At what age can a child go into the bathroom alone?

[wdwobsessed]

Jordansmom -

It's OK. I was probably being a little sensitive anyway. I'm having a really bad week in general and seem to be very grouchy. (lol)

I told my DH about this thread and he just rolled his eyes. I asked him if he felt I was wrong in letting my DS go into the bathroom by himself and he sais "Don't be ridiculous!" As he was saying that .... I was not sure if his attitude was a little too relaxed.

It's hard because you don't want to shelter them to the point where they cannot leave a normal life and are scared of everything..... but you want to keep them safe at the same time.

I guess my attitude is that yes, the world is more scary than it used to be. But, most people are still good.

This thread has given me food for thought.

wdwo

 

[The Hunt]

These posts seem mostly to come from moms, so here is a dad's perspective. I think fathers are likely to be more casual about this kind of thing, but we are still concerned. I also think it's a lot easier to take boys into the ladies' room than to take girls into the men's room. There is no way I would take my 7-year-old daughter into a public men's room. So I will stand right outside the door and wait for her. I agree it is better to use a rest room that has some traffic. As to the murder, it's a horrible thing, but the risk of this happening is pretty slim--and the real risk it represents is not bathrooms, but the risk of crossing the path of somebody like the killer--still pretty slim. To be honest, I'm more concerned about my kids not being careful enough to avoid sitting down on a filthy toilet seat, so I don't think they should go alone until you can trust them in that respect.

 

[pentex]

Good point, Hunt. I was awake thinking about this horrible murder last night and came to the conclusion that had the aunt taken the boy into the ladies' room, this guy probably would have followed them in there and killed both of them. After all, he had said he was stalking him that day. And he did stab another lady two days after the murder (almost killing her) so he obviously wouldn't have minded killing the aunt too.

My hubby has the same thing as you when he is out alone with our daughter. He feels he has no other choice but to wait for her outside. I think he'd rather let her pee in her pants than take her into the men's room!

 

[The Hunt]

My hubby has the same thing as you when he is out alone with our daughter. He feels he has no other choice but to wait for her outside. I think he'd rather let her pee in her pants than take her into the men's room!

If it was that desperate, I'd make her cover her eyes until she got into the stall.

 

[pentex]

Hunt.....and I assume so would my husband cover eyes and rush in a "desperate" situation. I don't understand why you made a point of quoting me as though I'd said something inappropriate. I was agreeing with you on how difficult it is for dads out with young daughters, but I guess if I make a joke, I'll be "quoted", so let me move on to another topic where I won't be analyzed.

 

[The Hunt]

Sheesh, chill out! I quoted you so people reading the thread would know what I was responding to. I wasn't analyzing or even disagreeing with you.

The question is whether you would rather have your daughter pee in her pants or see somebody else's p***** out of his pants--I'm not sure which would be more traumatic. That's why I suggested the blindfold option.

 

[pentex]

Again you insinuate that my husband would actually let my daughter go in her pants, causing a traumatic event, when any reasonable person would know that I was joking about that.

To quote someone in a thread is only done when you are emphasizing what they have said, usually in a case of a rebuttal. This thread is not so long and complicated that it necessitated you quoting me so that people would know what you meant.

This is not the Debate Board.

 

[The Hunt]

I'm so sorry I quoted you--I'm sorry I hurt your feelings. I'm sorry that you didn't recognize that I was making a joke too in my last post. At least I didn't accuse you of not loving your child [joke].

For what it's worth, I read somewhere that one of the problems with the web is that you can't hear the inflections of speech, and that makes it hard to tell when something is serious and when it isn't. So--and now I am being serious--if you thought I was insinuating something about you or your husband, I wasn't, and I'm sorry if you thought I was.

 

[Toby'sFriend]

boy has this thread caused some tensions!!!!

for the record -- I was at a gas station along an interstate yesterday and I made my 8yo son come into the ladies room with me. Boy was he angry! I will let my 2 boys (10 and 8) go into a restroom *together* -- as long as they promise to stay together. Like most moms, I am very grateful when my husband is along and we don't have to deal with it....

I must be a very trustworthy looking person however -- because I can't count the number of times I've been met with a Dad and a young daughter outside of the restroom and have been asked to escort her in. I do feel sorry for these Dad's. Women's restrooms are all stalls with doors and there is nothing going on in sight. I can understand why alot of men don't want to take their daughters into a men's restroom however!

 

[sha_lyn]

I guess DS started going to the mens room alone close to 5 but only in a few places (those with only one toilet and the one door going in locked) then a few months later let him do do in public restrroms that were larger but only one way in/out. He was about 5 or 6 and one day he had to go at target. WEll I stood close to the door then moved a bit away to look at someihing in the isle next to the rest rooms (still had perfect view of door). Well several minutes passes and 2 or 3 men came in and out but DS had still not appeared. Well the last guy out was laughing. AS I got closer to the bathroom I knew why. DS had discovered that his voice echoed and was singing at the top of his lungs. I was relieved and very imbarrased.

 

[Laurajean1014]

My son 5 (going on 6) goes with DH or I stay outside the Men's room and wait. If we're in a small restaurant I will let him go by himself (as long as its in eye sight) then I clock it!

I always ask him what he did and if he's ok!

(He once commented to me that he likes the way I treat him like a big boy. His friend who is 8 can't go to the bathroom alone and my ds thinks that his Mommy is not treating him nicely.)

He obviously does not know about "tricky people," and I thank God for that!

Have a DVC day.........

 

[CarolMN]

The best answer to this problem is the "Family restroom". Wish more places had them. I especially like the one at our local shopping mall. It has a common area with a baby changing table and a small bench. There are two interior doors, each leading to a one person restroom. One is labeled for men and one for women. They are accessible to people who travle in wheelchairs. I've used the men's room when the women's is full, the line long, no men in sight and crossing my legs wasn't working (LOL). But I definitely prefer to use the women's as it is almost always cleaner (Why is that )?

Anyway, I really do wish there were more like this. I have told the mall management that it is one reason I shop there (but not the main reason - it has a Disney Store, after all. LOL)!

When my daughter was young, my husband would not take her into the men's room. He would wait outside and sometimes he asked a Mom going in to "keep an eye on her". He also preferred restrooms with lots of "traffic". Since we were always together at Disney, we didn't have a problem there. Don't have any boys, but if I did, I certainly would not hesitiate to bring them into the Ladies Room with me if there wasn't a better option.

 

[LMHB]

Does anyone know of the availability of "family" restrooms at WDW? I haven't ever really looked, my older son was not potty trained last time. If there are not many, that would be a good thing to mention at guest serves some time (hmm...may do that if I remember).

This thread HAS caused some problems...I do think everyone is just trying to do what is best for their child, though. I don't know if I will be comfortable letting my kids go in alone at 16!!! LOL But, I guess I feel fortunate, mine are both boys and 2 years apart, so as someone said earlier, as they get older I supposed I will feel safer if they stick together. I agree about the multiple exits being a danger. I think the Unofficial Guide mentions these. Sure, there may be a "slim" chance of danger that is "statistically" safer than other things, but the slimness of a chance or a low statistic doesn't mean a hill of beans if it is YOUR child who is in harm's way.

 

[dandelion]

A few more thoughts, especially since my dh and dd (4) just returned from a trip together. They had a very long plane journey, involving transfers at 2 airports. I'll have to ask him what he did, he was considering just making sure she went on the plane.

I'd be glad to help a little girl in the restroom if her daddy asked me to. I imagine I'm fairly safe looking, as I usually have the 4Yo and 2YO with me. How far could I get with 3 kids in tow? I might suggest that to dh, to look for a similarly "safe" mom.

So, then what will I do when ds is potty trained and of an age to possibly go in alone? Again, I might look for a "safe" looking dad, but dads usually aren't the ones with the strollers and diaper bags.

I also love the companion restrooms, I've seen a few at Disney, but certainly not ALL of them. I know it would be a huge project to renovate all the public bathrooms.

When my nephews were very young, my BIL taught them it was ok to go into the ladies room with Mom, as long as they kept their eyes covered. Kind of funny but I suppose it worked.

 

[kissafrog]

My ds is only 2 1/2, but this has been a concern of mine for a while. I figure that while he is still acceptable of it, he will use the ladies room with me. Once it becomes an issue to him, I will try to shop in the malls that have family restrooms (our local one doesn't). At WDW dh will be with us, so it hopefully will not be an issue there.
On a side note, once I became a parent, I couldn't believe how hard it was to use the restroom when you're alone with the child. Most stalls are not that large, so it's hard to get a stroller in with you. It's either leave the stroller and packages unattended, or try to cram into a stall with it - ugh! Adding that most public restrooms aren't overly clean, and toddlers love to touch everything, it's a pain. I wish more shopping centers had larger restroom areas. I'm expecting another baby, and it's already crossed my mind about what fun a trip to a mall bathroom will be when I have two!

 

[dandelion]

Kissafrog, when I have the stroller with me I always try to use a handicapped stall and I just wheel the stroller (and child) in with me. I've done it so much my dd (my older child) now prefers the handicapped stalls - "let's use the big one Mommy." But you're right, a trip to the mall with two kids is a real laugh riot.

 

[sha_lyn]

I remeber seeing a story on China a few yrs ago and it was great how they had these safty seats in the bathroom stalls. The reason was since they travel by bike so much they don't oftner have bay carriers or strollers with them. I have seem them in 2 bathrooms in the us. One at a Mall in Miss. the other just a few days ago but I forget where.

 

[mom42860]

I took my son to WDw when he was 7, I was a single Mom at the time. I had never let him go into the bathroom alone (he is very small for his age and I'm always thinking worst case scenarios) Being Disney and thinking they have loads of security I let him go in. I stood by the door and waited and waited, being frantic I asked a Dad (who was had come up with children and wife) to check and see if my son was ok. He came out and said "he's fine he'll be right out". My son came out redfaced and was so mad at me for "embarrassing" him! I was so relieved I didn't care if he was mad forever
He's now 9 and sometimes I still make him come in the ladies room with me, I have seen plenty of other boys w/ thier Moms so he is not alone.

 

[Jordan's MOM]

I came across a situation this week I had not seen discussed here and thought I would share my word of caution.We were at a large airport and I went in to use the bathroom.That place was huge!Rows and rows of stalls.I got so confused as to where to go out.I am sure it would be confusing to a child.By the way I also got confused in the parking deck so take this with a grain of salt.LOL.
Jordan's Mom

 

[LMHB]

I was just going to say that I think those safety seats are wonderful, they are attached to the wall and you can strap your child right in, that way they can't crawl out under the door OR touch anything. I have only seen them in ONE place! The Macaroni Grill restaurant (in NC)

I was just going to mention, also, as I have two small boys, I don't always take them out of the stroller to use the bathroom, myself...and with a double stroller it won't fit in the stall, even the handicapped! Of course, the handicapped is not always available. Anyway, I have been know to (sorry if this is unpleasant) pee quickly while my children are parked in front of the stall WITH THE DOOR OPEN. I will usually partially close the door to try to retain SOME modesty, but seeing my kids the whole time is more important than my modesty! LOL (Plus, men seem to have no problem with this in their own bathroom)

On another note, I do not ever feel badly about using the handicapped stall when available. I use it as quickly as I can and get out. I honestly figure that with two small boys grabbing at everything and trying to get out and crawl under doors (I have even been know to have to use the bathroom with one on my lap) I am as handicapped as the next person! Plus, I read somewhere that handicapped stalls are statistically cleaner than others...and that the very FIRST stall you walk into is always the dirtiest, just something to think about with little hands grabbing.