Boys in the Women's Bathroom

[tinkerpea]

I think the OP was reffering to muslim dress standards. It is not about seeing a boy or man, but being seen by one. I have seen women remove their hajib in the women's restroom many times to fix hair that has slipped down, ect. The expectation is that there are only women or very young boys in a women's restroom so it does not violate the dictates of thier religion to reomve them. A 10 year old boy, who is aware of the differences between male and female, is considered a non family male and it is inappropiate for them to see a girl or woman past puberty who is not an immediate family member with her head uncovered. I had never thought of this but now that it has been brought up I can see the problem.

Thank you this is exactly what I was trying to point out,
It could be a real problem for these women and their female children, and as much as mums want to keep their children safe ( which as a mother I understand) these women also have the right to not be ashamed of being seen by a male boy of 10 and this thread is proving that mums are taking there 10 and older child into the ladies with no thought to how it can effect others

 

[tinkerpea]

I can't remember at what age I started sending my son alone but I'm sorry no matter what his age, if I feel it would be unsafe to let him go alone or for him to wait outside alone while I go then I'm taking him. My child's safety is way more important the. Someone feeling uncomfortable.

And this is the problem, your child and you are more important then another.
Safety is 1 thing being over protective is another" not trying to be funny"
A women's Muslim religion is very important when it comes to what is seen by another male, do you not feel that this women has a right to be able to use the ladies room without it violating her religion?

The after effects of this could be very serious if the husband found out. You may feel this is not your problem but you do have to consider this when taking in a child who is perfectly capable of sorting their own needs or waiting outside for you!

We are not talking truck stops here we are talking DISNEY.

 

[tinkerpea]

And that is the crux of the situation, where do one person's right end and another's begin? How much "concern for saftey" is founded and how much is paranoia that infrenges on the rights of others? These are not easy questions, and the answer is not always "my point of view is right" or "my kid first". Some would argue that you are being needlessly paranoid to the point of infringing on someone else's right to privacy and safety, and yes, some Muslim women are no longer safe if they allow themselves to be seen uncovered. Not saying that they are right, but there is a counter argument there to be considered and it is certianly not a cut and dried issue where the rights of moms of boys always take priority.

And this is why I felt the need to bring it up, I've read many of these threads now and have never seen this issue brought up,
I don't think many realise how serious it would be for the female, the lady's is the one place that these women do freshen up and face arms can be seen depending on what religion they follow, whilst simply washing their hands etc a male could see something they should not, im not saying its right i just feel that this should be considered.

 

[Southern Bell]

I don't pay any attention to a 5-7 yr old boy being in the bathroom. I have seen mothers have a little older 7-8 yr olds stand to the side of the entrance of the bathroom & not in front of the stalls when waiting on the mom. One thing about the womens bathroom is that it is private so I don't really think its that much of an issue. But mens is a different story! My husband has taken our daughter when she was younger and he just waited at the outside womens bathroom for her. He refused to take her in the mens. I don't know what he did! I guess he didn't go! LOL! I think they need to be at least school age before you start letting them go by themselves and ten seems a little old.
As far as worrying about Disney being a place for predators! You bet! I don't want to worry to the point that I scare my children to venture out of the house, or they can't use a public bathroom. But just because it is Disney doesn't mean everyone there is good and family oriented.
As far as religion and if I felt very strongly about removing any garment from myself , with the possibility of a ten yr old boy seeing me, I would not risk it in a PUBLIC bathroom, especially at Disney World. Maybe in the privacy of the stall. I feel like it would be my resposibility to keep myself hidden and not of another person who didn't even understand my religion. If I had to change clothes in a PUBLIC bathroom I'd do it in the privacy of a stall. I wouldn't stand outside in the bathroom area and do it because it is not private. Its PUBLIC! You don't know whos coming in! It could be anybody! LOL!

 

[kevschickee]

Yes it's PUBLIC but it's a PUBLIC ladies room not a unisex bathroom.

 

[Nancyg56]

Not in WDW where they stated the age was 10.


I mean really what is mom to do, she has several kids, she is by herself, is she somehow suppose to take ALL the kiddos into the stall And heaven forbid she uses the bigger handicapp stall, she will get grief from certain people for that.

I am all for taking them into the stall if that is feasible but some of you have to realize that idea is not always going to work.

If there is a companion bathroom then that is the answer. I really have a problem understanding why some of these women are afraid to let their 9 and 10 year old sons out of their sight. I agree with the folks who think that if someone feels so strongly about having their older boys enter teh ladies room, those boys can enter the stall with their mom. I know that there are always extenuating circumstances, and I am not talking about those times. But really, if someone just afraid then that is not my problem. I have every right to some privacy if I m using a ladies, room.

 

[pocomom]

Whenever we are out and about and my son has to use the bathroom, he insists on using the men's room. He's only 4 1/2 but has always been the independent type. If DH is with me, I make him go in there to make sure he's okay and can reach the sink and soap.

my dd's sometimes couldn't reach the toliet by themselves at that age...much less the sinks

Although I do have a fear of my kids using the restrooms by themselves as I was at a fair once when a boy was molested with his mom standing outside the door, I do know that they are much more likely to have to deal with someone they know trying to hurt them, and we try to teach them how to protect themselves as best they can.
My more rational concerns with a really little guy is the condition of the public bathrooms- Disney is normally ok but some other places are just foul! Have you guys every used a waterpark restroom? We actually had to leave a park once because there was no reasonable way to use the bathroom. And frequently the sink, soap, paper towels/hand dryer and even toliet paper are out of reach of younger kids. Sometime between 6-8 most kids can deal with these situations fine. Earlier I can imagine many just not wiping if there is no paper, not washing hands if they can't reach the sink, or having an accident if they can't reach the toliet or it is just too filthy to use.
When dd's were 2 and 3 we actually kept a little potty in the back of the minivan for just these reasons, and if my ds 3, ever gives up his diapers we'll probably do it again!

 

[Mkrop]

So age 10 is posted in Disney as an acceptable age?

According to other posters on this board who have emailed WDW on this topic. I personally have not emailed WDW.

If there is a companion bathroom then that is the answer. I really have a problem understanding why some of these women are afraid to let their 9 and 10 year old sons out of their sight. I agree with the folks who think that if someone feels so strongly about having their older boys enter teh ladies room, those boys can enter the stall with their mom. I know that there are always extenuating circumstances, and I am not talking about those times. But really, if someone just afraid then that is not my problem. I have every right to some privacy if I m using a ladies, room.

I also think that is agreat alternative IF that is available where you are, not just WDW. But you also know there are tons of threads of people saying that is NOT what the companion bathrooms are for, and give grief to the moms who use them for that purpose. So you are darned no matter what.

DS10 does goe by himself and 99% of the time older DS or DH is there, but he is a big 10 and he also is VERY anxious, getting help for it, so these answers are not always cut and dry for me. I seek out the best method for all involved. I can take him in the stall if I needed to, bc it is just him and me that I am dealing with. Or companion bathroom would be my first choice.

But if an area is not safe (not talking WDW), and DS is having an anxiety attack, he is coming in the bathroom with me.


Also in regards to the Muslim dress, I will say until 9/11 I had no idea the different tenets of the Muslim faith and still dont claim to know all or if any other faith has these issues, I have to balance respecting these faiths but also keep my child safe. There are adult disabled men who are brought into restrooms all the time bc there is no companion restroom and their caregivers have no choice. I dont know if was here or on the other thread, where the Cape May Cafe was brought up. An older mom brought in a male about 30, brought him into the stall and helped him. She got grief from other woman. How would a woman of a consevative faith handle that situation?

 

[Glennie5]

I wonder if a 10 yr old boy would feel comfortable being in there. I know my 11 and 9 yr old DD's would be uncomfortable with them being in there at the same time.

 

[EKW]

I haven't read any of the replies in this thread...haven't read any replies to this question in YEARS. Here's the right answer to your question: He's your kid. He's your responsiblity. Nobody...nobody can answer this question for you. If you aren't comfortable having him go in the men's room alone, take him in with you. You do not need to worry about anyone else...let them solve their own problems and deal with their own issues. Do what is best for your child. End of story!

 

[Southern Bell]

Yes it's PUBLIC but it's a PUBLIC ladies room not a unisex bathroom.

LOL! You are exactly right! Well I hope its not unisex but sometimes I wonder about that, too. Alot more than I do than if a boy is 8 or 10. LOL! But... I was just trying to make a point that if it was real important to me not to have a 10 yr old boy see my head uncovered that I personally wouldn't count on a Womens public bathroom. No matter if its our right to expect the privacy, there are little and bigger boys coming in and out of the womens bathroom! Some may be 10. I don't know I haven't ever asked! But.. I have seen men cleaning the bathroom coming in before they really should have. I've seen the door wide open from people in line or no door! LOL! So... no I'm not going to change clothes nor would I take off my head piece, except to hide in the stalls! LOL!
Men would probably never have this conversation! I don't guess men worry about it and could care less! LOL!

 

[Donald Duck888]

Ok now I would like to turn this subject on its head. What are peoples opinions of say a 6 yr old girl coming in to the mens room?

I am taking my 6yr old daughter to disney solo this may and have been giving this much thought. First choice would be to use "family/companion restrooms but short of that there are only 2 options.

I would have reservations about sending her into the ladies room alone but would possibly in a pinch go that route provided one exit and i would still be a bit nervous. But what of when I have to go? I really do not want to leave her standing around alone outside the bathroom that really makes me nervous. In that case I have no choice (if option 1 is not viable) then to take her into mens room with me.

 

[iheartdisney]

Men would probably never have this conversation! I don't guess men worry about it and could care less! LOL!

That is probably because most men would never consider taking their ten year old daughter into the men's room! lol. Men seem to be a little more reasonable. I don't know why so many women seem to think there is a giant orgy going on in the Men's room, people swinging from the ceilings, tallywackers hanging everywhere. It is a bathroom. Men are using the facilities and getting back to their day.

Disney bathrooms in particular- I'm pretty sure the facilities are busy enough that a person with bad intentions would not have to means to commit a crime. You'd have to be pretty ballsy to try and rape a kid in a crowded WDW bathroom.

Imagine how uncomfortable it would be for a tween girl to have to walk past a boy almost her same age to buy a tampon from the machine. Or to change into a dry shirt after getting off Kali or Splash.
Heck, I'm an adult and it is hard to drop a deuce in a public restroom when you really need to. Now try to remember how hard it was when you were a young adolescent, and try to imagine there is a boy standing outside the stall.

 

[Donald Duck888]

That is probably because most men would never consider taking their ten year old daughter into the men's room! lol. Men seem to be a little more reasonable. .

Not at 10 no. But at 6? I will before I will leave her standing around alone outside the bathroom.

 

[Donald Duck888]

I don't know why so many women seem to think there is a giant orgy going on in the Men's room, people swinging from the ceilings, tallywackers hanging everywhere. It is a bathroom. Men are using the facilities and getting back to their day.

.

I have to say this comment made me laugh lol

 

[iheartdisney]

Ok now I would like to turn this subject on its head. What are peoples opinions of say a 6 yr old girl coming in to the mens room?

I am taking my 6yr old daughter to disney solo this may and have been giving this much thought. First choice would be to use "family/companion restrooms but short of that there are only 2 options.

I would have reservations about sending her into the ladies room alone but would possibly in a pinch go that route provided one exit and i would still be a bit nervous. But what of when I have to go? I really do not want to leave her standing around alone outside the bathroom that really makes me nervous. In that case I have no choice (if option 1 is not viable) then to take her into mens room with me.

I mentioned a few pages back that my DS was 5.5 or 6 when he decided he was no longer going into the women's room. Most bathrooms have water fountains and benches outside, I would sit him on the bench and have him wait for us there. depends on how mature the child is though. Or most of the bathrooms are constructed that when you enter the door, there is a wall there, and you go either left or right, I'd him wait by the wall. So technically he was in the restroom, but not "in" the restroom.

 

[kevschickee]

I have a 7 & 5 year old and no I would not take them into the mens room. Are you bringing her into the stall with you? What about the men at the urinal? Won't it be embarrassing for them?

 

[Donald Duck888]

So you would leave your 5yr old all alone outside the bathroom while you went in? I am not saying right wrong or indifferent on that choice but for me at least it would make me nervous.

 

[Donald Duck888]

What about the men at the urinal? Won't it be embarrassing for them?

I guess i could have her wear a blindfold.

 

[kevschickee]

So you would leave your 5yr old all alone outside the bathroom while you went in? I am not saying right wrong or indifferent on that choice but for me at least it would make me nervous.

Before my husband brought her into the mens room he would prob leave her at the bathroom entrance or find a companion bathroom. I don't want my daughter walking past a man at the urinal. It would be embarrassing for her and him.