Baby Name Question

[waffles77]

I think it is odd as well. I wouldn't be happy if a first cousin was named the same.

We are a close family and a couple of kids have names that begin with the same letter. It's not so much fun when trying to get the right name out. My brain doesn't work the same as it once did.

Huh. I guess then maybe have two with the same name might not be a bad idea. LOL! Might make it easier when everyone is older to just have to remember one name!

 

[Skywalker]

Yeah, I think you're out of line to be "irritated and frustrated". This is their decision to make, not yours. I know they asked for your input but you could have just been gracious and given your blessing for them to make their own decisions. (They ultimately will do what they want to do anyway. As they should.) Power struggles over something that are not your business are really a waste of time.

 

[LBIJim]

What is the name in question.

I hope it's not Lemonjello, Orangejello, or Le-a (Ledasha). There are already WAY too many kids with those names.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Eh, whatever. Not something I would care about.

(Editing to say I am 50 and just do not give 2 hoots about stuff like that anymore.)

 

[ronandannette]

Oh, I didn't even think of that. Duh. I guess when I am allowed to start dating a boy when I turn 14 in July I better start looking for only child guys.

A little OT, but Hon, that's not a great idea for all sorts of reasons - tons of them are spoiled and expect you to take up where momma left off. Trust me, you want a good, solid middle-child and hopefully not the only son.

 

[mom2grace]

My step brother and his first cousin have the same first name but have different last names (I don't know about the middle names). They are the only male cousins in that family. I didn't know them until I was an adult, but I find it to be strange. I don't know the back story.

 

[SC Minnie]

It's not a hill I would be willing to die on.

DHs has a niece that I had only every heard called Katie. When DD was born we named her Catherine. Turns out Katie's name is really Catherine-- spelled the same way. I didn't know that until after she was born. Now Katie likes to go by Catherine.

 

[LilPiglet]

A little OT, but Hon, that's not a great idea for all sorts of reasons - tons of them are spoiled and expect you to take up where momma left off. Trust me, you want a good, solid middle-child and hopefully not the only son.

I was actually just joking around. When I get to the point of marrying a guy in maybe 10 to 15 years from now I will be certain it is the right guy for me. If he treats me right, we have fun together, and we are good at working on things together than I think he could be a good fit. I have a very good example to go by in my Mom and Dad and they do all of those things I mentioned.

 

[smitch425]

Weird, but fine in my book. My sister's name is Emily, and our brother married an Emily. My kids call them Aunt Emily #1 and Aunt Emily #2. They even have the same middle initial, and until my sister got married, they had the same last name. Does it get confusing at times? Yes. Does it require extra words when referring to them? Yes. Is it a big deal? Not in the least bit. There are thousands, maybe millions, of people with your child's name. Just because you know one of them who is close to you is really not going to be that big of a deal. Congrats on your new niece.

 

[Mizzoufan]

I hope it's not Lemonjello, Orangejello, or Le-a (Ledasha). There are already WAY too many kids with those names.

 

[Handbag Lady]

I don't see the big deal. I grew up with an "Aunt Kathy with a K" and and "Aunt Cathy with a C." It was fun.

 

[disney world dreamer]

because your child has a rather unique name i would think it very odd for SIL to name her child your child's nickname.
it makes me feel like she wishes she had a child first and had thought to name her child that first so she is gonna "steal" it whether you like it or not.

i think it would be very different if your child had a common name like jennifer and you call her jenny and your SIL wanted to name her child jen.

my nieces both have unique names (Almon Rae and Arland Evergreen) and if anyone that my sister knows just decided they were gonna name their daughter a variation of those names she would not be happy about it and i would not blame her for being annoyed as i don't blame you for being annoyed.

i mean it does seem like a compliment to you that someone likes the name enough to name their child a variation of what you call your child but at the same time i think its kinda disrespectful especially with how close in relation you are.
these kids are first cousins and essentially have the same unique name. that doesn't make it all that unique anymore and will make things confusing when calling for one and them not know which one you are talking to.

 

[EMom]

When we were adopting DD, I planned to name her after my mother's first name and call her that. One of my siblings had used that same name, but they called their daughter by her middle name and never my mother's name so it was all good. If they had actually called their daughter my mother's name, I would have NEVER used that name for my child. As it turned out, when we took one look at DD it was clear the name didn't suit her, so we had to come up with another name.

If you forbid SIL from using "Jenny" it will probably only make the name more appealing. Just tell her it's fine to use the name and that everyone can just call her baby "Jenny 2" or simply "Two" for short.

 

[Dawnlight]

My children have unique names (for the US, at least), and I would not be happy if a family member wanted to copy. I can't say that I'd make a fuss over it, but I wouldn't be over-joyed.

I do think it's different if it's a family name and depending on the family tradition of naming.

 

[skuttle]

I think it's strange, especially since it's not a family name. I would be upset as well. And since your SIL asked, I would have also told her that yes I think it's weird.

I have a cousin named Katie. That's her actual name, not a nickname. When we were picking names, I really liked Kate for a girl, but DH vetoed it because of my cousin.

 

[TipsyTraveler]

You don't own your daughter's name, anyone is free to use it. I have a couple of names that I've loved for years and will use for children one day. If someone else uses one of those names before me? Oh well, I'm not going to give my kid a name I love less just because another kid had it first.

If anything, the girls will probably be really excited to share the same name. Running across someone with my name was always an "instant bond" kind of thing when I was little.

One of my best friends and I have the same name, different spelling. If I'm Jenny,* she's Jenni. Even at our ages it's been kind of cute. Friends and coworkers refer to us as The Jennies, J-1 and J-2, ask "Where's your tocaya?"** It's really not a big deal.

*I'm not
**Spanish word for people who have the same name.

 

[Dread Pirate]

I have four first cousins, two on my dad's side and two on my mom's side, all named John. No big deal, in my opinion. Maybe I'm just used to it, since 5 of my 15 uncles (one one great-uncle) were all named James, and all but two went by the name Jim.


Edited since I forgot that my Uncle Pat was really James Patrick.

 

[scrapquitler]

I have a five year old with a rather unique first name. She either goes by her full first name or a diminutive of that name which is, literally, half of her name. Like, Jenny for Jennifer or Danny for Daniel.

SiL is pregnant and wants to use dd's diminutive if she has a daughter. Again, like naming her daughter Gwen when my daughter was named Gwendolyn and goes by Gwen.

SiL asked me if I thought that was weird and I told her that I thought it was. That dd goes by that name. That everyone calls her that name.

Apparently, SiL is still pushing the issue and reached out to my sister today to tell her they were thinking of using this name. My sister told her it was weird and not a good idea and SiL seems to think it's no big thing and "nicknames are fair game".

Complicating this is both brother AND SiL call dd by this name, so it's not like they use her given name to speak with her. Again, it's like calling her Jenny and then wanting to USE the name Jenny for their future child.

I'm irritated and frustrated. Am I out of line?

We have 5 Michaels, 3 Brians and 2 Kathy's in my family, including two first cousins (Michael) who are within 2 years of each other.

You are making a mountain out of a molehill. Yes, you are out of line.

 

[macraven]

i have 4 sons.
son's 1 and 2 have the same middle name.
used Mr Mac's middle name for both of them.
for sons 3 and 4, different middle names.

wasn't an issue for us and those sons love sharing the same middle name.

now the first son has a son.
another son due to have a boy any day.
and they are going with a repeat of first same name.


no family problems or issues with any of it.
parents use the name they love the most.

 

[EMom]

We have 5 Michaels, 3 Brians and 2 Kathy's in my family, including two first cousins (Michael) who are within 2 years of each other.

You are making a mountain out of a molehill. Yes, you are out of line.

That shows a supreme lack of imagination, IMHO. Which is not illegal, by the way. It just reminds me of My Big Fat Greek Wedding, in which 50% of the men in the family were named Nik, Nikki, Nickolas, Little Nikki, etc. There are squillions of names out there. Why do this? I can see using a common family name as a middle name that you don't actually call the child, but to have a family get together and have multiples of several names is so easily avoided.

The OP cannot stop her SIL from naming the baby anything at all. She cannot order her not to. But if they are first cousins and HER family views it as odd, then it's not a good or considerate thing to do. If someone did that in my family, I would not take kindly to it.

When we wanted to name DD after my mother and my sibling had already used that name, (but the child didn't actually go by that name) I asked if it would bother them if we used the name. They said no because they didn't even call their daughter that. They said if they called her by that name it would have bothered them and I said if that was the case, I'd have never considered using it. The name has been in our family for several hundred years, but used one generation at a time.