First, I don't buy the whole "I don't spend that much time in my room argument" because unless you have done Walt Disney World before, you probably won't know how much time you will spend there. Unlike
Disneyland, where you can do the "park commando" style in at opening and out at closing visit because it's only a one or two day trip, Disney World is HUGE. If Iwent park commando style for my entire visit and Iplanned to go to all the parks I would be a hot mess by the end of my "vacation" and more stressed out than when I left. I think first-timers underestimate the value of the afternoon break that is one of the best aspects of staying on-property. You will probably spend more time in your room than you think so don't shortchange yourself.
As to the "worth it" question. it really depends on what worth it means to you. In my opinion, the biggest jump in terms of resort quality comes from the moderate to deluxe level (value to moderate nets you only more toned down theming, a pool with a waterslide, and slightly bigger rooms). Here is what you get in a deluxe that you don't get in a moderate.
1. Bigger rooms with 2 queen beds and oftentimes a day bed (and BIGGER BATHROOMS!)
2. Windows that don't face the hallway and usually balconies or patios and great views (usually for a slightly higher rate)
3. With the exception of the AKL, the deluxes are in better locations within the complex that usually have at least one non-bus means of getting to the parks that takes less than 15 minutes.
4. The best hotel restaurants (although counter service restaurants are usually lacking)
5. Big themed pools (although the CSR's is better than a couple Deluxe's)
6. Interior corridors instead of the motel-style set-up at the moderates.
7. Concierge/Room Service available
8. Kid's clubs
9. Turndown service upon request
10. In the renovated Deluxes rooms with flatscreen tvs
There are more but those are the most important ones from my perspective. That said, if you don't think those extra features and services are worth the price difference, then the deluxes aren't worth it. In terms of quality, the deluxes are on par with the Hilton/Marriott level, maybe a little below that. If you or your family is used to that kind of hotel, or most full-service hotels (even ones that charge half the price of Disney) then it might be worth it to stay at a deluxe resort. You simply have to accept that you are paying more than you usually would for that type of hotel. My family generally stays at that level when we travel other places (albeit for a lot less than Disney charges) and its worth it to us to pay for the deluxe level so we can have that type of hotel. It just takes a lot of the edge off the vacation and helps us relax more. If you are used to that kind of hotel I would reccomend biting the bullet and staying deluxe.