Baby #19 for the Duggars born!

[luvmy3]

You think having 19 children is selfish????

Being a mother is one of the most selfless jobs out there. She is so far from selfish.....

I have shared my opinion and I'm not going continue to bash Michelle Duggar in this thread.
If you want to know the reasons why I and others think she's selfish you can do a search here for other threads, or just google what people are saying and you'll get your answers.

 

[luvmy3]

LOL the number of kids you have has nothing to do if you have a baby in NICU. You can have your first child or your 3oth child in NICU.

Really, I wasn't aware of that

At this point in her life, Michelle Duggar is playing the odds with her pregnancies, just who is she playing those odds for? Just who is the one who loses if her luck runs out?

 

[chloelovesdisney]

Plenty of women have babies for selfish reasons, the act of becoming a mom is not selfless in and of itself.

 

[happygirl]

Really, I wasn't aware of that

At this point in her life, Michelle Duggar is playing the odds with her pregnancies, just who is she playing those odds for? Just who is the one who loses if her luck runs out?

thanks for rolling your eyes nice touch.

 

[kidshop]

At this point in her life, Michelle Duggar is playing the odds with her pregnancies, just who is she playing those odds for? Just who is the one who loses if her luck runs out?

I agree with this 100%. It's a numbers game in your 40's, number of pregnancies aside, although 19 of them may run your body down more than say 2 or 3. They have incredible genes but it was inevitable that one day something would go wrong. Maybe they will keep going, but the next time something could happen to Michelle...it is just odds.

 

[mickeyboat]

We are ALL playing the healthy baby lottery when we get pregnant. My daughters are healthy, but my first spent 2 weeks in the NICU. It didn't stop me from having another.

That being said, I do think the Duggar's need to stop. I think Josie will have a tremendous number of special needs to consider when she becomes a member of their household. I think Michelle and Jim Bob need to focus their attention on her, and not burden any of their other children with the majority of her care.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

I look at it this way, if the mother wasn't so selfish as to get pregnant 19 times, there wouldn't be a baby in the NICU fighting to survive at all. You can take from that comment what you want.

Your comment would that have to apply to the moms of all babies in NICU, for if it was not for their selfishness, the nicu could be empty.

Your conclusion is illogical as the baby being in nicu has nothing to do with the number of prior births.

 

[3prettyprincesses]

I was really sad to hear that little baby Josie was born prematurely. I hope she pulls through. I'm sure Jimbob and Michelle are very worried and concerned. While I wouldn't choose to have that many children, I hardly think that it's accurate to assume that Josie is in the condition she is because Michelle has been pregnant so many times. My sister had her 2nd baby at full term and she was in the NICU for weeks because of respiratory issues and a hole in her heart. I agree with other posters that each pregnancy is a roll of the dice as far as a healthy outcome goes. There are 1st, 2nd or 3rd pregnancies that end in premature babies (or worse) because of pre-eclampsia, etc. So to say that Michelle had this coming (or she should've known better) is poor logic IMO.

Also, I believe a large part of the reason they have so many kids is that Michelle miscarried when they were first married due to the birth control pill. She and Jimbob seemed to feel guilty over that and vowed to let God control the number of kids in their family instead. I don't necessarily agree with that and goodnesss knows, I do not have the patience to have 18 kids. I'm quite happy with my 3.

 

[luvmy3]

Your comment would that have to apply to the moms of all babies in NICU, for if it was not for their selfishness, the nicu could be empty.

Your conclusion is illogical as the baby being in nicu has nothing to do with the number of prior births.

And if you had read any of my posts you would see that I did not say specifically that it did, all that I have (tried) to do is to point out is that a woman who puts her child, and herself at risk when she has other very young children, to have her 19th baby is selfish. Had she considered anyone other than herself she would not have gotten pregnant for a 19th time and there wouldn't have been a baby born 4 months early under 2lbs trying to survive.

BTW its you're logic thats flawed, not all babies in the NICU are born to mothers over 40, who concieve soon after giving birth, who have had many previous births, C Sections, etc. Given those things, with each new pregnancy, Michelle Duggar puts her unborn child at risk as well as herself. To keep concieving she is obviously ignoring all the (known) risks, that makes HER extremely selfish.

 

[PebblesMK]

I think Michelle Duggar is a sweet, sweet lady and she seems to have immense love for her family. Jim Bob seems a little bit overbearing though. However, female bodies were made to reproduce so I don't think that she needs to stop having kids because of the stress on her body. I do feel that she needs to realize that she has 19 kids and an daughter in law...and a granddaughter and there is no time to spend quality time with each and every one of them. On one of the episodes, Jim Bob showed a sheet where kids could sign up for time with their parents. When you have to pawn off your youngest children to your oldest children so that you can care for the baby, and the kids have to use a sign up sheet for time with their parents...it's just too many kids. It's definitely possible to have love for each and every one of them, but how do you get to know 19 kids in an intimate way....to know all of their loves and frustrations. And speaking of frustrations, I would think that the older kids would get tired of caring for their siblings all the time, but they seem to not ever complain about anything...I wonder if they're afraid to?

 

[Caradana]

I have two fundamental disagreements with this family. One, I don't like the traditional way they treat their younger girls versus their younger boys (the girls do the laundry, the boys build the houses) - I wish there was a little more progressiveness in the gender views. Second, they're not big on college at all, and I am HUGE on the importance of education.

That being said, I admire the heck out of them. They strike me as good people who genuinely believe in God, hard work and the reverence of family. They also seem open to new ideas over the long term. DVR episodes of their show from 2004 and then DVR 2009 - the fashion, the hair, the travel, and a hundred other things have evolved dramatically as they've been exposed to modern media and added six figures to their family income. They aren't resolute in their ways to the exclusion of EVERYTHING else. I thought they were like aliens the first time I saw them. They, and especially I, have come a long way toward a mutual understanding since then.

I pray for the very best for that baby. She will live a good life, healthy, handicapped or in between - it won't matter, so long as she lives. I say this from about as far from these people on the American culture spectrum as a person can get, in terms of religion, hometown, industry, family structure. But I appreciate that understanding each other while being so different is part of what makes America great - as does the medical research that is keeping and hopefully will keep that baby alive.

 

[3prettyprincesses]

I have two fundamental disagreements with this family. One, I don't like the traditional way they treat their younger girls versus their younger boys (the girls do the laundry, the boys build the houses) - I wish there was a little more progressiveness in the gender views. Second, they're not big on college at all, and I am HUGE on the importance of education.

That being said, I admire the heck out of them. They strike me as good people who genuinely believe in God, hard work and the reverence of family. They also seem open to new ideas over the long term. DVR episodes of their show from 2004 and then DVR 2009 - the fashion, the hair, the travel, and a hundred other things have evolved dramatically as they've been exposed to modern media and added six figures to their family income. They aren't resolute in their ways to the exclusion of EVERYTHING else. I thought they were like aliens the first time I saw them. They, and especially I, have come a long way toward a mutual understanding since then.

I pray for the very best for that baby. She will live a good life, healthy, handicapped or in between - it won't matter, so long as she lives. I say this from about as far from these people on the American culture spectrum as a person can get, in terms of religion, hometown, industry, family structure. But I appreciate that understanding each other while being so different is part of what makes America great - as does the medical research that is keeping and hopefully will keep that baby alive.

Nice post. Regarding the gender specific roles, there was an episode or 2 where the boys had to do all the laundry and meals while the girls learned how to change the oil and such. I thought that was nice. There was also several episodes where they helped a family build an addition to the house and I recall one of the oldest girls laying tile in the bathroom floor. The comment made was that she knows tile! For the record, you couldn't pay me to lay tile!

I too am praying that their new little one makes it, hopefully without any lasting effects from being born premature. However, even if she does have some kind of handicap, I think she will be loved and cared for 100%.

 

[Ember]

You think having 19 children is selfish????

Being a mother is one of the most selfless jobs out there. She is so far from selfish.....

Plenty of women have babies for selfish reasons, the act of becoming a mom is not selfless in and of itself.

I couldn't agree more. Choosing to have children doesn't automatically mean you're a kind, caring, giving, selfless person. What nonsense!

 

[Sparx]

I have two fundamental disagreements with this family. One, I don't like the traditional way they treat their younger girls versus their younger boys (the girls do the laundry, the boys build the houses) - I wish there was a little more progressiveness in the gender views. Second, they're not big on college at all, and I am HUGE on the importance of education.

That being said, I admire the heck out of them. They strike me as good people who genuinely believe in God, hard work and the reverence of family. They also seem open to new ideas over the long term. DVR episodes of their show from 2004 and then DVR 2009 - the fashion, the hair, the travel, and a hundred other things have evolved dramatically as they've been exposed to modern media and added six figures to their family income. They aren't resolute in their ways to the exclusion of EVERYTHING else. I thought they were like aliens the first time I saw them. They, and especially I, have come a long way toward a mutual understanding since then.

I pray for the very best for that baby. She will live a good life, healthy, handicapped or in between - it won't matter, so long as she lives. I say this from about as far from these people on the American culture spectrum as a person can get, in terms of religion, hometown, industry, family structure. But I appreciate that understanding each other while being so different is part of what makes America great - as does the medical research that is keeping and hopefully will keep that baby alive.

i agree, but my fundemental disagreement is with not encouraging their children (specifically their girls) to go to college.

 

[Halloweenqueen]

I only caught one special about this family, back when it was 14 and counting. During that special the doctor advised her that she should stop because of her multiple c-sections.

I hope for the best for this child, but I think it was beyond selfish to continue to have children. These parents had a responsibility to their living children.

Bad behavior is bad behavior, no matter how good the intentions. If the mother smoked and had healthy children, would it be okay for her to continue to have children and smoke? Of course not.

She shoulld have counted her blessings and enjoyed her 14, 15, etc child. I think there was also an amount of jealousy over the grandchild. The parents did not want to be upstaged by their son and daughter in law.

 

[disneymarie]

Really, I wasn't aware of that

At this point in her life, Michelle Duggar is playing the odds with her pregnancies, just who is she playing those odds for? Just who is the one who loses if her luck runs out?

I agree with this, I had no. 4 at age 41 and unplanned was very different labors from the first.

I had an old uterus, It was ready to retire, The baby could not progress and I ended up with a swift C-section as the heart decelerated as I did.
Your Uterus can only withstand so much it ages too, it gets thin, wears out, and really is roullete at this point for Michelle and more healthy children...

My thoughts are that they are people that have a faith that says so many Duggar spirits are to be born. Personally, I think some of those spirits are meant for the children as grandchildren.

At her advancing age, and the organs, I would have said a prayer of thanks for the healthy children i was blessed with and had my tubes tied,....handing off the rest of the Duggar babies to come to the next generation.

Be blessed with what you have, to seek more is a bit odd. You should want to go through all the stages with the children you have, not have a child hanging from you chest most of your life.

I say this because as the oldest of 6 my mother had issues mentally after 6. The doctor advised to tie her tubes. My mom wanted to just keep having newborns and as they aged got handed off to me...and she would have another!

Being a Mom is more then having children. It is what you give back to those children. I never got the care as the younger kids did, I was too busy mothering them as she birthed them.

It is in more then God's hands, Michelle could be risking her own life, God is not giving her the baby's, her body is. Time to do some soul searching, and turn off the eggs.......

She is blessed and it is time to go into the next phase, the grandchildren.

 

[aprilgail2]

And speaking of frustrations, I would think that the older kids would get tired of caring for their siblings all the time, but they seem to not ever complain about anything...I wonder if they're afraid to?

I wonder which older kid is going to not have to care for this child?? If it is a special needs child then that older child is going to have their work cut out for them because you know "mom" is not going to be bothered once she weans them!

I don't necessarily agree with that and goodnesss knows, I do not have the patience to have 18 kids. I'm quite happy with my 3.

Not to hard when you only have them-breastfeed them and then once you are done with that part pass them off to an older sibling to raise!

 

[Nancyg56]

And if you had read any of my posts you would see that I did not say specifically that it did, all that I have (tried) to do is to point out is that a woman who puts her child, and herself at risk when she has other very young children, to have her 19th baby is selfish. Had she considered anyone other than herself she would not have gotten pregnant for a 19th time and there wouldn't have been a baby born 4 months early under 2lbs trying to survive.

BTW its you're logic thats flawed, not all babies in the NICU are born to mothers over 40, who concieve soon after giving birth, who have had many previous births, C Sections, etc. Given those things, with each new pregnancy, Michelle Duggar puts her unborn child at risk as well as herself. To keep concieving she is obviously ignoring all the (known) risks, that makes HER extremely selfish.

This is how I feel. I realize that the Duggan's can have as many children as they wish but I refuse to endorse their choices by watching that show. Continuing to have children willy-nilly at her age simply ignores that the chances of birth defects and birth problems increase.

When I had my third C-section after a very difficult pregnancy I was 22. My Dr told me that another pregnancy would be dangerous for me and for my unborn child. There was no way I would take a chance that I would leave the three children I had without a mother. I had already seen the difficulties that premature babies endure so I made my choice not to have any more children. I know that technology has changed the odds that premature babies have to survive and to thrive but I cannot understand how any mother would purposely play Russian Roulette with those precious lives.

I don't know, they can do what they want but my heart breaks for the little ones.

 

[happygirl]

i agree, but my fundemental disagreement is with not encouraging their children (specifically their girls) to go to college.

As far as I know a lot of the girls are going to college. Some of them want to be nurses. One of them said they wanted to teach. Even if they don't go to college they will still be okay. There are a lot of women/men who don't go to college and are ok

 

[xoprincessmomxo]

As far as I know a lot of the girls are going to college. Some of them want to be nurses. One of them said they wanted to teach. Even if they don't go to college they will still be okay. There are a lot of women/men who don't go to college and are ok

I think it's the encouraging their child not to go to college that is the problem. If it was their own choice not to go to college that is an entirely different situation. I cannot imagine encouraging my daughters not to further their education simply because they are girls.