Boys in the Women's Bathroom

[kevschickee]

I think the OP was reffering to muslim dress standards. It is not about seeing a boy or man, but being seen by one. I have seen women remove their hajib in the women's restroom many times to fix hair that has slipped down, ect. The expectation is that there are only women or very young boys in a women's restroom so it does not violate the dictates of thier religion to reomve them. A 10 year old boy, who is aware of the differences between male and female, is considered a non family male and it is inappropiate for them to see a girl or woman past puberty who is not an immediate family member with her head uncovered. I had never thought of this but now that it has been brought up I can see the problem.

That's what I took it as too. We have to be mindful of these sorts of thing.

 

[wdwmom3]

Has anybody who will send their 10 year old and older stopped to think about what this will do to people of certain religions?

I'm British and don't have a religion that it would cause problems with, but Disney sees people come from all over the world, I know for a fact that there are some cultures where you bringing your 10 year old into the restroom would really cause issues for these women.
I think you need to stop thinking about yourselves and also think about what your doing to others with your insecurities.

I can't remember at what age I started sending my son alone but I'm sorry no matter what his age, if I feel it would be unsafe to let him go alone or for him to wait outside alone while I go then I'm taking him. My child's safety is way more important the. Someone feeling uncomfortable.

 

[kevschickee]

I can't remember at what age I started sending my son alone but I'm sorry no matter what his age, if I feel it would be unsafe to let him go alone or for him to wait outside alone while I go then I'm taking him. My child's safety is way more important the. Someone feeling uncomfortable.

When it comes to religion it is more then feeling uncomfortable.

 

[cheer25mom]

When it comes to religion it is more then feeling uncomfortable.

Very much more. In some more conservative sects, there would be very real consequences.

 

[wdwmom3]

Very much more. In some more conservative sects, there would be very real consequences.

I'm sorry but my child's safety still comes first. Now my oldest is turning 12 and has been going on his own or waiting just outside for me for a few years. But before then I was a single mom. And if I had to go and we were in a busy crowded place yes he definitely came with me. I'm sorry but I'm not ever going to put my child in what I feel is an unsafe situation no matter what.

 

[DLgal]

I am a mother of 2 boys. They are both on the Autism Spectrum. My older one is almost 9 and I let him go in the men's room alone, because he is very self sufficient. My younger one just turned 7, but I won't let him go into a men's room alone yet. He still pulls his pants ALL the way down to "go" and I certainly don't want him exposing his hiney like that in a men's room.

For what it's worth, when I am alone with my boys, I am fine with letting both of them wait outside the women's room for me if they don't have to go. We do that often.

Also, FWIW, my HUSBAND is horrified that I allow my older son into men's rooms alone. He hates it, but I have to constantly remind him that he is getting old and he's more than capable of using a men's room at this point, so I let him do it (I wait right outside, though, and I am more comfortable with him in men's rooms that don't have a door, so I can "hear" what's going on inside). My husband would rather me still bring both boys into the women's room when I am out with them alone.

Safety first, always. I do what I feel comfortable with at the time. At Disney, my husband takes the boys into the men's room, unless we find a family restroom and can all go in together.

 

[cheer25mom]

I'm sorry but my child's safety still comes first. Now my oldest is turning 12 and has been going on his own or waiting just outside for me for a few years. But before then I was a single mom. And if I had to go and we were in a busy crowded place yes he definitely came with me. I'm sorry but I'm not ever going to put my child in what I feel is an unsafe situation no matter what.

And that is the crux of the situation, where do one person's right end and another's begin? How much "concern for saftey" is founded and how much is paranoia that infrenges on the rights of others? These are not easy questions, and the answer is not always "my point of view is right" or "my kid first". Some would argue that you are being needlessly paranoid to the point of infringing on someone else's right to privacy and safety, and yes, some Muslim women are no longer safe if they allow themselves to be seen uncovered. Not saying that they are right, but there is a counter argument there to be considered and it is certianly not a cut and dried issue where the rights of moms of boys always take priority.

 

[cheer25mom]

I My younger one just turned 7, but I won't let him go into a men's room alone yet. He still pulls his pants ALL the way down to "go" and I certainly don't want him exposing his hiney like that in a men's room.

.

I am often out with a family member's child who does this. WE send him into the men's room and tell him to go into a stall and close the door. Problem solved!

 

[2012bella13]

Thanks for the clarification. I was afraid you would start the next new trend, people hauling cans of lysol around and spraying everything in sight!

You made my day, thanks for the laugh!!!

 

[2012bella13]

IME, the girls' rooms usually stay relatively clean, except for paper towels on the floor when they shoot for the trash can and miss. Unfortunately, little boys tend to miss something else entirely: the toilet. Boys' restrooms in schools tend to stink to high heaven of urine by the end of the school day, and eventually pretty much all the time when the school hasn't been renovated for awhile, because eventually it gets into cracks under the floor and can't be mopped away.

Also in my experience, most grade schools only have one or two janitors, and they are usually male. Most of the time they don't clean the bathrooms unless the children are not present at the school, so they get cleaned only after-hours. Vomit is usually cleaned immediately halls or classrooms, but in the student bathrooms, only if someone reports it, otherwise it stays there until after school lets out. (Also, usually clogged toilets just have the stall blocked until the janitor can take care of the blockage after school lets out, which means that it might be smelling pretty foul for hours.)

Maybe I better become a volunteer Janitor?? What do you think??

 

[2012bella13]

I am a little leery of bringing this up, since the last time I said anything about a molestation situation I was flamed and completely misinterpreted...but I feel I must. I have two young boys myself, and it makes me incredibly nervous to think of them using the restroom alone. There are several incidents in the media of rapes in public restrooms in different areas of the country, and one in California where a nine year old was murdered in a state park bathroom while his aunt waited outside. She even asked the assailant if he was still in there as he was leaving, and he told her yes.
I know it's Disney, and people think it is safer, but after reading all these incidents it will be a while before my boys will be going in a restroom alone.

Prayers for that little boy's family.

 

[kevschickee]

I have learned as a parent that you can't worry about the what ifs. I don't want to put the fear if god in my children. What we see on the news is the worst of the worst.

 

[cheer25mom]

I have learned as a parent that you can't worry about the what ifs. I don't want to put the fear if god in my children. What we see on the news is the worst of the worst.

I take this approach as well. We see more of the bad nowadays with the advent of instant coverage and news all the time. The statistics show that fewer children are being victimized, but we are constantly exposed to it now so fear is at an all time high, while actual incidents are at an all time low.

 

[kevschickee]

I take this approach as well. We see more of the bad nowadays with the advent of instant coverage and news all the time. The statistics show that fewer children are being victimized, but we are constantly exposed to it now so fear is at an all time high, while actual incidents are at an all time low.

 

[StitchesGr8Fan]

I take this approach as well. We see more of the bad nowadays with the advent of instant coverage and news all the time. The statistics show that fewer children are being victimized, but we are constantly exposed to it now so fear is at an all time high, while actual incidents are at an all time low.

I agree. These things always happened, people just didnt report it, or it wasn't as widely reported. When my mom was in kindergarten 65 years ago a man with a knife jumped out of a tree and chased her. It didnt get reported in the paper, only her family knew.

My mom raised me to be afraid of everything! Now as an adult when I'm nervous to do something normal because there might be a bad person lurking, she asks me how I got so afraid. I actually screamed at her "you made me that way!"

 

[cheer25mom]

I agree. These things always happened, people just didnt report it, or it wasn't as widely reported. When my mom was in kindergarten 65 years ago a man with a knife jumped out of a tree and chased her. It didnt get reported in the paper, only her family knew.

My mom raised me to be afraid of everything! Now as an adult when I'm nervous to do something normal because there might be a bad person lurking, she asks me how I got so afraid. I actually screamed at her "you made me that way!"

I had one of those moms too. She felt the need to tell me in great detail about all the bad things that could happen to me. I really didn't appreciate it, and by the time I was in my teens, started telling her I didn't want to hear it.

 

[kevschickee]

I had one of those moms too. She felt the need to tell me in great detail about all the bad things that could happen to me. I really didn't appreciate it, and by the time I was in my teens, started telling her I didn't want to hear it.

Wow exactly how mine was too

 

[Skippy918]

Whenever we are out and about and my son has to use the bathroom, he insists on using the men's room. He's only 4 1/2 but has always been the independent type. If DH is with me, I make him go in there to make sure he's okay and can reach the sink and soap.

 

[Moodyzblu]

Mine are 8 and still go in the ladies room with me. Thats just how it is and what I am comfortable with. If there is a family/companion restroom, we use that.

 

[Schmeck]

Mine are 8 and still go in the ladies room with me. Thats just how it is and what I am comfortable with. If there is a family/companion restroom, we use that.

So, do they go in the stall with you? BTW, Disney does not have family restrooms, only companion ones, and there is no privacy in there, just a single toilet and sink. What do they do when you use the toilet?