Calling someone "Dr." outside of medical setting

[CPT Tripss]

I prefer using first names rather than honorifics in informal social settings. But if I do use an honorific, I will use the correct one and not substitute Mr or Ms incorrectly.

 

[A_Princess'_Daddy]

Ph.D. stands for Doctor of Philosophy. While in your circle it's may not be common to call someone with a Ph.D. "Doctor," it is absolutely correct and certainly not a "regional thing." I can guarantee that there are many people in Sacramento who use the term.

FTR, no, I don't have a Ph.D.

It actually depends. In terms of etiquette, traditionally people with PhDs who work in academia use Dr. as an honorific, but traditionally those with PhDs who work in industry do not use Dr. as an honorific. In a medical setting, to avoid confusion with medical doctors, it is considered inappropriate to refer to a PhD as Dr. in the clinical setting, which doesn't mean some PhDs don't insist on it, but it's not considered appropriate as far as I have been trained.

I do have a PhD (in a soft science) and have never been called Dr. in my life (actually, I have a few times in new settings that were formal and I was unknown, but I have always immediately insisted on being called either by my first name or as Mr.) nor would I ever allow anybody to refer to me as Dr. more than once.

Several of our neighbors, friends and colleagues are medical doctors, and to my wife and me they are "John," "Dave," etc. but to our children they are all "Dr. Lastname." I work with and am friends with several other PhDs and to our children they are all Mr. and Ms. Last Name, not Dr. Last Name.

 

[Lexiesmom]

I think it really does depend.
I work in a University in a research setting.
For the most part we call the principal investigators by Dr. ___ . There are a handful that I feel comfortable enough to call them by their first name. However if I'm ever talking in a professional setting about them, I call them by Dr. ___.
But they have lots of people who work for them, all with varying degrees, some with Ph'd's. We tend to refer to them by their first name since we are normally the ones teaching them things and work more closely with them on a more informal basis.


So basically, with us, if you're the boss, you get the Dr title, if not, first names unless you tell us otherwise.

 

[Luv Bunnies]

I worked with a pre-school teacher who got her PhD about three years after I started working with her. The degree had absolutely nothing to do with teaching or any aspect of special ed. It was more of a hobby subject for her. She was already into her 60s and didn't intend to ever work in the field. She just wanted to study the subject further and get the degree.

As soon as her degree was conferred, she insisted everyone at the school call her Dr. Firstname. Our preschool kids and their parents were used to calling us Miss Firstname. It was confusing to the (special needs) kids because the only kind of doctor they know looks down your throat and gives you a shot. Introducing the concept of "doctor" at their school didn't seem like the right thing to do. When she introduced herself to new parents as "Dr." they would say things like, "Oh! You have a PhD. You must be very qualified to teach my child." She was qualified. She had the proper teaching credential and lots of experience. But the PhD didn't enhance her ability to teach the class. Now if she'd said, "Yes, I have a PhD in Film" it might have been better.

I was never jealous of this woman's education. She worked hard for the degree. She wanted it and she made it happen. However, insisting people use the title at her job bordered on pretentious. Especially when someone would call her Miss Firstname and she'd interrupt them and say, "It's DR. Firstname." Seriously? What's the point?

 

[PalVal]

After my ex husband received his doctorate in education, he couldn't wait to receive his return address stickers with "Dr" that he order to come in the mail. They apparently didn't come in time for my child support mailing, so he crossed off the "mr" next to his name and wrote "Dr" over it! Hysterical! I got the point when I received my child support envelope, he was much smarter than me!

 

[Dan Murphy]

I generally call a doctor by first name, in or out of medical setting.

 

[mom2rtk]

After my ex husband received his doctorate in education, he couldn't wait to receive his return address stickers with "Dr" that he order to come in the mail. They apparently didn't come in time for my child support mailing, so he crossed off the "mr" next to his name and wrote "Dr" over it! Hysterical! I got the point when I received my child support envelope, he was much smarter than me!

Surely that meant he could afford to send more money for the kids, right?

 

[wgeo]

Personally I will call someone whatever I think they want to be called. It's not quite the same, but my kids principal and I are good friends and I always refer to her by her first name unless I am speaking to the kids or we are actually at school and then I always say Principal ___.

We are going through this right now with my DH. He is a pastor and has his doctorate and never goes by Dr or Rev. Dr. unless it is something official on letterhead. He prefers Pastor Firstname. Well he's going to a new church that has always called their pastors "Dr. Firstname" and he's trying to convince them that he's more comfortable with Pastor, and that he doesn't feel any disrespect if they don't use the Dr title. But really he'll answer to anything and it doesn't make that much difference how people choose to address them in his opinion.

 

[okeydokey]

I was never jealous of this woman's education. She worked hard for the degree. She wanted it and she made it happen. However, insisting people use the title at her job bordered on pretentious. Especially when someone would call her Miss Firstname and she'd interrupt them and say, "It's DR. Firstname." Seriously? What's the point?

The point Is that she earned the title and preferred people use it. If I was told that someone prefers to be addressed a certain way then I would address them that way and not think anything of it.

If someone asks to be called Katherine, I wouldn't call them Kathy either. Their name, their choice.

 

[Ceila]

It actually depends. In terms of etiquette, traditionally people with PhDs who work in academia use Dr. as an honorific, but traditionally those with PhDs who work in industry do not use Dr. as an honorific. In a medical setting, to avoid confusion with medical doctors, it is considered inappropriate to refer to a PhD as Dr. in the clinical setting, which doesn't mean some PhDs don't insist on it, but it's not considered appropriate as far as I have been trained.

I do have a PhD (in a soft science) and have never been called Dr. in my life (actually, I have a few times in new settings that were formal and I was unknown, but I have always immediately insisted on being called either by my first name or as Mr.) nor would I ever allow anybody to refer to me as Dr. more than once.

Several of our neighbors, friends and colleagues are medical doctors, and to my wife and me they are "John," "Dave," etc. but to our children they are all "Dr. Lastname." I work with and am friends with several other PhDs and to our children they are all Mr. and Ms. Last Name, not Dr. Last Name.

Actually, I have worked with individuals in a variety of industries as an executive recruiter, and you are incorrect in stating that Ph.D. recipients outside of academia do not use the title Doctor. Many individuals, representing a variety of fields, do in fact use it.

It all comes down to the personal preference of the individual who has earned the title. Some will use Doctor, some won't. Some will use it only in a professional setting, others will use it socially as well. But, for someone else to determine whether they should use it (as others on this thread claim to do) is presumptuous and rude. Likewise, correcting someone can be done graciously or rudely as well.

 

[sasywtch]

It actually depends. In terms of etiquette, traditionally people with PhDs who work in academia use Dr. as an honorific, but traditionally those with PhDs who work in industry do not use Dr. as an honorific. In a medical setting, to avoid confusion with medical doctors, it is considered inappropriate to refer to a PhD as Dr. in the clinical setting, which doesn't mean some PhDs don't insist on it, but it's not considered appropriate as far as I have been trained.

I do have a PhD (in a soft science) and have never been called Dr. in my life (actually, I have a few times in new settings that were formal and I was unknown, but I have always immediately insisted on being called either by my first name or as Mr.) nor would I ever allow anybody to refer to me as Dr. more than once.

Several of our neighbors, friends and colleagues are medical doctors, and to my wife and me they are "John," "Dave," etc. but to our children they are all "Dr. Lastname." I work with and am friends with several other PhDs and to our children they are all Mr. and Ms. Last Name, not Dr. Last Name.

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I work with nurses and one just obtained her PhD. She demanded we call her doctor. None of us would. She didn't stay long.
To the previous poster(s), no I am not a loser, jealous or any other remark made because I don't call anyone other than medical doctors, doctor. I am from the mind that doctors are medical personnel and not someone who earned at PhD. My own doctor prefers to be called by his name however, I can't find myself to do that. He is a DO and likes to be "in touch" with his patients.

It is what it is.

 

[Gumbo4x4]

The point Is that she earned the title and preferred people use it. If I was told that someone prefers to be addressed a certain way then I would address them that way and not think anything of it.

If someone asks to be called Katherine, I wouldn't call them Kathy either. Their name, their choice.

No, she earned the degree. The title exists within the realm of its use. I have a title at work that took 20+ years to earn. I don't ask people outside of work to recognize it because quite frankly, that would be ridiculous.

 

[luvsJack]

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I work with nurses and one just obtained her PhD. She demanded we call her doctor. None of us would. She didn't stay long.
To the previous poster(s), no I am not a loser, jealous or any other remark made because I don't call anyone other than medical doctors, doctor. I am from the mind that doctors are medical personnel and not someone who earned at PhD. My own doctor prefers to be called by his name however, I can't find myself to do that. He is a DO and likes to be "in touch" with his patients.

It is what it is.

I am guessing you mean that in terms of the nurses with a PhD? Because, working in education, I work with several PhDs and they have most definitely earned the title of "Dr". one of the nursing instructors just got her PhD. Her students will refer to her as "Dr", the rest of us by her first name just like now.

We have several. Some teach, some in administration. None really insist on being called "Dr" but I do correct students that ask to speak to "Mr xxxx" when referring to my boss. The instructors, some I call by their first names and some by Dr xxxx but I would never refer to any of them as Mr. or Mrs.

With my boss and the college president; it will always be Dr. no matter what the situation.

 

[scrapquitler]

Unless I was invited to be on a first name basis, I'd keep the formalities.

I wouldn't even consider calling someone who is a Doctor by Mr. Smith. It's just not the way I was brought up. No different than my Dad's close friend, who was a minister. We would never in a million years call him by anything but "Pastor Andy".

Back when I was an exchange student, one of my host families was very involved in that country's military (air force, actually) and the grandfather was a Coronel, and everyone in the family ALWAYS called him by his title. It was like he didn't even have a name. But it was a sign of respect. I don't think the kids ever even called him Grandpa.

 

[sasywtch]

Ph.D. stands for Doctor of Philosophy. While in your circle it's may not be common to call someone with a Ph.D. "Doctor," it is absolutely correct and certainly not a "regional thing." I can guarantee that there are many people in Sacramento who use the term.

FTR, no, I don't have a Ph.D.

Thank you for pointing out what the PhD stands for, I would have never known LOL (which is why I said, medical doctors)
I'm a popular girl but my circle does not encompass the entire Sacramento area. I'm positive people in Sacramento do use the term doctors to PhD holders. You are right there.

What's funny is, over my years I have been in social situations with medical doctors and if someone called them by their name, they never corrected them to doctor but yet, I have been in many situations where someone was in a social situation who had a PhD and demanded they be called doctor. Wonder why that is?

 

[sasywtch]

I am guessing you mean that in terms of the nurses with a PhD? Because, working in education, I work with several PhDs and they have most definitely earned the title of "Dr". one of the nursing instructors just got her PhD. Her students will refer to her as "Dr", the rest of us by her first name just like now.

We have several. Some teach, some in administration. None really insist on being called "Dr" but I do correct students that ask to speak to "Mr xxxx" when referring to my boss. The instructors, some I call by their first names and some by Dr xxxx but I would never refer to any of them as Mr. or Mrs.

With my boss and the college president; it will always be Dr. no matter what the situation.

Yes, she is an RN working for the state. (or did work for the state). We are a relaxed office where everyone is called by their first name including the executive officer placed there by the governor's appointed Board members so having one person demand to be called doctor was a little out of place. (my executive officer has a PhD in nursing and one in law JD). She has us call her by her first name.

 

[sasywtch]

The point Is that she earned the title and preferred people use it. If I was told that someone prefers to be addressed a certain way then I would address them that way and not think anything of it.

If someone asks to be called Katherine, I wouldn't call them Kathy either. Their name, their choice.

Honestly, if I'm in a social situation (not work related) and someone wanted to be called doctor, I'd just avoid that person. I can't imagine my son going to a party and someone saying hello to Joe (not his real name) and him correcting them and saying, I'm doctor Smith. THAT sounds snobbish to me and that you define yourself by your degree. Now if he's at a school function where it's appropriate, that's something else entirely as he does have his PhD in education and he's an elementary school teacher looking for a principal position.

Completely different than someone saying my name is Joseph, not Joe. That is a preference of not using a nickname whereas not calling someone doctor is to them, not recognizing a degree that they obtained.

 

[okeydokey]

Academic degrees are earned, not obtained. I have worked in a variety of academic settings. To not address someone by their title, especially when they ask you too is rude.

 

[Disney Doll]

I've never understood the need to address people based on what they do for a living outside of the professional situation.

That being said, if someone is insistent on it I'm not going to argue with them. I'll just think they're either a snob or very insecure since they need to insist on the title to prove self worth.

 

[PizzieDuster]

Omg, at my place of employment once, a medical doctor came in for our services, not in his professional capacity, but personal.

One of our employees came out to greet him, and I don't know if she just didn't know he was a doctor or figured since this was personal in nature, he would prefer it to be casual....either way, she came out, nice as can be. "James, I'm Penny and..."

Oh my gosh. It went nuclear. He looked and sounded like he was foaming at the mouth. He addressed the receptionist, but also Penny at the same time. He said something to the effect of, "Would you PLEASE make it known in your files that I am to be addressed as DOCTOR Smith? I went to school for X number of years to earn that title, and should be treated with respect..."


We were all stunned. So, in our computer software, we actually had to change his first name to "Doctor" to make sure any of his documentation/correspondence would be to his exact specifications.

Yikes.

We went to a wedding yesterday (Saturday). Sat at the table. When one of the men found out my husband was an attorney ~ it didn't go well. Bad divorce for him I guess but I was Really? Isn't this a beautiful wedding..... He didn't do your divorce!