we have a snow day, just what he needed). The dr. says he's showing some symptoms of Crohn's, which scares me to death (my great-aunt's husband and one son died of Crohn's -- and I know there are varying degrees of severity). The dr. says he needs a colonoscopy -- problem is, we don't have health insurance until this coming weekend, and then only for catastrophic stuff. We did start him on antibiotics -- not prescribed by the dr., but we had about a week's worth left from some other things (I know, you're supposed to take the whole prescription) -- I figured it won't hurt him -- in his entire life, he's taken antibiotics maybe three times, so I'm not worried about him becoming resistant -- and it actually seems to have made a difference! The dr's note just said he's undergoing ongoing care for this abdominal issue, and he wouldn't specify dates, since it's really been a day-to-day thing.

Yes, we've tried probiotics. I may try again, but perhaps coincidentally, he felt worse. We've tried prescription acid reducers, a colon spasm medication... I still think there's an anxiety component in all of this, even though we're not seeing the anxiety symptoms that we had seen two years ago in him. I honestly think the best treatment at this point is to be in school every day and see some success. Right now, he feels terrific and happy to be back in school. That's the best I can hope for!

 

[Suellen]

Glad he seems on the uptick (at least he can go to school!)

Our schooll doesn't care WHY you were out. Excused or not they are not separated. If you miss 15 or more days you go before the school board to explain and fight to be moved forward at the end of the year.

So here.... it wouldn't matter excused or not.