Big Family Trips

Tinkerbell1989

DIS Veteran
Joined
May 17, 2010
Messages
937
So I've been away with a big family before, there was 8 of us. We all paid our own way so we could all plan together.

We're going away again in December but there is 12 of us! The difference this time is that we're not paying, and we aren't involved in the planning at all. I've offered my support, I've given ideas and I've even volunteered to book a couple of ADRs.

The problem is that the plans my Grandad has made are... rubbish!! There's a lot of unnecessary park hopping, very early dinners (5.30 tea time?!) and Epcot almost everyday (I mean, I like Epcot but...)

I've been told I'm not allowed to argue because it's not "my holiday"...

Anyone else ever had this kind of problem? Any advice?

Steffi xx
 
Not been in that situation but Ouch! I'd hate that! And then feel torn because I'm not paying for it etc...

How concrete are the plans? As there's lots of you, do you think you'll be able to break off in to smaller groups? Or just go off and do your own things some days?
 
Could you gently explain that although you are not paying for the trip in financial terms you (and/or your other half) are using up precious annual leave entitlement and would like a few days doing your choice of activity and then would re-join the group for dinner (however early that might be)?
 
Feeling for you hun. I know we have already spoke but I hope you get it sorted. I'm lucky in one way on our next trip all the planning and ADRs have been left to me x
 

Sundancer UK said:
Not been in that situation but Ouch! I'd hate that! And then feel torn because I'm not paying for it etc...

How concrete are the plans? As there's lots of you, do you think you'll be able to break off in to smaller groups? Or just go off and do your own things some days?

They're pretty concrete, even my Mum tried to give some sort of advice and input which was ignored. Hopefully my fiance and I will be able to go off and do a few things ourselves, and/or with my brother and sister but apart from that, its his way!

Dimplenose said:
Could you gently explain that although you are not paying for the trip in financial terms you (and/or your other half) are using up precious annual leave entitlement and would like a few days doing your choice of activity and then would re-join the group for dinner (however early that might be)?

I hadnt thought of using that! That might work... for instance, we wanted to go to Polynesian for cocktails and to watch the fireworks one night but when I suggested it, he ignored me! Thankyou :)

Xx
 
I feel for you love, whilst Ive never done a big family WDW holiday as an adult, I remember all too well these "events" as a child!!

Is there anyway at all you could gently suggest that the fireworks are so fantastic, and viewed from XXXX would be a lovely experience, especially after a lovely dinner... or maybe use crowd trackers to show the busiest Epcot days to "suggest" that the group do something else that day to make it more comfortable and less crowded.

Last resort, would the person paying for the holiday accept any payment at all from you and your DF to give you a bit more "freedom"??
 
tinks_1989 said:
Feeling for you hun. I know we have already spoke but I hope you get it sorted. I'm lucky in one way on our next trip all the planning and ADRs have been left to me x

It might be because I'm at a bit of a loss... you know I love to plan!

Ciorsdah said:
I feel for you love, whilst Ive never done a big family WDW holiday as an adult, I remember all too well these "events" as a child!!

Is there anyway at all you could gently suggest that the fireworks are so fantastic, and viewed from XXXX would be a lovely experience, especially after a lovely dinner... or maybe use crowd trackers to show the busiest Epcot days to "suggest" that the group do something else that day to make it more comfortable and less crowded.

Last resort, would the person paying for the holiday accept any payment at all from you and your DF to give you a bit more "freedom"??

My Grandad is taking us as part of his birthday present to himself... we're trying to plan him a meal to say thankyou and happy birthday. I'll try the crowd planners (although its pretty busy all 2 weeks as we're going over Christmas)!

Thankyou xx
 
Eeek --- that's a tough one. I have nothing constructive to offer but I hope you can get to give some input to make the trip more enjoyable for everyone. I admire you for going along with it, personally I couldn't (Type A personality :rotfl2:) I would rather pay myself and have control over my trip but that's just the way I am. Good luck and good on your Granddad for paying for a trip for everyone for his birthday.
 
MrRomance said:
Eeek --- that's a tough one. I have nothing constructive to offer but I hope you can get to give some input to make the trip more enjoyable for everyone. I admire you for going along with it, personally I couldn't (Type A personality :rotfl2:) I would rather pay myself and have control over my trip but that's just the way I am. Good luck and good on your Granddad for paying for a trip for everyone for his birthday.

Thank you anyway :) I'd just like to point out that in no way am I ungrateful, I appreciate how lucky I am to be able to go back to WDW without having to pay for it. It's just unfortunate that I am also very Type A! We all want to make sure Grandad has a fab birthday, and at the end of the day, if its his way or no way, I would still take his way!!

A bad day at Disney is still better than a good day at work!!

X
 
Well I am in exact opposite situation. I am planning a large family trip which my MIL is paying for.


And although we and one of the other parties have/can go to Disney many times, for the other party this will be a one off, so I want them to really really enjoy it - pressure is on!.

Also as my MIL is paying- so if she wants us to spend a day in the villa - or even at Walmart for the whole day (ha ha) then as she is paying for our whole family to get together which is rare (we are in Italy , UK and Caribbean) then as far as I am concerned everyone better enjoy and appreciate it even the teens :rotfl:


My main worry is that I will plan it right so that my MIL and the family who have never been get to enjoy this holiday more than they had hoped.


If I where you - I would just go along with what ever is planned- It is an extra holiday for you (no money - just time). And you have plenty time to go again and do want you would prefer on another visit in the future when you are paying.

Words of wisdom from someone from large a family - you will enjoy the whole holiday more if you just go with the flow and don't get stressed out. Even if you got to do it the way you wanted if it had caused any stress you would end up enjoying it less than doing what your gandad wanted but without any agro.

Just enjoy and remember many many other would happily go in your place.
 
I think you should just go with the flow and do your own thing on your next trip. It may not be your plan but it will be Disney. How bad could it be?! I agree with the above poster.

That said. I bet you find there will be flexibility once you get there whatever the plan is. Everyone in a group of 12 is going to want space, even if they don't know it now ;)
 
Mrs Doubtfire said:
Pull a sickie one day and when the coast is clear do whatever you want ;)

Haha, brilliant!

mackay_j said:
Well I am in exact opposite situation. I am planning a large family trip which my MIL is paying for.

And although we and one of the other parties have/can go to Disney many times, for the other party this will be a one off, so I want them to really really enjoy it - pressure is on!.

Also as my MIL is paying- so if she wants us to spend a day in the villa - or even at Walmart for the whole day (ha ha) then as she is paying for our whole family to get together which is rare (we are in Italy , UK and Caribbean) then as far as I am concerned everyone better enjoy and appreciate it even the teens :rotfl:

My main worry is that I will plan it right so that my MIL and the family who have never been get to enjoy this holiday more than they had hoped.

If I where you - I would just go along with what ever is planned- It is an extra holiday for you (no money - just time). And you have plenty time to go again and do want you would prefer on another visit in the future when you are paying.

Words of wisdom from someone from large a family - you will enjoy the whole holiday more if you just go with the flow and don't get stressed out. Even if you got to do it the way you wanted if it had caused any stress you would end up enjoying it less than doing what your gandad wanted but without any agro.

Just enjoy and remember many many other would happily go in your place.

Thankyou for putting it into perspective for me :) I think I enjoy the planning side so much that I was a little upset that no one thought to include me! Like I said before, I know I am very lucky to be going; the plans just seem like lots of park hopping and unnecessary travelling. But, as you've quite rightly said, its not upto me, so I guess I should enjoy the ride!
Thanks again x
 
oh my....must admit if that was my situation I just couldn't go along as I just know how it would pan out and we prob would never speak to each other again. I think that all groups need time away from each other.

He may be paying for your holiday but you are giving him your time and spending your own money while you are there and you really should be able to have some say in what you do and where you want to spend it!...I would go with what a pp said and pull a sickie in an evening and go off and do my own thing and pull a sickie the following day as well. For my own sanity I would have to get away once in a while.

We went as a big group (DH's side of the family) and we would never do it again. I also pulled a sickie when I just knew I couldn't spend another day with them all and it was enough time to compose myself again, sick a smile on my face and carry on.:) We also booked an extra week by ourselves at the end of the family holiday as we knew we would need it. I remember waving at them all on the DME then DH and I turned away and had the biggest grins on our faces.

But that's just MY family and every family is different and you may be fine...
 
I'm just back from a large family holiday 18 of us 5 being under 16 months. Luckily all the planning was left to me I did have some rest days in between with so many young babies/toddlers. I hope you get a day or 2 to do what you want as its always nice to break away. Most times when we go to Florida we don't plan I like to plan the day before lol but with having such a big group we thought a plan would work better we all came home still talking lol and had a wonderful time :).
 

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