Any other DISers trying to concieve? Reread OP for the QOTD!

[mickeyboat]

Chelle - sorry about the old hag. And, yes, there is always next month. hang in there.

Vick - I think the best way is to vent to us. That is what we are here for. My DH was very supportive when we were having trouble, but we talked about it a lot! We were also immersed in treatment (drugs, ultrasounds, shots, etc), so we focused on the daily grind of treatments together, which I think helped a lot. So I wonder if you involved your DH more, and it didn't all seem like such a mystery he could not control, it would be easier for him.

Enjoy your mucinex and baby aspirin and grapeftuir juice everyone!

Denae

 

[helenabear]

Chelle Sorry about that

Suzanne, I am so glad you have your peace... I wish I could be going to WDW too though!

Woo hoo for DL Rebecca!!! Where will you be staying?

Vick, I wish I had some good words of wisdom for you. My DH was in for this expecting it to take years to get pregnant. So he never got upset like I did. I admit I never cried when I saw AF... I was in way too much pain to be emotional about it. My mind was always on trying to eat enough and get enough drugs in me to kill it off. I would cry thoughout the rest of the month though. The last month before the pregnancy in the fall was the worst. My DH was starting to feel like I was unhappy with him when it was just me. Then I got pregnant and lost the baby.... nothing has been the same since (I found my peace). So I wish I could give advice, but my DH was optimistic the whole time. It never got to him like it did to me (he wanted the baby, but understood it could easily take a year).

 

[TinkerChelle]

Enjoy your mucinex and baby aspirin and grapeftuir juice everyone!

Denae

Need a little help here. The baby aspirin helps with the uterine lining? The grapefruit juice helps with CM? What does the mucinex do and when do you take it? Should I start doing this all now for my next try? TIA!

Thank you for all the support and hugs ladies!

 

[LisaB]

Hi All My computer is down so I am using the one at the public library YUK. I got my return in and it is all gone with paying bills etc. We decided to go to Disney next April I am just looking for flights which suck

 

[TinkerChelle]

Today I was sandwiched between two pregnant girls at my deposition. One is due in July, so she's huge. I kept catching myself staring at her rubbing her belly. Wish that was me.

Skuttle I feel for you! There is an epidemic of pregnant woman running around downtown Chicago this week! Every corner this morning I saw pregnant bellies! It is hard not to stare, isn't it?

 

[exwdwcm]

Thanks for the info. Maybe next month I will use Clear Blue Easy Digital. AF came late this afternoon. I don't know what else to say. Feeling icky, but at least we get to try again next month. I am grateful for that, but right now it is hard to focus on next month. I cried pretty hard which surprised me. I really thought I was pregnant. Hopefully next month. I'll invest in some baby aspirin now! I am glad I found you all here. I can vent my craziness with you!

Baby dust to everyone trying this month! I want to see some BFPs!!

Tinkerchele, i am so sorry. that evil witch!!! you know, i had the same thing happen to me- every natural cycle, every clomid cycle (4), every IUI cycle (4), i would think i was pregnant, think i was having symptoms (especially when on the fertility drugs, they trick you) and then i was let down each month. it really sucked. by the end, i started going the other way and just thiking i wasn't pregnant, that way, i wouldn't be as disappointed when i got yet another BFN. it was hard to be a 'glass is half empty' type of person, but that was how i got by. i was so tired of failure every month. i eventually got into a routine where i gave myself about 2-3 days to mourn the BFN. and i do mean mourn. it is rough and you deserve time to mourn it. i was travel a lot of the time by myself for work when i tested in a hotel room bathroom alone and i would just sit and cry ont he toliet all night looking at this BFN test. then the next day, i would clear my head and focus on the next cycle and go gung ho forward. i wouldn't let myself live in the past, but only think about going ahead. it is what helped get me through. to all of you- hope that helps- it is what got me through that year in fertility treatments and constantly being disappointed. there is always hope for the next cycle and that is what you have to focus on.

btw- chele- your name is so meaningful to me- my real name is michelle and i am a huge Tink fan!! my username on other boards is always Tink and my boston terrirer is even named Tinkerbell and we are doing the nursery in peter pan! lol- so love the name!

Suzanne- have a great time on your trip!! sounds wonderful. i am so jealous. i got burnt out on WDW this year since we i was there last april for work, then again in august with DH and then again and again in january for work. i guess i just had my fill, but now i am gettin the itch again. i am sure you will have a blast!!!

 

[exwdwcm]

I'm just checking in again as I'm looking for some advice. On this thread we're all going through the same thing but my DH said something to me yesterday that made me think and then I felt like a complete b***h!!

Obviously, for us who are TTC, when AF arrives it can be known for us to take it quite badly - well I know I do and I end up crying for hours and generally just be really upset!! And at that time, I'm hoping DH will be very understanding and support me and make me feel better. But he said to me, who's there to support him month after month when it doesn't happen? I have been so caught up in the fact that AF shows up time and time again, I never really stop to think how this is affecting him as well. So of course I felt like a complete b***h for not being supportive of him. I did also try to explain that I do understand it is hard on him too, but that when AF does show up, it's not always the best time for me to be supportive to him, as I get really bad stomach cramps and still some effects from PMT which makes me really moody!! He did agree in the end that maybe that wasn't the best time to bring it up as I was a complete mess at the time!!

I guess what I'm trying to ask is, when you feel like absolute c**p about the fact that AF has showed up again, what's the best way to deal with it yourself and then also offer support to DH as he's upset too? I just find it impossible to look after myself at that point, let alone look after his feelings too but I know that makes me sound like a complete uncaring cow!! I'm not really, it's just I'm finding TTC so hard at the moment.

Any advice will be gratefully received!!

Vick

Vick- you know that is a great point about our DH's or partners....sometimes we don't think about them. we are so focused on ourselves and our goal, that we just don't think what they are feeling. and hey, they are guys, they usually aren't emotionally out there like us. but it surprised me when a dear friend suffered her second m/c (first one was early, like within days of testing)---her second was at like 7-8 weeks, so it was really rough for her. Her DH is very supportive, emotional guy. She cried and mourned it for weeks. He never let on he was upset, until one day at church, they were praying and he asked if she was okay now, if she was at peace with the loss and she said yes and so he just started balling like a baby. he said now that he knew she was okay, he could finally let it out for himself. he siad he had tried to be strong for her and never let himself grieve it. now he did. that story touched my heart. we sometimes forget the guys while not always upfront about their feelings are going through stuff sometimes too.

my DH was just optimistic like Elaine's DH. every month i would say it didn't happen and he would say 'oh well, we will just try again next month'. and next month he would begrudingly give yet another 'sample' for the IUI again. lol......i am sure he felt more inside than he let on, but he never let me know it. just vent to us- ask DH how he is doing- just a simple question like that- that way, he knows you care. i think just asking him if he is okay, how is he doing shows himyou care and are supportive without you having to bend over backwards while you are still dealing with it yourself.

 

[helenabear]

Chelle, I think that Michelle has a good idea. Just talking to your DH will probably help. If you feel the need to vent, come to us... we'll listen and totally understand!

Allison, I forgot to say I am sooooo very sorry that you were stuck between those two girls. That would've made me want to cry I think.

 

[DisneyDreamer8]

Vicki-I don't really have much in the way of advice except to say that Denae is right, come here to vent. My DH is very supportive and never seems to get to down when AF shows.

TinkerChelle-The mucinex helps thin down the CM. I hope next month is the one for you!!!

Elaine-We are staying at the Best Western right across from the entrance. We have never stayed "on site" because I just can't justify the cost. It costs more for us to fly and stay at DL for 4 days then it does to fly and stay at WDW for 7 days. So we usually road trip to DL (16 hours) saves about $400.

LisaB-Congrats on your trip!!! I know it can be a pain to try and find the perfect flight for the right price. Hope your computer gets fixed soon.

 

[mzspaz]

I'm typically a lurker on these boards and only reply to something every once in a while. But I have followed along with this thread since nearly the beginning since I was TTC when this was started.

I know exactly what you ladies are going through as it took my DH and over a year of TTC....actually more than that. I went off the BCP in May of 2005 (wow, it's been 2 years!) and my DH and I knew that we didn't want to "try" right away but figured we would give my body some time to adjust. We figured 3 months. So in August, I started the dreaded dance with the BFN. My cycles still had not regulated by then, but we figured what the heck, plus my doctor had told me that after being on the pill for 10 years, it could take about a year to get regular.

My cycles finally developed a regular pattern right around March of 2006, nearly a year after going off the pill. That is when we started to actually try. We tried to time it right....I tried to chart...the whole kit and kaboodle. And that is when I started to get VERY depressed, just like a lot of you.

We had a trip scheduled for DW for September 2006 and DH and I laughed that it would be great to bring home a "little souvenier". Right....AF showed up the day we left. So that put an end to that as well as threw a wrench into my whole cycle as she was a week early.

I had called my DR and they wanted me to chart, so I started temping and actually putting forth effort to it. The very next month, I was convinced that I was pregnant, had all the symptoms and thought I just "knew". Guess what....a BFN again.

The point of this whole post is to tell you that I eventually got my BFB the very next month and I can honestly tell you that I swore up and down that I was not pregnant...had no symptoms...didn't have a "feeling"...nothing. And guess what, that is the month that DH and I totally relaxed and decided that TTC would take a break and I would get some dental work done then we would TTC again. Of all the times to get pregnant, this was the worst...and I don't mean that in a horrible nasty way...I just mean that that would not have been the moment that "I" picked. I really needed to get the dental work done ( I have to be drugged to see the dentist...absolutely terrified) and I did not want to be pregnant during the hot summer. But I realized that it wasn't up to me. Apparently this little baby had a mind of his own from the moment he was conceived!


I just wanted to share my story with all of you because I see how heartbreaking it is to each and every one of you. There are some stories that break my heart and others that make me jump for joy in this thread. Hope you don't mind me jumping in here.

And one more thing.....I do swear by the PreSeed. DH and I used it the night that this little one was conceived because it was the only thing available and handy at that moment because it had just arrived in the mail. Considering our timing every other time had been much better than this time, I was not thinking that it would have an affect. And this was 3 days before I O'd. Guess I was wrong

 

[TinkerChelle]

Tinkerchele, i am so sorry. that evil witch!!! you know, i had the same thing happen to me- every natural cycle, every clomid cycle (4), every IUI cycle (4), i would think i was pregnant, think i was having symptoms (especially when on the fertility drugs, they trick you) and then i was let down each month. it really sucked. by the end, i started going the other way and just thiking i wasn't pregnant, that way, i wouldn't be as disappointed when i got yet another BFN. it was hard to be a 'glass is half empty' type of person, but that was how i got by. i was so tired of failure every month. i eventually got into a routine where i gave myself about 2-3 days to mourn the BFN. and i do mean mourn. it is rough and you deserve time to mourn it. i was travel a lot of the time by myself for work when i tested in a hotel room bathroom alone and i would just sit and cry ont he toliet all night looking at this BFN test. then the next day, i would clear my head and focus on the next cycle and go gung ho forward. i wouldn't let myself live in the past, but only think about going ahead. it is what helped get me through. to all of you- hope that helps- it is what got me through that year in fertility treatments and constantly being disappointed. there is always hope for the next cycle and that is what you have to focus on.

btw- chele- your name is so meaningful to me- my real name is michelle and i am a huge Tink fan!! my username on other boards is always Tink and my boston terrirer is even named Tinkerbell and we are doing the nursery in peter pan! lol- so love the name!

Suzanne- have a great time on your trip!! sounds wonderful. i am so jealous. i got burnt out on WDW this year since we i was there last april for work, then again in august with DH and then again and again in january for work. i guess i just had my fill, but now i am gettin the itch again. i am sure you will have a blast!!!

Thanks so much for the encouragement! I am trying to not think about it so much and just get on with the next cycle. It is hard when AF is giving me the worst cramps ever! Probably just becuz it knows how mad I am at it!

By the way, I have two boston terriers, too...but not named Tink!

 

[Gurgi]

I'm leaving work now, but I'll write when I get home. Just wanted to second the Pre-Seed...it's awesome stuff.

 

[skuttle]

So I stopped at the store on my way home from work to pick up more grapefruit juice. I made sure this time to buy the white grapefruit juice instead of red. I'm looking at the labels...the bottle of white grapefruit juice has the exact same amount of sugar as the carton of red grapefruit juice. Also has the same amount of calories, same amount of fat. White has 40mg more potassium, but it also has 35mg of sodium whereas the red has 0mg of sodium?!? I thought I'm supposed to drink the white because it's "better." I haven't tasted the white yet...if it's worese than the red I'm going back to red!

Vick...My husband is also the "oh, well...we'll try again next month" type. I think it hurts him more when I'm upset than the fact that we aren't pregnant yet. He feels that I'm not happy or satisfied with him and DS because I get so sad about not getting pregnant. It's so hard to explain that I am VERY happy with my life now...I just really want another child. He gets more upset about seeing me so upset. He was great when I went through my chemical pregnancy and cried for days. He let me cry, let me vent and was there when I needed him. I try to limit my venting in front of DH because I know it bothers him. I also limit my feelings about TTC with my girlfriends because I know they are all getting close to TTC and I don't want to be a downer. They know we're trying, but don't really know the sadness I've been having. I let it all out on here, though, so I'm so thankful to have all of you girls! I really don't know what kind of emotional state I would be in without this outlet here!

Chelle: The mucinex is supposed to thin the CM to make it easier for the sperm to swim.

 

[DisneyDreamer8]

Allison-So how was the white grapefruit juice?? You are a brave brave woman

Well I got a +opk last night

12 hours until POTC3!!!!!!!!!

 

[snoopygirl79]

Hello all

I'm so glad it's Friday and we've got a Bank Holiday on Monday so a 3 day weekend!! Yay!!

I'm feeling a bit better about things at the moment. I went to see my doctor yesterday and promptly burst into tears in her office!! Oops!! I explained how we're TTC but no luck and how it's making me very depressed etc. I was expecting her to say come back in 4 months when it's been a year but no. She said they'd start off by taking a blood test which needs to be taken between CD1 and CD5 and I was on CD4 so she took it there and then!! And I need another blood test 7 days before my next expected AF so I'll have to guess when that would roungly be as AF is so irregular!! She also said DH will need to have his swimmers tested - so I left with a specimen pot and instructions for him (well, what to do with the specimen afterwards as opposed to.....well I think you know what I mean!!!). So we'll see what these tests all show and go from there.

When DH got home and I told him what he had to do he was a little speechless as he didn't think things would happen this quickly. I was a bit upset that he wasn't jumping at the chance to do it, just to put our minds at ease - but I think it's cos he's a bit worried that there might be something wrong with him. He said he's fine about it all but he's not the best at expressing his feelings so I guess we'll just have to wait and see what the results are.

Thanks for letting me share and sorry for TMI!!

Vick

 

[snoopygirl79]

Just thought I'd add some personal comments:

Alison - good luck with the grapefruit juice - I hope it's bearable for you!!

DisneyDreamer8 - congrats on the +opk - go for it girl!!!

TinkerChelle - I'm really sorry AF showed. I know what you mean about AF giving you really bad cramps - it feels like an extra blow!!

mzspaz - Thanks so much for your encouraging words, it's always lovely to hear a happy ending like that and it gives us all hope.

Thanks to everyone for your advice on dealing with DH and his feelings. I will make sure I ask him more about how he's feeling about everything but I just know he'll just say fine as he's not good at sharing!! But I hope he'll appreciate that I'm asking him more!!

Vick

 

[KristineN]

Hi everyone...

I am new to this thread....I am beginning the journey of IVF. I was truly hoping to be able to do IUI...but it is not a possibility for us since the issue is with my DH. I got the results of my FSH...and I am fine. I am somewhat freaking out...as the process seems so overwhelming to me. Not to mention the cost!!! We will only be able to try this once...so that freaks me out as well.

 

[lovinwdw]

Hey everyone. So, I finally got all the results back from our testing and they said everything looks perfect! 1 in 10,000 chance for downs and trisomy and 1 in 1,300 chance for neural tube defects (they top out at 135). She said all results are negative!!! I am so relieved. I knew there wouldn't be any issues, but it's always nice to have reassurance. Now I can't wait until 6/4 to find out if it's a boy or a girl and get started on the nursery!!!

 

[Princess Tinkerbell]

Hi all, I can't believe I found you today. We got back from Jamaica a couple of weeks ago and for some reason I couldn't find the thread. I had checked a couple of times since and found it today. So much has happened in a month. Congrats to Meredith! Lots of new names, very exciting.

Jamica was great, we had a blast. So much for going on a nice relaxing vacation and getting knocked up. Oh well. I have had an eventful 2 weeks of TTC. It's a very long story, but shortly after I got back from Jamiaca I had an appoitemnt with an RE. Turns out I have some issues, and probably can't get pg w/o some help. I am only at the 6 month mark and my OB was giving me the be patient for a year speach. I just happened to say the right thing to the right person and I was sitting in front of an RE 5 days later. After a ton of blood work, lots of history, and an ultra sound, they had a pretty good handle on my problem. I started off telling the guy that it was really too soon to be there, but my friend was so insistent that she set it up. I really expected him to glance at my measly three charts and tell me to come back in 6 months. He didn't. He saw some hormone levels in my charts from the hot flash episodes a couple of years ago coupled w/ my 8 day luteal phase from my charts, and he recommened investigating. I read in a couple of posts that some of you were thinking about investigating why you didn't have your BFP, but had been told to wait for the year mark. I just wanted to let everyone know that many REs will see you before that. Just listen to your heart and get a second opinion if you are worried that there could be a problem.

I also wanted to give a super big thanks to Michelle, Nicole, and Rebekah for their advice on books and websites to learn more when I first stumbled onto this site. Without the charting and that early FSH test, the doctor would have told me to come back in 6 months.

I'm glad I found the thread again.

Jennifer

 

[7beasley]

Hi Jennifer -- glad to hear Jamica was so much fun -- sorry that the RE said there were some issues -- we are here for you -- if you need/want to PM me please feel free. There is no shame in needing help. Alot of us have been there before and alot of us soon to be moms are ONLY in that position because we got help! Good luck and I am glad the RE is helping you "early"!

Hi all -- hope everyone enjoys the long weekend. Good luck to those in the 2ww and for those that had a recent unwelcomed visitor - I am sorry and you are in my thoughts.

Tink and Michelle -- so cool you guys have boston terriers -- I love love love all the smushed face breeds -- I have a bulldog - love of my life -- my DH and I often say that if we ever won the lottery - we could quit our jobs and buy the entire assortment of smushed face dogs (pug, boxer, boston, bulldog...) and live happily every after with our crew of smelly dogs!!

**************
I had my 16 wk check up today and all is well -- I got to hear the baby's heartbeat again (using the doppler) -- it was just amazing and was measuring in at 162 bpm! My blood pressure was perfect and I have gained 3 lbs (which is a change from last time when I lost a pound) - but now that my morning sickness is pretty much over - I am finally eating again!

I have my u/s to find out if this peanut is a boy or a girl on June 22nd -- I cannot wait!!!!

***************

Hope everyone has a great long weekend!

Hugs,
Nicole