Anyone have experience with Au Pairs

[Megster]

I'm currently a college junior and feeling an "itch" to go out and see the world. I was looking at some companies online that "hire" american girls and then place them with families abroad. I was just wondering if anyone here has had experience with au pairs - being one, employing one, knowing someone who has done it? Also do you know which companies are more reputable both here and abroad? It's a brand new idea for me so I basically know nothing about it, so any info would be really helpful and greatly appreciated. TIA!

 

[salmoneous]

I don't know anything about Americans going abroad to be au paris, but I knew several non-Americans who worked here as au pairs. It was a great way for them to see the US. But two things to keep in mind...

1) Families that hire au pairs are invariably "weird" Not necessarily in an evil way, just quirky. Every au pair I knew had tons of stories about their families.

2) Don't do it if you form strong attachments. One minute you are for all intents and purposes a member of a family, the next minute you are literally homeless and facing deportation - never to see the children you cared for again. Hopefully, if all goes well, you get hooked up with a new family and it starts over again.

Best of luck,
Sal

 

[jel0511]

One other thing to consider, you have to be fluent in another language to be sent abroad, I know all au pairs I've seen here in the state speak pretty good english. I even looked into it for our family and all "foreigners" have to take a fluency test in english before being placed. If you're not fluent, your only option would be where english is the main language, England. They have a pretty good nanny/au pair system in place and rarely take non-foreign speaking non-English subjects.

 

[golfgal]

I have heard too many horror stories about nanny's all over the world. I wouldn't do it. Personally I would do a study abroad program with your school. If it doesn't work to do one during the year my sister did one the summer after she graduated so that might be an idea.

My fear would be you would end up with a non-traveling family, you don't really get time off, so you would be stuck watching these kids every day for however long and never see anything but their town.

 

[Megster]

I've thought about study abroad, but I don't want to study . I'm not a huge fan of college at the moment and really want to take time off. I figured something like an au pair program would be a good alternative than just running away somewhere with no plan.

I took 4 years of spanish, so I'm functional in spanish. I was looking at a program in the Netherlands and the company said that no language requirement was needed because most people, and many of the families that go through them, speak english. I also was looking into placement in Austrialia.

 

[golfgal]

I've thought about study abroad, but I don't want to study . I'm not a huge fan of college at the moment and really want to take time off. I figured something like an au pair program would be a good alternative than just running away somewhere with no plan.

I took 4 years of spanish, so I'm functional in spanish. I was looking at a program in the Netherlands and the company said that no language requirement was needed because most people, and many of the families that go through them, speak english. I also was looking into placement in Austrialia.

The study abroad programs really don't have all that rigorous of a class schedule. The real intent of the programs are to get the kids out traveling and see the world. Most of my friends that went overseas in college had pretty basic classes, very little studying. Look into the program, ask some people that have been what the course load is like. It is VERY different then being on campus and will offer you the change you are looking for without having to watch someone elses kids.

 

[kdibattista]

My brother just spent a semester in Amsterdam and I don't think he studied much

 

[Charade]

Anyone have experience with Au Pairs?

Well, there was this one time, at band camp...

 

[golfgal]

Ok, my BIL just send DH a form to fill out as a character reference for them because they want to hire an Au Pair from France. Now, my BIL and SIL are nice people, their DD is the nicest little girl you will ever meet, their DS is, well, a holy terror and they have a newborn. They live in a big old house that is a side by side duplex which they own-completly updated, the Au Pair will have the other side of the duplex, it all sounds well and good until you see their neighborhood. I don't like going there in the daytime let alone at night. They are actually very well off financially and my SIL wants to move, BADLY (they are looking at places on Summit Ave for anyone familiar with St. Paul--it is the street where the governor's mansion is for those that aren't so it isn't like they can't afford to move, just haven't found the right house), BIL has issues with change and he doesn't think there is anything wrong with the neighborhood (must not notice the drive by shootings going on down the street ). Do you want to end up living in a place like this?

 

[Kallison]

My good friend and neighbor went through three au pairs and used them for years. I can tell you that her au pairs were treated extremely well, they had a the use of a car, she gave them a gym membership and lots of free time, a lovely suite to live in. HOWEVER the way she treated her au pair seemed to be very much the exception to the rule. The other girls were treated horribly, never given extra money to entertain the kids, not given much time off, or use of a car, crappiest basement room in the house with no windows. It seemed to me like they were indentured servants. This is something you want to research very, very carefully -- you could wind up being with a real lunatic of a family.

If I were you I would finish your senior year. You are so close, why drop out now. Suck it up and get it done, then go look for your adventure with degree in hand. Everyone thinks they have all the time in the world, but once you stop school it will be twice as hard to start up again. It seems like such a waste to not complete your degree now.

 

[sweetspicy]

I've thought about study abroad, but I don't want to study . I'm not a huge fan of college at the moment and really want to take time off. I figured something like an au pair program would be a good alternative than just running away somewhere with no plan.

I took 4 years of spanish, so I'm functional in spanish. I was looking at a program in the Netherlands and the company said that no language requirement was needed because most people, and many of the families that go through them, speak english. I also was looking into placement in Austrialia.

I think it sounds kind of interesting. I don't have any stories about au pairs, but I just wanted to wish you luck if you decide to do it!

 

[DISshopkeeper]

My niece did this. It was awful. The day-to-day care of children is very hard, even if they are yours and you love them to pieces. She grew to hate it and was very regretful that she did it. She was fluent in French and did this in France.

Beside that, you are SO CLOSE to finishing college. Why not just stick it out and finish and then have your adventure?

 

[JadenLayne]

Honestly there is no way I would quit college. I did drop out in my Jr. Year with every intention of going back the next year to finish my degree. It NEVER happened. I regret it to this day. Without a degree in your hand it is going to be very hard finding any kind of job that pays well.

I understand the wanting to see the world but PLEASE WAIT until after you graduate. Then if you hate it and want to come home you have that degree IN YOUR HAND and can find a job.

That being said I'm 35 years old and could never be that far away from my family either. I can't imagine not having my mother (my father passed away) where I could reach her when I'm sick or just want my mommy (and I say this with a husband and 15 year old son too, LOL).

Seriously finish college, you are so so so so close and even though you say Oh I'll go back the majority of people don't. Get that degree and THEN go and see the world so when you want to come home you can.

Good luck!

 

[phorsenuf]

Megster, have you looked into the study abroad semester at UNH? My DS has and looks really good. He plans to appy for it. Its in England and my nephew did the same program (through Ithica) several years ago. Study time was pretty minimal and he traveled somewhere almost every weekend. They really encourage it. He enjoyed it so much and made such good contacts after graduation he went back to England for work.
If you haven't looked into it yet you may want to consider it. I can give you mt DS email too if you want to email him.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

 

[DisneyMommyMichelle]

just want to wish you luck and SECOND the emotion of finishing school! Do programs through school! i went to Amsterdam (VERRY goreous place!), France, Spain, Germany...everywhere and had a blast!! people are very right in telling you there is next to no studying involved! they want to get you OUT there!

 

[gina2000]

Almost everyone goes through that feeling somewhere during their college career. It's so close, yet so far.

Most people don't go back if they stop in the middle. It can take years for them to get back into the college mode. Making money is just too alluring to resist.

I've known families with nannies in the US. It's hard work. And very often circumstances are not good depending on either the family or the au pair. Taking care of children is an enormous responsibility and not one to be undertaken lightly.

I second the motion to look into a semester abroad. Sometimes, that's the break you need to bring you back rarin' to go.

Good luck with your decision.

 

[FinallyBoughtDVC]

Yikes! I'm astounded by some of these rude comments about Au Pairs and the families that host them.

We have a fabulous Au Pair from Germany, we've met many of the other girls who came over through the same agency. They're, for the most part, treated wonderfully by their host families. Of course, some girls that came over with our Au Pair were not a good match with their host family (the girls all stay in contact with each other) and are then placed into a different family by the agency.

If you go through a reputable agency, you are allowed to choose the family you stay with. We had to provide tons of information about ourselves, have a formal interview, have her room inspected to make sure it was appropriate, etc. The Au Pair receives support from a local coordinator, has monthly meetings, is well-trained (attends a training school), etc.

I resent the implication that families that host Au Pairs are weird. Many families in my area have au pairs - it's a wonderful way to have an extra pair of hands around the house. It's like having a daughter/big sister.

Our Au Pair is taking college classes (at our expense), drives a 2004 Volvo S80 (at our expense), has traveled with us on all vacations (at our expense), has made tons of friends in the area, travels on her own on her weekend off (this weekend she's heading to Washington, D.C.).

In any event - being and having an Au Pair is a wonderful, cultural exchange when you go through a top-rated agency and choose a family that you feel 100% comfortable with.

I am sure there are many families that treat these girls (and guys - lots of guys are Au Pairs as well) terribly. That's why the agency you use MUST be top of the line and have lots of support in place if the placement doesn't work out. Just like you can end up with an awful college roommate - you can also end up with an awful family. It's how easy it is to get out of that situation that really matters. It's all about the agency.

Good luck to you in whatever you choose.

 

[golfgal]

Yikes! I'm astounded by some of these rude comments about Au Pairs and the families that host them.

We have a fabulous Au Pair from Germany, we've met many of the other girls who came over through the same agency. They're, for the most part, treated wonderfully by their host families. Of course, some girls that came over with our Au Pair were not a good match with their host family (the girls all stay in contact with each other) and are then placed into a different family by the agency.

If you go through a reputable agency, you are allowed to choose the family you stay with. We had to provide tons of information about ourselves, have a formal interview, have her room inspected to make sure it was appropriate, etc. The Au Pair receives support from a local coordinator, has monthly meetings, is well-trained (attends a training school), etc.

I resent the implication that families that host Au Pairs are weird. Many families in my area have au pairs - it's a wonderful way to have an extra pair of hands around the house. It's like having a daughter/big sister.

Our Au Pair is taking college classes (at our expense), drives a 2004 Volvo S80 (at our expense), has traveled with us on all vacations (at our expense), has made tons of friends in the area, travels on her own on her weekend off (this weekend she's heading to Washington, D.C.).

In any event - being and having an Au Pair is a wonderful, cultural exchange when you go through a top-rated agency and choose a family that you feel 100% comfortable with.

I am sure there are many families that treat these girls (and guys - lots of guys are Au Pairs as well) terribly. That's why the agency you use MUST be top of the line and have lots of support in place if the placement doesn't work out. Just like you can end up with an awful college roommate - you can also end up with an awful family. It's how easy it is to get out of that situation that really matters. It's all about the agency.

Good luck to you in whatever you choose.

That is here in the US, what about the reverse, US kids going to Europe or where ever to be an Au Pair, what kind of guarantees do they have that way, you just never know.

My BIL/SIL will be very generous to their Au Pair, I just don't like their neighborhood and would NEVER live there.

 

[supercarrie]

Another recommendation for you, if you want to take some time off, and being an au pair doesn't work out, is to look into the programs at www.bunac.org. Basically government approved work-abroad programs, where you can take up almost any form of work. They have programs for Britain, Ireland, Australia, New Zealand, and other places. I just spent 6 months in London on the Work in Britain program (took fall quarter off from UCLA) and it was an incredible experience. Feel free to PM me if you have any questions about it!

 

[Megster]

Megster, have you looked into the study abroad semester at UNH?

I have looked into the study abroad programs. My best friend is in England right now actually. My first two years I was pre-vet so it was difficult for me to study abroad in that major so I didn't give much thought into the programs until last semester when I switched to my current major which is alot more flexible.
I really appreciate everyones advice! I am really struggling with the decision to take a year off or just suck it up and finish. At this point, though, I'm so unhappy here that I feel like I'm wasting my time and more importantly my parents money. I feel confident that I would return to school to finish my degree, but I do understand the concern that I wouldn't go back. Thanks again for all your concern and advice.

FinallyBoughtDVC - did your agency send american girls overseas or was it for american familes? I've been searching online at different sights, but its hard to know which agencies are the top notch ones since they all make relatively the same claims about being top notch
supercarrie - thanks for the link!!