Cat Whisperer

momrek06

DIS Veteran
Joined
Dec 23, 2005
Messages
22,732
Is there such a thing. :confused3

My DS and 3 buddies have just moved from different areas around San Diego County into a condo on the beach in La Jolla! It is awesome! They are all professionals and when not working they are surfing.

Well, DS has a 2 yo cat. She really is the sweetest cat. "LG" (Little Girl) was a rescue kitty. DS got her at 2 months old.

So, DS/roomies have been in their new place since May 1st and LG has been a p.i.t.a. since moving in there. She hisses at the roomies all the time. DS ends up putting her in his room allot of the time because even though the roomies have no issue with LG, it bother DS that she is like this with them. DS called to say hi last night and was telling DH and I all of this ... he said it even seems like she growls at them (if that is even possible).

One of the roomies has taken to feed her allot of her meals in hoping that maybe LG will see that heck he is a nice guy, after all he feeds me ... but NOPE, that has not changed anything.

Any suggestions from cat owners as to what DS can do to fix this issue with LG and his roomies? :confused:
 
Time.......
If LG is not being aggressive then I just suggest time. She might continue to growl and hiss but that should taper off as she gets used to the new house and the roomies. They all might actually be trying too hard to earn her affection. I wouldn't lock her up, if the roomies don't object then I would let her acclimate at her own pace.
 
Time.......
If LG is not being aggressive then I just suggest time. She might continue to growl and hiss but that should taper off as she gets used to the new house and the roomies. They all might actually be trying too hard to earn her affection. I wouldn't lock her up, if the roomies don't object then I would let her acclimate at her own pace.

Oh, ok ... give it time, ok. DS actually does not like to have to put her in his room but I guess the other night she was being a real pain and he told her she would need a "time out" :laughing:
She does seem to spend allot of time, when they are all home, under the furniture. When they are gone, she sits in the front window all day long watching everything going on outside. When DS pulls up from work, LG is sitting right there in the window.
As far as he is concerned, it is too funny, she follows him EVERYWHERE. If he is even showering, she will sit outside the door of the bath until DS comes out.

Like I said, LG is a sweetie, but lately not so much. :headache:
 
Oh, ok ... give it time, ok. DS actually does not like to have to put her in his room but I guess the other night she was being a real pain and he told her she would need a "time out" :laughing:
She does seem to spend allot of time, when they are all home, under the furniture. When they are gone, she sits in the front window all day long watching everything going on outside. When DS pulls up from work, LG is sitting right there in the window.
As far as he is concerned, it is too funny, she follows him EVERYWHERE. If he is even showering, she will sit outside the door of the bath until DS comes out.

Like I said, LG is a sweetie, but lately not so much. :headache:

Maybe a bit of catnip would help encourage her out from underneath the furniture when folks are home.
 

Feliway spray works wonders! It has happy cat phermones in it.
I buy mine on amazon as it's cheaper there.
 
Oh, ok ... give it time, ok. DS actually does not like to have to put her in his room but I guess the other night she was being a real pain and he told her she would need a "time out" :laughing:
She does seem to spend allot of time, when they are all home, under the furniture. When they are gone, she sits in the front window all day long watching everything going on outside. When DS pulls up from work, LG is sitting right there in the window.
As far as he is concerned, it is too funny, she follows him EVERYWHERE. If he is even showering, she will sit outside the door of the bath until DS comes out.

Like I said, LG is a sweetie, but lately not so much. :headache:

a good fact to know is that in general cats don't like change. They don't like moving, and having to get used to a new environment. Add to that 2 new people and kitty is pretty much overloaded right now. I agree with the PP, just give her some time. Sometimes it takes cats quite a while to really feel comfortable in a new place(especially with new people around as well). Even my cat who was moved 3 times in 8 years takes a while to get used to each new place...he picks up new weird quirks with each move as well.
If the kitty is hissing and lightly growling it just means she's uncomfortable in the space, if she hasn't attacked anyone yet, I'd stop keeping her locked up so much and just leave her alone in the rest of the house. Eventually she'll get used to the new space and people.
 
That poor kitty is scared, Scared, SCARED!!! :( To her, it would be the same as being dumped in an alley. Even though DS is with her, her surroundings are TOTALLY different.

Does she even have hiding places in the common rooms of the condo? With all the noise & movement by the other 2 roommates, she is alarmed & startled. That's why she's growling.

Was she even properly introduced to the 2 roommates? It is up to DS to show her that these two people are not dangerous to her. Locking her up in his room after she's been growling may not be the way to go. Cat's don't think the same as people. She may think he's doing it to keep her safe from them. :scared1: Or that he's punishing her when she's already scared. This is just going to reinforce her feelings and reactions.

If she gets really out of hand, he can reprimand her. He's the Alpha cat, and she needs to know what is expected of her. But, don't then grab her and lock her up. I got this technique from the Dog Whisperer, when we were visiting my DSis, and my cat started growling at me. Some slight growling when she feels threatened is fine. But, extreme growling & hissing, no.

She needs to be able to come & go freely, hide under couches, inside things and observe. That's why there needs to be places she can hide in, in each room. She has to know she will be able to hide herself when she wants. This will ultimately be what makes her feel safe to come out.

DS also needs to spend time alone with her while she wanders around the parts of the house she's allowed in. No roommates running around. But, he has to leave the TV or stereo on, so she gets used to normal noise, when he's alone with her. As Alpha Cat, he leads by showing her it's safe to come out and look and wander around.

When I'm at my DSis' house, she's got 2 dogs. So I keep Kitty in my room during the day, and once the dogs are put away for the night, she can come out to wander around in peace & quiet. She actually LOVES to explore new places. :love: She's so curious. But, she takes the lead from me, that the place is safe. I'm always soothing her, saying, "You're alright." When she hears noises out the window, even at home, I will say, "It's okay," to let her know the sound IS okay.

We do this too when we are in a new hotel room. I set up her food bowls, and her litter box. So when she is finally let out of her carrier, she knows this is a friendly environment for her. I always stay with her for for about 15 minutes, while she wanders around, (scouting out hiding places,) before getting any more stuff out of the car. I would never dump & leave her, where she'd feel alone and frightened.

On July 4th, we always hear the Macy's fireworks outside. That always alarms her. (Thunderstorms used to bother her, too.) But, I tell her, "It's okay," and she calms down a lot now. If _I_ was jumping up and hiding, she would know there was real danger. :scared1:

As everyone else said, it will take time. But, instead of DS scolding her, he needs to take the lead in letting her know she's safe. :cat:
 
Cats are true conservatives, they dislike all change. Some cats are more insecure than others, just by nature. Kitty likely feels insecure that she has to share your DS with his roomies. Also, cats are very sensitive to smells that humans can't detect--could it be that the previous occupant of the apartment had a cat or a dog? Once the cat has had time to get used to the new apartment, she will figure out how to deal with the new people too. They might not be friends, but they will live peaceably.
 
WOW, thanks everyone for all the posts.

I am going to read them all to DS.

LG knew all the roomies prior to DS actually living with all of them. So they aren't strangers in that sense.

LG is really the house princess. They all love her but the hissing and the growling :headache: has been going on since they moved in together.

Now of course everyone works so they are not together all day long and LG does have the complete run of the condo, which is quite large.

He does have this evening ritual of combing her and playing with her. The combing is what LG loves, so that is why he does that and the playing in the evening is to get her all exhausted so she will sleep at night when he is sleeping. LG tends to sleep somewhere on his bed.

The funny thing with LG is despite the fact DH & I live an hour away, every time I see LG she just loves me. She comes right over to me and wants me to hold her ... funny she is not the same with the roomies. I actually am like her "grandmother" as I always bring a new toy with me.

Oh and DS does give her treats often, you know catnip! My MIL actually grows real catnip in her garden in CT and then buys small stuffed animals at yard sales and takes the stuffed animal apart and then puts the homegrown catnip in; stitches it up and mails them to DS! LG loves them!

Oh, LG does NOT go outside. DS does not ever want her out. She only goes out to the Spa ... yup, she goes for baths, nails clipped and hygiene cuts every 6 months. In April, DS dropped her off at the Kitty Spa and when he picked her up the Tech said "LG had an attitude today, she was hissing at me"... ugh. :headache:

From all your responses, LG needs time to get settled into the new digs and living with the new roomies.
 
Oh, I misunderstood. I thought she was pretty much used to being alone with DS and suddenly, it's like an invasion for her. But, it sounds like she is pretty socialized.

If she understands the word NO and usually obeys it. (As much as cats obey. ;)) Have the roommates try reprimanding her when she growls & hisses at them. Not loudly to scare her into hiding, but to let her know that behavior is not tolerable. It's again about letting her know who are the Alpha bosses. She may have picked it up as a bad habit now and just does it automatically without realizing it. If she actually stops the hissing, then it was the right thing to do.

If she just runs and hides, then it's really more about her being so scared, and she really needs more time. :goodvibes

It's kind of like the difference in when you brought your DS to the store when he was little, and he was getting cranky and hungry and acting up a little. But, he understood an uncalled for meltdown and bad behavior was not to be tolerated. The cat legitimately being scared and hissing is one thing. Being snarky is another.
 
Does this cat like treats? Soft Food? Regular Food? Try having the offensive people feed him treats. They can lure him out of hiding by creating a line of goodies and slowly the cat will associate them as being okay. But, yes there are cat whisperers. We hired one named Olga - I think she is out of Minnesota and her advice seemed to work. I can't remember her last name but she is online.
 
This may sound crazy....but in the veterinary practice where I work (feline only BTW), we recommend cats that leave our hospital from surgery/boarding, etc, get wiped down with a dishtowel and then wipe the other cats with the same towel so the left at home cats don't think he/she is an intruder cat. They react strongly to smells and when a cat comes home from a strange place they will be hissed at, etc. Your cat may be reacting to all the new smells. So, if everyone smells the same, it could help alot. Feliway is good too for stress, but I'd also recommend the towel trick. Wipe the humans and then the cat that is afraid. Do it a few times a day for a few days. Good luck!
 
Hi! I will agree with PPers that she just needs more time to adjust. I have read several times that it is actually more traumatic to a cat to move to a new home than it is to change owners. So this move and the new surroundings has been a traumatic event.

I also want to give a second thumbs up to the Feliway spray. Our vet recommended it to us. It has pheromones in it that help cats feel more relaxed and at ease.

Is she hissing after being approached or when someone is trying to draw her out? Or is she just randomly walking up to people and hissing? It would be odd for her to be provoking negative contact like that. I wonder if the roommates could just kind of "ignore" her as much as possible. In other words, if they pass each other in the hallway, the roommate would not really try to pet her or talk to her a whole lot... just keep walking. She might feel a little more secure if she doesn't feel like she's being engaged all the time.

Is her food and litter pan really far away from your DS's bedroom? You certainly don't want to put them really close to each other (because, really, who wants to eat next to the toilet... and cats noses are much more sensitive than ours) but if she has to brave the entire length of the house just to eat or go to the bathroom I would think that would upset her during this time when she's still getting used to things. It would be better if she has a "home base" area that she can stay in and get comfortable in, and then she can expand her "realm of safety" at her own pace and completely voluntarily.

Good luck... she sounds like a sweet little thing and hopefully with enough time she'll be back to her old self!
 

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