Blueeyes101817
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Hope you had a good weekend and you got a chance to relax a bit
Beth's Journal-Bring It!
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sarahsmom73
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Stopping in to say I hope everything is going smoothly at work! Have a great day! 
for your Monday!
sarahsmom73
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Happy Monday Beth! Hope your weekend was smooth! 
toystoryduo
DIS Veteran
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Hi Beth!
I hope you had a good weekend! Take care!
I hope you had a good weekend! Take care!
Hi guys,
I'm sorry I didn't do journals yesterday. I wasn't in a place where I could be honest or supportive. There is a HUGE RANT ahead, so feel free to skip it.
Won's mom is in the hospital with a hypertensive crisis. Her BP is 240's/160's. She has been hypertensive for years. Apparently, she has been so stressed over the situation with Katie, that she has stopped taking her meds. Won's dad called Sunday to speak with him. Won went over to the house. His parents know how to manipulate him well. Keep in mind FIL is a psychiatrist. Won comes home, and calls the neighbor to see if katie can visit for a bit. He wants to take Kate to the hospital to see his mother. It will help her get better. She stopped her meds because she cant see Katie. It may be just wha she needs to get over this crisis. I said no. He was saying, "She is my mother. She is ill. How can you be so cold." My response was<" She is your mother, and you should go see her. I am Katie's Mother and she will not be put in that situation. I will Not allow her to see you Mother under ANY circumstances. It isn't safe for her, or me." He wanted to take her into a CCU. No way. I explained that I became so cold towa4rds his mother when she pushed me down the stairs when I was pregnant, when she assaulted me, when she kidnapped Katie, and when she tried to kidnap her a 2nd time. If she stopped her meds because she is depressed over the situation with Katie, then she needs a suicide watch and ongoing psychiatric treatment. It is her responsibility and manipulation at work right now. He stormed out. I picked up Katie. I ended up binging. I have no idea how many calories I ate, but it was in the 1000's. I am so angry at myself for letting her get to me. I am not proud of the things I said to Won, but I was honest. He came home about midnight. We still haven't talked.
My 1st inclination today was to kill myslef on the glider at the Y today. I didn't. I just don't have the reserves to do that. I also promised to take it easy. I did my 30 minutes and walked for 1 mile. I am trying to focus on water and healthy food today.
Won and I will need to talk tonight. I am not looking forward to it.
I need to go get my daughter. I'll be back later.
Beth
I'm sorry I didn't do journals yesterday. I wasn't in a place where I could be honest or supportive. There is a HUGE RANT ahead, so feel free to skip it.
Won's mom is in the hospital with a hypertensive crisis. Her BP is 240's/160's. She has been hypertensive for years. Apparently, she has been so stressed over the situation with Katie, that she has stopped taking her meds. Won's dad called Sunday to speak with him. Won went over to the house. His parents know how to manipulate him well. Keep in mind FIL is a psychiatrist. Won comes home, and calls the neighbor to see if katie can visit for a bit. He wants to take Kate to the hospital to see his mother. It will help her get better. She stopped her meds because she cant see Katie. It may be just wha she needs to get over this crisis. I said no. He was saying, "She is my mother. She is ill. How can you be so cold." My response was<" She is your mother, and you should go see her. I am Katie's Mother and she will not be put in that situation. I will Not allow her to see you Mother under ANY circumstances. It isn't safe for her, or me." He wanted to take her into a CCU. No way. I explained that I became so cold towa4rds his mother when she pushed me down the stairs when I was pregnant, when she assaulted me, when she kidnapped Katie, and when she tried to kidnap her a 2nd time. If she stopped her meds because she is depressed over the situation with Katie, then she needs a suicide watch and ongoing psychiatric treatment. It is her responsibility and manipulation at work right now. He stormed out. I picked up Katie. I ended up binging. I have no idea how many calories I ate, but it was in the 1000's. I am so angry at myself for letting her get to me. I am not proud of the things I said to Won, but I was honest. He came home about midnight. We still haven't talked.
My 1st inclination today was to kill myslef on the glider at the Y today. I didn't. I just don't have the reserves to do that. I also promised to take it easy. I did my 30 minutes and walked for 1 mile. I am trying to focus on water and healthy food today.
Won and I will need to talk tonight. I am not looking forward to it.
I need to go get my daughter. I'll be back later.
Beth
pearlieq
<font color=green>They can sit & spin<br><font col
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Oh, Beth! I'm so sorry. 
to help you get through this. You did the right thing, but I'm sure that's cold comfort. You did a great job recognizing that Katie is your primary concern and his parents can't be using her to manipulate either of you.
You seem to already get this, but it bears repearting. This is HER problem, not yours. You didn't cause it and nothing you do or don't do will change it. She needs psychiatric care--she does not need to be able to use her health as a bargaining chip. Healthy people do not do that, and a person in that mental state cannot do anything but harm to your daughter.
Take it easy on yourself. Sometimes it's all you can do just to put one foot in front of the other and get through it.
to help you get through this. You did the right thing, but I'm sure that's cold comfort. You did a great job recognizing that Katie is your primary concern and his parents can't be using her to manipulate either of you. You seem to already get this, but it bears repearting. This is HER problem, not yours. You didn't cause it and nothing you do or don't do will change it. She needs psychiatric care--she does not need to be able to use her health as a bargaining chip. Healthy people do not do that, and a person in that mental state cannot do anything but harm to your daughter.
Take it easy on yourself. Sometimes it's all you can do just to put one foot in front of the other and get through it.
DoeWDW
I've been a bit naughty since you've been away
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Beth, feel free to rant away here in your journal. It's a safe place where you can let out all those emotions.
I am all for forgiveness and compassion, but frankly, I think you did the right thing and I'm proud of you for sticking up for your daughter. This woman has no right to see or influence a little girl who would not understand her manipulations. Why Won can't see that is beyond me. I agree with you that he should be free to visit - he is an adult - but Katie is just too young to understand. A CCU can be a scary place for a little one, but to add in a relative who is mentally unstable and may say who knows what????
Yes, you had a bit too much food (an understatement, I know - I've been there myself
). It's in the past. Consider it a grand shock to your metabolism and move forward. Do what you can to release your stress and anxiety in other ways - easier said than done,
I know one of your prime outlets is exercise and I am so so so proud of you for holding back at the Y.
Oh how I wish I had some words of wisdom for you. I also wish I could be closer to give you a hug and a shoulder to cry on in person. Instead, this will have to do.
Keep the faith, Beth.
I am all for forgiveness and compassion, but frankly, I think you did the right thing and I'm proud of you for sticking up for your daughter. This woman has no right to see or influence a little girl who would not understand her manipulations. Why Won can't see that is beyond me. I agree with you that he should be free to visit - he is an adult - but Katie is just too young to understand. A CCU can be a scary place for a little one, but to add in a relative who is mentally unstable and may say who knows what????
Yes, you had a bit too much food (an understatement, I know - I've been there myself
). It's in the past. Consider it a grand shock to your metabolism and move forward. Do what you can to release your stress and anxiety in other ways - easier said than done, I know one of your prime outlets is exercise and I am so so so proud of you for holding back at the Y.
Oh how I wish I had some words of wisdom for you. I also wish I could be closer to give you a hug and a shoulder to cry on in person. Instead, this will have to do.
Keep the faith, Beth.
wilderness01
Been There, Done That, Going Back!
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I am so sorry Beth. You did the right thing and you know it. Do not let Won's emotions cloud your judgements. Was her blood pressure unstable when she let the air our of his tires as well? 
It is sad but he needs to make a choice in this and the choice needs to be his family, you and Katie. That woman is sick and should not be around either of you. His father is ill as well to continue to allow this all to happen. Shame on him because he is a professional who is supposed to know how to deal with these situations. It is really a shame. We have never been through anything violent like what you have experienced but my husband's parents have treated us/the kids very poorly and my husband will finally after many, many years of this, "side" with me but only for a short period. They get to him EVERY time and manipulate him back into their way of thinking. It has caused so much strain over the years so really I feel for you. It is not a pretty situation for anyone to be in. Maybe Katie should go to your mom's for the week? Just a suggestion. Beth you have handled yourself well in the past year with all this stress. Do not beat yourself up for eating overboard, who could blame you? I hope you two can get this resolved with Katie's best interests involved. Not taking your medicine is self-induced and self-destructive. Doesn't Won see that? Another manipulation from his parents. Nice.
Frankly it is his problem and his parents. I know that sounds cold but come on! He needs to think about what she has done to you/Katie. That is fine if he forgives her but to put Katie in danger is just not right. Hold your head high and continue to protect yourself/Katie. Hugs to you my friend. You will get through this.
You did the right thing and you know it. Do not let Won's emotions cloud your judgements. Was her blood pressure unstable when she let the air our of his tires as well? It is sad but he needs to make a choice in this and the choice needs to be his family, you and Katie. That woman is sick and should not be around either of you. His father is ill as well to continue to allow this all to happen. Shame on him because he is a professional who is supposed to know how to deal with these situations. It is really a shame. We have never been through anything violent like what you have experienced but my husband's parents have treated us/the kids very poorly and my husband will finally after many, many years of this, "side" with me but only for a short period. They get to him EVERY time and manipulate him back into their way of thinking. It has caused so much strain over the years so really I feel for you. It is not a pretty situation for anyone to be in. Maybe Katie should go to your mom's for the week? Just a suggestion. Beth you have handled yourself well in the past year with all this stress. Do not beat yourself up for eating overboard, who could blame you? I hope you two can get this resolved with Katie's best interests involved. Not taking your medicine is self-induced and self-destructive. Doesn't Won see that? Another manipulation from his parents. Nice. Frankly it is his problem and his parents. I know that sounds cold but come on! He needs to think about what she has done to you/Katie. That is fine if he forgives her but to put Katie in danger is just not right. Hold your head high and continue to protect yourself/Katie. Hugs to you my friend. You will get through this. 
sharoncity
Mom of 2; Wishing I was in WDW; I WILL conquer the
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Dear, sweet Beth - . I am SO sorry you are going thru all this. It is so obvious that she stopped taking her meds so that she could manipulate everyone. "Oh, poor PG. She is so upset she stopped taking her meds. We had better do whatever she wants. Blah, blah, blah....." It is so difficult for your husband to see this because it IS his mother. Bottomline, he loves her, as he should. A mother's/child's love is unconditional. But it by no means gives her the right to see Katie. Hold your ground here Beth! It is so important. You ARE doing the right thing! 
I am glad to see you didn't go crazy at the Y. Getting yourself more sick is not going to help your situation. Drink your water and take care of yourself. We'll just forget about what you ate yesterday, okay?!
Go gently Beth. You will get through this. Don't forget, You have us here for support
Prayers and
for you Beth!
TTFN- Sharon
. I am SO sorry you are going thru all this. It is so obvious that she stopped taking her meds so that she could manipulate everyone. "Oh, poor PG. She is so upset she stopped taking her meds. We had better do whatever she wants. Blah, blah, blah....." It is so difficult for your husband to see this because it IS his mother. Bottomline, he loves her, as he should. A mother's/child's love is unconditional. But it by no means gives her the right to see Katie. Hold your ground here Beth! It is so important. You ARE doing the right thing! I am glad to see you didn't go crazy at the Y. Getting yourself more sick is not going to help your situation. Drink your water and take care of yourself. We'll just forget about what you ate yesterday, okay?!
Go gently Beth. You will get through this. Don't forget, You have us here for support
Prayers and
for you Beth!TTFN- Sharon
sarahsmom73
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Oh Beth! I am so sorry! I wish there was something i could do! Please know I am thinking of you! You did the right thing! 
plutosmyfav
<font color=deeppink>Has high hopes, high apple pi
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Beth,
You have every right to stand your ground with your daughters safety and well being. My MIL is serious bi-polar. There came a day when I said no more visits with the kids and it was very, very difficult. There are times when I feel guilty (she is nearing passing on these days) but her sickness just is too much for my kids. You keep doing what you know is right in your heart. I can really relate to the cold, resentment feelings, too. I never had physical encounters with my MIL but very difficult emotional ones. I let her live with us for a year, I visited her in the hospital probably over a 100 times, but the one time I couldn't do something for her I was dirt. It went on over and over until I just closed the door.
Good luck
Sunny
You have every right to stand your ground with your daughters safety and well being. My MIL is serious bi-polar. There came a day when I said no more visits with the kids and it was very, very difficult. There are times when I feel guilty (she is nearing passing on these days) but her sickness just is too much for my kids. You keep doing what you know is right in your heart. I can really relate to the cold, resentment feelings, too. I never had physical encounters with my MIL but very difficult emotional ones. I let her live with us for a year, I visited her in the hospital probably over a 100 times, but the one time I couldn't do something for her I was dirt. It went on over and over until I just closed the door.
Good luckSunny
CruisingCA2005
<font color=purple>Loves Nut Goodies!<br><font col
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Beth:
I wish there were something I could do or say to make this whole situation go away for you. I hope things go well this week and here's a big WISH hug for you.
I wish there were something I could do or say to make this whole situation go away for you. I hope things go well this week and here's a big WISH hug for you.
Hi Everyone,
Won has apologized. He knows that I m right. It was mostly the shock that caused him to suggest it. He did go see his Mom, and she definately tried more manipulation. I won't forgive her for that. He then went to Ann Arbor to see his brother. Victor agrees with me.
Today has not been perfect, but it has been better. I have done my best to stay on tack, but emotions and exhaustion have taken a toll. Iam trying t make sure this doesn't affect katie..
I am sorry I won't make it to journals today. I am exhausted and going to bed. Your support has meant the world to me today. I cannot thank everyone of you enough. It is a wonderful feeling knowing that i can come here. It is safe and there is unlimited support. Thank you.
Tomorow is a new day, and I can start again.
I'm off to sleep.
Beth
Won has apologized. He knows that I m right. It was mostly the shock that caused him to suggest it. He did go see his Mom, and she definately tried more manipulation. I won't forgive her for that. He then went to Ann Arbor to see his brother. Victor agrees with me.
Today has not been perfect, but it has been better. I have done my best to stay on tack, but emotions and exhaustion have taken a toll. Iam trying t make sure this doesn't affect katie..
I am sorry I won't make it to journals today. I am exhausted and going to bed. Your support has meant the world to me today. I cannot thank everyone of you enough. It is a wonderful feeling knowing that i can come here. It is safe and there is unlimited support. Thank you.
Tomorow is a new day, and I can start again.
I'm off to sleep.
Beth
Tera
Do or do not, there is no try
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- Mar 5, 2004
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Hi Beth - I'm sorry your having such a tough time right now. I'm thinking staying OP is the least of your worries right now. Don't worry about that... keep drinking your water and try to exercise when you can, but don't worry about the food. I'm glad Won understands your point and lucky for him he apologized 
I hope things get better soon for you, you deserve it.
I hope things get better soon for you, you deserve it.
toystoryduo
DIS Veteran
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Oh Beth,
Sweetie, I am so sorry that you are going through this situation with PG again. You did the right thing and I am glad that Won and his brother see that.
You and your family are in my prayers , Beth.
Sweetie, I am so sorry that you are going through this situation with PG again. You did the right thing and I am glad that Won and his brother see that.
You and your family are in my prayers , Beth.
wilderness01
Been There, Done That, Going Back!
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I'm glad Won realized his knee jerk reaction was wrong and that his brother supports you as well. You two will be ok as long as you lean on each other. Take care of yourself today.
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