Bridal Showers?

[Pomlover2586]

Ok so i'm not going to be able to do a conventional bridal shower because my MOH is 12! Therefore my mom is talking with her friend about planning one between the two of them. Normally this wouldn't bother a bride......but normal brides don't have my mom.... She is notorious for procrastination [she was still wrapping christmas presents 20 minutes before we opened them!] She also has a tendency to be innappropriate while trying to be "cool" [Such as things she says etc] I'm really worried about her throwing a poorly planned party......not to mention tacky. I'd feel much more comfortable if my FMIL was the one doing this........but I don't know if its appropriate to ask her to get involved......

Anyway while we're on this subject along with your advice i'd love to hear about the showers your going to have/had!

 

[Ember]

Unfortunately, a shower is held for the bride, not by her, and you really don't get a say in how it's done. If you want to be sticky on etiquette you could try approaching your mum and telling her that traditionally the brides mother isn't the one who should host a shower because she is basically asking for gifts for her child which can seem self serving. Strict etiquette would say that having your FMIL as the "host" while your mum plans with her would be more polite.

Now, personally, I think this is getting pretty close to being a load of .... I figure as long as it isn't the bride hosting her own shower in a blatant attempt to get gifts (and I've known one or two, trust me, they weren't interested in the company!) anyone who wishes can host a shower and the bride can either accept graciously or decline.

Your other option is to ask your FMIL to approach you mum and inquire about helping her. You never know, your mum might be grateful for the help.

Either way, I wouldn't worry too much about it. In the long run it won't matter that much and regardless of how embarrassing your think your mum is, I bet other people think she's fun!

I hope it works out for you!

 

[JandJ]

Edited because I don't know who of my friends might read this . . .

I had a similar problem. My MOH was my niece and she was 17, a high school student, and couldn't exactly throw a shower. My mom passed away and MIL lived far away, so 3 of my friends threw my shower. When I have a baby and someone wants to throw me a baby shower I'm going to do it myself. I know my friends meant well, they even asked for my input but it was not by any stretch of the imagination the shower I dreamed of having. I've never told my friends because I don't want to hurt their feelings.

I say get your FMIL involved and get yourself involved. Don't be disappointed. It stinks to regret any part of your wedding and your shower is a big part of it. Good luck!!

 

[figmentfan814]

My aunt is hosting one of my showers in a couple of weeks and I offered some input on things. I don't think it hurts to help get other people involved to help out your mom. My matron of honor and bridesmaid are hosting another shower and I have helped them with decorations and other preparations too.