Baby Coming Home Outfit

[JUJU814]

Did my kids come home wearing clothes?

Believe it or not, you'll probably have a hard time remembering ten years from now what you put on her to bring her home (or maybe even what their birthday is ). It isn't worth the drama. Although a dress IS impractical because of the carseat - though honestly, you just hike up the dress and buckle the kid in.

Well, you may be right..but my daughter is 18 and I remember so clearly the beautiful outfit I bought for her to wear home from the hospital. I was a young first time mom and this outfit was a real "splurge" for me. (maybe not the wisest spending of my money at the time, but I was soooo excited!)

I remember the little one piece outfit vividly.

The rest of her first year of life? that might be a bit of a blur to me....

 

[Zeebs]

I have put the wee outfits that the kids wore home aside for them. Although as they are boys, I know full well that the mothers of my grandchildren won't want to use them. But I will keep them for the boys anyway. I will one day be a mother in law after reading these types of threads and many others I can't think of much else more stressful.

The first was bought by my husband while overseas, I thought it was a nice thing for him to do so we used it.

My second didn't fit into the outfit we bought him as he was too big, so he went home in an outfit someone else sent him.

I haven't seen anything I like for this baby yet so I am still on the look out. But being the third time, it has to be easy to put on and take off.

Kirsten

 

[T1gger]

OK this may be the first of many decisions other people make for you

Bottom line is it is your (& your dp/dh) baby and you only get one shot at many things so make sure it is what counts for you

If you want to keep relations good then it is a pity that the dress got sicked on and you had to change her

But there will come a time when you need to put your foot down esp if MIL is involved in your lives whether it is about weaning/feeding/behaviour etc etc etc

Might be the better road to make it clear from the start. "well that is lovely but we found the perfect outfit/we decided to do xyz/ this is going to happen"

Congratulations on your little one xx

 

[Crystal824]

Ok, I am a MIL & a Mother, my daughter has a beautiful 4 year old who I have TOTALLY enjoyed dressing for years.. Big diff. when it's your daughter (or in most of your cases, YOUR mom) you can tell her exactly what you like or don't like, communication is easier with your own family which is why I have stepped back w/my son & his wife, I know this- BTW, they have no children yet, but when my beautiful DIL does get pregnant, I know it will not be the same as with my daughter. When I give my DIL christmas presents, I automatically include receipts, because I know she is such a sweetheart and would never want to hurt feelings to ask for one, so I give to her without asking, I will never know if she returns things.

I can tell you as a Grandmother, we will just continue to buy things, she will probably not even remember the "take the baby home dress" in a few weeks/months, because something else will probably replace it. I'm sure she is just excited about the baby and wants to spoil it. Please don't take that away from her, if possible try talking to her about your style and see if maybe she just doesn't know what you like. Ask her to go shopping and pick some stuff out, guaranteed she will return to buy them....

If she is a real pushy woman, then yes your husband needs to get involved and put her in her place, but if she's just excited, try to include her.

Nobody is ever going to be a close to you and your baby as you & your parents, I have a Girl, I am a daughter, I know the deal!

Thanks for you input. I agree with you communication is better between blood relatives. If my mom had bought such a dress and said it was her coming home outfit, I would have just said no it isn't. I would have no problem telling her that wasn't going to be the case and that I would be buying it. My mom would probaby never do that because she isn't really one to interfere or be pushy. My mom is one to spoil her grandchildren because I have two nephews and she is always buying them clothes and toys but she never insists that they use them for a particular purpose. In fact, she has already bought my daughter several outfits but has never once suggested I bring her home from the hospital in one of them.

I'm sure my mil is excited about the baby too. This is their first grandchild whereas my mom has two grandsons already. I have no problem with them spoiling her and buying her clothes and toys. That is fine. I do have a problem when she steps in and tries to do things that I think I should get to do as the mom such as pick out the coming home outfit. I'm sure there will be other issues down the road.

One of the pro blems is my mil has this habit of making such decisions and then telling me about them while we are alone so my DH doesn't have the opportunity to step in. For instance, my DH was outside helping his brother with some yardwork when she decided to tell me about the dress. I try to let him handle these situations because it is his family. His mom also has a tendency to yell alot when she doesn't get her way. I prefer not to deal with that type of behavior.

At any rate, she is this child's grandmother and I do want them to have a relationship. She will probably be closer to my child than my mom because she lives alot closer only about 35 miles away whereas my family lives about 500 miles away. I have no problem with that either. I just wish she would back off a little right now.

 

[Crystal824]

I have put the wee outfits that the kids wore home aside for them. Although as they are boys, I know full well that the mothers of my grandchildren won't want to use them. But I will keep them for the boys anyway. I will one day be a mother in law after reading these types of threads and many others I can't think of much else more stressful.

The first was bought by my husband while overseas, I thought it was a nice thing for him to do so we used it.

My second didn't fit into the outfit we bought him as he was too big, so he went home in an outfit someone else sent him.

I haven't seen anything I like for this baby yet so I am still on the look out. But being the third time, it has to be easy to put on and take off.

Kirsten

I'm sure you will be a great mil. I intend to keep the outfit my child comes home in, but I don't really expect her to use it for her child at least not for a coming home outfit. She may want to someday put it on her child just for fun. I plan on doing that at some point with my coming home dress with her.

 

[Becky2005]

This is besides the point but its something I wish someone had told me... take a few different kinds of outfits.

Along with IF you plan on doing a dress, make sure you get something for the baby's feet!!!!!! First time moms don't think about these little details. My DD was born in March -- my mom gave me the dress I wore when I came home from the hospital in, so I wanted her to wear that. It was a short crocheted dress -- only problem was -- March = winter in IL and it didn't even enter my mind to buy her socks/booties/anything to put on her little feet even though she was bundled up. My MIL literally went to the hospital gift shop and bought booties for her to wear because we were kind of stuck at that point.

I would just get whatever outfit you want to bring the baby home in, you can have her wear the dress for some pictures or when they come to visit/you go visit for the first time at home, etc...

 

[MSSANDRA]

most hospitals take pictures of newborns and many parents use more than one outfit. Take a few shots in the dress for her and then more in the outfit you choose.

I would dress your child in her dress for an upcomming family gathering and be sure to tell everyone that she choose the special dress for your child.

You can avoid having anyone there when you take the child home if you wish by simply being vage about the discharge time. Invite both sets over when you are ready for them.

DH and I were on very differnt pages on DS comming home outfit. I wanted totaly dressy, he wanted a tar heel foot ball outfit!! I gave in and DS thew up on it on the way home!!!! We got NO pictures anyway.

 

[sara74]

Believe it or not, you'll probably have a hard time remembering ten years from now what you put on her to bring her home (or maybe even what their birthday is ).

Oh, I remember what my first came home in! I'll never forget, because what looked like a cute little romper thingy had hidden snaps, wrapped around in some funky way and took us half the morning to get on her! (much to the amusement of the grandparents looking on who wisely held their tongues!)

DS wore a onesie and knot shorts.

DS2 - hmm, no idea what he wore, but I do know we stopped at Wendy's on the way home! (and they screwed up our order and I never got my chili!)

My suggestion? Put the dress on her, snap a few photos, and then change the outfit and take her home and love her with all your heart.

 

[everylastbreath]

Thanks for you input. I agree with you communication is better between blood relatives. If my mom had bought such a dress and said it was her coming home outfit, I would have just said no it isn't. I would have no problem telling her that wasn't going to be the case and that I would be buying it. My mom would probaby never do that because she isn't really one to interfere or be pushy. My mom is one to spoil her grandchildren because I have two nephews and she is always buying them clothes and toys but she never insists that they use them for a particular purpose. In fact, she has already bought my daughter several outfits but has never once suggested I bring her home from the hospital in one of them.

I'm sure my mil is excited about the baby too. This is their first grandchild whereas my mom has two grandsons already. I have no problem with them spoiling her and buying her clothes and toys. That is fine. I do have a problem when she steps in and tries to do things that I think I should get to do as the mom such as pick out the coming home outfit. I'm sure there will be other issues down the road.

One of the pro blems is my mil has this habit of making such decisions and then telling me about them while we are alone so my DH doesn't have the opportunity to step in. For instance, my DH was outside helping his brother with some yardwork when she decided to tell me about the dress. I try to let him handle these situations because it is his family. His mom also has a tendency to yell alot when she doesn't get her way. I prefer not to deal with that type of behavior.

At any rate, she is this child's grandmother and I do want them to have a relationship. She will probably be closer to my child than my mom because she lives alot closer only about 35 miles away whereas my family lives about 500 miles away. I have no problem with that either. I just wish she would back off a little right now.

Sometimes you have to stand up for yourself to get people to back off- without being nasty of course, because she is your husbands mother, but you are the childs mother, and therefore have all the say... If she thinks she will get away with it, she will- I bet once you stand up to her, she backs off. Just choose your battle wisely.

I don't know why but there always seems to be some kind of competition when a DIL has a baby, it's like the Alpha-Female thing.. We give it up to OUR moms, but NEVER theirs...

 

["Cinder" Ella's Mom]

My MIL gave me DH's Christening outfit for my DS's Christening. It was yellowed with age and just not what I wanted for my first child, although it was Dh's which was neat. We took some pritures of DS in it and then told MIL it was too small (it was snug!) and we bought what we wanted. And I have an incredibly wonderful MIL!!!!

 

[princess pooh]

I would just tell your MIL that the baby had a poop explosion before leaving the hospital so you had to change her out of the dress. No one ever questions the poop explosion excuse.

 

[Lindsay22]

My mother tried the same thing. She got very insulted when I wasn't doing "what she wanted" throughout my pregnancy. I live in FL and she lives in NJ. She was upset that she couldn't come to my ultrasounds, so I scheduled one in NJ just for her. She was upset that I wasn't sending out ultrasound pictures, so she got to keep the pictures from the one we scheduled for her. She was upset that we weren't going to baptize the baby, we're having a christening over the summer. My husband said that he was excited to buy our baby a silver spoon from Tiffany, she bought one. She said that she was going to buy the coming home outfit and I just lost it. I mean lost it. I called my father and explained that this was OUR baby and that we should get to do some of the things that WE want and told him that he needed to talk to her and remind her that I am the mother, not her. Dad talked to her and she asked what we were going to get and I told her. That was the end of that.

Our girl was born 5 weeks premature and has been in the NICU for the past three weeks, so we haven't gotten to take her home yet in the outfit that we picked. Of course... I mentioned to her that we couldn't find a preemie outfit for easter, so i got a newborn sized outfit and told her that I was still going to have her wear it and I didn't care if it fit or not. Yep. She sent a preemie sized easter outfit. So I put our girl in the outfit my mom sent on Sat and put her in the outfit I got on Sunday.

Good luck.

 

[MrsPooh]

[QUOTE="Cinder" Ella's Mom;36152774]My MIL gave me DH's Christening outfit for my DS's Christening. It was yellowed with age and just not what I wanted for my first child, although it was Dh's which was neat. We took some pritures of DS in it and then told MIL it was too small (it was snug!) and we bought what we wanted. And I have an incredibly wonderful MIL!!!![/QUOTE]

I can relate to this story! My MIL did the same thing. The Christening dress had been in dh's family for too many years. It had been worn by some family members a generation before MIL, everyone in my MIL's generation, my dh's generation and my niece. I so did not want to use it but my MIL insisted. It was so old, yellowed and the fabric was literally disintergrating. MIL had tried to sew some of the fabric back together but it was not of much use. It was not attractive and I was so worried it would simply fall apart while dd was wearing it. To top things off, whomever used it had to store it until the next baby was born.

I was so excited to pass that gown off to my sister-in-law for my nephew and no longer be responsible for that piece of family history.

When our surprise dd was born in 2006 I cringed when thinking about the gown but MIL brought the topic up again. Lucky for us the gown was a casualty of Hurricane Katrina and no longer in existence My sister offered to purchase a gown as the godmother and let me pick it out.